Chapter 5: Tour of ponyville, Pinkie and the Brain, and a whole lot of giggles.
*Nicholas POV*
It had been two days since I had appeared in this world. Until I believed I was ready to go into town, I had decided to bunker down at Fluttershys. She had no problem with this, even though every time I went to help around the house, she would try to stop me from doing so. I would end up doing it anyway. I mean, she was literally taking care of me. It only made since to do my part around here. In fact, that's what i found myself doing that fateful monday when i decided to man up and hit the town.
I was cleaning some of the animal bowls that Fluttershy would use to feed her animal friends when I heard multiple knocks at the door.
"I'll get it!" I called out to Fluttershy, knowing that crazy knocking could only belong to 3 girls I knew.
However, as I opened the door, there was some purple pony at the door. She was currently reading a book which was floating in front of her face.
Must be a unicorn. I thought to myself, recalling what fluttershy had taught me about the three types of ponies that lived here.
The unicorn spoke up. "Fluttershy, I need your help with something back at the library. Some squirrels have invaded and wont leave at...." She trailed off as she lowered the book and looked at me.
"Umm.... are you ok?" I asked as a look of shock mixed with a huge grin slowly came on her face.
"YOUR A HUMAN!!!" The pony yelled, causing me to fall back with suprise. I quickly got up and slammed the door in her face.
"What kind of wacko was that?" I said as Fluttershy came downstairs quickly.
"Who was at the door?" she said quietly. but before I could answer a pop sounded off in the room and the pony from outside was now next to Fluttershy.
"I cant believe I found you already! Its only been two days since I got the princess's letter to be on the lookout for a human, but I didn't expect to find you so fast!" The pony said with great enthusiasm.
Wait? the princess of this world knows I'm here? I thought, the idea of royalty having a lookout for me scared me a bit.
Thankfully, Fluttershy intervened. "Please calm down, Twilight. Your scaring Nicholas." After hearing that, Twilight looked at my shocked expression and lowered her head with her ears bent down.
Taking a deep breath, I went over to her and kneeled in front of her. "Hey, its alright." I said softly. "I can totally understand you being excited to see me. But please dont scare me like that again, Ok?" She looked up at me and smiled
"Ok. sorry about that. I just get so excited when I see something new, I just tend to lose myself a bit." She said with a bit of an embarrassed blush on her face.
I chuckled at that. "Lets start over, shall we? I'm Nicholas, nice to meet you." I put out my hand
She looked at it for a second, confused. Then realization dawned on her face and she put her hoof out, shaking my hand. "I'm Twilight Sparkle." She said. She then looked at Fluttershy. "So, he's been here this whole time?" Fluttershy nodded as I spoke up.
"You might want to sit down, this will take a second to explain." I said as she took a seat on the couch, followed by Fluttershy as I stayed standing to tell my story.
************
A few hours later.
************
"So you have been staying here ever since you arrived in Equestria?" Twilight asked me as I finished.
I nodded. "Yup, I've been helping around the house to make up for Fluttershy putting a roof over my head." Fluttershy hid in her mane a bit at that.
"Well that's really sweet of you, Nicholas." Twilight said with a smile.
"Please, just call me Nick. Nicholas is such a mouthful sometimes." I said as she nodded in response. "I do have a question though. how did you know I was a human?"
Her grin got bigger at that. "Two days ago, I got a letter from the princess stating that a bipedal being known as a human had been found in her room. After spending a day with him, she learned that human had two brothers that might have appeared as well. So she told me to be on the lookout out for a smaller one and a really bulky looking one." I looked at her with a mixed face of shock and glee.
"So my brothers are here after all!" I said happily. "Since you were told to look for a bulky man, Im geussing Ronin hasn't been found. That means Raiden has been with the princess this whole time?!" I said incredulously.
She smiled. "Yup, and now that I've found you, I can send a letter to the princess informing her that one of the humans have been found! She said that she would be able to come down in a weeks time after I sent the letter once I found you." I was starting to get really giddy about all this.
"I can't wait to see Raiden again!" I cheered. Twilight cleared her throat to catch my attention.
"For the time being though, what are we going to do about you?" She asked. I looked her with a raised eyebrow.
