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Pinkie's Beautiful Day10,853 words
At the Gym11,136 words
Apple-land15,539 words
Fluttershy's Not Crazy Day3,725 words
Rarity's Dead-end2,452 words
Twilight's Solution8,601 words
Interlude: The Best Adventure Ever12,031 words

Interlude: The Best Adventure Ever

"One, two, three, four. I declare a burp war." Then I burped.

Rainbow Dash burped too. She burped louder. She had an impressive burp, if I do say so.

No one else burped. How boring.

"You win," I said.

Rainbow pumped her hoof in the air.

Okay, yeah, so we were going on the sea, in a boat that we had borrowed, basically looking for trouble. We were following the map that the little spider had given us. You remember the little spider? Of course you do. It gave me a map, and then, we followed it, out on adventure. Yes, yes, I know. This was after everything that happened with the changeling. Do we really even have to get into that, Twilight?

Nothing mattered to us, as we braved the seas. I was up on deck, doing my normal boating games, and now, there was plenty of space to do them in, so that felt great. It really did. I love doing that, and I especially love being around my friends. I love a lot of things that I got to do that day, and it was a beautiful day. I'm just happy. Thank Celestia we got to do all this. This is the story of the best adventure ever.

I looked through my spyglass. I thought I saw another ship out there, but on second thought, maybe it was nothing, so I kept on hula-hopping through the ship.

"Hey," Rainbow said. "Watch it, pal."

"I'm sorry," I said. Then I stopped. "I want to go baking now." So I did. I baked. I walked inside the ship and baked. "How does baking inside ships work?" I said. "Maybe not any different than normal baking." I picked up a carton of eggs. Then I dropped it, eggs going all across the floor. "Stupid eggs. I can't even look at them."

"Hey," Rainbow said.

I tried picking up the egg-mess off the floor, swiping at it with my hoof. "Not now, Rainbow. I'm doing eggs."

"Pinkie, it's time to get serious." I looked at the mess, and then, I walked out into the outside of the ship, to see what the fuss was about.

A giant spider was standing there, with his pirate-skull hat. It was Captain Spider. "Har-har-har."

"You want any eggs?" I said. "Do spiders eat eggs?"

"Now, you will tremble under the wrath of my spindly claws." Captain Spider laughed. All the other ponies, I mean my friends, were just standing there, confused. "Har."

"Um," I said. "But there's only one of you, and many of us."

Then, a bunch of guys climbed into the ship. It was Matey Jelly, Hairy the hare, the manic manatee, and of course, the great Trot-fox. How do I even remember their names? I never would've remembered it if it wasn't for what happened next, not that these guys weren't memorable.

Matey Jelly was playing the accordion. Captain Spider danced around.

"Nobody's smart but me," Captain Spider said, dancing.

Rainbow looked at me. "Where in the world could Twilight be? Just when you need her."

"She was going exploring," I said, smiling at Rainbow.

"Now," Captain Spider said, "where's the booty?"

I looked at Captain Spider, and then I turned to Rainbow. "Is he referring to our butts?"

Rainbow Dash looked away. Then she looked back at me, blushing. "Whatever, Pinkie. Just whatever, you know."

"What?"

Captain Spider walked up to us, while dancing. "Hello there, my scurvy little ponies."

Rainbow Dash looked to me. "Should we be fighting them? I mean, they haven't even tied us or anything?"

I shrugged.

"Now," Captain Spider said, laughing. "Let me introduce you to my crew."

"Pass," Rainbow said, trying to kick Captain Spider in the wooden leg he has, but to no avail. The leg never even budged. Do you believe it?

Captain Spider laughed, and then, he laughed louder and louder. "Ahaha. What jolly good fun."

"Could you stop laughing?" Rainbow said. She turned around to the others. "What are you just standing there for?"

"Well," Applejack said. "They haven't attacked us or nothing, um, yet."

"Yet is right," Rainbow said. "We need to get the upper hand."

Then, Matey Jelly's accordion-playing changed, and she got into a little rhythm, with a beat, and Captain Spider said, "Now, listen up my little ponies, and please do not be glum. This is not a place for ponies, a pirate's life's no fun! Unless you know the way around, and come to think, I do. So listen up, and let me tell you all about my crew."

"Um," Rainbow said. She whispered into my ear, "This is crazy."

"Okay," I said. "At least they're not hurting us or anything. They're just talking and walking around."

"Now, this is Matey Jelly," Captain Spider sang. "She's the first I knew." He hugged her. "We came up with this idea of pirating for two. She helped build my crew, and then, I sang wahoo. Knowing that she has been there makes me happy too."

The entire crew broke out. "You ponies too. You're gonna join the crew. Or else you walk the plank, and we will leave you in the blue."

"Oh, no," I said.

"Ho-ho," Captain Spider said.

I looked around. "No, I don't want it."

Captain Spider laughed. Matey Jelly broke out a solo on her accordion. Then, he kept singing. "Now, here's a little hare, whose name is Hairy, the hare. He came to where, to be and share, alike with me and you. He, and me, and everybody, together are we free, sharing the fruit of our honest labooor."

"Labor?"

"Labooor," Captain Spider sang. "And that is very true."

"It is?"

"Yes," Captain Spider said. "And you will get a part of it too, once you join us."

I shook my head. "I didn't sign up for this."

"Now, over here," Captain Spider said, "we have the manatee. He is kind of crazy, and manic as can be, but he is a manatee, and that is very sweet. We like him, even though we cannot also to him speak."

"Huhuh," the manatee said.

Then, all broke out. "Yo-hoho! We want you to us join. And then you will get all you need, inside our little boat."

"Hm," I said. "Is this a song?"

"Yes," Rainbow said. No. Yelled.

"Yes, I- never mind."

Captain Spider walked up to the fox. "Here we have a member of our crew of which I'm proud. Not that I'm not the others, but this is allowed. I'm really proud, especially, of this little guy. I like him and I'm proud of him."

"I'm the Trot-fox," he said. "You can't find a word that rhymes with fox?"

"Fox, fox, fox," Captain Spider broke out, and others, except for the fox, sang with him. "Fox-ely, fox-ely, fox! Fox-e fox-e, fox-fox-fox. We like having a fox!"

"Box?" the fox said. "Rocks? Docks? There are loads of words."

"We found him on the rocks," Captain Spider said.

The Trot-fox just said, "Okay."

"Then," Captain Spider said. "Let me tell you my backstory."

"How long is this freaking song?" Rainbow yelled, over the accordion. "Are you kidding me?"

Captain Spider ignored her. "Once, I was a little spider, without any dreams. But then I saw a lot of hope, if just only gleams. I saw a way to make my way, away across the world, and the one that inspired me, is Matey Jelly, yay."

"Yay," she said.

"Now, listen up, and hear my song, and don't be looking glum," he said. "Matey Jelly here, inspired, helped me to drink rum. She taught me everything there is, about pirating. And then she did more things, and you will hear her sing."

"Yay," she said. "I'm just a jellyfish, trying to survive, on the wild, wild, wild seaaas. Yay. I'm Matey Jelly."

Rainbow Dash sat down beside me. I was into it. Rainbow Dash looked, not angry, just confused. Well, who could blame her? I mean, right?

"And," Captain Spider said. "Cut off her jelly-leg." He pointed at her wooden leg. "Just so she could be, a pirate, which she is, so listen to my creed. She's a pirate now, and she became one, and that's neat."

"Running out of rhymes?" Rainbow said. "Peh."

Captain Spider sang, "She cut off her jelly-leg, just so she could be, a pirate, which she is, so listen as I sing."

"You sing?" I said.

