Chapter 1
"What a wonderful day" I said stepping into the convention center. I was dressed in my Synth costume and looking around for something to add to it.
My name is John Stein, my Synth character's name is R-E-X, that stands for Robotic-Evolutionary-Xenoform. He's a jet black fairly standard Synth model with a few hidden features.
For example my Synth has compartments in the legs to hide stuff, kind of like Robocop. When running he could reach mach 5, possibly even faster if upgraded and with regular maintenance.
The Synth even had the power of flight thanks to a special pair of black hard-light holographic membranous wings, giving him the appearance to that of a wyvern. In flight, he could reach mach 7.
His claws on both his hands and feet can be sharp enough to cut through anything with ease. they even allowed him to walk on walls.
He also had jaws that could shoot gravity beams like king ghidorah. And the jaws were strong enough to crush or tear anything, especially with sharp teeth that could cut diamonds. He had retractable fangs that could inject or spray anything, from calming scents to toxins, poisons, and even acid. And to make it even better, a forked tongue, and most importantly a boopable snoot.
There were also special cameras in the visor that could see things in multiple spectrums of light.
My character's visor design is the one in the center, top row.
I began walking around the con center, and getting a few stares, and "nice cosplay man!" From a few others. It wasn't long until I found a stall with some creepy guy attending it. I looked at what he had. I saw something awesome, it was a pair of Star Wars Darksaber replicas. I had to have them.
"Hey how much for the pair of darksabers?" I asked. "How much do you have?" Asked the merchant.
"About $200, thats as high as I can go" I said. "Done, have a nice trip" he said giving me the creeps. I gave him the money and took the Darksabers.
I began feeling dizzy. "OH SHIT! The fanfics were true!" I said passing out.
---Later---
I woke up a few minutes later with the worst headache.
-FULL SYSTEM REBOOT COMPLETE-
-RUNNING FULL DIAGNOSTICS-
'Oh hell No! Damn it!' I think trying to get up. But I couldn't. My body felt different, I couldn't move.
I just realized what I was.
'DAMN YOU MERCHANT! DAMN YOU TO HELL! I did not want to become a Synth!'
I tried in vain to move my arm so I could shake my fist at the heavens.
-DIAGNOSTICS COMPLETE-
-MOTOR FUNCTIONS 100%-
-CPU FUNCTIONALITY 100%-
-POWER LEVELS 100%-
-STRENGTH 100%-
-SPEED 100%-
-AGILITY 100%-
-STAMINA 100%-
-HUNGER 0%-
"Ok, so let's try moving now" I said, my voice sounding metallic, similar to Soundwave, but more like my own. I lifted one arm and looked at it. My HUD scanned it. It was real, I was really a Synth. I put the arm down and brought my other arm and put it below me. I began to slowly pick myself up. I tried standing but I fell right back on my face, er, visor.
I decided to go into a more feral posture, walking on all fours. I found my Darksabers next to me. I grabbed them and looked for a place to put them. Just then a compartmant in my leg opened up. It took me a while to process.
I placed the sheathed Darksaber into a holder designed for it. I then continued to repeat the same action with my other leg. With both Darksabers put away, I began walking on my hands and feet, and I had no idea where I was going.
I eventually found myself near a castle that looked a lot like the castle of the two sisters, only it looked brand new. I kept going with my little lizard walk, and found I was at the edge of a cliff.
I looked down, it was a big drop. I looked back at the castle and sat down as best I could. It took me 30 minutes to figure it out. I lied myself down and put my head on my arms. I looked at the castle when I heard a loud blast. When I looked I could not believe my optics.
I saw Celestia and Nightmare Moon having a magic dogfight.
-ERROR-
I began sparking, I could not believe what my sensors and optics were showing me.
Right in front of me was the real deal.
'Ok, am definitely In Equestria, that means I've arrived back 1,000 years before episode 1. And that just means right now is the battle between Princess Celestia and Nightmare Moon.
So that castle over there must be the castle of the two sisters, and this forest is the Everfree Forest.'