"What about me?" I asked.
"Well, you are a child. and by our colt laws. You not only have to have a designated guardian, but you'll have to attend school as well." She said as my jaw dropped. The guardian thing was one thing, but school? Here?
"You mean I have to go to some random school who knows where?" I asked, getting a bit worried. Fluttershy shook her head.
"We have a school here for fillies and colts that I think you would like." She said.
"But who's going to look after him?" Twilight asked. Fluttershy turned to her.
"I will." She said and we both looked her with suprise.
"Really?" I said, unable to believe what she had said.
"I couldn't bear to see you get put in some random home somewhere, that is, if you dont..." She didn't get a chance to finish as I hugged her.
"Thank you." I said quietly, tears welling up in my eyes. I pulled back and wiped them as I noticed Fluttershy had some in her eyes as well.
"Aww, that's so sweet." Twilight said as she looked on. "Now that we have that decided, We will have to visit the mayor and inform her if this to have it finalized on paper." I rolled my eyes at that.
"Ugh! paperworks the worst." I groaned as the two mares giggled at that.
"I guess we could show you around town first." Twilight said. Fluttershy looked at me.
"Would you be ok with doing that?" She said in a motherly tone. I nodded.
"Yeah, lets do it!" I said as we walked out the door towards ponyville.
********
As we walked into town, I couldn't help but notice the stares I was getting from a lot of the ponies. They didn't seem scared, though, Just curious of who and what I was. Bet they would've been much more scared if it was Ronin being escorted down this street. I thought, laughing at the idea of him chasing ponies around with his sword.
"Whats so funny?" Twilight asked me as we approached what looked like a bakery.
"Nothing, just thinking about how my brother would've handled being here." I said, suddenly missing him greatly.
Fluttershy noticed this and spoke up. "Dont worry, Nick. The princess will find him. Then you can all be reunited." I looked at her and smiled.
"Speaking of funny, I should warn you. The pony your about to meet can be a bit... eccentric." Twilight said. I frowned at that. But before I could say anything, a wall of pink floof blocked my vision.
"OMYGOSHOMYGOSHIVENEVERSEENSOMEPONYLIKEYOUINTOWNBEFORE!YOUMUSTBENEW!!!!MYNAMEISPINKIEPIE!ICANTWAITTOTHROWYOUR'WELCOMETOPONYVILLEPARTY'ANDTHEN*HMPH*" She was cut off as Twilight put a hoof to her mouth.
I just looked at the pink pony with a look of pure shock. I had never heard anything speak so fast before, and I definitely understood Twilights warning now.
"Umm....my names Nick" was all I could manage to say. Twilight, who still had her hoof on pinks mouth, adressed her sternly.
"When I remove my hoof, you have got to reel it in a tad, ok? Nicholas is new here, and we don't need you scaring him, alright?" Pink let out a muffled response and nodded her head rapidly. With a roll of her eyes, Twiight removed her hoof.
Pink started again, slightly slower this time around. "Lets start over, HI! Im pinkie pie, do you want a cupcake?" She pulled a cupcake from....who knows where and handed it to me.
"Thanks?" I said as I looked at the sprinkle-covered cupcake. It couldn't hurt to try a bite, right? I took a decently sized bite.....
And immediately felt like I had been struck by lightning! MAN! That was a lot of sugar! I thought as I started jogging in place. Fluttershy looked at me with a hint of fear before turning to twilight.
"are....humans supposed to do that after getting sweets?" She asked Twilight. Twilight sat in thought for a moment before shaking her head.
"I don't think so..." but before she could finish, I cut her off.
"Hey wheres the next stopping point on this tour?" I asked quickly, jogging faster in place.
"The next place is raritys, its just up the road." Twilight said while pointing down the road. I grinned widely and took off in a sugary hurry in the direction she indicated.
"Nick, wait" Fluttershy called out, but I had already gotten out of hearing range, leaving a frustrated Twilight and a laughing pinkie pie in my wake.
******
As I was running through the town, dodging and weaving through ponies, I ended up slamming into sweetiebell. We quickly became a small pile on the ground.
