• Member Since 4th May, 2017
  • offline last seen April 18th

Cackling Moron


"Fluff" in the same way what collects under the sofa is fluff.

Comments ( 37 )

Screwing followed, though not quite in the manner Chrysalis might initially have suspected or hoped for.

:rainbowlaugh:

Man, I cannot get enough of your absolutely delightful style of writing.

I came into this wondering how he was going to convince her to turn herself into a screwdriver. This went even further as a display of masterfully lackadaisical improvisation.

10536239
You know, it entirely slipped my mind she could do that if she wanted to, probably. Huh. What a brainfart.

Now I'm picturing her turning into Megatron's gun form, for some reason.

This is a completely legitimate scenario. No questions need to be asked (none at all) the Swiss Army knife/changeling queen stock shall rise, all shall profit.

As always, hilarious perfection.

Fun fact: IKEA designed a shelter for the UN that could be fully assembled with just one tool, a “hammer”.

Man these puns are killing me!
In a good way
Also
Much faster way to assemble a cabinet
Use a screwdriver
Of the sonic variety
;)

Huh.
That's certainly something.
Always good to have such an "multitool" at hand.

Good story!
I enjoyed redaing it.

Hahaha. Awesome

10537440
Someone's barrel's getting polished

IfyouknowwhatImsayin

Hm. Looks fairly interesting. I'll add this to my read later.

As I share the name of the human in this story, I heartily approve. Excellent story.

Needs a sex tag

Everything about this story, in pretty much every way, is just super amazing! I couldn't tell ya how many times I had a good laugh from this and the sauciness made it all even better! I hope ya didn't mind, but I simply HAD to make a reading of this saucy story of yours!

Audio Linky!~: https://youtu.be/ddNzpZbTG6k

(I don't mean to offend anyone with this comment in any way!)

“Serves me right, really…” he said to himself, reflecting on his poor life choices. Or, rather, his more recent poor life choices. There were lots to choose from but the older ones weren’t really relevant right then.

I choose to believe that this is a Left 4 Dead crossover. (Note: Everything we know about Keith was pre-zombie, where he was basically the opposite of Paul Bunyan)

"Let's see: 'Insert Tab A into Slot B; Screw in place.'"
"Wrong hole, you idiot!"

Yep. Definitely needs the PORN tag. :trollestia:

:rainbowlaugh:

The one thing that keeps bugging me, no pun intended, is that he doesn't have any tools in the house. None. That's... just so hard to fathom. If there's one thing a guy would have in the house, it's tools and a flashlight. Ok, two things. Two things you'll always find in any house with a human male living there. A tool and a flashlight. Granted, it might be a rusty hammer or an oversized chipped flathead (used as a chisel by the previous rusty hammer) and one of those ancient flashlights with an actual bulb in it that can't compete with an angry lightning bug... but it's there!

You go to any guy's house and I guarantee you'll find at least a half dozen flashlights and a pile of tools heavy enough to stun an ox.

p.s. Awesome story, loads of laughs. Giving it three out of three mutant thumbs up.

I would also like to level screw and mount the queen of the changelings.


10539476
I own at least 4 hammers and 12 screwdrivers. This is deeply confusing to me as I have never *purchased* either a hammer or a screwdriver. Mallet yes, bit driver yes, sledge even. These are all things I have purchased, but never a hammer, never a screwdriver.

I have ultimately concluded that a sufficiently large accumulation of tools simply spawns the things.



I have purchased flashlights. Not my favorite though. Found that one on the ground.

Interesting idea. Attach a changeling to a carabiner and hang it on your belt as a good multi-tasker like an Equestrian army knife. I only got as far as envisioning her standing around the drinks cooler with a big pile of bottle caps around her legs.

I question how helpful a screwdriver that weighs double digits would be.

Well, weird boner at the end say,"You did a great job"!:moustache:

You magnificent bastard.

Lel, that was great.

The screwed man discovered a screwy screwdriver he could screw the screws with, and then screwed the screwdriver silly!

Now I know where Ellis got stories from his buddy Keith

10695297
I pointed this out too; ending up in another universe with a psychopathic ex-ruler crushing on him is just a regular day for that Keith.

I decided to read this at complete random, and I was immediately reminded why I love your delightful writing style, and its ability to turn any mundanity into something hilarious through the power of a fun narrator.

Hahahahahaha I get it
Building a display/cabinet with a screwdriver. If only he had a sonic one probably would have been even easier

10982597
Doesn't work on wood, sadly.

10982598
Really should have a setting for that. Otherwise it’s just plain embarrassing

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