I began looking for a way to get across. Then I looked at my talons. I began walking down the cliff. I made it all the way down and saw something interesting 'Oh look thats the cave where the tree of harmony is'.
I crossed the bottom and went up the other side. I kept walking to the castle. I found an open window and crawled in.
I made my way to the room where Celestia would be after she sent Nightmare Moon to... Well the moon. I laid down in a dark corner on the floor. I didn't have to wait long.
---Celestia POV---
'Oh sister, I will miss you' I thought with tears. I heard something move in the corner. I looked over but couldn't see anything. "Who's there?" I said wiping away my tears. "Show yourself!" I said.
"I can't, fear keeps me from doing so" said an odd voice. "Come out there is no need to fear" I said. "Not my fear, you will be afraid" said the voice. "I'm not afraid, please come out, I will not harm you" I said.
"Do you promise you won't try to harm me, that you won't be afraid?" Asked the voice.
"Yes, I promise, now please, come out" I said. Just then two glowing green slitted eyes found their way to mine. But they didn't seem angry, they seemed sad. "Are you sure you want me to come out, just you looking at my eyes frighten you" said the the creature, the eyes looking even sadder.
"I'm sorry, I'm just a little nervous, please come over here" I said. The eyes seemed conflicted. Then they began coming closer. As soon as I saw its head I couldn't believe my eyes, it seemed to be some sort of creature. It kept coming into the light. Now it's full body was out.
The whole creature was jet black. Its head had two horns with blue lights which seemed to be on multiple parts of its body, and its jaws had sharp teeth, it's body definitely seemed reptilian, yet it had no scales. It had sharp claws on each hand and foot. Its tail was long and seemed to be segmented. 'What is this creature' thought Celestia.
"What are you?" I asked.
---POV SWITCH---
"What are you?" asked Celestia.
I took a few minutes before I answered. I looked into her eyes and my HUD told me she was confused and a little scared. I came closer to her slowly. "I am a Synth" I said.
She became more confused. "What is a Synth?" She asked. "A Synth is an artificial life form, in other words a form of android, or robot" I said making her fear turn completely into confusion. "I'm a machine, I'm able to act as a living creature, and have a mind of my own" I said. "A machine? But you look so, so, so" began Celestia. "Different? Complex? Adorable?" I tried to finish.
She began to laugh. "If you want, you can touch me, you won't be disappointed" I said getting close and sitting down. Celestia was nervous, but she began to lift her hoof. She brought it towards my to my left side. As soon as she made contact she was surprised. "You're so soft, and warm!?!" She said. "I'm covered in special plating made to act like real skin" I said. She began moving her hoof to my head. "Why are you so hard?" She asked. "Pft, Hahaha, Why are you so hard?: title of your sex tape, HAHAHA" I laughed. "I don't understand, all I said was your head is hard" said Celestia. "Pft, Hahaha, your head is hard: sequel to your other sex tape, HAHAHAHA! Please stop, your gonna make me short circuit, Hahaha!" I laughed and began rolling around on the ground.
--2 hours Later--
"Hahaha, ha ha, ha, okay I'm glad I got all that out of my system" I said. Celestia was unamused. "Are you finished?" She asked. I looked at her. "Yes, I am, sorry, If you haven't noticed, I'm more like a living thing than a machine" I said. Celestia made her signature motherly smile. "I can see that, you really seem to be alive, yet I don't sense any life force" she said.
"Well technically, I am self aware, and I come from a place where my kind is regarded as a species, not as objects or simple machines" I said. "I don't completely understand, but you seem to be harmless, so I will allow you to live In Equestria as long as you don't harm my little ponies" She said. "I have no interest in causing harm, but if I am attacked I can and will defend myself, but since I am to be living in this world I shall remain in the forest, so ponies will leave me alone, there I will make myself a shelter, and hopefully I can build a generator" I said.
"Very well, you may stay in the Everfree, but why do you need a generator?" She asked. "The original purpose of Synths was to consume power, the world my kind is from, had an energy crisis" I said. "What? Wouldn't an energy crisis be a bad thing?" Asked Celestia.
