• Member Since 12th Nov, 2011
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Dusty the Royal Janitor

Voted "Most Dead Inside": Class of 2008


It was another one of those days. You know the type... the kind where an omnipotent tomfool decides to invade your town and turn everything topsy-turvy. Rarity and her friends thought they would just have to break out the Elements of Harmony once again to take Discord down and bring back some normalcy. But when a shockwave of mysterious energy sends her to a world she's never known, twisting her perception of reality right down to her very body, she's going to need a lot more than some magic jewelry to bring any sense of normality back to her life.

It was another one of those days. You know the type... the kind where you have no obligations or responsibilities and the lack of things to do is just driving you insane with boredom. Will thought that he'd just spend another lazy day watching cartoons and playing video games and putting off getting a job some more. But when a mysterious girl with purple hair drops out of nowhere in front of his moving car, he's going to get a lot more than he bargained for when he learns that things previously thought to be fantasy may be more real than he ever imagined. And it's going to take a lot more than a trip to the psychiatrist's couch to bring any sense of normality back to his life.

A part of the PonyFall collab

Chapters (15)
Comments ( 566 )

Hey, uh... 2 things before I read:
#1: Didn't most of the staff ban the ponyfall series?
#2: Didn't someone already do Rarity?

After reading: Well, it's well written, I'll give it that. But it is just not my schtick.

Good luck, I seems you now have the torch I was once burdened with.


It wasn't banned, but it had to be re-worked on request of the staff. We do exist, though.

We were having author problems with Rarity, so we now have a new one.

Well, this will be just dandy. Love the story and will thumb it up.

Yes the rarity ponyfall is back, and it is now complete. Ponyfall I mean, this one is just starting

And suddenly things are made extremely awkward with the title alone.:trixieshiftright:

Awesome work, Dusty!

wanna read more


It wasn't banned. It did, however, have to go through some severe editing. It's much smaller now, and the parameters for the stories put out are much stricter.
And yes, that would be Garion who had Rarity. He had to stop though. I don't really know the details.


Thank you :twilightsmile:


Thanks. I actually didn't think of the potential awkward implications of the title until last night long after I had submitted it. It's actually named after 1981 Stevie Nicks song, and I meant for it to reference both fashion and the rather opposite spectrum of personality and style that the two main characters have.


Wait... you mean that all the main six spots are filled up and the collab is actually stable for once? :rainbowhuh:

*checks the group*

It is! :pinkiegasp:

I don't see this lasting long. :trollestia:

Ermerhgerd can you see the future!:pinkiegasp:

Pretty good so far!

; D

Followed and stuff~

Congratulations Dusty, I look forward to more chapters!

1193592 They had some writers, but some of them couldn't hack it, so they decided they'd have a bit of a competition for the spot of Rarity in the collab.

28 likes, 0 dislikes
*Tips Hat
Welcome to the good books

The guy that was doing Rarity cancelled his, so this is a fresh start.

It's finally here!

I think I deserve more than the title of 'That guy' to be honest.

Why didn't you tell me you had this up? :pinkiegasp: Adding this to my reading list!

Leather and lace?


I was hoping to get chapter 1 up before I told you, but chapter 1 is still in editing purgatory. Sorry about that :twilightblush:

1200841 No biggie. I'm eager to see what happens next!

Also, Tom with a bow tie and bouquet is one of the funniest mental images I've ever had. Thank you for that. :rainbowlaugh:

I second MrBackpack! Awesome job so far! Keep it going! :raritystarry:

:raritycry: ...and thats how i lost my sense of hearing LOL cant wait for the next chapter

Yeah, she made him deaf with her screaming. He's gonna have one hell of a hard time calming her down-*Boromir interrupts* "One does not simply calm Rarity down"-Thank you Boromir, now shut up. All I can say is:

For some reason, no matter how long the chapters are in a story, they always end too soon.

As long as you work on moar, we will be happy.

Or else... :pinkiehappy:

A new chapter!
Oh, wait. I already read this during editing. :derpytongue2:
Nice to see you ironed out the mistakes.

lol YAY!! more,please?

1218506 Sorry, but weren't you brown nosing in our IRC trying to get a better chance at getting Rarity? I find this pretty pathetic, "I DIDN'T GET HER SO I'LL DISLIKE AND TROLL THE GUY WHO DID". Also it IS a collab, doesn't that mean the plot will be carried over.
Troll Level: Ironic Fail

1218506 Curious... Weren't you one of the people who applied for Rarity?

Seeing as you didn't even pass the first hurdle of the application process, I highly doubt you could have come up with anything more "original" than what Dusty has written. In fact, I doubt you could even write something half as good as Draequine's story, and we all know how bad that is.

So, in conclusion:


It would be rather ironic (and a violation of this site's rules) if the one down-vote on the story came from a jealous Rarity hopeful who is annoyed that he didn't get the position.

I think I might have a look and see who changed their up-vote to a down-vote on my own story. Wouldn't it be something if it was the same person?