"ooooooh, what hit me?" She shook her head and looked at me. "Nick?!" I gave her a smile as I got up and helped her up.
"Sorry, Bell. Pinkie Pie fed me a cupcake, and next thing I know, I'm speeding through town faster than lightning!" I said as Sweetiebelle giggled.
"Her sweets will do that when you first eat them. I'm glad to see your finally out of that cottage, though. what brings you to my sister's house?" I turned and looked at the tall tower-like structure in front of me. I turned back to Sweetiebelle.
"Twilight and Fluttershy were giving me a tour of ponyville. But then I left them in the dust back at pinks place." As I said that, her face lit up.
"I have and idea! why don't I show you my sisters house, and then show you around the rest of ponyville?" She asked.
"Sounds great to me! Hey, while we are around we could see if we could find the other girls as well." I said while her smile just got bigger.
"YEAH! we could make a crusade out of it! I guess we should start here, though." She said as we walked into the house-tower thing.
When we walked in, it was easy to tell what her sisters line of work was. From the manequins to the material all over the place, I had just stepped into a divas workshop.
"Ah, Sweetiebelle, your back. Did you get Spike for me?" A posh voice sounded out as a white pony came from upstairs. She had purple hair that coiled a bit at the front and had three diamonds for a cutie mark.
"Spike was busy doing chores at Twilights, but I brought a friend instead." Sweetiebelle said as she motioned to me. The mare looked at me, or at my clothes anyway, and gasped.
"Darling, what is it that your wearing? That shirt and pants are much too dirty for you to be walking around in." She said as she pulled out some measuring tools. "You must let me make you some new clothes immediately!"
I looked at my clothes. I HAD been wearing them for 2 days straight. And they were pretty dirty, after all. "Ok, but you do know I cant pay for the new ones, right?" I said nervously, not liking the way she was looking at me. It was like she saw me as some sort of challenge or experiment.
"Dearie, there is no cost for a friend of my sister. what did you say your name was?" She asked as she measured my legs.
"Nicholas, but most people call me Nick." I said as she measured out my waistline.
"Darling, thats such a noble name." She said as she finished with my arms. "I'll have your clothes done in a day or two at most. Where should I have them sent?"
I looked at her with suprise. It usually took waaaay longer for tailors to make clothes. "I'm living at Fluttershys since I have nowhere else to go." As I said that, Rarity gasped.
"Oh my, how dreadful!" she said dramatically as she fainted onto a couch. "Why do you have nowhere else to go?"
I shifted a bit uncomfortably. "Long story short, Im from another world. but Fluttershy said she'd look after me for now. So its fine" I said as she calmed down. Sweetiebelle just laughed at the situation.
"I think we should get going before my sister throws another one of her fits." She said as we ran out before Rarity could get her back for the quip.
"I DO NOT THROW FITS!!!!" I heard her yell from inside her house-tower thing. This made me and Sweetiebelle fall to the ground with laughter.
"What are y'all up ta?" I heard a feminine southern voice ask. I got up and came face to face with an orange pony. She had yellow hair and a cowboy hat on. She also had apples on her flank, which made a question pop into my mind.
"We were messing with rarity, miss. But can I ask you a question?" I asked.
"Well, ah don't see why not" She said. yup, defenitely southern.
"Are you related to Applebloom, by any chance?" I asked just as said pony came up behind me.
"Yup, that's mah sister Applejack!" Applebloom stated rather loudly next to me, causing me to jump in suprise.
"AH! don't do that!" I yelped, but smiling all the same. Applebloom simply laughed it off as Aj chuckled.
"So, you must be Nicholas, huh? Mah sis has been yammerin' about ya for two days straight." Aj said while side-eyeing Applebloom, who currently blushed at the call-out.
"Now, why did ya go an' tell em that for?" She said while pouting, Causing me and Sweetiebelle to burst out laughing. Soon enough, Applebloom joined in as well.
"Well, y'all seem to be havin' fun, so Ima head back to the stand. Y'all behave now." She said walking off.
"We will!" All three of us said. I turned to the girls.
"Now, where are we going to find Scoots?"
The two girls shared a smirk."We know exactly where she will be at right now." Sweetiebelle said.