"No, the crisis was that there was too much energy, and the dominant organic species were sick and weak, so they made Synths, Synths were built to help and serve, they could do any job, heavy lifting, construction, even Doctor or nurse, as soon as the Synths aided the sick, and everything was working smoothly, Synths were regarded as a species, so both kinds could live in peace and harmony, and organic species could even have romantic relationships with Synths, Synths could have children, they could love, they were no different from each other" I said. I sound so much like Twilight right now.
"Wait, Synths can be able to...." began Celestia. "Have sex, yes we are equipped with the special tools" I said becoming uncomfortable. "Now I need a generator, otherwise I will lose power and shut down" I said. "I will see if I can deliver one personally to you In the forest in a few days, I hope you can last until then" said Celestia. I checked my power levels.
-POWER 99%-
"I should be good for a few days, possibly a few weeks, if I can conserve energy" I said.
"I'm glad, I shall await our next meeting" said Celestia. "As will I" I said walking out. As soon as I left the castle I tried standing up again. It took me a while but I finally was able to walk on my own two feet. If I were to guess, I was taller than Celestia.
I began looking around for a good spot to stay. I found a good spot next to a fast river that led to a waterfall. I jumped over the river, and found myself on the other side. I walked towards the edge of the cliff next to the waterfall. I looked down. I turned around and went to the clearing a few feet away. I decided to make a survival bunker. I began digging a large hole in the ground a 8 foot deep 20-20 foot square.
I went over to a tree and brought out a Darksaber from my right compartment. I turned it on and began cutting the tree. It came down in a few seconds. I cut it into planks and made a staircase in the hole. I cut down a few more trees and made a floor at the bottom. I made a few walls with a few more trees. I made a floor above the one below to act as a living room and kitchen and made a few more walls and a roof. I made a table and chairs by using my claws.
I made a coffee table and a bench that would be a placeholder for a couch. I made a few primitive windows and shutters. I walked down into the room below and made a nightstand and a mattress-less bed. As soon as I finished I put away my Darksaber and went out to admire my work.
It wasn't pretty, but it wasn't designed for having good looks. I began covering the whole thing with dirt so it would look like a hill. I gathered a few pinecones and acorns and placed them around the bunker. So after a few years they would hide the bunker from view. I got to work on making a spot for a garden, and when I finished, I went to dig a deep hole a 7 feet from the river it was a small kidney shaped pool 8 feet deep and 30-10 feet across. I dug a trail from the pool to the river. As soon as the path was made water began to fill the pool. I went over to the bend of the pool and began digging a path to the cliff.
As soon as the water finally filled the pool it was all dirty.
Then I broke a small wall so the water would go into the path to the cliff. I went into the river to clean myself off. Then I went into my bunker to wait for Celestia to bring the generator.
---3 Days later---
"Hello Synth, are you there?" I heard Celestia. I got up and walked out to greet her. "I just now. Realized I never gave you my name" I said. "Oh my, um no, you didn't, but I brought you this generator" said Celestia gesturing to the generator she had brought. "My name is R-E-X" i said to her. "It's an acronym for, Robotic Evolutionary Xenoform" I said.
Celestia was starting to stare. I walked towards her and waved a hand in front of her face. "Huh, what?" She said. "Is something wrong?" I asked. "What, no, I'm sorry REX, I've been distant for a while, here is your generator" she said. She used her magic and floated the generator over to me. I was about to hold it but as soon as her magic stopped. I fell over with a yelp.
"Ow, heavy, my body is not built for heavy lifting, it is built for speed and stealth" I said. "Oh I'm sorry, here let me help you" she said lifting the generator with her magic.
"It's alright, I'm also built to adapt, so it might take a while for my body to get a bit stronger, please come in" I said, gesturing inside.
"Of course, thank you" said Celestia. I followed her in and told her where to put the generator. I brought her downstairs and I had her place it next to the nightstand, so I could recharge while I slept. We walked back up the stairs and I offered her a seat in the living room. "I'm sorry It's a bit dull in here, I don't really have anything to make upholstery, so my chairs are a little hard" I said.