I was reading this and I couldn't help but think, "Seriously? You name your computer?"
Then I read the logic behind it to yell "KHAAAAAAAAN!" everytime it screws up. THAT. IS. FREAKING. GENIUS.

Umm... Why is the description copied over twice? Glitch or something? I dunno, but you may want to fix that.

That being said...



Take a second look at the description. Look closer than just a few sentences. It might surprise you. :raritywink:


XD Looks like he didn't like being outed as a jealous, butthurt little kid and went and deleted his comment. Thanks for sticking up for me, fellas :twilightsmile:


Oh shoot! My bad! Guess I gotta stop skimming over descriptions...:twilightblush:

1226052 Because Friendship is MAGIC!

the humor of the last line was top notch.

I'll admit, considering Rarity's usual dramatic antics, her shrieking must be "wake-the-damn-dead" loud.

1226052 You honestly think you rule the day on your high horse? Well I have one more thing to say to all of the Ponyfall writers. And its one last honest opinion before I finish up my business with you guys. I'm going to post it soon here since I don't wanna rejoin a group I don't fancy such as Ponyfall. That's the last thing you'll hear of me. If you wanna read it then check for it where I just notified you to.:ajbemused: Bring your friends for an opinion if you want to

To the Ponyfall writers and editors:

This is the guy who you're all looking down upon. The one who you flamed for that last comment I made on "PonyFall: Leather and Lace".

I was greatly supported by a friend to candidate for this collaboration project since he himself was quite assured that I'd get the spot since he thought my talent to make a story fun and interesting would be enough. But when he realized that I didn't get the position, all the circumstances surrounding it and that I got flamed for it, he motivated me to not take it like a bi*** and have my final word which is in this comment.

Now let me get started by saying I'm disappointed in all of you Ponyfall people. I thought you were cool fun loving people that really loved writing these series for the fun of it even though there were some geeky things about you. But there were several things that absolutely ticked me off about all of you that completely struck me! I felt absolutely betrayed by your false intentions of finding awesome people for your team.

Now before you put this on the answering machine being like "You mad, you butthurt, you jelly" well, yes I am quite angry about it. And why shouldn't I be? You didn't even give me a chance! You Didn't even allow me and many more, incredibly capable authors to write their own versions of this fic.

Mr. Slorg proved to me after his last comment that he was a business man who was looking for a "person to employ" that would treat this as work, cutting out all the fun. He prefered to pick out the most nerdy writer that must perform "a job that requires team cooperation to go smoothly". Well let me tell him that this is a nonprofit site and nobody gets paid here! Therefore anybody who treats this as "work" kills all the creative spirit out of everybody else.

All the other Ponyfallians treated me as "a baby who didn't get his lolly". Well let's just say I can't stand nerds who play games all day like children, overdramatize about fictional characters and think they're awesome for staying cooped up in their imaginary world!

Unlike nerds I treat Mlp and fanfiction writing as a hobby for my spare time and do not get too attached to stuff that is fictional. But I am not as hell gonna take it lying down to a bunch of Melvins!

Let me rewrite some of the things I remember writing about the first time I read Dusty the Royal Janitor's fic(with some other things added). I simply cannot believe that some super-nerd took the spot for this story! It seems Slorg chose with his eyes closed and picked whoever was the nerdiest bestest worker! When I read about how Mr. Janitor named his car, computer and about his Batman pajamas, Pony t-shirt (total overkill), I couldn't believe how lame that was! Why does every Ponyfall author has to be a nerd?

I'd like to ask you: Does it has to be this way? Do nerds have to win every time even though they do not deserve it, points being:

They do not take care of their bodies and face and yet have high standarts for girls;

They hate on every other opinion that doesn't match theirs and constantly bend their own rules and principles to their liking;

They pipe up "You suck! Why if I had my way with you!" but then if you raise your fist at them they cringe in fear;

They constantly nag on you with stuff you aren't into (like video games) whether you like it or not... and so on...

So, people of Ponyfall! Why pick a person who acts like the generic nerd pretending to have morals?

That sums up my honest opinion, no trolling intended. And with that I bid you all Adieu! FOREVER!

PS: Oh, and btw this wasn't about me not getting the spot anymore. It was about putting you nerds in your place


Okay, first off, I don't know about you, but my definition of "acting like a bitch" is opposing a comment which is entirely justified and misconstruing its meaning. Might I remind you that you actually removed your comment after being told why you were wrong. If that's not a sign that someone knows they were wrong, I don't know what is.

"your false intentions of finding awesome people for your team" So, you're implying that you are awesome, and the rest of us are not? You are incredibly pompous and hypocritical. I bet you thought there was no chance you could lose, that you were the best applicant by far. This was probably one of the reasons you weren't chosen.

"You Didn't even allow me and many more, incredibly capable authors to write their own versions of this fic." You do realise this is a collaboration, right? You could be J.K. Rowling for all we care, but if you don't get along with the other authors, what hope is there for you actually working with them?

We want this collaboration to run as smoothly and efficiently as possible, so a working environment helps that along. And who says we don't have fun doing it? We only ask you post consistently, but we aren't ruthless. We won't force you to do it if you have a good reason not to.

