Terraria: Friendship Is Magic

by Pomp-Neigh

Chapter 106 - Old Habits Die Hard.

-TERRARIA-

The sun continued to beam down upon the world of Terraria as Pinkamena was currently making her way towards a large city in the distance. She then recalls and ponders on Yharim’s words as she says:

“What the buck did he mean by ‘Calamitas is already there and waiting for me.’?” Suddenly, the pony could hear the clopping of whooves and the wheels of a wagon coming up behind her. The sounds suddenly stops, to which the dark pink pony turns her head around and notices two male terrarians who were positioned at the helm of the wagon, which was being pulled by a duo of horses.

“Excuse us, pony. But, are you in fact, well… the real deal?” One of the individuals inquires.

“Want me to take a shit on your wagon to prove how real I am?” Pinkamena responds with irritation as she recognizes this duo.

“Oh, she’s rather rude. Wouldn’t you say, dear brother of mine?”

“Why yes, dear brother of mine. Perhaps she’d show us more respect if she knew who we were?”

“I already know you, idiots. The Flim-Flam brothers. Now beat it, I’m busy right now.” Pinkamena responds as she continues to make her way down the dirt road and onto her main objective: Camelot. The dark pink mare could hear the two brothers dismount from their wagon as they then started to draw near.

“Well then, I think we can just skip the charades. Eh, dear brother of mine?” Flim questions with a sinister smile.

“Why yes, dear brother of mine. I think she’d sell for a handsome amount.” Flam replies as the two brothers conjure forth a series of melee weapons, specifically: Silver Shortswords.

As this is going on, Pinkamena simply stops her movement and flickers her ears about as she continues to face towards Camelot. The dark pink pony was very tempted to kill the two terrarians, who were now drawing ever closer from behind. In fact, she was mere seconds away from conjuring forth her Vampire Knives and butchering the duo right then and there; leaving their mangled remains on the dirt road for someone else to find.

-Of bucking course… I offer to let them go and it turns out they planned to capture me from the very start, just for being a pony. To sell me off like some object, judging by that idiot’s words-

Suddenly, a sinister smile forms onto the dark pink pony’s face as she says internally:

-You dumbasses want a pony? Oh, I’ll give you two a pony. Yharim already treats me like an object and if you two dumbasses think I’ll let you do the same to me, you’re dead wrong. However, I’ll take a page from Yharim and use you two to get me into that city-

The brothers were now mere moments from being able to grab the pony as she mutters one final thing:

“Yes, once your usefulness has expired… I’ll show you two what happened to the Flim-Flam brothers in my universe. In the GrimDark.”

“You’re coming with us, pony.” Flim comments as he points the blade towards Pinkamena, who in turn was still looking away from the duo with a devilish smile.

“She’d undoubtedly sell for so much money, dear brother of mine. We’d probably even get fifty platinum pieces for her. Ponies are incredibly rare nowadays.” Flam responds while imitating his brother’s actions and aiming his own blade towards Pinkamena.

Finally, the dark pink mare turns around and puts on an act so believable that even Princess Celestia herself would be drawn into the absolute cuteness that was radiating from Pinkamena.

“P-please, don’t hurt me. I was o-only being mean to scare you two away. P-please, I’m d-defenceless…” Pinkamena comments with false tears strolling down her face.

“Too bad, pony. You’re nothing but our retirement funds now.” Flam comments.

“Now then, be a good little pink pony and get your flank into the wagon,” Flim orders as he brings the edge of the blade to Pinkamena’s neck. “Move it!”

“Y-yes… please, don’t hurt me.” Pinkamena ‘pleads’.

“Do as we say and the worse that could happen to you is that you end up with a master who’ll turn you into glue. Oops, well, I never said that we’d do anything to ya. Aside from selling your sorry ass, that is,” Flam states as the two brothers forcefully guide the dark pink mare towards the back of the wagon. Flim opens the door for his brother and their ‘prisoner’ which in turn causes Flam to say:

“Get in.”

