• Member Since 23rd Oct, 2018
  • offline last seen Yesterday

LazyChaoticUmbreon


An idiot who thinks the world is flat. Who could get any dumber than me?

Sequels1

T

This story is a sequel to Only The Beginning


King has come to terms with his life. He is not welcome in the life he thought he had. With the absence of his honor guards, he would have to be careful. He has yet to know if Celestia had mentioned him yet. A part of him hope that she hasn't.


FEATURED 1/4/2021

Chapters (11)
Comments ( 43 )

This looks fun

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS! I just read "Only The Beginning" yesterday!!!!

Well... that was fast.


Next thing we know he just gets attacked for not doing anything...

"A story is sometimes better left untold"

Unfortunately this isn't one of those times. The two stories should be part of the same one, instead of two separate ones. The first chapter should be removed or expanded on, or at the very very very least connected. Not even connected better since that implies a connection in the first place.

There's little flow, the pacing is off, and there's little actually interesting about the main character. He was a kid who watched mlp, who was sent to equestria with godlike powers, and then was captured by the princesses for alleged crimes that probably never happened or he was framed for.

You're all "woooo, mysterious stranger, what could his story be" when everybody reading this know the exact plot points you're going to use. That's not usually a bad thing, but when the additional character doesn't actually have character beyond "mysterious stranger" well. Let's just say this isn't going into my tracking.

Comment posted by Pete100 deleted Dec 4th, 2020
Comment posted by Pete100 deleted Dec 4th, 2020
Comment posted by Pete100 deleted Dec 4th, 2020

"I can feel all kinds of magic and sometimes I can toon that to a certain point. I will explain more later.

'Toon'? Do is it supposed to be tune*?

“Oops, my bad.” King said trying to sound innocently, some how them buying it.

Of course they did.

“So um what’s your name?” Flutter shy asked warning a glance from King.

I thought he already told them his name.

“Who wants to know?” He asked starting to get a little defensive, channeling magic into his paws ready to blast a hole into anyone’s skull that tried to send him to the princesses.

Send this dude back.

His teleportation was different from others he had to have a starting point and like a map pinpoint the point B to which he could teleport to, he can still teleport anywhere he just chooses not to risk being teleported into a rock.

Isn’t that the same as others?

Yeah, what is happening now? Like where did the suit come from and who is the a.i? When did he get these back? Why is he near the Empire? How did he get there? I have so many questions.

Actually also I thought he was a cat?

10582470
:3

oh he is.

All I will say is that Andrew and King are the same and related in more ways than you think ;3

Comment posted by Pete100 deleted Dec 19th, 2020

is it going to turn out that king could have stopped this but was trapped?

It did not take king too long to deal with the troops, but he was afraid of what and where that Warden machine was going.

Where did king come from?

Celestia was receiving reports all over Equestria about metal creatures rising from the ground and causing mass panic among her subjects. She did not know what to do. For the first time if a thousand years she didn’t know what to do. But she knew somepony or rather someone who might.

Is everyone gonna put their differences aside and fight together?

“Listen to me children of gods, and hear my tale of times long past and destruction beyond your comprehension.” A voice spoke through the never ending darkness.

Is it talking to us?

A prophecy was for told; that one day the legion would be reawaken once more to finish its work, but it was also told that two hero’s would rise, one of the light. Elegant, caring, and kind. While the other was of the darkness. Evil, powerful, and yet caring.” The voice said as it made everything disappear making everything go back to full pitch black darkness.

Anyone else getting some naruto vibes?

“Until then, I shall do what I have always done for many years, watch and wait.”

So whoever this is will be revealed?

so he offers assistence and wants to help and even offers his location as a show of good faith and they want to attack him? guessing the elemets wont work or will lock onto celestia and luna insted

Comment posted by LazyChaoticUmbreon deleted January 7th

10618334
I have a more fitting punishment instead for the near future.

;3

10618402
I hope so they murderd king if what you wrote is right

Wait, first he says there a way to stop them and now he’s saying there isn’t?

Ok, so you could blame a lot of characters for this.

Little bit of an odd ending. Will there be more to King's story?

From what it looks like there isn't any reason to seek "Redemption", as doing so is basically just begging people who hate and abuse him to love him.

So he never actually did anything wrong. Then why is there this tripe about redemption?

This doesn't seem like it should even be in the story with the total lack of connection to anything else.

So Fluttershy is an idiot then. She makes a bowl of salad and puts it in front of him, but somehow that wasn't meant to him to eat, and causes him pain? Either shes a moron or just malicious.

Is there really any reason for him to be there other than get abused?

Why is he even trying to be friends with them? The only way they'll be happy is for him to be killed, so there's no point in staying in equestria at all.

So not only are the princesses evil, but the Element Bearers as well as the Elements themselves are Evil. The only conclusion is that Harmony is either fucking stupid or deliberately evil and malicious for harming him when he is innocent of wrongdoing.

So his entire story was pointless then. It just seems like a drawn out overcomplicated suicide.

10684103
because celestia is a bitch in this story... but i aint complaining

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