********
After taking a bit of a walk, we came across an open field where Scootaloo was sitting while staring at this pegasus that was flying around. The girls were about to call out to her when I stopped them, motioning them to move quietly. Soon, we were right behind her, so I quickly jumped in front of her line of sight.
"HOWDY SCOOTS!!!!" I yelled at the top of my lungs, causing Scootaloo to screech and jump back 6 feet before landing on her back. The girls burst out laughing while Scootaloo sat up.
"Gee, very funny guys." Scootaloo said, but she was smiling so I knew no harm was done. I then heard laughing from behind me.
"Hehehe, Man that was good!" the pegasus said as she landed next to me. She was a light blue, with a rainbow mane and had a rainbow lightning. bolt coming out of a cloud. She looked me over. "What are you, anyway?"
"My names Nicholas, your friendly neighborhood human." I said while putting out my fist, hoping that I had geussed right thinking she was a tomboy.
Thankfully, I was. She smiled and fist(hoof?) bumped me back. "I'm rainbow dash, fastest pegasus in equestria!" She turned to Scootaloo. "This is the guy you were saying came from another world?" Scoots nodded. "Man, that makes you like, 20 percent cooler right off the bat!" Rainbow exlaimed.
Dang, she's just like Ronin. I thought to myself. I turned to Scootaloo. "Hey, we're going over to the town hall. Wanna come with?" She looked over to Rainbow dash.
Rainbow chuckled. "Go ahead squirt, I need to take a break anyway."
"Ok, Rainbow dash!" She said as she followed us back into town as Rainbow Dash flew off.
*********
"Oh boy." I mumbled as we came up to the town hall. Standing directly in front of it was this old tan mare with Fluttershy and a VERY ticked Twilight.
"Well, we're going to go before Twilight gets us too!" Scootaloo said as Twilight started angrily trotting towards us.
"Girls wait!" I said, but as i turned around, the girls were gone. "Great." I moaned as Twilight came up to me.
"Where have you been? You should've been here exactly four minutes ago, your late!" She scolded me.
Your kidding, right? I thought as the other two ponies walked up.
"So this is young Nicholas?" The tan pony said. "Nice to meet you, I'm mayor mare, And I will be handling the paperwork for your integration into our town." I smirked at the name, but stayed polite.
"Nice to meet you, ma'am. Sorry if I was SLIGHTLY tardy, but I had some friends showing me your lovely town." I said, glaring at Twilight halfway through, receiving a stuck-out tongue in response.
"Well, I'm glad you think so, dear. Let us go inside and make this official." Mayor Mare said as we walked inside.
**********
3 grueling hours later
**********
"FINALLY!!!" I moaned as we walked out. It had quite possibly been the most boring thing I had ever been through. After explaining where I came from. We had to sit through a whole speil about the responsibility of taking care of a kid. Thank goodness Fluttershy is well known for taking care of living things, or it may have been harder to convince the mayor.
"It wasn't that bad, Nick." Twilight said. "Well, I've got to get back to the library and check on spike. So I'll see you two later." She walked off.
"Bye twilight." Fluttershy said, then turned to me. "Oh, I'm so excited to be able to take care of you, Nicholas." I simply shrugged.
"You've already been doing that and so much more, just now the FBI won't come crashing through the ceiling or anything to get me." I said with a laugh. Fluttershy just looked confused.
"Whats a....FBI?" She asked? I waved my hand.
"Ehh, earth thing. don't worry about it. Now, we should be getting back to the cottage." I said as she nodded.
"Yes, I can't wait to tell my animal friends the news and....huh?" She stopped as I poked her on the forehead and started running.
"Race ya there!" I yelled as i took off. She simply smiled and flew after me, determined to catch me or beat me to the cottage.
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Wait, he’s taller than twilight?
But, he’s not a colt.
That would be amazing.
Ohh. I thought she was talking about the mayor.
I guess she doesn’t care if he’s a different creature.
She must’ve taken notes from pinkie pie.
So applejack already knew about him?
I’m surprised he was able to guess that.
I can see it.
I swear to god/celestia, she better not be upset about no four minutes. Or she better have another reason to be upset.