"Listen up," Captain Spider said. "Who wants to walk the plank?" Everyone shouted.

"Crazy," Rainbow said.

Then, all sang, and even the manic manatee slurred along, making manatee sounds. "It's time for fate, a pirate and a day. To make you one of us and say, hey-hey-hey-hey." Everyone got quiet. "Heeey."

Captain Spider leaned against the side of the ship, catching his breath. "Ho-boy. I'm not as young as I used to be, back when I was a wee little spider."

"Okay," Rainbow said.

"I feel," I said, "that we've learned a lot about these guys in a short little while, so at least that's good."

"Okay, yeah. I guess," Rainbow said.

I looked at her, grimacing. "Now what?"

"Now," Captain Spider said. "Now, it's time to choose."

"I'm not sure I want to choose." I was hanging in a rope upside down. "Maybe I could choose to be friends. What do you think about that, you guys?"

"No," Captain Spider said. "There is no such choice. Either you choose to come with us, or you walk the plank."

Rainbow was hanging beside me, hanging down from the mast. "I don't know what you're babbling about, Pinkie. Of course we don't want to be part of their crew. That's crazy-talk."

"I know," I said, "but what can you do? Of course, I also want to escape, so if you have a way of doing that that doesn't have to do with negotiating with them, then tell me, Rainbow."

"Forget it," Rainbow said. "This whole situation is lame, way lame."

"Yes," I said. "It is pretty lame, isn't it?"

I saw that the others were talking, but I wasn't really paying attention, and no one really knew where Twilight had disappeared to, and that wasn't very nice, knowing that she was just gone like that.

I turned to Applejack, who was hanging on my other side. "Hello there, Apples."

"That's Applejack to you, Pinkie Pants." Applejack dangled around, moving her body to look at me, and maybe, trying to escape.

I laughed. "Let's give each other nicknames."

"But I like Applejack," she said.

Rainbow jumped in. "At least it's not Applefreak, Applejack."

"Yeah, at least it's not that," she said, pouting. "At least it's not that."

"Hey," I said. "I have an idea. What if I pretend to want to join them, and then they free me, and then, I can free you later, when I get the opportunity."

"You know," Rainbow said. "It's better than walking the plank."

"Okay," I said, feeling happy.

Applejack reached up and tried biting her rope, bending her body, since the rope was above her head, and tied to her body.

"Hey," Jelly said, from down there. "Do you have any idea how hard it was to make this rope? Think of all the hours I spent making those tiny knots, and now, you're going to destroy them. Shame on you."

"Are you scherious?" Applejack said, rope in mouth. She tried biting it, but nothing happened. Then she let go, and fell back down. "Okay, we go with your plan, Pinkie? What do you other girls say?"

Applejack turned to Fluttershy and Rarity.

"I'm sorry, what?" Rarity said. "I was talking to Fluttershy. What do you want?"

Applejack said, "Pinkie is going to pretend to join the pirates and then later help us escape, hopefully."

"Um, I understand," Rarity said. "Fluttershy, what do you think?"

Fluttershy just hung there, not saying anything, really.

"Sure," Rarity said.

"Okay," Applejack said. "Then let's do it, I guess?"

I wasted no time. "Hey!"

"Yes," Jelly said.

"I want to join you guys and became a pirate and stuff."

"Okay," Jelly said. "Then you can do it."

"Okay," I said. I turned to Rainbow, smiling. I couldn't even help it. "This is gonna go great."

I fell down, hitting my head on the deck of the ship. Someone must've loosened my ropes. "Ouch."

"Okay," Jelly said. "Now, we were going to play cards, so if you want to be a pirate, you can be one later."

"Does that mean that the outside of the ship, that is, the part that isn't the inside of the ship, is going to be empty?" I said.

"Yes."

I smiled. "Can I join you?"

"Playing cards?"

"Yes," I screamed, feeling excited about getting to play cards with some real pirates.

"Hey," Rainbow said. "Traitor."

I looked at her. "No, I'm not a- oooh, right, yeah. I sure am a traitor."

Matey Jelly said, "Yes, okay."

"No," Rainbow said. "You're going to play cards with them rather than staying out here and saving us? You really are a traitor."

"I know," I said, winking at her.

"Pinkie!" Rainbow said. "Pinkiiie!"

"Rainbow," I said, waving back at her.

"No," she said.

"Yes," I said. I opened the door of our ship, which was now taken over by pirates. "I'll see you guys later."

Rainbow looked like she wanted to kill me, and at the time, I really didn't understand why she was so upset, but after thinking about it, I get it, and I'm sorry, and I really am, but I was too lost in the moment. I was problems concentrating sometimes. I followed Jelly into the ship, and inside was Hairy the hare, and the manic manatee, and Captain Spider himself, playing cards.

"Okay," I said. I sat down. They were right on the inside of the ship, where there are also a few kitchen appliances and stuff, and a few windows. There were candles there for setting the mood. The curtains were closed. It was really nice, and for a little while, I forgot that my friends were all kidnapped. Yes, I know. That sounds pretty terrible when you say it like that, but it's true. That's what happened. I picked up a card. Jelly slid by and put it back on the table.

"You're in on the next game," she said.

"What are we playing?" I said.

"Anything," she said. She sat down in a chair beside me, and I didn't really get what she was saying, but I understood I would soon.

After like a minute, it was my time to play. I was given a few cards. I looked at them. I didn't get what I was doing, but that was okay by me.

"I like playing cards a lot," I said. Captain Spider began by laying a card on the table. Then the Hairy hare did, and then, it was my turn. "Um." I picked up a card out the the pile that Captain Spider and Hairy had made. "Go fish." I smiled at them.

Captain Spider leaned toward Hairy the hare. "Wow," he said. "She's really good."

I laughed. I was winning. Success, I thought. Then, I remembered my friends. I stood up.

"Um," I said.

Captain Spider grabbed his sword and pointed it at me. "You're going to go out there and save your friends, you charlatan!"

I sat back down. "No, I'm not. I was just stretching."

He drew back his sword. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't jump to conclusions so much. Please, oh my. No, please forgive me. This is really awkward."

Matey Jelly looked at him. "You should be ashamed of yourself."

"I'm so sorry," he said.

I giggled. I felt a bead of sweat running down my forehead. I giggled some more. "Heheh. Heh," I said, giggling. "That's- um, that's okay."

"You know," Captain Spider said. "I should really learn to be more trusting."

"Okay." I nodded. "Maybe you should."

"What do you mean?" Captain Spider said, pulling out his sword. "Are you hiding something?"

"Gosh golly willikers," I said, jumping out of my seat. "Please don't stab me."

"What?" Captain Spider said. "Are you crazy? Why would I do that? Unless, you're hiding something!" He pointed the sword at me.

"Mercy," I said, curling down on the floor. "Mercy."

"Captain Spider," Jelly said. "You put that sword down right now." She reached over and grabbed it out of his hand.

"Sorry," he said. "Maybe I have anger issues."

"There's no excuse," Jelly said, "for this sort of shameful behavior, Captain Spider."

"I'm so sorry," he said, standing up and walking away from the table. "You keep playing without me, all of you. I'll just see myself into bed."

Jelly crawled after him. "Don't try to guilt-trip me. I know you're just trying to make me feel guilty."

"I'm sorry," Captain Spider said.

"Say it like you really mean it," Jelly said.

"I'm really sorry," Captain Spider said.

"Okay," she said. "Then you come back to the table, and you'd better behave." And he did.

"Okie-dokie-lokie," I said, trying to keep my best poker-face. Now, I was getting more and more scared of getting discovered, and for everything that happened, every little thing, it felt like it was getting more likely. "Um," I said. "I think it's Jelly's turn, you guys."