"They feel comfortable, where did you get them" complimented Celestia. "I carved them myself, with my claws, it's the best I can do with what I have" I said my eye motifs looking sad and disappointed. "If you'd like I can bring you better furniture" asked Celestia. "That would be nice, I could also use some plumbing, I don't really need to eat, but I am able to, so I need running water, and a few bathrooms, sinks and stuff like that" I said.
We talked for a few hours until it was time for her to go.
"Thanks for bringing the generator, good luck with those nobles" I said waving goodbye. "Thank you, I hope to see you again soon" said Celestia flying off. I watched her go and went back inside. I got to my bed and plugged myself into the generator, turned it on and went to sleep.
--- 992 years later---
-BANG-
"Aaaaah, oof" I shouted as I hit the floor. I got up and ran outside. I looked up at the sky. "So, Rainbow finally did her first sonic Rainboom, and since that was a catalyst for the entire mane six, now I just have to wait a few years until Nightmare Moon returns" I said rubbing my hands together like an evil genius from old cartoons.
I watched the Rainbow go across the sky. "I'm gonna be waiting for a long time" I said. "Whelp, might as well shut myself off for a few years, hopefully by then I can show myself, oh wait I haven't sent out a token yet!" I said.
I pulled out my Darksabers and channeled myself into them. "Whoever finds these simple tools, be they worthy, toss them to the sky, catch them and activate them, so they can call upon me, The next generation in technology, R-E-X!" I said into my Darksabers. I then saw a portal open up and I tossed the Darksabers into it. A few minutes later they came back. I caught them and put them away.
I looked once again at the Rainbow. "I can't wait to meet Twilight" I said walking in. I began my shutdown by writing a note and placing it on my front door for Celestia to find. I then proceeded to lie down on my bed. Once I was lying down I had to decide how long I wanted to sleep.
"Hmmm, what would be a good time to show myself, oh, I know, the day after the poison joke episode! Then they might be a little more accepting of me" I said to myself. I opened my nightstand drawer and took out a few polymers and metals and shoved them into my mouth. I chewed thoroughly and swallowed.
"Might as well have a few upgrades when I wake up, glad I kept those in my drawer for when I need to adapt, now lets see, I'll need to toughen up my plating and skeleton, for more durability, I'll need a few laser weapons in my arms, just cuz it's cool, then I'll need to have more speed and strength, yup that should be about it" I said while creating the plans. I set the upgrades to automatic, and went to sleep.
--- 8 years and several months later.---
-POWERING ON-
-RUNNING FULL SYSTEM DIAGNOSTICS-
-ALL SYSTEMS UPGRADES ARE COMPLETE -
-STRENGTH INCREASED BY 70%-
-SPEED INCREASED BY 70%-
-STAMINA INCREASED BY 70%-
-ARMOR INCREASED BY 80%-
-POWER SYSTEM INCREASED EFFICIENCY BY 70%-
-FULL SYSTEMS CHECK COMPLETE-
-BEGINNING REBOOT-
-REBOOT COMPLETE-
-ALL SYSTEMS ONLINE-
-BEGINNING AWAKENING PROTOCOLS-
"YAAAWN, wooooh, I feel great, time to say howdy to the ponies" I said getting up. I looked at the time. -8:00 A.M.- 'perfect let's roll!' I think to myself. I walked up the stairs and opened the door only to find three little ponies. 'Cutie mark crusaders?' I thought.
They had shocked looks on their faces, and one had a hoof raised, they were about to knock but I opened the door before they could. "You three going to stand out there with the Timberwolves or are you gonna come in and have a seat?" I said looking at them.
I threw my voice behind them and made a Timberwolf howl. "Aaah" they screamed and ran inside. I could only smile. I went to the kitchen and got out a tray and a few glasses. I filled each with water, from the sink. (I got plumbing a few hundred years ago)
I put each cup on the tray and put a straw in each. They were each sitting on the couch, I walked over to the coffee table and placed down the tray. I grabbed my cup and gestured to the tray.