Ok, based on this I can say that twilight is at most 19.
Aww
10624998
to answer the main questions:
he kneeled because twilights head was down. ponies arent that tall normally, so hes on height with most of them, if not taller.
Nicholas is a kid, so most poeple wont be afraid of him.
and yes, twilight was upset about 4 minutes.
and yeah, the CMC's aren't the best with secrets, so their respective sisters/idol already heard about Nick.
Hmmm improvements.
I approve of this.
Great work.
10625532
Thanks! glad ya noticed.
And so we will analyze the plot.
It had been two days since I had appeared in this world. Until I believed I was ready to go into town, I had decided to bunker down at Fluttershys. She had no problem with this, even though every time I went to help around the house, she would try to stop me from doing so. I would end up doing it anyway. I mean, she was literally taking care of me. It only made since to do my part around here. In fact, that's what i found myself doing that fateful monday when i decided to man up and hit the town.
It's been two days! Twilight and everyone else, still do not know that there is a person in Ponyville? And tembolee СMС should have blabbed to all ponies, about it! Or did Fluttershy decide to hide this fact?
"Speaking of funny, I should warn you. The pony your about to meet can be a bit... eccentric." Twilight said. I frowned at that. But before I could say anything, a wall of pink floof blocked my vision.
"OMYGOSHOMYGOSHIVENEVERSEENSOMEPONYLIKEYOUINTOWNBEFORE!YOUMUSTBENEW!!!!MYNAMEISPINKIEPIE!ICANTWAITTOTHROWYOUR'WELCOMETOPONYVILLEPARTY'ANDTHEN*HMPH*" She was cut off as Twilight put a hoof to her mouth.
Honestly, you did an incredible feat when you wrote this! I am still afraid to describe Pinkie Pie in my story. I just don't have enough nerves. Anyway, this is already becoming cliche.
Pink started again, slightly slower this time around. "Lets start over, HI! Im pinkie pie, do you want a cupcake?" She pulled a cupcake from....who knows where and handed it to me.
"Thanks?" I said as I looked at the sprinkle-covered cupcake. It couldn't hurt to try a bite, right? I took a decently sized bite.....
And immediately felt like I had been struck by lightning! MAN! That was a lot of sugar! I thought as I started jogging in place. Fluttershy looked at me with a hint of fear before turning to twilight.
"are....humans supposed to do that after getting sweets?" She asked Twilight. Twilight sat in thought for a moment before shaking her head.
"I don't think so..." but before she could finish, I cut her off.
"Hey wheres the next stopping point on this tour?" I asked quickly, jogging faster in place.
Was the cupcake with cocaine?😄
"Ah, Sweetiebelle, your back. Did you get Spike for me?" A posh voice sounded out as a white pony came from upstairs. She had purple hair that coiled a bit at the front and had three diamonds for a cutie mark.
"Spike was busy doing chores at Twilights, but I brought a friend instead." Sweetiebelle said as she motioned to me. The mare looked at me, or at my clothes anyway, and gasped.
"Darling, what is it that your wearing? That shirt and pants are much too dirty for you to be walking around in." She said as she pulled out some measuring tools. "You must let me make you some new clothes immediately!"
Rarity was more surprised by the clothes than by the man himself! Maybe she forgot to put on her famous glasses? Or is it normal for her? Although I am not making a claim on this, it is certainly perceptible in the plot.
i.ytimg.com/vi/uRpXlDMWY_w/maxresdefault.jpg
"Dearie, there is no cost for a friend of my sister. what did you say your name was?" She asked as she measured my legs.
"Nicholas, but most people call me Nick." I said as she measured out my waistline.
"Darling, thats such a noble name." She said as she finished with my arms. "I'll have your clothes done in a day or two at most. Where should I have them sent?"
I looked at her with suprise. It usually took waaaay longer for tailors to make clothes. "I'm living at Fluttershys since I have nowhere else to go." As I said that, Rarity gasped.
"Oh my, how dreadful!" she said dramatically as she fainted onto a couch. "Why do you have nowhere else to go?"