“O-ok, but p-please, won’t you just let me-”

“I said get in! What are ya, a pony or a donkey? Idiot,” Flam interjects in a mocking tone as he cuts off Pinkamena’s words. He then turns towards his brother and continues: “I’ll keep our little friend here quiet while you drive us to the warehouse. Thanks to our ‘totally legit’ business history, no one should question us.” Flam says as he forces Pinkamena into the cart and follows her inside.

“Sounds good to me dear brother of mine,” Flim replies enthusiastically as he closes the door to the cart behind them and heads back to the helm, yelling out: “Yah!” This causes the two horses to neigh in response as they continue to pull the cart towards Camelot.

---

-TERRARIA, CAMELOT-

After speaking with the guards who were stationed at the gates to the city, Flim was currently beaming a bright smile and waved to bypassers as he guided his wagon through the active capital of Camelot. Children were playing on the stone paved streets while merchants were exclaiming their goods to potential customers.

Various groups and individuals were going about their own business as they wore weapons and armor proudly. This was to be expected as Flim was now passing by various guilds and organizations. Among them was one that was all too familiar: The Order Of The Guide.

Some time passes by as Flim guides the wagon down towards the docks. Thanks to Camelot’s current location, a river system was located just behind the city which in turn gave them access to the sea. This was perfect for trade purposes in addition to various forms of sea travel, for any and all reasons.

The wagon was now drawing near a large warehouse all while Flim greeted local fishermen and momentarily socialized with familiar clients. One in particular even thanked Flim, in a hushed tone, for their recent transaction which involved the accumulation of slaves. Despite Camelot being a city of peace and light, it also possessed its fair share of darkness which lurked within the bowels of the capital and hidden among the populace.

Finally reaching his destination, Flim dismounts the helm of the wagon and runs over to a duo of large metallic doors which in turn acts as the entrance to the large warehouse. He parts the doors wide open and looks around one last time in order to check if the coast was clear. He then practically hops over to the wagon’s helm and beckons the two horses to pull the wagon inside, all while singing a small tune:

“We’re going to be rich,
That pony was a bitch,
But now my brother has her by the neck,
And soon she’ll be the key to our retirement.”

Entering the warehouse, Flim once again dismounts the wagon and goes to close the two large metallic doors, locking them as a result. He then enthusiastically hops over to the back of the wagon and open the door while saying:

“Weeeee’re here! Are you ready… t-to… be,” Flim’s eyes were widened in horror as Pinkamena glares at him from within the wagon. However, it wasn’t just her infuriated expression that shocked him. No, it was the blood covered insides of the wagon along with dismembered remains of what was once his own brother, Flam.

“Wh… how… w-when d-did you-”

“Awww, is poor little Flim worried about what happened to his brother? Well, how about we ask him?” Pinkamena interjects as she cuts off Flim’s words, whose face was still etched entirely of shock and fear. What scares Flim even further and almost causes him to puke in response was what Pinkamena now had in her left hoof: Flam’s dismembered head.

“Hey Flam, tell your brother how you feel right now.” Pinkamena inquires as she then deepens her voice and pretends to be Flam, replying to herself by moving his mouth in the process.

“Don’t you worry about little old me, dear brother of mine. See? I’m doing just fine. I was just having a nice little chat with Pinkamena, but I got… ‘a-head’ of myself.”

“Badum-tish.” Pinkamena comments as she then throws Flam’s head at Flim; hitting the brother in the process as the dismembered head then falls to the ground. Flim was absolutely stunned in fear and with tears starting to roll down his face. One would think that the remaining brother should be running away or even calling for help. However, seeing his brother’s dismembered head; in addition to the gory scene that was inside of the wagon, was enough to shut down any form of competent thought. The terrarian simply faints in response to which Pinkamena smirks and says:

“You and I are going to have a lot of fun, Flim. Now then, I believe that your warehouse could use: A cellar.”

---

“Wha… where am I?” Flim inquires groggily as he slowly starts to come to. “I had a terrible-” Suddenly, his eyes widened when he saw… her.

“Oh! You’re finally awake. You know, I was going to install a cellar for this place but it looks like you two already had one. Good foresight on your part,” Pinkamena responds as she then picks up a knife that was positioned on the table that she was currently sat upon. “And all too convenient for me.”

