• Member Since 14th Dec, 2020
  • offline last seen May 11th

nagoluckywriting


"Yeah, or maybe it's just, like, a feeling, you know?"

T

Rainbow Dash had it all. Fame. Glory. A beautiful Wonderbolts uniform in her wardrobe. Then she fails one of the Wonderbolts' routine drug checks, and her legacy unravels to reveal the ugly truth beneath. In pieces, a familiar turquoise mare shows up in her life and Rainbow is forced to face the consequences of her actions.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 11 )

great story. i love a bit of Dash n Dust fluffy romance

10590094
Thanks! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Rainbow Dash and Lightning Dust are an interesting romantic pairing to me, and a pairing that I wanted to explore through this story.

No this is stupid.
They were all completely out of character with how they acted and:

Rainbow will forever be remembered by Cloudsdale and Equestria for her shameful decision to carve a path to glory using performance enhancing drugs

No, fuck that noise, a multiple time national hero has rights.

10590388

No, fuck that noise, a multiple time national hero has rights.

Fair point. It's difficult to capture the multitude of views that the public would have with regards to Rainbow's decision to dope. Hero or not though, I felt that her legacy would be tarnished to some degree, hence the decision to include that line.

Is there any way you could elaborate on areas where you felt the characters, Rainbow Dash specifically, didn't act in the way that you expected them to act? I'm glad you gave my story a read, by the way, even if you didn't like it.

10590468
No Rainbow i have actually not that many problems with . .
She cheated trying to get faster because of her massive ego, she tried to deflect the blame claiming somebody set her up but ultimately came clean so to speak about having done it.
Scootaloo as well, when she figures it out, even if her blabbing to the press was completely unneeded.
Can't say much to Lightning Dust, that was a one of twice off in the series? Not much Character to develope and know there.
But the others from the main six?
Flutters would be disappointed but not callus like that.
Spike? Treating her like that with his comments about shooting up? Also just a flat no.
Twilight "Princess of Friendship, owes Rainbow Dash HER LIFE several Times over" Sparkle simply IGNORING her like that?
No, that just does not gel.
And the Guards SHOULD FUCKING KNOW RAINBOW DASH, (now ex)Wonderbolt and several time national Hero has saved probably the WORLD AT LARGE more than once.
And she should have full access to the castle as well because of her Status.
Starlight Firing her . . eh . . no, not sure about that one either. Just because she used Steroids does not mean she does not know how to teach things about PE.
Also, having her participate in the running of the leaves was stupid one way or another.
Either she wins and nobody accepts it because "See, she doped again!" Or she loses and then what does it even matter?
Applejack was her typical background pony self and just such a non entity up untill the race where she basically acted like nothing had changed at all. Still same competitive and heckling attitude towards Dash, which is completely fine. Not one word about the whole scandal from her is strange but completely okay.

10590496
I appreciate the feedback! Looking back, I focused less on the secondary characters in this story, Fluttershy, Twilight, etcetera, and their reactions to the situation. A bit more time and thought could've been spent there.

While the celebrity status is not a constant presence in the show, Rainbow Dash and the other members of the Mane 6 have saved Equestria many times and are well-known as heroes, so your point about the scene with the guards is definitely valid. I'll keep that in mind when I write stories that are placed within the context of the events of Friendship is Magic.

As for the decision to have Rainbow Dash participate in the Running of the Leaves, it was less about the race and more about her bonding with Lightning Dust, but I can see how that might be a tad confusing due in part to some of the dialog.

Again, thanks for the feedback and the read. :)

10590890
It is well enough written from a technical standpoint.
No glaring spelling or grammar mistakes, the tenses check out.
I only noticed one or two of the your / you're problem in there.

RDT

This story was fucking brilliant. The way the others reacted was completely true to what happens in the real world - some friends stay supportive, and some don't. And who stays and who doesn't can often seem random.
Seeing this sort of thing from Dash's perspective was also great. You really nailed her down, with the way she thinks and speaks.
Loved it. This is going into my favourites bookshelf.

10707706
Thank you! I had a lot of fun writing this one and I'm glad that you enjoyed it. :)

Jesus, that was something. Writing could be better, but it's already pretty good. Original idea, I like it. The dynamic between characters are good too.

Though, what's with the wonky font?

10590388
That's journalism for you bud, it's all the same all across the multiverse.

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