Trixie is Pregnant and It's Twilight's Problem

by TheCrimsonDM

Chapter Nineteen: Of Shotguns and Weddings

Trixie is Pregnant

Chapter Nineteen: Of Shotguns and Weddings

Written by TheCrimsonDM

Trixie wasn’t complaining having a beautiful mare help her into a wedding gown. What she was complaining about was this absurd scenario she found herself thrust in. “Are you positive this is a just a practice wedding?”

Rarity fastened the straps on Trixie’s back. “Of course, Darling.”

Trixie still felt uneasy about this. “Then why, pray tell, is Twilight not partaking and instead we are using Big Mac?”

“Because Twilight is a little preoccupied with her sudden nap.”

Trixie wasn’t sure if she was willing to believe all of this but she did know one thing. She was being fawned upon and that was more than enough reason for her to believe in Rarity and Applejack’s absurd need to practice a wedding. Trixie was far from certain she would actually partake in one but the attention never hurt.

Using Applejack’s room being used for the dressing room was probably not the best choice because it was a bit small and smelled far too much of sweat. Rarity seemed to have completely lost any sense of smell the moment wedding was mentioned. That or the fact that the bed, after a good sniff, turned out to smell faintly of Rarity, implied the sweat was partially hers to begin with. Now, what would cause those two to sweat all over the bed? Trixie could only wonder.

Of course Applejack had dragged Big Mac off to his room, one she recognized from sight alone even if it had been rather dark the last time she was inside it. She wondered if after this practice wedding here might be a practice honeymoon as well. She would enjoy that sort of practice very much.

It wouldn’t be long now before she was brought out in full glory to whoever they’d managed to grab for this practice wedding. Her audience awaited her stunning beauty and brilliance. Oh how clever Rarity and Applejack must be to do a practice wedding… at least assuming they were to be believed. These ponies were not exactly the most sane.

Once the preparations were complete a small knock at the door, coming from a tiny foal with bright red hair, was the signal they needed to began. Trixie was walked side by side with Rarity as they made their way through the simple yet warming home, down the stairs and then led to the backdoor where she saw much to her surprise several pews already set up, with an alter set up on the gazebo. Oh, this place made for a wonderful wedding. Not too many ponies though.

Big Mac was there, dressed up in a fine tuxedo that seemed to complement his muscular and large form rather well. Oh, he did look fine in that suit. Practice was a good idea after all. Applebloom walked ahead of them tossing flowers this way and that. For their audience they had another small filly, this one looking a lot more like Rarity, it was probably Rarity’s child from some unknown teenage lover.

Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash were there as well sitting in the pews next to one another. Pinkie was just behind them grinning like this was the best day of her life. A pretty decently sized audience for her current performance.

Once Trixie was led up the aisle, all eyes rightfully on her she found herself on the alter standing in front of Big Mac. She smiled. “Trixie supposed practice extends to the honeymoon portion as well?” she gave him a wink.

He swallowed and his eyes darted wildly from an old green mare who looked less like an apple and more like a pickle, to Applejack. Applejack shot him a dirty look then a kinder one to the old mare. “Granny Smith, would you like to start. We’re on a bit of a deadline here so let’s do the quick version.”

Granny Smith let out a sigh. “Ah’d wished we had a proper wedding this time around. Guess we can always do another one later.”

Applejack hurried her on. “Yes yes, now quickly before Twilight shows up.”

Trixie looked at her. “We are just practicing are we not?”

Applejack made a sour expression. “Um… no. This is a real wedding.”

As the shock, and soon to follow horror hit Trixie, Granny Smith began. “We’re here to lawfully wed these two ponies. Big Macintosh, do you, take Trixie, to be yer lawfully wedded wife until death due you part?”

Big Mac shook his head. “Nope.”

Applejack growled. “Too bad, you don’t get a choice.”

Granny Smith looked at Trixie. “Trixie, do you, take Big Macintosh, to be yer lawfully wedded husband until death due you part?”

Trixie looked at Applejack. “No?”

Applejack shook her head. “Wrong answer.”

