• Published 1st Sep 2012
  • 6,497 Views, 116 Comments

My Little Pony: Masks are Magic - Wuten

After being forced into being a mask salesman, how will Anonymous cope with the new world he's in?

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Chapter 1

Chapter 1

“Why hello there! I’m the Happy Mask Salesman, and I sell masks all over the world.”

“Why would I have any use for a mask? Seems a bit fishy to me.”

“Oh, my. Do I seem shady? Suspicious? I bring happiness, trust me,” the mysterious man says, the grin never leaving his face, his red hair combed neatly to each side of his head, parted through the middle.

You are Anonymous, and you’ve been wandering this strange land for a long time.

“Perhaps instead of buying a mask then, you would like to become a seller of masks as well? Oh, wonderful, my own little apprentice mask salesman!”

“Look, I’m not interested in your strange little masks. Now if you would please leave me alone, I’m not interested.”

“Oh, come now,” the salesman chuckles, taking out a mask and putting it on. “Selling masks is like selling happiness to others! See? This little one looks happy, doesn’t he?” he says, pointing to the mask on his face.

It was a strange-looking mask, like a yellow fox of some kind.

“Not interested.”

”But why would you deny happiness to others? After all, these are no ordinary masks,” he says, taking out another one, this time some kind of rabbit ears. “For example, this one has magical properties that lets the wearer run very fast, see?” he chuckles, zipping a quick lap around you.

“Why would I be interested in selling these masks? Why don’t you?”

“Well, that’s where the problem lies,” the salesman rubs his hands together. “While I do enjoy selling masks, I am a very busy man. So in a few days time, I will need to leave this place, and the happiness that I will be able to bring can only go so far…”

He places his hands on your shoulders. “But that’s where you come in, my boy! You can carry on my philosophy and sell the masks in my stead!”

You sigh. “Fine. If it’ll get you to stop bugging me about it, I’ll sell one.”

“Splendid! I have your first mask right here,” he says, taking off the yellow fox’s mask, and handing it to you. “This is called the ‘Keaton Mask’. I’m sure you will bring great happiness to whoever you sell it to,” he says, once again the grin never disappearing.

“Fine,” you groan, taking the mask and looking at it, walking away.

“I will be here when you get back,” the salesman says, waving. “Have faith, Anonymous…”

You quickly turn around, and he’s gone.

“…How did he know my name?”

You’re a bit disheartened by this; but you continue moving, until you reach a sign with a town on the horizon. “…Ponyville…?” You walk down the trail, until you enter the outskirts of the town. It seems fairly rural as far as towns you’ve seen before.

Unfortunately, as you walk through the town, it’s completely deserted. “Huh… wonder where everyone is?”

You suddenly hear the pitter-patter of small feet scurrying across terrain, before the slam of a door.

You turn to the sound, but nothing is there. “This is… weird…” You continue walking through the city, to the town square.

“What do you think it is?” a pink, curly-haired pony asks, turning to a purple pony with a pink highlight through its hair.

“I’m not entirely sure, Pinkie,” the purple pony replies; she is a unicorn, and the horn on her head gives off a faint glow, closing the curtain they were looking through.

“Ah reckon he’s from far away. R’member Zecora and how everyp0ny acted when she came ta town?” an orange pony with her mane and tail tied back into ponytails (no pun intended) says, eyeing the strange creature from a crack in the curtain.

“Well, I have to say, his taste in clothing is rather… bland,” a white unicorn with curled, purple hair sighs, “I mean, really? A plain-white shirt and… and…” she trails off, before quickly looking back to the crack in the curtain with the orange pony, “What IS that material he has on his lower half? I simply MUST know!”

“Um… are you sure that’s such a good idea?” a yellow pegasus with long, flowing pink hair asks a bit timidly, her wings folding to her sides. “What if he’s… dangerous?”

“Ah, I could take him!” a blue pegasus grins, flexing her hooves in the air while floating with the help of her wings.

“Alright, I have a plan…” the purple unicorn looks to the other five ponies, gathering them around…

Where the hell is everyone?

“Hello? Anyone out there?” you call out to the empty town, turning to look for any sign of movement. After a few minutes, you give up and walk over to what you believe is the town hall, sitting on the step and taking out the fox mask from earlier. “Huh… wonder what that salesman saw in me that would make me do his dirty work for him…?”