Jelly sat down. "Straight flush," she said, putting down her cards.

"Wow," I said. "Isn't that kind of unlikely?"

Jelly reached over and took my cards. "I win."

"You do?" I said. "Well-played."

Captain Spider and Hairy the hare applauded, and I joined in. Then, I remembered my friends again. I had forgotten about them, for another moment, but now, I remembered.

"What now?" I said.

"We go again," Captain Spider said.

"I'm happy," I said.

"That's good," Captain Spider said.

"I don't want to be a hassle," I said, actually feeling like I needed to pee, so I really had an excuse this time.

"Why? How so?" Captain Spider said.

"Can I go to the bathroom?" I said.

Captain Spider looked at Jelly. "This ship has a bathroom? Why doesn't our ship have that? They get a bathroom?"

"I don't know," she said. "I really don't know."

"Okay," I said. "I'm just going to the bathroom. There's nothing suspicious about that."

"I agree," Captain Spider said.

I walked past Captain Spider, and down to the lower deck.

He reached out his sword toward me. "Here, take my sword!"

I looked at the sword, and then at him. Then, I fainted.

I woke up. "Boy, that sure was a scary sword. Why am I hanging upside down?"

"You were going to betray us," Captain Spider said. "That's why you fainted."

I looked and saw Rainbow Dash beside me. "No, I wasn't. I was scared of the sword."

"You weren't?" Rainbow screamed into my face. "Traitor."

"No, wait," I said. "Yes, I was. I mean–"

"Explain it to the sharks," Captain Spider said.

I saluted at him from up the mast. "Yes, sir."

"No, Pinkie," Rainbow said. "You're not actually part of his crew."

"I'm not?" I said.

"You can't fool me," Captain Spider said. "Begone with you."

"Okay," I said. "Well, I tried. I was caught but it was for the wrong reason."

"Whatever," Rainbow said, glaring at me. "Whatever, Pinkie. Whatever."

"You want to sing a song about the sea?" I said. "You want to sing a shanty?"

"No," she said.

"Okay," I said. "I wonder when Twilight is coming back."

Then, I saw Twilight come flying, and she landed on the ship, and she lasered the ropes and hovered us down. Can you believe it? Twilight was coming to save us. Where had she been? She had been out exploring on the sea? I didn't even know.

"How are you, girls?" she said.

"I'm fine," I said, dusting myself off. "Now, let's kick some pirate booty."

Rainbow groaned, and then, she ran off toward Captain Spider and jumped him. "No," he said. Rainbow wrestled him, and then, she pulled off his wooden leg. He fell together on the floor. "You pulled off my leg."

Rainbow jumped on top of him. "Well, you make it sound so horrible when you put it like that, but you were going to feed us to the sharks, remember?"

"It's just an expression," he said. "I wasn't really going to do it."

Rainbow tossed around on top of him. "Well, what am I supposed to believe?"

Twilight, landing, just gathered all the pirates with her magical aura and tied them with their own ropes.

"There," Twilight said.

"Wow," I said. "That's great. Thank you for saving us, Twi."

"Yes," Twilight said. "Now, what's going on here? Who are these guys?"

"I don't know," I honestly said, because I honestly didn't. Who were these guys? I didn't even know. "Who?" I said, looking toward them.

"I'm Captain Spider," Captain Spider said, being tied inside a bundle with the rest of the pirates, in a big chunk, just like that. "Don't you remember my song? I had a huge intro."

"Yeah," I said. "But like, what do you want?"

"What do I want?" Captain Spider said. "You stole my children."

A big swarm of spiders flashed in front of my eyes. "No way," I said. "I stole them? That's not really true."

"Yes, it is," Captain Spider said, "and I was going to have you lead me back to them. Now, I'll never get them back."

"They invaded my hair," I said, pointing at my scalp. "You can't be serious, Captain Spider."

"Where are they?" he said.

"If anyone should be able to answer that, it's Fluttershy." I turned around, got behind Fluttershy, and pushed her to the front of us, so she was in front of everybody.

"Um," Flutters said.

"C'mon," I said. "Spill the beans."

"I think they're back at my house still," she said. "I could take you there. It's no problem, if that's all you want. But they're safe. I'm not keeping them trapped there or anything like that."

"You see?" I said. "This has all just been a big misunderstanding. Don't you hate those?"

"Traitor," Jelly said, from inside her bonds.

"I'm a traitor, both to you, and to Rainbow Dash? Makes no sense," I said, laughing.

"No," she said. "You were supposed to be a pirate, Pinkie the pirate."

"I can still be a pirate, but I don't want you to trap my friends, if that's okay, Matey Jelly."

Matey Jelly stared and frowned. "But how are we going to find his children otherwise?"

"You could just talk to us," I said, very extremely confused by it all, the whole situation from A to Z, to other letters that don't even exist, like Ø and Ö. "What's even going on here?"

"No," she said. "We can't talk. We're pirates. If we tried to talk to you, you would just get scared and run away." She sobbed. "You don't even listen."

"Jeez, I'm sorry," I said. "Tell you what? I will try to listen more."

"Tell you what?" Rainbow said. "Don't be silly, Pinkie."

"What else am I supposed to do," I said, "when everything and everyone seem so silly."

"Whatever," Rainbow said. "Listen. Everyone, listen. I have an idea."

"Okay," I said. "I'm curious about what this idea is going to be. What is your idea, Rainbow Dash?"

She just looked at me.

"I really want to know your idea."

"Shut up," she said.

"Okay."

"Listen," she said.

"I'm listening."

"You're doing that on purpose," she said, pointing at me. "Can everyone hear that?"

Applejack sighed. "Not that it matters. Just get to the point already, Rainbow."

"You know what?" Rainbow said, crossing her arms, and sitting down. "I don't even want to do it anymore."

"Don't be childish," Applejack said.

Rainbow shot back. "I'm not being childish. Pinkie is being a tease."

"Whatever," Applejack said.

"I'm sorry," I said. I tried, at least.

"I don't even care," Rainbow said. "Ugh, okay. Fine. Listen, you all, ponies, out there, and spiders, spider, or whatever, and whatever. I don't even know what I'm saying. I forgot what I was going to say."

"Don't you hate it when that happens?" I said to Applejack.

Applejack stared angrily at me. "Yes, Pinkie. I do."

I smiled and laughed. "I'm just trying to lighten the mood. Heheh."

"Yeah," Applejack said. "Yeah, yeah, yeah."

"Anyway," I said.

"Can I jump into the conversation?" Twilight said, from the corner of my eyes.

I bit my lip. "Yes." I didn't say anything else. I didn't want anyone to get mad at me no more.

Twilight said, "I just want to say this. I know that this whole thing has been stressful, what with the changeling and all."

"Yes," I said. Rainbow looked at me. I got quiet.

"And," Twilight said, nodding her head toward Rainbow. "The gym situation."

"That was just confusing," Rainbow said.

"I've discovered something," Twilight then said, "and I think you would be interested to know, all of you."

I sharpened my ears for what she was about to say next, and everyone surrounded Twilight. Really, no one was ready for this.

"I think these pirates are hiding something, something important. I've been in their ship, exploring. I found it in the middle of the sea, drifting, but I never thought that they were on our ship, of all places, you know, so I'm sorry for that, and I shouldn't have abandoned you guys."

"Can't stay mad at you," I said.

"But," Rainbow said. "Are these pirates really just after the tiny spiders, or are they hiding something? Really, are they looking for some big treasure? Something seems fishy about this whole situation, Twi. What is it you were thinking about? What did you find?"