Granny Smith closed the book. “Unless any other ponies have any objections, Ah now pronounce you two-“

***

Spike was holding on for dear life to Twilight’s mane as Twilight teleported as fast as she possibly could toward Applejack’s house but the stress was making her magic a bit less sturdy than normal. So she could only teleport a mile or so at a time. This not only made it challenging to hold on, but he was getting a little teleport sick from it too.

Spike was shouting between teleports. “Do, you, even, have, a, plan?”

Twilight shouted back. “NO! I do not have a plan, but I know they are taking Trixie away!”

“Away from who?”

“From me!”

Spike was quiet a moment. They were finally out of Ponyville Proper and in the woods. Applejack’s place couldn’t be much further now but Twilight’s horn was sparking. The last attempt at a teleport fizzled at the tip of her horn. Spike gently patted the back of her head. “Twilight, they can’t take her away from you if you don’t like her.”

Twilight shot a look back. “I think I do! We kissed last night, and she listened to me talk about my feelings and didn’t judge me and when I was scared about how ponies are afraid of me she came up next to me and cuddled me.”

“And then wet the bed if I remember correctly.”

“She’s pregnant, she can get away with that.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “I didn’t know bladder control was an issue with pregnant mares.”

“It can be, it’s part of silent heat. I don’t know if Trixie has it, I haven’t checked. I might have to later, presuming I get there fast enough to still have a chance to look!”

Twilight took off in a gallop considering her horn had failed to work for her. She was galloping as fast as she could and Spike also noticed that she was moving quite a bit faster than he’d ever seen her run. She must have been serious about this but why was she trying so hard to stop this? It wasn’t like she had never tried to date somepony before-

Spike stood on top of her back. “Hurry Twilight, they’re going to marry her to Big Mac if we don’t stop them!”

“You’re on my side now?”

“Let’s be honest, you and Celestia was never going to happen, no matter how cute it was. This is the first time you’ve shown any interest in the idea of dating. If it gets you to stop being such a loner, and stop writing those creepy stories about your mentor, your friends, and your brother, than we should get there as soon as equinely possible.” In fact he had an idea on how to make Twilight run faster.

He walked over to her rump looked at her tail and spat a small ball of fire. The end of Twilight’s tail caught flame and the look Twilight gave him was one of utter horror before she gave a yelp and began running faster still. It seemed she just barely had enough air in her lungs to yell, “Despite being a smart idea, I’m going to kill you for this once I rescue Trixie!”

They ran.

At one point Twilight even went off road to take a short cut. After all the time the two had spent working on these trees and helping Applejack with farming duty they knew this place in and out. This was a sure fire way straight to the Sweet Apple Acers that cut a couple miles off the road.

***

Twilight was moving at a fast gallop for nearly two minutes before breaking free. There was the wedding. Everypony was there. Twilight noticed everypony stop and stare at her as she came running in. She knew what she looked like. Eyes panicked, tail on fire, horn sparking and fizzling. Twilight was clearly ready to cause bodily harm if needed to get what she wanted.

She slid to a stop in front of the alter. Misplaced her speed and ran headfirst into the gazebo. Luckily doing no damage to it but her horn was stuck for a moment. She pulled it out and left a sizable hole in the wood as a result. “I OBJECT!”

Applejack shot back. “You can’t do that.”

“Yes I can, and I am!”

“On what grounds?”

Twilight stood up and felt Spike nearly fall off as he had to grab onto Twilight’s mane to stay up. “On the grounds that I LOVE HER!”

Several gasps filled the area and Applejack stared right into Twilight’s eyes. “Are… are you sure?”

Twilight glared at her. Then looked over at Trixie who looked absolutely beautiful in that dress. The mare was staring down at her with wide lavender eyes. “I’m sure.”

Trixie sat down. “Oh… oh, Twilight. I uh… this is awkward.”

Twilight blinked. “You… were you wanting to marry Big Mac?”

Trixie shook her head. “No, I just hadn’t gotten around to asking you myself if you loved me or not. I asked Fluttershy and Big Mac if they did but they said no. You said you do love Trixie so… Trixie chooses you.”