"Hope you like water, it's all I have for guests" I said sitting down. Each pony looked at each other and grabbed a glass. 'How are they able to hold things? Their hooves they should not be able to grab things' I think to myself. I set my eye motifs for the friendliest setting I could.
They each took a sip of the water and calmed down a bit. "Excuse me mister, but who and what are you?" Asked Applebloom. I did my best to smile.
"The best word for what I am, would be robot, and my name is R-E-X" I said looking at the most adorable little ponies I could ever see.
"You're a robot?" Asked Scootaloo. "I'm actually called a Synth, but yes" I said looking at them. "Cool, can you fly and shoot lasers?" Asked Scootaloo excitedly.
"I can, I also have laser swords too, but I can show you girls that later, now I just wanna have you three tell a unicorn named Twilight that you found me, she doesn't know me, but I know everything about her" I said. "How do you know Twilight?" asked Sweetie belle.
I walked behind the couch and gathered each pony close. I put my right hand in front of the four of us. "Alright girls, there is a camera in my hand, so say cheese" I said.
They did as I asked.
"CHEEEESE" we all said together. The picture came out of my mouth. I gave it to the girls. "This is proof, to show Twilight, when you tell her about me give this picture to her" I said. "Now, who wants to get out of this forest and back to Ponyville?" I asked.
They all raised their hooves. "Ok, lets go" I said while walking outside with the cmc close behind. I gathered them together in front of my bunker. I spread out my arms and allowed my hard-light holographic wings to form. "Wow" they each said.
I began flapping and took off, I grabbed all three of them with my feet and took to the sky. It didn't take long to get to the edge of the Everfree. As soon as we were close to the edge came in for a landing.
I released each girl and landed. "Ok girls hope you can visit me again sometime!" I said as I took off and headed for home.
---CMC POV---
"We have got to tell Twilight right now" said Sweetie belle. "Right" said Applebloom and Scootaloo.
They all made their way to Twilight's library and entered. "Twilight we have something to show you" said Scootaloo.
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Ok off to a rocky start, but I hope things pick up.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but dislikes will never harm me............
physically. Mentally however, maybe.
Don’t let anyone say to you that this story is bad.
It's hard to take the word of someone who has cursebringer as a username.
It is definitely a cool username tho.
We don't allow rewrites of stories to be submitted as new stories unless the changes are so significant that the two versions barely resemble each other anymore. That's definitely not the case with these two.
I've restored the original for you already; it's very easy for us to do, so if in the future you delete a story and then later change your mind, you need only ask. Any edits you wanted to make to the original should be made to the original story submission, though. Creating a whole new story post is double-dipping and generally an unfair and spammy sort of practice.
Wow okay where to start? First things first I suppose; the idea. Your basic setting started of very rough, you followed a very “and then and then and then” style of writing which is an easy path to fall into, too much description and not enough space to make it feel natural, instead it felt like reading an end user license agreement, those things you click accept on without really reading? This is easily rectified, limit a paragraph to one description, two at maximum, for any one thing. You kept telling us what R-E-X looked like instead of giving us more interesting details. For example: “He was jet black”- granted this is straight and to the point, but when introducing the main character you ought to add some more pizazz to the whole thing. Maybe try “His skin/scales/coating were the color of the deepest of nights, where light would only reflect off his curves and show his silhouette.” In this way we not only get an idea of his color, but also the material he’s made out of, as something like stone or steel wouldn’t shine like say polished silver or obsidian might in the right environment.
Next the beginning of the story. The convention route is a easy form to follow, there’s loads of good examples to find on this particular platform. However in my opinion you skated through the convention too quickly, not enough time being given to describe where we are. Are we in the states? Which one? What year is it? What time of day is it? Things like this paint a very easy and quick to digest picture of our stage for our character to appear. Next is the time setting once we get to pony land. Choosing to go back to the clash between the sisters is an interesting time period to explore, either before Luna goes loco or after. Which is why it’s such a shame you spend no time at all developing the setting, an otherwise rarely explored portion of the MLP universe.