You groan in frustration, glaring at the mask.

It almost looks like it’s smiling back at you.

Just like that “Happy Mask Salesman” did.

You grunt in anger, before throwing the mask as far as your arm could sling it. It lands with a loud *clank*, and jumps a few times before landing face-up on the ground around 10 meters from you.

You close your eyes and lean back, staring up at the sky. Hm… it’s a clear sky today…


You have no idea how it happened, but all of a sudden you dozed off, and now it’s pouring rain.

What’s worse, the mask you threw is gone. You didn’t even hear footsteps or anything.

Now you’re standing under the overlaying roof of the town hall, with no mask, and your clothes are completely soaked.

This day is just going PERFECTLY…

You curse out the salesman for making you do this.

…Wait a minute, he’s not making you do anything!

“Hah! That’s it; I’ll just not sell any masks. He can’t make me, especially in this barren town. There’s not even anyone here!”

“I beg to differ.”

You nearly jump out of your skin when you turn around and see, lo and behold, the Happy Mask Salesman.

“What the- when the hell did you get here?!”

“I’ve been here, you just never bothered to look in this direction,” he says, and still the grin never leaves his face.

“Well, what are you doing here?”

“I see that you do not have the mask that I gave you,” he says, holding out his hand. “Which obviously would mean that you’ve already sold it! Now, may I have the payment you received for it? You may keep a 35-percent sum as payment for selling it.”

Your eyes widen; you don’t have any money! “Um… well…”

“Hm? What’s the matter?” the salesman looks up to your face. “You… did get a payment, didn’t you?”


For the first time, you see him open his eyes.

And it’s not the face you want to see. It’s as if he’s angry, but he can never change his mouth’s expression. He places his hands on your shoulders. “Now… the first part of becoming a salesman is being able to get payment out of your buyer, Anonymous,” he says, your eyes locking in a deadlock stare.

…Holy shit, it’s like he’s piercing right through you…

“Now, go on and get that payment, Anonymous,” he says.

“Well, um… how much should I charge?”

“That, my dear boy, is completely up to you!” the salesman’s happy expression returns once again, patting your shoulders. “Part of being the salesman is being able to barter and compromise with your buyer for a price you can both agree on!”

You sigh.

“Alright, fine; as soon as this rain stops, I’ll go out looking for it.”

“Oh, but by then who knows where the mask could have gone off to?” he says, standing up and hoisting the huge pack of masks onto his back. “You should start looking quickly, otherwise the mask will be lost forever… and nobody will be happy,” he says, before walking off, in the rain, around the corner and out of sight.

“Wait, what?”

You quickly dash off around the corner, only to see…

“He’s gone. Again.” You’re completely soaked all over again. “…Shit.”

You walk back under the town hall, and peer out from under the overhanging ceiling at the sky.

Looks like the rain’s starting to let up now, you can head out without getting too wet. Except… you have no idea where to start looking. As the sky starts to clear, you see a silhouette moving in the shadow of one of the buildings, before quickly scurrying off.

“W-wait, hey!”

You hurry off towards the silhouette, only to come up to empty air by the time you get there.

You look around; there’s a door right there. Well, might as well knock, huh? You walk up to it, and quietly knock with the tips of your fingers three times.

You put your ear to the door, and you can hear faint whispering on the other side.

“Excuse me? Um… I’m looking for something I lost. It was a yellow mask, with big fox ears on it.” You step back as you speak, and you can hear the shuffling of feet around behind the door.

“Who are you, and why have you come here?” a female’s voice asks.

“Finally, someone… well, I’m not entirely sure why I’m here, but my name is Anon-”

“Then why don’t you just… go? Just go and don’t come back!” the voice exclaims, and you hear feet shuffling away.

“Wait, but-… Why are you all so afraid of me?!” You walk up to the door, and knock on it once again. “Please, I just want answers… I’m not here to hurt anyone, I promise…”

You hear faint whispering once again, and then the voice calls to you once again. “You promise that you’re not here to hurt us?”

Finally, you’re getting somewhere.

“Yes, yes a thousand times, yes!”

You exclaim, a smile curling on your face for the first time since arriving.

The door slowly opens…

…To a strange, plum-colored creature with mulberry hair. It…


“Well, if you’re trying to-”

Her words fall on deaf ears. You’ve fainted from shock.