"I'm getting to it." Twilight took a few deep breaths, just sort of getting ready for what was to come next, I think, and so it was, I think. I think, anyway. She did. "I'm going to," Twilight said. "Okay, this is the deal," she then said. "I found something, something aboard the ship, the other ship. It was a map, and that map leads to something that I think is dangerous. It's a magical artifact, a trident. It can be used to gain power over the land and the seas, both. It's almost like they were looking for it strangely, but what do I know?" Twilight said, shrugging, sort of, I think. She was. She was, looking like, kind of, like she was unsure. "What do you think, Captain Spider?" she said, holding up something.

"I'm a pirate," he said. "What do you expect? Of course, I want to steal things, and the more valuable the booty, the better."

"I know of some valuable booties," I said, nudging Rainbow.

"Stop it," Rainbow said, looking serious. "Please, stop it, Pinkie."

I grinned at her, thinking about if I was going to keep pushing, but then, I decided against it.

"Really?" Captain Spider said. "Where is the booty?"

I burst out laughing. "No, stop it," I said. "No-hohoho."

"I don't get it," Captain Spider said.

"Just ignore her," Twilight said, shaking her head.

"Hey, Rainbow," I said. "You have the most valuable booty around. Your booty is–"

"Like, you're going way too far with this, Pinkie," Rainbow said. "This isn't even funny."

"Oh," I said. "So you're the decider of funny now. Hey, everyone. If Rainbow doesn't think it's funny, then that makes it not funny, you guys." I pointed at her, and that's kind of because I felt kind of hurt.

"Oh, shut up, Pinkie," Rainbow said. "Just shut up. Why do you have to be so obnoxious all the time? You're poorly behaved. You're like a kid. Whatever. Like, booties? Come on now. I'm Pinkie. I like booty. Hur-di-dur." Rainbow stuck out her tongue at me, and I didn't really know how to respond, and I thought a second later that maybe I deserved it.

"But I do- I don't know," I said, half-whispering, half-speaking. "I'm sorry."

"You're not even sorry," Rainbow said. "You're not serious. You're not serious enough to be sorry. Be sorry for real, for once."

"I have been sorry for real before," I said.

"Ah," Rainbow said, flicking her hoof in the air at me. "So you're admitting that you aren't being serious now?"

"I don't know," I said. "Maybe I am. I just want to stop arguing because it's making me feel bad."

"No," Rainbow said. "No, we need to sort this out, like now."

Twilight looked at us. I looked at her. "Hm," she said. "No, I really don't know." She turned to Captain Spider. "You do realize that the trident is the means by which the sea-ponies survive underwater."

"Isn't that the pearl of watchamago?" I said.

"No," Twilight said. "It's the pearl, gets its power from the trident, gets its power from the sea."

"Boy, I'm losing track of my magical doohickeys." I looked at Rainbow. She was still mad. "Okay," I said. "Maybe I could make it up to you."

"Are you going to say another joke now?" Rainbow said.

"No," I said. "No, not at all. No jokes."

Rainbow stared me right in the eye, and she looked very serious. "Then what did you have in mind, Pinkie Pie?" I don't think I've ever seen her so serious before. I must've really made her angry with my booty jokes.

"I'll show you."

"Step, one, you need an egg. Ready the eggs."

"Shouldn't you be the one baking, since you're supposed to make it up to me?"

I cracked an egg down into a little bowl, seeing the egg jump around in there. "No, no. I'm not sure. I think you will have more fun if you help me." Rainbow was about to leave. "No, wait. I'll do it. I'll bake everything. I can do it. Ha! I was only joking, you know. Aren't I silly? Hi!"

"Pinkie!" Rainbow said. "Just apologize."

"I'm sorry," I said, mixing the egg down, without putting anything else into the bowl. "I'll still bake for you though."

"Just chill," Rainbow said.

"I'm a chilling. I'm just chilling on a boat," I said, relaxing my body. The bowl flew up into my face. I must've touched it wrong, because I got egg in my hair. "Don't worry. We've got loads of eggs," I said, winking at Rainbow, and smiling. I just felt smiley. "This is going to be a great day."

Little did I know that weird things were going on, and those things wouldn't stop. Would they? I think they would, if they could, but they don't, and they won't. Captain Spider was making plans. He was going to steal the trident. Oh, no!

I poured some flour, in the now mostly empty bowl, not thinking about such things though, back then. "Nanana. Making please-forgive-me-cake for Rainbow Dash. Nanana!" I had a little tune going on. "Nana. Baking is great. It's better than late, evening's with cake, 'cause baking is great." I looked to see if Rainbow was still there, but no, she was gone. "Ah, well. Baking is still great. It's better than hate. I don't want to be late, baking this cake. Wo-hoo." No one was listening, but I wasn't exactly singing for the crowd. I was singing for myself, so I didn't bother. I didn't care. I did what I was going to do, and that was fine by me. That was all I cared about at the time, just baking, just relaxing, and just being myself.

Forsooth. That wasn't what was going to happen though, because other things were brewing, and it wasn't a cake. I'll tell you that much.

In a strange, twisty turn of events, I ended up here, on this boat, with these ponies, of all ponies. My friends. I'm happy to be with them. I care about them a lot, but of course I do. Don't you? Don't who? Everyone does, because these are some of the best ponies around, especially Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash deserves cake, and that's what I was making for her. I was making all sorts of cake, up and down, and that felt good. It felt right. It simply felt like what I wanted to do, and that's what makes the world go 'round.

"Oh, anyway, Rainbow. I want to make a cake for you. I wanted to. I wanted to, but what has happened now? I don't know. I'm just unsure." I looked around the place, inside the ship, chaotic and messy, tiny little room with baking supplies and appliances, looking for ingredients, searching with my eyes, and that's what happened, in a nutshell, which I was in, feeling like bursting, on that ship, in that day, and under those weird circumstances, of my day, you know, with everything that happened, and all.

"What a good day it is though," I said, feeling still like the day was good, and I was there with my friends, which I was really grateful for, and liked, a lot. A lot of things felt great, and that's exactly what I wanted. It's exactly what I needed. I needed a lot of things in that day. I needed to think. I needed a lot of things. I needed focus. Did I have it? Um, not very much. No, sorry. No, siree, but that's what happened at least, and I still feel happy. No, felt. I felt happy, and then what happened?

"Pinkie!" someone called from out the ship.

I ran out the door. "Eggs!"

"Pinkie," Twilight said.

A giant jelly-fish, the size of a house, climbed on the ship.

"That's no good." I shook my head. Then, I went back inside the ship, because I didn't want to deal with that. I kept baking.

"Pinkie!" Twilight said.

I ran out the ship, and I had the cake with me. "Here," I said. The giant jelly-fish looked at me. Then, it bent down and ate the cake.

"Rawrgh," it said.

"You're welcome." I put the plate down on the ground, feeling a little woozy and all, you know, because this was unexpected. Then, the thing returned to its depths that it came from, and was gone. "Wow," I said. "Did you see that, Rainbow?"

"You know I don't like pies?" she said.

"But it was a cake," I said, protesting against her. "It was a cake."

"Yeah," Rainbow said.

"But don't worry." I booped her nose. "I'll make a new one."

"Don't you do that again," Rainbow said, clenching her hoof and waving it back and forth.

I was like, "Okay. Please don't punch me." Then, I ran back in the ship, and that was the end of that story.

Basically, I was trying to make Rainbow Dash forgive me. That's how I was going to spend the rest of the day.

"Hey, Rainbow," I said. It wasn't really Rainbow Dash. It was just dough shaped in the shape of Rainbow Dash with rainbow frosting on it. "What say you we go out in the sea and explore?"