Next the characters. It’s very important to give thoughts and feelings about things early on in a story so we can understand who the main character is. Of course this depends of the perspective of the story, 1st person writing would be different than 3rd obviously but we don’t really get much in the way of character development before our protagonist is whisked off to horse world. Why is he at the convention? Is it for himself or is he going with a friend? How old is he? Does his family know where he is? Such questions can give us an easy plot hook for later use. If he had family, does he desire to see them again? If so how would he go about finding them? Stuff like that is used for later though, but is still a good thing to remember. Next is sun horse herself, she goes from banishing her sister to chatting up this random creature she found in a room like an hour later? No emotional baggage to deal with I suppose but it doesn’t make her a believable character. Also this, if the story truly starts at the banishment of Luna, why does Celestia have a generator? Much less a mechanical one? Much less, a generator that our main character is compatible with? Massive plot hole there, makes it hard to stay invested in the story. Our synth friend just met Celestia and is in such a rush to run off and go to sleep for a thousand years? Why? Once again, this is like going to Paris and instead of seeing the sights you go to a McDonald’s and order a side of fries. The incredible setting of the banishment of Luna is not explored at all, so many things and story beats are just left unexplored.
Next is editing. Not going to lie this really needs some serious work. Character dialogue is often on the same line, making it difficult to understand who is taking. Basic stuff like spacing and proper paragraphs are all over the place, there’s no structure at all making this a chore to read. If you need some examples of good structure, there’s a group on here dedicated to teaching some easy to follow rules to make writing and reading easier. Time skipping is used in its worst form in this story, being used as a way to skip large portions of time without any information to give meaning to the skips, just to get to the main timeline of the show. If that’s the case then why start so far back in the first place? If you want a previous connection to Celesita for Rex to have then it needs to be more than a token conversation and Celestia going to get a pack of cigarettes for rex before disappearing for a thousand years. It’s sloppy narratively and makes for bad reading, if you’re not going to put in the effort to describe why a thing is happening then why should the reader care at all?
In my opinion this fic is a mess, but one with good bones. With a little work and some good old fashioned elbow grease this fic can shine! Everything for a good story is here, interesting character premise, interesting starting time, open ended plot points to explore/abuse, freedom of direction! I like the idea but the execution needs work. Don’t be discouraged and lose hope, you’ve got the makings of greatness in ya! Keep it up!
10571745
They are just impatient, and lazy. They want a perfect story with perfect descriptions, character development, higher word count per chapter etc... They want every story written by a pro like Mogura, Goldfur, Queen Sanguine Dreams, GreatAzureDragon, Vdrake77, AkumaKami64, Orthoros, Hiver, Anzel, Crystal Wishes, Chaotic Ink, Plague Rat, Irrespective, whatmustido, Reykan, BaryonBrony, Borsuq, Aegis Shield, Kaidan, Bucking Nonsense, BronyWriter, LordBrony2040, Tarbtano, Andoriol, The King of Hearts, Autumn Breeze, Doccular42, Mr Stargazer, tkepner, Crensler, Thadius0, Midnight Shadow, Maltrazz, Calm Wind, Hopefull_Ink_Hoof, Garuda IV, David Silver, tom117z, Nightsclaw, Dapper_Dan, Boomstick Mick, TheAuthorIsSick, TheVClaw, Gentlehoof, Staadnauthursil etc... Speaking of, if you want amazing inspiration and an even better read, I'd highly recommend any of these authors, you will kill hours and even days, and I promise they will inspire and educate you in how to keep someone's attention... ... But back to my original point, they don't want to bother watching someone's progress from zero to hero, they just want hero, you know?
...
What
Are synths like chakats, with their own established lore? I would love to read more about them but don't know where I could find such things. Your Story shows promise and there's plenty of room for improvement. The only major issue I have is that you should rely more on descriptive text then showing a picture of what he looks like
hey thats my RP name
Sounds like a useful ability...until you slam into a tree at over 2000 miles per hour.
Yes, because a society without electricity or even steam engines would have generators just laying around.