Flim took a moment to truly take in his surroundings and just as the dark pink pony had mentioned, he was indeed within the warehouse’s cellar. In addition, he was currently restrained against a metallic table which was currently lifted against the wall. This scene was all too familiar to Pinkamena as she comments in a dark tone:

“You know, this isn’t the first time that I’ve seen this very same scenario play out. Having one of my victims restrained against their will, watching them quake in fear and even questioning if this is even real. Let me just say: It’s real, it’s all too real. Isn’t that right, Flam?” Pinkamena inquires as she turns her gaze towards the dismembered head of the terrarian.

“P-please! Let me go! I won’t tell anyone!” Flim pleads with tears going down his face.

“By the Light Goddess, you have no idea how nostalgic this entire situation is. If I had a bit, or in this world’s case, copper, for every time I heard that line, I’d be the richest pony in the multiverse.” Pinkamena then gets off of her seat with her knife still in hand.

As she continued to draw near, Flim was now shaking uncontrollably and even urinated on himself as his gray long pants were suddenly becoming wet in his crotch area. Pinkamena simply chuckles in response before she says:

“I must congratulate you though, because you get to be my first terrarian! No, not the first one to kill, but for something else,” The dark pink pony now stands before Flim as she comments: “Tell me, how do you feel about… cupcakes?”

The terrarian’s eyes were widened even further upon hearing those words, and understanding her meaning, as he then started to scream for dear life. Of course, no one would ever hear him scream at all… the pony made sure of that.

Author's Note:

Character inventory/equipment:

Fluttershy: Statigel Armor(pony, equipped), Overloaded Blaster, Eviscerator, Crimslime Staff, Corroslime Staff, Slime Staff, Finch Staff, Snow Flinx Staff, Hornet Staff, Blood Clot Staff, Deathbringer Pickaxe, Blood Lust Cluster Axe, Healing Potion, Honey Comb(equipped), Brain Of Confusion(equipped), Mana Polarizer(equipped), Honeyed Goggles, Slime Mount, Staff Of Necrosteocytes, Purified Jam.

Rainbow Dash: Necro Armor(pony, equipped), Star Cannon, Minishark, Eviscerator, Aquatic Discharge, Bloody Rupture, Deathbringer Pickaxe, Blood Lust Cluster Axe, Healing Potion, Aero Stone(equipped), Brain Of Confusion(equipped), Bone Glove(equipped), Mana Polarizer(equipped), Victory Shard, Slime Mount.

Zecora: Crimson Armor(zebra, equipped), Dune Hopper, Sausage Maker, Beenade, Tooth Ball, Aorta, Deathbringer Pickaxe, Blood Lust Cluster Axe, Various Potions, Rocket Boots(equipped), Honey Comb(equipped), Sand Cloak(equipped), Brain Of Confusion(equipped), Bloodstained Gloves(equipped), Bone Glove(equipped), Mana Polarizer(equipped), Honeyed Goggles, Skeletron Hand.

Starlight Glimmer: Meteor Armor(pony, equipped), Space Gun, Starfury, Vein Burster, Purple Phaseblade, Deathbringer Pickaxe, Blood Lust Cluster Axe, Mana Potion, Healing Potion, Victory Shard, Rocket Boots(equipped), Aero Stone(equipped), Brain Of Confusion(equipped), Mana Polarizer(equipped), Bone Glove(equipped), Slime Mount, Book Of Skulls, Skeletron Hand.

Rarity: Meteor Armor(pony, equipped), Space Gun, Hornet Staff, Snow Flinx Staff, Ice Mirror, Blood Clot Staff, Deathbringer Pickaxe, Blood Lust Cluster Axe, Mana Potion, Rocket Boots(equipped), Brain Of Confusion(equipped), Mana Polarizer(equipped), Slime Mount, Book Of Skulls, Skeletron Hand, Staff Of Necrosteocytes.