I bet Rarity is one of your favorite ponies, and so is Fluttershy! I really felt it when I read this part of the text. You were clearly blinded by the beauty of this unicorn that your dialogues were reduced to the most important thing! It's interesting, of course, so you threw away the unnecessary.
😉
"Yup, that's mah sister Applejack!" Applebloom stated rather loudly next to me, causing me to jump in suprise.
"AH! don't do that!" I yelped, but smiling all the same. Applebloom simply laughed it off as Aj chuckled.
"So, you must be Nicholas, huh? Mah sis has been yammerin' about ya for two days straight." Aj said while side-eyeing Applebloom, who currently blushed at the call-out.
"Now, why did ya go an' tell em that for?" She said while pouting, Causing me and Sweetiebelle to burst out laughing. Soon enough, Applebloom joined in as well.
"Well, y'all seem to be havin' fun, so Ima head back to the stand. Y'all behave now." She said walking off.
"We will!" All three of us said. I turned to the girls.
Applejack. She didn't even invite him to the apple farm? Treat yourself to apple pie!
"So this is young Nicholas" The tan pony said. "Nice to meet you, I'm mayor mare, And I will be handling the paperwork for your integration into our town." I smirked at the name, but stayed polite.
There must be a question mark here? "So this is young Nicholas"
For this moment, I will write a little more details. First, the name must be capitalized - Mare.
Secondly, here it was possible to add more emotions to the description. For example, her definitely surprised expression! It was the first time she saw such a creature. She is responsible for the new citizen of Equestria, which is an unusual species for the entire Equus. This means that you can describe her face and her words more emotionally. (Surprise, Curiosity, Empathy, and a little Experience).
And one more thing. I like this Mayor Mare!
derpicdn.net/img/2015/12/2/1035327/large.png
I believe that every mare has the right to be beautiful.
derpicdn.net/img/2020/3/16/2298496/large.png
3 grueling hours later 😆I ... hahah. I imagined what they were doing there FOR A WHOLE THREE HOURS! Poor Nick. He had to come out with a different reaction. Of course, if he was an adult! 😇You made me laugh with just these words. my cheeks started to hurt! Thanks for the interesting text!
The end of the chapter was very sweet and funny! Especially the FBI joke. I'm not an American, but a Russian, but I still respect those people who serve in the FBI. A very specific job in the secret police. This is a little familiar to me.
In general, I will continue to study your story further. But Ronin's fate interests me more, at the moment.
10741130
Thanks for the reaction, and the catch with the question mark. Interesting to see Ronin has your attention the most.
embarrassed
You missed multible ' . ' at the end of a sentance.
Seriously? There a alien and they just want to put it to education like its a native? ... ... You didnt think that one trough did you?
On one hand its odd they are surprised Fluttershy would do she continues what she did already. One tje other... Acrualy nevermind...
Its literally pointless to do the paperwork or the school thing yet. In one weeks time he will be permanently in Canterlot with his familie ( Raiden ).
Its hard on the eyes and the autoreader just crashed on me ( lol ) perhaps add lines in between. Example:
O-MY-GOSH-O-MY-GOSH-IVE-NEVER-SEEN-SOMEPONY-LIKE-YOU-IN-TOWN-BEFORE!
I know it out of nowere but did Nick never hear of 'stranger danger' also suuugarrr ruuussshhh
A bit strange why Applejack is so calm around a Human if a Zebra freaked her out... Unless Sweety Bell is one hell of a Amazon warrior
She is extreamly protecting of AB after all...
Sounds like you nailed the cowgirl accent
lightning
He is going to be permanently shipped to his only remaining familie in Canterlot. That pointless
Also a Major is making wjat just a princess is doing? Unlikely. Unless a princess is making him a foreign dignety hes basicly a illegal Immigrant
Fluttershy can be apointed a temporary guardian but he has known familie members...
FBI meme? Neat!
That would basicly happen if Mayor Mare try to do a princess job by the way...
10625025
Explaineds a lot actually.
10625532
Its getting better. More of a good job than a great one.
10741449
Since Nicholas is a child, they kinda have to treat him a bit more openly then an adult.
Yeah, kinda hard to plan out with the princesses when they havent realized hes there yet.
thanks again for the spell catches