Twilight stared at her. “Choose me for what?”

Trixie smiled. “Trixie chooses you, to have Trixie love you.”

“I… what?”

Trixie rolled her eyes. “You are quite simple sometimes. Trixie just said, Trixie loves you, Twilight.”

Twilight sat down. “Oh, good. I don’t really know what I would have done if you rejected me. I might have blown us all up honestly.”

Trixie swallowed. “R-really?”

Spike replied. “She nearly killed herself getting here to stop this.”

Trixie jumped up and squeed. A motion Twilight was not used to seeing form the mare. “Oh my gosh, you must really love Trixie to do such a wonderful, horrible thing. Trixie promises that so long as you love her like that, she will stay by your side.”

Trixie looked over to Big Mac. “Trixie is sorry, maybe if you are still interested in sharing she might-“

Twilight shot a look at her that made it clear that whatever Trixie was about to say needed to stop. She was already frantic from a few days of absolute and uncontrolled chaos. There was no way in tartarus she was sharing Trixie with anyone else. Well… maybe Celestia… probably.

Trixie stepped down from the gazebo and wrapped her forelegs around Twilight. “Thank you for rescuing your princess in distress.”

Twilight wrapped a leg around Trixie’s waist drawing her closer. “If I am the hero here, what do I get for it?”

Trixie met Twilight’s eyes. “A gift for my beautiful hero?” She leaned forward and gently pressed her lips against Twilight’s. “How is that?”

Twilight swallowed. “I’ll take that for now.”

Granny Smith gave Applejack and Big Mac both the stink eye. “So, which one of you should be the one in trouble over this?”

Applejack covered her face with her hat. “Ah… probably should. Ah reckon Ah knew Twilight might like her but thought if’n we were fast enough we could beat her to the punch and have some new foals on the farm.”

Trixie looked over at Applejack. “Well, as crazy as you may be, Trixie does still intend to let the father be the father. She has no intentions on stealing away a child from him. Who would be so cruel?”

Applejack mouthed wordlessly. “Seriously?”

Trixie smiled. “Trixie truly is generous isn’t she?”

Twilight gave Trixie a small squeeze. “Come on, even you know that was rude.”

“She did just try to trick and then force Trixie into a marriage. She feels some rudness is well accounted for.”

Rarity stood off to the side holding a bouquet. “Well… there goes the big plan…”

Like a bolt of pink lightning. Pinkie disappeared from her seat behind Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy. Ran up to Rarity and kicked the bouquet into the air. It flew high, high into the air. A good thirty or so feet. It was almost like she had practiced the move for ages as she turned around and eyed Rainbow Dash. “Betcha ain’t fast enough to catch that.”

Rainbow Dash grinned. “Oh really?”

Rainbow Dash flew into the air snatched the bouquet and then landed back next to Fluttershy. “Oh, look at that! Owned!”

Rarity looked at Rainbow Dash and then at Fluttershy. “Well now, Rainbow Dash. I didn’t know you wanted to be married so much. I wonder if there is a shy, yellow pegasus who might want to marry you?”

Rainbow Dash’s face contorted as if she was trying to process something and it was taking a lot more work than it really should have. The expression almost looked painful before it relaxed and then fell. Rainbow Dash’s face grew pale. “The bouquet… I caught it.” She looked over at Fluttershy. “Does that mean I have to get married now?”

Fluttershy looked up at her. “Oh… um… I… I think so.”

“But… but who’s going to marry me? I don’t think I know anypony.” She was grabbing at her mane with her free hoof. “Ahhh, why did Pinkie do this?”

Fluttershy reached out and gently put a hoof over Rainbow Dash’s lips to shush her. “I um… I-I know you d-don’t know anypony but um… I-I would… if um.. if you want… and you don’t find anypony you want to marry before… um..”

Rainbow Dash wrapped her forelegs around Fluttershy dragging her into an embrace. “You just made a promise and I am not letting you break it.”

Fluttershy was frozen for a moment but embraced her back. “Okay.”

Rarity sat down. “Well… that was-“

“Exactly according to plan!” Pinkie finished for her. “Yeppers. Of course they’re gonna be really awkward once they realize that married couples have sex.”