"No, Pinkie," the dough said. "I don't want to do that. I will punch you now."

"Oh, please don't punch me, Rainbow," I said to the dough. "I'll act nicer than nice, and I'll do a lot of good things for you." The dough fell apart. "Nooo, I'm so sorry." I tried putting it together. "Nooo!"

"What's going on?"

"I killed Rainbow Dash."

Rainbow looked at me through a crack in the door. "Okay. Good luck with that."

She left. "Nooo."

She stuck her head back in. "Just come out. You're not good when you're alone, Pinkie."

"Nooo," I said, trying to put the dough back together. "She's dead."

Rainbow came in and pulled me away from the dough. "No, no. C'mon, Pinkie. Calm down."

"Rainbow," she said. "I'm sorry."

"Okay," she said. "Just come out. Don't be such a drama queen."

"Do you forgive me?" I said.

"No," she said. "I want you to stop being such a drama queen."

"Please forgive me."

"No, Pinkie," Rainbow said. "I might forgive you later. C'mon. I won't do it just because you told me to."

"But I'm sooo sad."

"Deal with it," she said. She pulled me out of the room, and out to the outside of the ship. "Here she is. She was making a sculpture of me using dough and talking to herself. Classic Pinkie."

"Okay," Twilight said. "We need to talk about something that's a little more important right now, forgive the interruption. Pinkie, we can deal with the thing with Rainbow Dash later."

"There's nothing to deal with," Rainbow said. "I got angry. That's all. It's not a switch. I can't just turn it on and off whenever I want to, Twilight."

"That's fine," Twilight said. "But we need to focus now. Important things are happening. Really important things are happening."

"I understand," I said. "So what's going on now, you guys?"

Twilight nodded. "This is the deal. I discovered, as you well know by now, a treasure map on the other ship. The pirates are leaving now. I tried taking the map. I thought I did, but I think it was a fake. We need to follow them and see where they're going, for if they get ahold of the object that the map supposedly leads to, then that could be real trouble, and bad trouble at that."

"Then show us the way, Twi," I said.

"We need to follow that cliff over there," she said, pointing into a cliff that was not far off in the distance. "And we need to take a left around it. It's the only way."

"Okay," I said. I jumped up to the steering-wheel of the ship.

"Yeah," Rainbow said. "If we want to crash the ship, then giving it to Pinkie would be a good idea, girls."

"Rainbow!" Applejack said. "You're still that upset over the booty-joke. Just calm down already. You calling her a drama queen?"

"Well," Rainbow said. "Well, well. Whoop-de-freaking-dooo."

"That's fine," Applejack said, "but to be honest, none of us really has the skill necessary to do this. That's why we need to cooperate as a team, not turn against one another, and be all crazy, and stuff."

"Whoop-de-wooping-tooting-doo," Rainbow said. "Whatever. I don't even care." She walked in the door of the ship, and she disappeared, without as much as a trace.

"I'm going left," I said, steering left, seeing the world around me change, and shift. Everything turned, but really, it was the boat turned, but it felt like everything around the boat turned, and we went forward, slowly, but not all that slowly, and the seagulls squawked, and I thought to myself, what a wonderful day, despite everything, and I had almost forgotten about Rainbow Dash at that point. I kept steering the boat, onward, and onward toward adventure, just keeping it up toward the winds, against the sea's mighty current, and I could go on.

"Good," Applejack said. "Really good."

We passed the cliff by, going around, and I wondered where to go next, and what a great weather-day for that day, of all the days that we could've gone out on a cruise. We chose a good one, I think.

"Now," Twilight said. "Keep going forward. Something should happen now, soon enough."

"What?"

Magic!

The ship went through a portal. That's at least what it looked like. I don't know if it was a portal, but I think so, and we just went on, and on, and on. It was a good journey, to be sure. It was a really good journey, and I liked it a lot, and then what happened?

I'm not even sure, but I think we got separated, and it is what it is, you know. It's like, just is that, and that's what it is. It's not something else. I just thought about Rainbow Dash, and how much I like her. Then, I walked around. I didn't even know where I was. When we got to the other side of the portal, something had thrown us off the ship. Don't you hate it when that happens?

"Dash!" I said, calling out for my friend. "Where are you, Dashie?"

She was gone. Everyone was gone. It was purple, and black. Those were the only colors I saw. I didn't even know where to look, or what to think, but I wanted things to work out good. I really did. I just went out and looked for Rainbow Dash. I love Rainbow Dash. I want everything to turn out well in the end, and I wanted it then too. I always want everything to turn out well in the end, because all's well that ends well, and that's fine by me. That's what I care about. That's great for me, and that's what I like, and what I want, and I want life to be good, for everyone.

Anyway, to the story. I was looking for Rainbow Dash, and then, I ran into a guy, who looked like he only had one eye. He was a pirate. Was he one of the ones from before? No, I didn't recognize him at all.

"Hello," I said, happy to see a face, any face, in this dark, purple place, that was really like another dimension, or something. "Who are you?"

"I'm Raviolius, the ravioli-pone," he said, like he was bored, and he just said it like that, you know, like in that sort of weird, I-don't-really-care, sort of way.

I laughed. "I forgot what ravioli even is."

He said, "If you don't know what it is, then you don't get to know what it is."

"That's crazy," I said. "Hey, why do you only have one eye? You need an eyepatch, buddy."

"I only need ravioli," he said.

"I'm looking for my friends. Do you know where they could be? Somewhere around here, I think."

The pony. His name was Raviolius, by the way. He was brown, and he had a bleak way about his character. He was sort of off, and sad-looking.

"Perhaps I have seen your friends," he said, doing a funny grimace.

I grimaced back at him. He pouted, and then, he looked at me, and he was looking sad.

"Perhaps I have not seen your friends. It depends on if you have any ravioli," he said.

"I don't," I said. "I'm sorry. I could make some for you, if I only had the ingredients, and the means to do so, but I don't. I'm sorry. You're asking too much there, buddy. I'm just looking for my friends."

"Perhaps we can help each other," he said, sort of sounding sort of raspy, and husky. "Perhaps you could make some for me, if I found the ingredients."

"But I don't know what it is," I said.

"No ravioli means no passage," he said, and his body was fading. He looked like he was turning into smog.

"No, wait!" I said. "I can do it. I can do it. Wait. Let me. I promise you that I can."

"Then do it," he said.

In the middle of this weird, purple, and black dimension of weird colors, a table appeared, and an oven, and ingredients.

He closed his eyes, and did a grimace. He almost looked like he was hurting or something. "Do it now. I give you ten minutes."

"Okay," I said, walking to the ingredients. I had to put two and two together now, if I wanted to see my friends again. "Okay, so what's this?" I picked a thing up. I put it into a bowl. "Am I doing it right?" I said.

"You will make ravioli, or you won't," the guy said. That wasn't very helpful, but what can you do?

I started making, and I hoped for the best. After ten minutes had passed, or maybe it was five minutes. It felt really much shorter than ten minutes, but whatever. It was what it was. He tasted it.

"This isn't ravioli," he said.

"No!" I said. "It totally is. Just look at it. All ravioli-like. It's the most ravioli ravioli I have ever seen in my ravioli days."

"No ravioli," he said. "No passage. I need ravioli."

"Why ravioli?" I said. "Why not something else? Have you tried anything other than ravioli?"

"No," he said. "I've only ever eaten ravioli."

"Well then," I said. "There's the problem. You need something other than ravioli."

"No," he said. "I need ravioli." He looked really, really sad now. "Never again in all my days will I see ravioli."

"What?" I said.

