Local human, Anon, is a pretty normal guy. He goes to work, comes home, hangs around his apartment until bed, eats, sleeps, and repeats. Sometimes, he even spices things up and hangs out with his friends.
One day, his friends notice something. . . off about him.
I. . . I don't even know what this is. Enjoy?
Also, I just wanted to say I'm not trying to make fun of anybody what with could be called an anglo-derivative accent. I just thought it would be funny to take it to the extreme.
"Oh Jesus fucking Christ!"
"Hm? What is it dear?"
"I had a nightmare."
"Oh? What was it about?"
"I was sent to Equestria with nothing. Not even you."
"Uh huh?"
"The worst part. . . I was British!"
"Oh fucking Christ! What a damn horrible dream! Here, let me hold you tonight."
11/10.
careful now, too many "Wuts all this about"s and you'll summon the Equestria Short Story Critique Squad of Trottland Yard (the flying buckets!) to break up this whole thing under the Too-Cleched-Skits Act.
I have no idea why Anonymous fancies himself a British constable, but I can't argue with the results.
You had a golden opportunity, this is Fluttershy we are talking about after all, and you didn’t take it. I am so disappointed. In concept however, this is excellent.
10526264
In his defense, doing a fake British accent for no reason is pretty addictive. It's more fun the worse it sounds.
Just wait until he has to tell Apple jack that the crossbeams gone out askew on the treadle!!
10527130
I*cough*totally didn't plan*cough cough* to use that line. . . at all. Nope, not even a little bit.
Oi moight! Ow'd jah know ah was bri-ish!?
i.pinimg.com/originals/8c/7b/05/8c7b050b8a977b061bd851b5a5ebefe7.jpg
10527130
what does that mean IN ENGLISH?
10527382
I don't know! Mister Wentworth just told me to come in here and say there was trouble at the mill, that's all! I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition!
10527390
If this becomes a series, I will love it. This was hysterical.
Roighty oh den, ta th’ next un.
10527424
I EXPECT THE SPANISH INQUISITION!!! YOU SHOULD ALWAYS EXPECT THE SPANISH INQUISITION!
10527371
The fact that your teeth were worse than mine, since that's where the actual accent comes from apparently.
10528931
Wouldn't surprise me in the slightest everybody in Britain talks like they've had a stroke.
10528934
Wait you're supportively agreeing with me?
WHY ARE YOU SUPPORTIVELY AGREEING WITH ME?
10528967
Because I'm American and Irish and I hate the English. Come out Ye Black and Tans.
10528969
My dads the same way.
10528969
This man gets it
... a policeman's lot is not an appy one, nappy one!
I am confused and amuses.
10528934
American accents are whiny and high pitched. Listening to them gives me a headache.
10564620
Okay? And British accents sound unintelligent and pretentious. Listening to them gives me a headache too.
10564690
You're just an Anglophobe.
10564709
And your an Ameriphobe. And nobody's scared of the British.
10564711
I don't hate America or Americans. And people not being scared of us doesn't bother me. Why should it? But I wouldn't expect a teenager to understand. DM me of you want to continue this discussion as I've no interest in littering the comments with a discussion not relevant to the story.
10564709
OH GOD IT'S AN ANGLO-SAXON PLEASE DON'T HURT ME I'M SCARED I'M SCARED
10564711
I believe I made my point clear.
Update date?
10570223
Finals are killing me right now. Otherwise, this story would be done already. After next Wednesday, expect updates.
10570290
Very well.
10528969
eyyyy -whistles kinky boots-
It might not be all too comedic, but its just the wholesome and relaxed tone i needed to properly end my day.
I love the comedy and mystical status of Anon as a seemingly super constable. That coupled with the written accent with the kings english makes me wanna come back for even more
KEEP WRITING!
They should consider themselves lucky that he didn't turn into a cop like dirty Harry.
Have him go into Sugar Cube corner for breakfast and ask for sausage, egg, bacon, beans, mushrooms, fried slice, black pudding, and hot sweet milky tea.
I look forward to seeing Pinkie’s reaction to the concept of black pudding. Or Steak and kidney pudding if you do it as lunch instead, with lots of lovely suet. Things to make your arteries go clang.
Whu... what the fuck just happened in this chapter?
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i.redd.it/4nxc6eljq4p51.png
Strange mornings are strange.
10569123
Anglophobe doesn’t mean you’re scared of them, it just means you’re intolerant or mock them. Same as homophobe or transphobe.
10595001
Pinkie watched a man drink tea for 2/3 of an hour.
Well done. Sadly sugarcube corner isn’t a greasy spoon. There’s nothing quite like breadcrumbs and suet in a medium of pigs blood. It is an official superfood after all.
10595066
Well I politely disagree on the grounds that every time I hear a song by Henry Enfield when I leave my phone on shuffle, I run away screaming
I love that you say he said "Mum" and then write pinkie thinking mom brillant little thing
Honestly, it doesnt have to all be comedy. Its nice to just have a bit of a written sitdown and r&r.
Oi, you 'ave a loicense fer wroitin' loicense, lad?
She 'as a loicense? Prepostorous! Nopownie 'ere 'ave any of those loicenses! Forgery, I tell ye!
10595011
Also, I'm British and this is pretty much how us boys from Birmingham act and talk.
And it's a good representation of some of us.
And it's funny.
keep writin the story ya little wanka.
10564690
I'm British and that's offensive you little shit.