Sweetie Belle stood up and asked. “What’s sex?”

The level of power behind the smack that went into the back of Pinkie’s head was enough to force the mare to go into the dirt face first and leave her legs sticking up at awkward angles. Pinkie Pie replied. “Oh, sorry, forgot she was here.”

Rarity’s hoof was actually smoking from the force of the blow. She blew on it. “I still won’t forgive you for this. Now I get to have that talk with my sister. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

Both Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash must have heard as well because the way their faces were turning bright red as they attempted to look at each other but were looking away every few seconds made them look both entirely too innocent. Twilight was content with this situation. Now she could at least look at her new marefriend. Wait, were they dating now? A confession of love didn’t have to necessarily mean that did it? Oh… this was going to be weird. She needed to set up some charts and graphs immediately and figure out where they stood now and how it was going to work.

For now, she mostly just laid into Trixie’s embrace and closed her eyes. “Twilight is tired.”

Trixie rubbed at Twilight’s shoulder and replied. “Well Trixie is the best at being a pillow as well, so go ahead and rest, Trixie will watch you.”

“That’s creepy… thank you.”

“And Trixie promises not to vomit on you this time.”

Twilight opened an eye. “I assumed that alrea-“

The green look on Trixie’s face made it all to clear this was a promise that was not going to last. Well… things were more or less what Twilight was coming to expect from her new life so that was something…

***

Somewhere far far away from the new couples, sat a Draconequus in a throne made from rocks, glass, gold, and the skin of a very much still alive giant bat. The throne was actually strapped to its back as it flew through a dimension filled with floating islands, destroyed castles, ruins that time had forgotten and eldritch beasts of time immortal.

Next to him sat an alicorn princess of the sun who was busy sipping at her tea and watching the television screen showing the events of said loving mares after a failed wedding. “Interesting, but why are you showing me all of this?”

Discord sipped at his tea, drinking the glass instead of the liquid. “I thought you might find the events of these past few days entertaining. Even though I cut out some of the more interesting bits.”

“You say that but you left the part where Trixie had pleasured herself on my student’s bed.”

“I said interesting, not whatever that was.”

“If you say so… but after my misunderstanding of the situation you decided to show me this. Why?”

Discord looked at her. “Well, I thought you might have some ideas. If your student is to be wed, wouldn’t you want to know ahead of time. Especially since she’s marrying a mare who is already with child.”

Celestia’s eyes widened. “I’m just confused, out of anypony, she had to choose her to love… wait did you have anything to do with this?”

Discord laughed. “Who me? Couldn’t be. At least I didn’t do anything bad this time. Let’s not forget, romance is probably the most chaotic force in the universe, and I am no strange to chaos my dear Celestia. No stranger at all.”

Celestia closed her eyes. “This is going to be a fine mess isn’t it?”

“If it wasn’t could you call it a love story?”

END OF PART 1

Comments

[HeBogin]

Discord laughed. “Who me? Couldn’t be. At least I didn’t do anything bad this time. Let’s not forget, romance is probably the most chaotic force in the universe, and I am no strange to chaos my dear Celestia. No stranger at all.”

I get strange vibes from this paragraph...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ

[Arago]

I loved it and will certainly enjoy the next part when it comes out.

[resonance]

Man, the first few chapters of this were majestic

Then it went into high gear and shit went by quick

I didn't really enjoy the sub-romances, good fun tho

[Kessie_amarra]

Thanks for the fic so far!

[PonySage86]

This was really fun to read through, A delightful tale of comedy and madness. I felt the end was a little rushed though on the other hand I suppose there was no need to drag things out. It leaves me very curious where things could go from here and what shinanagens and drama may follow.

I eagerly await part two, keep up the amazing work.

[HiddenEntity]

I'm sorry...

PART 1???

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

[Prince Leviathan]

All according to plan.

More or less

[TheAlienBrony22]

“If it wasn’t could you call it a love story?”

Discord is right for once? What?

and he wasn't even in this whole first part of the story?! Double What?!