He was crying now, almost, like a little, it looked like, but I didn't know how to make ravioli, so what was I supposed to do? It was ridiculous. I had to find a way to solve this, somehow, and fast, and quick, really quick. Posthaaaste. Then, I got an idea. Maybe I could make something else, if the ingredients didn't disappear, and make it so good that he would have to like it, and forget about the ravioli, but what was I going to make? I didn't even know. I had to think about it for a second. Then, I got a shining, brilliant idea. I ran to the ingredients, fast, and put stuff together. Then, I gave something to him.

"Try it."

"No," he said, turning his face away, and closing his eyes, like a child, that doesn't want to eat its spinach, but I was really going to push on him.

I said, "C'mooon, why not?"

"No, I have waited a hundred years to eat my ravioli, and that's what's going to happen, so no, I want nothing else but ravioli."

I said to him, "If you haven't eaten in a hundred years, you must be really hungry, and how do you even know if ravioli is something for you anymore? Maybe you have changed so much that you don't like ravioli anymore. You never know. It's a hundred years we're talking about here."

"Okay," he said. He tasted it. "That's really good," he said. "What's this?" He grabbed his empty eye, and then, he pulled something out. It was a trident. "Thank you. I was so dead set on eating ravioli that I couldn't see the truth. I was blinded by my own will to do something, rather than just doing it because I knew that I wanted to do it, out of knowledge about the thing itself, but now, I understand that it wasn't a love for ravioli that made me want to eat it so much. It was stubbornness. Thank you, Pinkie."

"Hey, I never told you my name." He disappeared, and I was left confused, and I picked up the trident. "Hm, what do you do with a trident?" I said. "I see. You catch fish. Now, I remember. That's great. I will catch loads of fish, using this great and beautiful trident. But first, I have to find my friends? Where could they be?"

"Pinkiiie. Pinkiiie."

I spit water out my mouth.

"Pinkie!"

"Rainbow Dash," I said, seeing a rainbow above me. "Am I forgiven now?"

"Pinkie," she said. "Yes, I forgive you. Holy jiminy crickets. You could've drowned. What were you doing?"

"I got the trident."

"She's speaking gibberish," Rainbow said to someone else. I was down, looking up, so I couldn't see who she was talking to.

"No," I said. I stuffed my hoof into my hair, and slowly, I got out the trident. "Look. Look." I spit some more water out my mouth, and then, I got a coughing fit. "Cough, cough," I said, all coughing, and feeling weird, and with water all over me.

"Pinkie," Rainbow said. "How is that even possible?"

"Raviolius gave it to me."

Rainbow raised an eyebrow. "Did he really?"

"Yes."

"What do we do now?" Rainbow said.

"I don't know." I tried standing up, but I fell back down.

"You need to rest," Rainbow said. "Like, seriously."

"What happened?"

"You just jumped right into the water. What were you thinking?" Rainbow hugged me. "I kind of blame myself for it, to be completely honest with you, Pinkie."

"I understand," I said. "I understand. I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," Rainbow said.

I looked at her, smiling. "So what do we do now?"

"It's just one of those days, isn't it?" I said. I said it 'cause it's true. "Isn't it?" I said, and that's what I said. "Isn't it?" I said.

"Isn't it?" Rainbow Dash responded. "Isn't it? I think it is."

"Yes," I said. I was happy to see her again.

To have a good day is great, and to have a day that's better than good is better, but what's better than good? What about finding the magical trident, that we had been looking for? By chance? By luck? We found it, anyhow, and that is what matters. That's all.

"Now, what do we do?" I said. "Is the adventure over?"

"No way," Rainbow said. "It's time to explore."

"Okay."

We were going out to explore, and why not? Exploring is great, and it's so worth it to explore. We were going to find loads of great things on our exploration.

"How do we get that island fruit down?" Rainbow said. "It's one of the ancient questions."

"You fly up," I said, wondering what she was going to say next.

"Yes," Rainbow said. "But then again, maybe it isn't so simple."

"Please explain," I said.

"After all, the fruit is all the way up there, and we're down here, aren't we?"

"What?" I said.

"Pinkie," she said. "You get the fruit."

"But why me?"

She smiled at me, the way only she can. "To show that you're really sorry." She tried to hold back a laugh. I got it.

I ran up the tree, and then, I got the fruit, running back down. "There you go."

"How do you do that?" Rainbow said. "You have magical powers."

"No," I said. "I just like fruit, is all."

"Would any other earth pony be able to run up a tree that is at a ninety degree angle?"

"I don't know," I said. "Maybe not. That makes me unique then."

"I guess so," Rainbow said. "I guess so."

"Whatever the case may be, I still care. I know I do, in fact."

I realized a bunch of things that day?

"Yes!"

No, wait. I didn't say that out loud.

Yes, no, that's fine. I know. I'm getting side-tracked, but still, it was the greatest adventure ever.

I'm really not going to tell you why. I don't remember most of it. I wasn't there. I was unconscious.

Yeah, so, it's still true, but so be it, then. I was unconscious for hours. And that's when a bunch of exciting things happened for my friends. I love my friends. Who doesn't live their friends though? Everyone does, so there's nothing special about me. I'm not saying that at all.

Having friends is great. I like friends a lot, like a lot.

I also like pies, but Rainbow doesn't, and that's fine. Not everyone does. Pie wars are some of the best wars around. Butterflies are pretty, and butterflies, are very usually, I think at least, smaller than pies.

Are butterflies always smaller than pies? Is that true?

"I love boating, and I like boats. What?"

Bzz. Bzz. Bzz. Ho-hoho. Bzz. "I'm a bee."

"Who's a bee?"

"Everyone's a bee."

I buzzed, feeling happy, and then, I woke up.

Rainbow said, "Pinkie, you fell down a tree."

"No, I di-in't."

"I'm so sorry for making you go up that tree."

"Okay," I said, standing up. "So did the thing with the trident really happen, or what? What happened and what didn't happen?"

"What trident?"

"Oh, no," I said. "That part was also a dream."

"Kidding," Rainbow said. "The trident is on the ship. I still don't know how you did that."

"Phew," I said.

"Rounding up seashells is what I do, when I'm bored, and tired. Yeah-yeah." I sang, picking up a seashell.

"Hey," Rainbow said. "What do you remember right now?"

"I remember something about a tree, with papayas in it, or was it another tropical fruit?"

"Pinkie," Rainbow said. "You do know you've had holes in your memory ever since the thing happened, when I told you to go up the tree?"

"At least, I'm still happy. The memory things hasn't affected that, so it's all good."

"I just want you to be all right," Rainbow said. "Please."

"Okay," I said, smiling at her. "Okay then."

And so it was, and when my memory had come back, we were going home. "Wow," I said. "This sure was a good day."

"Day?"

"Week? Month?"

"Pinkie," Twilight said. "How much do you remember?"

"Like, a day," I said.

"We've been on the sea for three weeks," Twilight said. "We've honestly had a lot of fun with you, even though you don't remember any of it."

"It was the best adventure ever," Rainbow said. "And I've really gotten closer to you, Pinkie, since you got that brain damage."

"Rainbooow," Applejack said, sinking her face into the ground out of passive shame, coming off Rainbow.

"Whopa-doopa-doo," Rainbow said, shrugging.

"You're never going to pull off that catchphrase," Applejack said. "You just won't. The desert monkeys were wrong about you."

"The desert monkeys understand me," Rainbow said.

"What's the dessert monkey?" I said, feeling happy to be around my friends.

"It's a long story," Rainbow said. "I'll tell it to you one day, Pinkie. One day."