Applejack: Crimson Armor(pony, equipped), Vein Burster, Orange Phaseblade, Deathbringer Pickaxe, Blood Lust Cluster Axe, Rope, Metal Detector, Healing Potion, Rocket Boots(equipped), Honey Comb(equipped), Flurry Boots(equipped), Brain Of Confusion(equipped), Mana Polarizer(equipped), Honeyed Goggles, Slime Mount, Bone Glove, Skeletron Hand.

Twilight Sparkle: Meteorite Armor(pony, equipped), Space Gun, Book Of Skulls, Deathbringer Pickaxe, Blood Lust Cluster Axe, Mana Potion, Ichor, Victory Shards, Aero Stone(equipped), Brain Of Confusion(equipped), Mana Polarizer(equipped), Slime Mount.

Pinkie Pie: Crimson Armor(pony, equipped), Vein Burster, Blue Phaseblade, Bloody Rupture x2, Aorta, Deathbringer Pickaxe, Blood Lust Cluster Axe, Metal Detector, Rocket Boots(equipped), Honey Comb(equipped), Flurry Boots(equipped), Brain Of Confusion(equipped), Mana Polarizer(equipped), Bone Glove(equipped), Honeyed Goggles, Slime Mount, The Blood Butcherer, Skeletron Hand.

Comments

[ArcticAce01]

It’s here!

[ArcticAce01]

Man.. that got so gruesome and dark so fast

[Pomp-Neigh]

10690036
Oh yes...

[-Pinkamena_Pie-]

Heheheheheheh... Oh, I'm going to have some FUN.

[Loganic]

And I thought I was one of the worst people in terraria. They deserved it tho.

[Pomp-Neigh]

10690051
They really did, especially since they implied that Pinkamena wasn't the first "person" they did that to. Or in her case, tried to do it to.

[Jason Monroe]

Nice bit of horror, even if it wasn't in the least bit horrifying to me.

Fun Fact: The lifespan of a kenku ends in their 60s or 70s. Tori is 48.

[Snow Frostfang]

RIP AND TEAR

[Snow Frostfang]

10690137
this will be more awkward for me as i've yet to meet the pony twilight sparkle, huh now that i think about it the whole meeting the pony twi and then later them meeting each other after GoG Twilight is back to normal and good will be much awkward

[Legioner8]

10690139
Imagine meeting them when they face each other.
Snow: Twilight Sparkle! I finally found you!
Both Twi and DoG turn towards Snow: What?

[Legioner8]

You know, I was going to install a cellar for this place

Pinkamena the fastest construction worker in the multiverse.

[Jason Monroe]

I feel like there's a way to make this meme work for this story.

[Snow Frostfang]

10690146
It's was at that moment I knew the world FUCKED UP when naming the DoG

[HB_DS2013]

They deserved it and won’t be missed.

[Snow Frostfang]

Well guess i'll be seeing you guys in Hardmode, heck i wanna have last chapter cameo feeling that hardmode has begun

[Loganic]

10690404
I’m 99 percent sure that either 1 Terraria sparkle won’t be able to cure you considering it’s a giant worm that eats gods, tho our species might be the same. Or 2 She just eats you.

[aRandomBoy]

Rest in not peace Flam.

[Theone23]

10690531
Or pieces.

[Theone23]

10690496
Going off of what was revealed, I think if Snow manages to free "Twilight" then the entity might just heal his parents. I believe Draedon's Log said that it used to be a guardian of life, before Yharim screwed it over.

EDIT:

Ok, just double checked the log in the previous chapter and yes, it was also capable of healing curses and infections.

[Loganic]

10690537
Oh. Well then. Add a 3 thing to the list. Terraria sparkle actually heals Snows parents. And others.

[Snow Frostfang]

10690548
Also won’t you be dead by the time we free “twilight”

[Snow Frostfang]

10690496
Also I don’t need to be cured I accepted being a werebeast a long time ago

[Loganic]

10691237
Hopefully not.

[Jayo Jack]

I think it's safe to say that the genocide version of bonetrousle would fit in for the grim dark part of this chapter. I know it's not related to undertale, but it's one of the creepy music choices I know for now.