• Member Since 22nd Dec, 2017
  • offline last seen 8 hours ago

LilSlipsy


Comments ( 15 )

Abstract space incest sex.

this… unique take on the guidelines set out

It's a unique take. It also appears to be ineligible, on account of being 4000 words short of the minimum.

It was a really nice concept and I rather liked it. It kind of reminded me of Asimov's 'The Last Question' with an ageless, timeless existence floating alone in a dead universe until a distant memory inspires the recreation of life and a second big bang. Although that story had less incest, so this is objectively better.

I'd encourage you to expand on this story in order to meet the minimum word count that the contest dictates, because I think you could make a strong entry out of this. Really delve into Twilight's head and explore what it's like to outlive not just your friends, but everything else too. Maybe add some reflections on her and Shining's relationship, a slow rebuilding of memories she thought long since lost to time. And, of course, more metaphysical godpony incest space sex. Can never have too much of that.

Let's see if I got Twilight's progression right.

Unicorn.
Alicorn.
God Empress of Equestria
God Empress of the entire planet. And last but not least.

Ascended past even godhood to becoming truly omnipotent and omniscent (Basically Twilight merged with the universe, so now that even the death of the universe is just a minor thing, and is reborn because Twilight herself cannot die or be killed.)

If I read the last bit right, Twilight's also the Mother of Life, and the wellspring from where all life in all of existence comes from.

I'm overthinking this aren't I?

10560616
Glad you liked it!

10560694
The best kind

10560743
Eh, if you round up to the nearest 5,000 it's basically there.

10560778
Thanks and glad you enjoyed it. I would like to get to the minimum, but I do like where this story stands as of right now for a simple and short look at the far reaches of Twilight's immortality mixed in with a little incest of course. I'm just happy to contribute to the contest even if it is missing the girthy part. Who knows though, if I think of something to put down and expand upon this, there's always that possibility.

10560792
Essentially, yes. And I do love some overthinking :rainbowwild:

Time to become Faust, as it were ... :facehoof:

10560850
When push comes to shove, describe those words. More pushing, more shoving, more words.

> Here it would grow, safely orbiting around their blue parent star.

Umm, not for long if it’s a short-lived, highly-active blue star. I’d think Twilight would know her stellar physics better and pick a better host for her child.

Aside from that minor detail, I loved the story. I would also love to hear more of how she protected her children from asteroids or nearby supernovae or something as she watches them evolve and grow through the stages of life from microbes, through a Cambrian-like explosion, up to more and more complex beings.

Maybe her world will have another being who musters enough magical energy to join Twilight in eternity, helping her cover that blank canvass she described around her with life and love.

Hmm, on a second read-through I notice that the Blue Star is likely Shining Armor.

Interesting symbolism. I rescind my previous criticism.

🌌🎆🌠

10560743 10560778 10568043 10568080
I have added two more chapter on this and expanded on what happens after. It's now meets the 5,000 word guideline. :twilightsmile:

10568080
Thanks for enjoying it! Hope the next two chapters will go over some of that.

Okay, I did not expect a continuation for this.
But I'm glad I was wrong.

Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.


Also, if you want to reply to a previous comment make sure you put your reply in the same chapter as the comment you want to reply to.
Otherwise the author of the original comment won't receive an notification and most likely miss your reply.
(That's most likely the reason no one reacted to 10596770.)

Wow, for the first time in 8 years of reading pony fics, I have absolultely no idea how to react to or analyze a story. That is impressive.

10560743 10560778 10568043 10568080
Pinging again cause another user mentioned it might not send if I reply on a different chapter, so if you were already notified, let me know. Anyways, the second and third chapters are released. :pinkiehappy:

10600673
Thanks for the input, I tried sending another reply to see if it works. And I'm also glad you enjoyed the continuation of this! :twilightsmile:

10603615
Well hopefully that's a positive reaction, because I'm not sure how I should react to this comment. Thanks? :twilightsheepish:

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