Stay tuned for the sequel to the best adventure ever, the best adventure ever – part 2, which will come out after the end of the main story. The pointillistic story of The Small of Life was given to you by Ponyville Friendship Publications, copyrighted by Twilight, and the evil changeling, who will get a share of the profits. No jellyfishes were harmed in the writing of this story, except for one, but she has forgiven the ones that did it, so it's all good.

By the way, yesterday, I ate a great sandwich. It was the best sandwich. I love sandwiches.

I also love cupcakes, and tricks.

The book, whose publishing, publishment, who was published I mean, one year ago now, has undergone the following changes. It has had this part added to it. It also has a better cover, with prettier pictures. Yes, you heard me. Prettier pictures. You just have to find them, because they were all scattered on its way to the book store.

"Hey," Rainbow said. "What are you doing, Pinkie?"

"I'm simply telling my story, the way it really happened. What's the problem?"

"What the heck? This is totally backward. That's not how you write that?"

"Write what?"

I'm simply retelling the story the way it happened. That's all I'm doing.

"But you're doing it wrong. Give me the book. In this book, it says that Twilight spoke to you. She didn't."

"Twilight," I said, "said what?"

Rainbow Dash looked around. "Who are you talking to?"

She said, "I don't know what do about this, since you don't even remember much of what happened. You were unconscious, so maybe, Rainbow Dash should continue telling the story." And this happened in the map-room of Twilight's castle, as you were telling the story, Pinkie. You were telling the story, back then.

"Now, I'm talking to you," I said.

"Yes, that is true," Rainbow said. "It is true that you are talking to me right now, and that the last part was in the past."

"Yes," I said.

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"What will happen next?" Twilight said. "Whose turn is it?"

"That never happened," Rainbow said, now in the future.

I laughed. "You're funny."

"No, that seriously never happened."

Twilight said, "You don't remember much of what happened."

"No, she didn't!" Rainbow said.

Okay, so the explanation, Twilight's solution, and my solution, Pinkie's solution, that is, don't explain a lot of what happened like why everyone has different memories, and that's actually confusing.

"Also," Rainbow said. "Ponyville Friendship Publications is not a real publishing company, Pinkie!"

"Whoops," I said, shrugging.

"Whatever, Pinkie."

"Whoops."

"There are no prettier pictures. There was only ever the picture of the rainbow."

"Whoops."

"Why are we publishing this book with what happened the last time, when we published the friendship book."

"I don't know," I said. "I'm Pinkie. I don't know."

"Shut up, Pinkie," Rainbow said, though somewhat playfully.

"The book," I said.

"What about it?"

"What happened next?"

Pinkie and Twilight and others were in Twilight's castle's map room, again! They were there again, and Pinkie was telling the story. This is what it says in the book, just to be clear, what I'm writing right now.

Pinkie said, "I will keep telling the story right now." And she did.

She stood there beside Twilight, telling the story, and she was really going at it, telling this story.

"Did you just switch to the third person?" Twilight said.

"Yes," I said.

Back in the future. "I swear that never happened, Pinkie."

"Yeah," I said, "but I need to make it clear to the reader what's going on. Who knows what will happen if I don't? You're damned if you do, and you're damned if you don't, Rainbow Dash, dashing."

"Yeah, but that's stupid," Rainbow said. "You don't have to change what happened."

"Then what really happened?" I said, ready to write more.

"Well, this is what happened," Rainbow said, about to tell me what happened.

We were going about our business inside that room, and nothing was going like you said it. I was just trying to listen, and Twilight was off who knows where, just maybe interrogating the changeling guy or whatever, but look, if you want to tell the story, that's fine. Just don't change anything, Pinkie, when you're writing it down.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"That's okay," Rainbow said.

Where is the rest of the story then?

Spike burped.

"No," I said. "It got on the page. No. That's bad. That's really bad."

A letter came out his mouth, and the page burned up, so ruining the last of the story that we had written down, and making it so that I had to rewrite it.

"Hey," Rainbow said. "Have you been writing down the entire conversation we've been having about your writing, Pinkie?" This is the future, just to be super, ultra clear.

"Yes," I said.

This is the past. "Spike. We will have to rewrite it."

Spike said, "Uh-oh."

This is even farther into the past.

I lay on the ship, just being lazy, and we were going home. We had learned a bunch of great stuff. I had learned that I have my limits, and that I shouldn't insult Rainbow Dash, or whatever I did to her. I couldn't even remember myself, but I had been knocked out flush, so can you blame me?

What a frantic life, and the life is great, even though it is that.

Still, I didn't want to forget anything. I wanted it all to be good. I did. I did want it to be good. I did too. Twilight said that I had gotten memory loss, from hitting my head, but stuff happens.

Yeah, I really did feel fine. There's no second part where I feel bad about what happened. I know how to deal with this stuff.

"Twi, that's a pretty name. Twi, that's a pretty name, the prettiest name," I said, complimenting Twilight.

"Thank you," Twilight said. "Not that I was the one who chose it, but thank you."

"Happy. You're welcome. Charmed." I bowed down to her.

"Yes," she said. "Now, let's go home."

"Before that," I said. "Let's play a game."

If it comes as a surprise that I like games, then I don't know what you're surprised about. We had spent weeks out at sea, and yeah, seriously, I couldn't remember most of it, but it was all good, anyway. It felt great. It felt good, and gooder, and great, and better than great. It felt the greatest. Now, we were going to play one good game for the ages.

"On this ship," I said, speaking in front of everyone. "On this here ship, I have built an obstacle course, and it's the best obstacle course. The best."

Rainbow leaned into Twilight. "You sure she's recovered?"

"Knock it off," she said. "She's just being Pinkie."

"I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Jeez," Rainbow said. "Get a grip. Relax, guys."

"I'm doing this course in honor of the great, beautiful Rainbow Dash," I said. "Beautiful!"

"Yeah, thanks," Rainbow said, blushing.

"And," I said. "It's time. The first part is the part with the hula-hoops. You have to brave the hula-hoops, and defeat them, and jump inside them, not outside, and if you land outside, those are minus points. The second part is the part with the rope-swing jumps. You have to swing in the rope, up on the mast, and land on the other side. The crow's nest has all the ropes, you guys. No flying, because that's minus points. The third part is the part with the flesh-eating sharks. You have to walk the plank, and then, do a really good trick jump thing into the water, and the one with the best jump of all the jumps win. Begin." I shot my party cannon.

"What was that last part?" Rainbow said. Applejack took off. "Oh, forget it."

Essentially, adventure-time is a time when adventure happens, and if that's how you define these words, then an adventure definitely was a-brewing. Rainbow Dash ran across the hoops, swung the ropes, and dived into the water. I couldn't figure out who won the competition. It's not as if I was keeping tabs, but I think that since Rainbow Dash and Applejack were the only ones that made it to the end of the course, Twilight not participating, Rarity giving up after the hoops, Fluttershy being too Fluttershy to climb up into the crow's nest, and me being the judge, they were equally winners. Rainbow Dash didn't like that very much though, and neither did Applejack, bless their hearts.

"We can't both be winners, darn you," Applejack said, swinging her hoof up and down.

"Aren't you happy just that we're together?" I said, making a little plea.

Rainbow Dash and Applejack looked at each other. "No!"

"Okay, then let's try again. I wasn't keeping tabs that first time. I wasn't making- looking sure that the time was right." I smiled against my own will, but those two certainly weren't amused.

"Let's go it again," Applejack said. "One more time. And this time, you're keeping tabs, Pinkie."

"Fine," I said.

I picked up a microphone I had found. "Get readyyy. Three, two." Rainbow took off. "One. Go!"

"Frick," Applejack said, and ran after.