DIAGNOSTICS COMPLETE-
-MOTOR FUNCTIONS 100%-
-CPU FUNCTIONALITY 100%-
-POWER LEVELS 100%-
-STRENGTH 100%-
-SPEED 100%-
-AGILITY 100%-
-STAMINA 100%-
-HUNGER 0%-
Dont you miss some rather important things?
- Fluids = For the joints, your acid etc.
- Hull Integrity = Duuuh!
- Internal Maintenance unit = Regular Maintenance requirements stated remember?
- Flight modues = The holo emitters and the Navigationssystem etc.
- Dark Saber Energy Charge = Unless its connected via cable like a proto-lightsaber
Maybe be more specific? Awesome wall climb like a Xenomorph i guess
Anything? Please, your better than that...
Unless your character is a OP GOD everything needs a limit. Go for X-Men adamantium if you have to
Jaws?! He has 2 or more?
Boopable snoot sides my dear.
Unless the glass is elastic...
Seriously?
After one everyone would be leaving if not sooner 
Were do Celestia start and Rex end?
Expernal generation of energy needed? Isnt that literally a death sentances if it get destroyed or the MC is captured by anyone? What about direct damage to the capacitor? Would make recharge a... Complicated topic.
What? Not requirement?!
I doubt anything they have is compatible or advanced enough.
Perhaps aid in construction would be better?
Maybe add you connected everything with synthetic glue...
Did... Did you really waisted 3 days in 'stand by' in hope they magicaly get a compatible generator without any information of what is required in any amount? ... Please add anything
I guess Equestria is in the Industry age at the very least at that point in time?
How big is the 'generator' did it fit in a hand/ hoof or is it big enough to crush Celestias castle if it would be falling on top of it?!
You - have - lamps? Windows? Torches?
Literally pointless time skip. Unless you can tell is roughly what he did in this time! Example:
First 10 years learn the Evertree forest layout and killed all predators bugger than himself of.
Growing 1/3 in size by digging up a mine and consuming materials like metals and gems.
(990 year left) Learning the next 20 years the arts of combat ( CQC - with and without Darksaber ), perhaps distance/range combat ( bow and arrow, explosive trowing, stone/trowing weapons ). 970 years left.
Magic studys since everyone except you can use it (to survive you need to know the capacity and capabilities of your potencial enemys. Lets say you study antisozial line Twilight. 50 years ). 920 years remaining until Luna return. By now your and Celestia are the closest friend she ever had or a lover.
You study 20 years Economics and politics.
900 years left. Things get complicated because of the Griffonia Kingdom/Empire want open war.
After 25 years of a mix of open & cold war you have now experiences in tactics and warfare. 875 years left.
Unfortunately shortly before the war ended that left you damaged do to a assasin getting to you, recovering for 2 years to peak condition. 873 years until you can boop that Lunar snoot. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc.
Rainbow is at least 8 years old by the time Nightmaremoon arrived back in Equestria
You literally wasted years doing ... . . . . . .
NOTHING - AT - ALL ?!
You could like. . . bearly survive 3 days 1000 years ago and now you can do that for Y-E-A-R-S ?
As far as i know the there is no copy of ones own token
Excuse me but you wasted nearly 1000 years on self Improvment but by sleeping for 8 years you gain over 50 % improved output on basicly anything?
Pinkie Pie has more logic
Were is the comedy tag? Than i can at least drown everything in humor
8 Years sleeping yet. He get vistors? Is the 'wood survivel cave' not collapse do to rot?
Sooo... Your Character is pointless over 900 years old and knows about currently living ponys... Ever heard if S.M.I.L.E. ? Pretty sure by now they have dismanteld every part of you, copys paste your tech and since they are polite... Reassembeld you
You have a Gravitation gun and a 3d printer in your jaw? ... How big is your character?
Light dont work like that
Perhaps more like a glider than a actualy flyer?
Unfortunately that all i can give in constructive critic atm. Read you later
Edit: I just checked Chapter 2.
Your Character died of old age... Im sorry for your character