Let's face it; you are acting like a "baby who didn't get his lolly". You're just further proving it with actions like these.

"Well let's just say I can't stand nerds who play games all day like children, overdramatize about fictional characters and think they're awesome for staying cooped up in their imaginary world!" You are on a fanfiction site for My Little Pony. By your standards, you must hate yourself quite a bit.

"I'd like to ask you: Does it has to be this way?" First of all; have. You've just given another reason why you weren't chosen. And yes, it does. We are all nerds. Why would we read stories about big, tough bullies acting the way they do towards the mane six? It's realistic, but it's not something people want to read.

By all means, write your own Ponyfall-like story.
Will it be good? Who knows. Based on your description, probably not.

Have fun with what ever it is you're doing.


I'm neither a writer nor an editor for the collab. In fact, if your comment hadn't been so vitriolic, I would've simply kept on going. However, when your personal feeling of insult towards others turns into generic stereotyping and insulting of a very large group of people, it's simply ridiculous. I won't go into detail on some of the really obvious flaws, such as saying that flinching is "cringing in fear," even though it's an instinctual reaction for self-preservation, but I will comment on one bit: "pretending to have morals."

By your words, nerds pretend to think harming people indiscriminately is wrong, even though you're the one threatening them with such harm? They pretend to be respectable human beings that don't throw insults left and right? They pretend to back away from fighting because it would just cause a heap of unnecessary trouble? What I find immoral is that you would take such a bold attempt to dehumanize them by stripping them of their morality, thus freeing you from feeling any sort of empathy toward them.

1264380 I just saw this, and I must say you prove once again why you weren't chosen.

Over thirty people applied for Rarity, meaning at least thirty people were rejected. At least twenty four didn't get to the interview process, just like you. Out of all those people, you are the only one to throw a tantrum and reduce yourself to a babbling puddle of infancy by hurling grade school insults our way. Why weren't you chosen? Because I could immediately tell that you were full of yourself and would not get along with anyone. You have proven me correct time and time again.

At +83, -2, it looks like I know what I'm doing when it comes to choosing writers. Congratulations Dusty for not only being a skilled writer, but also being a pleasant individual. I called it right.

Now, back to you, danail24. You claim I wanted someone who would treat this as work. Incorrect. I'm the only one who has to treat anything like work, because as this is a collaboration, it takes a fair amount of work to ensure everything runs smoothly. I also don't see Dusty complaining that I'm cracking any whips or forcing him to do anything he doesn't want to do. While your supposed concern for my writers is appreciated, I should remind you that I am more than capable of taking care of them. Thanks anyway.

Your next statement seems to imply that all the other PonyFall writers are nerds for calling you out on your bullshit. Some of them probably are. We're on a website dedicated to writing about ponies. No shit that's going to attract nerds. By attempting to use that term as an insult, you've just insulted the vast majority of the fan base. Nice going, Sherlock. This nerd right here happens to be happily married with two children and pulls in over $50,000 a year, so I've earned the right to sit on my ass whenever I want and play games or write about ponies. I can do that in-between sessions of working out and making out with my amazing wife.

The next bit of your comment seems to just be more incoherent rambling about nerds in general. Apparently they don't take care of their bodies and run in terror if you raise a fist at them or something. I can only assume you're still in school, because the real world doesn't work like that. There's no point even discussing this part because of how utterly ignorant it is.

TL:DR - You're precisely the person I thought you were, and that's why you weren't chosen. Have fun being angry over fictional ponies.

*Facepalms* Why can't people stop whining about a fanfic and just enjoy it? :trixieshiftleft:

1296397 Long story man, long story

Hey everybody. Author here! Thanks for the overwhelming positive response on this story so far! I'm very flattered that, despite one or two hiccups with certain users, this seems to be a popular entry into the PonyFall collab! :pinkiehappy:

I'd also like to apologize that this chapter took so long. I honestly didn't intend for it to. In fact, it's been basically done and sitting on the shelf for the past few weeks. The only reason it wasn't posted is because the whole collab was basically put on hold for the past while and I wasn't exactly sure I had the go-ahead to post it. Luckily I've already started chapter 3, so hopefully it'll be done sooner rather than later.

That said, I do have another story I'm hoping to write. It's a Halloween story, so I'd like to get on that soon. It shouldn't be particularly long, a few chapters at most. It may or may not happen (or if it does happen, it may or may not happen by the 31st)

I've also been told that I should talk about the chapter titles from now on. I figured it'd be neat to have the chapter titles be the names of songs. No particular reason why other than I thought it would be neat, really, but I've been told I should link to the songs that are referenced. So here are the two songs:

Goodbye Blue Sky by Pink Floyd
I'm Going Slightly Mad by Queen

Anyway, hope you enjoyed the chapter, and stay tuned for Chapter 3 :twilightsmile:

And then several pints of half-digested ice cream were forcibly ejected upon me.

Man dats gotta be disgustin.

Better than fully-digested ice cream, I suppose.:raritydespair:

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