Rainbow danced across the hoops, one by one, going past them. She was like a swan, but even more beautiful than that. Rainbow jumped, and danced. Applejack was more angry-looking. She sprinted across them. Well, she got bonus points for trying at least. Applejack reached the ladder to the crow's nest. Rainbow Dash was already halfway up. She began climbing, and caught up to Rainbow. Rainbow kicked at her, and Applejack grabbed her tail, pulling her down. Rainbow fell and then, caught flight.

"Hey!" Applejack said. "That's against the rules."

"Do you want me to die?" Rainbow said. Then Rainbow flew up, and flew past her.

"No, I don't. At least I don't think. Get over here." Applejack jumped up to the rope. Just as Rainbow was about to swing down from the crow's nest, Applejack caught the rope in her mouth, trying to yank at it, but she was pulled down along with Rainbow Dash. They both soared through the air.

"Aaah," they screamed, and then Rainbow landed, and Applejack landed on her back, standing on her hindlegs.

"Don't steal my thunder," Rainbow said, kicking her off, and running toward the plank.

Applejack looked around, and she saw a, well, a saw, and she grabbed it, and just as Rainbow was walking out, preparing to jump, she sawed the plank, and it fell right off, Rainbow along with it, into the water, splash! Applejack just jumped off the edge of the ship. I threw down a rope-ladder to both of them, that I had found on the floor before the competition. Applejack climbed up, but Rainbow flew past her, and kicked the rope-ladder, making it fall down into the water.

"Nooo," Applejack yelled, as she fell down into the water.

Rainbow pumped her hoof. "I won, again. Easy!"

"Wow," I said. "You come first, but you also flew, so that's one minus point."

"One minus point?" Rainbow said, with horror in her face.

"Yes, that makes you, um, even, I think," I said, quickly trying to work it out in my head.

"How does that make us even? I totally beat her. She sawed off the plank. She kicked me."

"I think it should clearly be at least one minus point for sawing off the plank," I said, "but kicking wasn't against the rules."

"What? That's dumb. That's dumb-dumb," Rainbow said, frowning and looking around angrily. "Whaaat?"

"Hey." I looked past her. "Where's Applejack by the way?"

"She's probably getting eaten by sharks. Serves her right," Rainbow said. A rope flew around Rainbow's body. She sighed. She flew off in the other direction, and into the water.

"This got dirty quiiick," I said, feeling surprised. "I guess the one that got the least amount of minus points is the winner. Though I should start Rainbow off with one plus point, since she finished first, I think at least."

"O-hoy," Twilight said, coming out the ship. "What's going on out here?"

"Rainbow Dash, and Applejack, are, how should we say, fighting to the death in the water," I said, pointing toward the water. Twilight walked over there.

"And you–"

"But I didn't–"

"And–"

They argued in the water, pulling each other's hair. Twilight picked them up. "I wish I could say I was surprised, but as a matter of fact, I'm not," Twilight said, looking uncomfortable.

"She cheated," they both said.

"Did they?" Twilight said, looking at me.

"No," I said. "No, I mean yes. They both cheated like a dozen times each. I will need a math genius to figure out how many minus points."

"Okay," Twilight said.

"What's going on?" Twilight said. "What's happening out on the seas? The wild wild seas?"

"Nothing much," I said. "Do you have the math done yet?"

"One minus for kicking Applejack. One minus for flying. One minus for pulling Applejack's tail. One minus for pulling Rainbow's tail. That's for Applejack. One minus for yanking the rope in stage two of the competition. Also Applejack. Applejack gets a minus point for sawing the board in stage three. Rainbow gets a minus point for flying again, and kicking the rope-ladder down. Applejack gets one extra minus point for pulling Rainbow back into the water. That's four each. Also, Rainbow Dash, flew twice, in two stages of the competition. Do we want to give her an extra minus point for that? It depends on how you count it?"

"Thank you, Twi," I said. "Your services are no longer needed."

"You said they both yanked the other's tail one time each?" Twilight said, while being pushed away back into the ship by me.

"I believe so. It all sort of blends together. Your services are no longer needed." Twilight disappeared into the ship, and I pushed out Applejack and Rainbow, one by one.

"Who won? Who won?" Rainbow said.

"It's true that I cheated," Applejack said, "but in my defense, she started it." She pointed at Rainbow Dash. "Didn't you, jerk?"

"Well, I'd never," Rainbow said, grinning.

"I didn't exactly know what to make of it," I said, "but now, Twilight said that it's minus four each, so I guess I have to believe her."

"That makes me the winner," Rainbow said. "Since you said I would get one plus point."

"No, wait," I said. "You started before I had said, go. I totally forgot. That makes you even."

"You can't be serious?" Applejack said. "You can't seriously mean that, can you?"

"I dunno," I said, shrugging.

"We have to do it again," Applejack said.

Applejack, who was bandaged, stood beside Rainbow Dash, who was in a wheelchair.

"Who won?" Rainbow said.

"I don't know," I said. "What? You think I care about who wins? I want us all to make up and be friends."

"Huh? What's that?" Applejack said, trying to hear through the bandage that was wrapped around her head.

"I swear," Rainbow said, "I will take this wheelchair and turn it around, and go up crow's nest, if it kills me, until I know who won this stupid game we're playing."

"Okay," I said. "That's fine by me."

Rainbow rolled over the hula-hoops, and then over to the crow's nest, where she nudged and budged against the ladder, trying to pull herself up, along with the wheelchair.

"I'm just happy," I said.

Applejack looked at her, Rainbow Dash. She stumbled over to the ladder, and tried to push Rainbow to the side.

Twilight stood beside me. "You know this is never going to end until you declare a winner, right?"

"I don't know," I said.

"I'll be the judge this time," Twilight said. "Are you okay with that?"

"Yes," I said, patting Twilight on the nose. "I love your nose, by the way."

Since Rainbow was unable to finish the game, since she was in a wheelchair, Applejack won, which I was okay with, but Rainbow wasn't okay with it. She thought it was unfair, since Applejack didn't have to use a wheelchair. I thought that it wasn't over yet, and those two would settle the score later, but not now. Now, it was time to go home, and for them both to heal.

Twilight said that they had been on an adventure on an island, but I was unconscious for much of it, not that it had anything to do with the rest with what happened to the changeling, and everything. It didn't matter much who told the story, but we also all decided that we would write down what happened in the part of the adventure where I was unconscious later.

Rainbow Dash forgave me, at least I think so. Rarity and Fluttershy was doing something else on the journey. We'll get to them later, give them some love! Applejack was being Applejack, always talking about responsibility and stuff. Twilight was still confused about what had happened with the changeling-thing, and we were all just hanging out and having a great day.

It was good to be alive. But we didn't realize what would happen next. No one did, and the adventure still isn't over, or what to call it. It's a little bit of everything. It's what I enjoy most about life, just a little bit unpredictable.

Interlude over!

"Okay," Twilight said, as Spike got done writing. "Interlude over, indeed, Pinkie. Wow."

"It'll be my turn next to explain what happened at the island," Rainbow said.

"Yes," Twilight said. "You all feeling good right now?"

"Yes," I said.

"I think so," Fluttershy said, "but why- I mean, what did we write it down for? It doesn't seem to have anything to do with the other things that happened."

"You can never be sure," Twilight said. "You can never be sure."

"And that's the end of that story!" I said.

Rainbow laughed. "Like, you say things that sound as if they mean something, Pinkie, but probably don't."

"Yeah," I said. "It's a beautiful day. Does anyone feel like going out and continuing the events of this story someplace else?"

"What the heck!" Rainbow said. "That's exactly what I mean. Does anyone else hear it? Like, it's driving me nuts."

All's well that ends well.

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