• Member Since 17th Feb, 2014
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

MagnetBolt


They/Them, Currently working on: [TOO MANY] projects.

E

Seasaddle is a city where the highest of high tech meets with the lowest of low society. The rain only seems to let up at night, and sunny days are as rare as hen's teeth. It's a city where the heavens weep, the earth rumbles, and the crowds pray for somepony to save them. Only one pony is up to the task, and when she's forced out of retirement, she'll do her best to take up the burden without being broken by it.


National Novel Writing Month 2020 project!

I'll be publishing this as I meet daily goals, so hopefully the story goes somewhere interesting. It's something I've had ideas about for a few years now.

Thank you to all my readers! You're the reason I do this silly stuff!

Chapters (23)
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Comments ( 60 )

Yay! :pinkiehappy: Mare-do-well is back! :twilightsmile:

I mean, this seems like the beginning of a great adventure and all, with a neat core mystery. However, the number of incomplete stories you've put on pause is beginning to worry me. Like, there's Machina Cor Armageddon, Agent of SECT, Second Sunrise, and Terminal Fault from just this past year. I know more than most how fickle one's muse can be, but still.

10512713
Admittedly I've been slacking off. I'm terrible at endings, and for two of those, I've been struggling with the very end. Second Sunrise is still very much being actively worked on, but this is a National Novel Writing Month project, and by tradition it means starting something new.

That said, just for you I'll try and clear out my backlog of unreleased chapters. :twilightsheepish:

10512771
Hey, no worries. You were rather sick, after all.

Interesting take on changeling reformation. No wonder they set up those feeling forums, if all their emotions were suddenly magnified. The two Mare Do Wells serve as exceptions to their respective rules. Meanwhile, where did Philtrum get her suit, I wonder?

“I’m not sick. I feel amazing! And I won’t let you stop me. If you won’t be the hero the city needs, I will!” Philtrum widened her stance, fog pouring out of her armor in a protective shroud.

Oh boy. I had a friend who had manic episodes. The friend didn't hurt anyone, or even come close, but the energy is exactly like this. This passage was a gut punch. Because when I read this, I suddenly, viscerally understood that Philtrum, in her current state of mind, is angry and full of energy and she thinks all her ideas are good ideas. Maybe some of her targets even deserve what she's done. Most don't. I don't even regard any of this as Philtrum's fault, to be honest. It's a tragedy no one wants.

Or even if she goes after some of the right targets, she's a young person trying to throw her life away and it's been a while since she's been in a fit state of mind to make choices. It makes me want to stop her and makes me want to protect her.

I wonder if it might also be worthwhile for them to look into what's keeping the tunnels dry now...

I've been enjoying the story, by the way; thank you for writing, and good luck with National Novel Writing Month!

Small plot hole, why didn't Loopy shift into a foal to make getting through the air vents easier?

10515779
She's not all that good at changing size and mass, which is also why she can't manage huge monsters or rocks. Sticking to around average pony/changeling size is easiest on her. If she'd gotten stuck she would have slimmed up to squeeze through, of course, but it didn't come up.

When she tried to catch herself, something in the suit pushed back. It was like a pony trying to help her steady herself and getting it exactly wrong,

An "Active Assist" system ... great for physical actions and combat if you know what it does, horrible if you don't ....

10515220 That's a good (and maybe important) question ....

Supernova Solutions had their stock drop to almost nothing. She probably lost her entire fortune, and the company will get sold off to somepony else. Maybe somepony with morals.

Unless Piston's assets were either seized or all tied up in the Company, she can just buy all the stock back at its new, low rate and keep right on going, with only the bad PR from the "blatant lies of a disgruntled and mentally unstable former employee" as a consequence. She can probably even use her legal teams and PR department to dump all the guilt for the demo devices on the "violent criminal" Spellchecker. So, no, Piston did get away with it. :twilightangry2:

10516530
Aye. I suspect it may be related to the source of the suit, also currently an unknown...

Oh boy, a lunatic. Ever unpredictable elements, lunatics. I like the bits of character development for Loopy you're beginning to sprinkle in.

Shouldn't you finish your other stories before you start a new one?

10517581
I always do a new thing for national novel writing month. Things will be back to your regularly scheduled program before November 30th! :twilightsheepish:

And another... episode? That seems to be the structure. In any case, another one done. I continue to enjoy the story; thanks for writing. :)

I do wonder if we'll see Gwen again...

Ri2

I immediately love Gwen and ship her and Loopy.

Ri2

Wait...was Gwen a synth?

Bon Bon was right, sugary drinks will kill you. They're just usually not so active about it.

10520142
Pretty sure she was just faking it as a ploy.

Interesting! Quite a few new questions raised! :D

Nice. I probably would have gone with Mentos, but this works too.

“Besides, a mare like that is better on the rocks.”

Boooooooo

Ri2

Yakyakistan? Brilliant! The yaks can smash her forever!

Yeah, I was already suspecting that the computer's "predictions" were more "here's the disaster we plan to cause next"... I suppose there could still be a twist there, but it doesn't look good for those being genuine prophecies.

Did... did Doctor Auspex create sentient AI?

This story is one of the few that makes me wish I could give more than a single thumbs up!

The bomb he’s got around his chest just doesn’t go with the tie he’s wearing.

:rainbowlaugh: Gwen seems to be channeling Rarity here :raritywink:

10520142 Considering her reaction to Brass's "Synth Revealer", there's definitely something unusual about her ...

Ri2

So, do they confiscate Horoscope and install it in the Park Row Provisional SMILE Office to help them fight crime?

"Lyra sighed and stepped back, then spotted the paper Auspex had dropped, the last prediction the machine had made. She read it and started laughing."
Huh. I thought Auspex burned it?

PREDICTION: MARE DO WELL SHUTS DOWN HOROSCOPE SCAM, SAVE COMPUTER FROM BEING USED TO HURT PONIES

:rainbowderp: :yay:

10524997 Why, yes, yes, I believe she did :pinkiehappy:

Interesting, both backstory and story-story. I wonder just what's going on here? And if that cream has aught to do with it...

And as usual, some questions answered, some more raised, and a fun time (though not for the villains :D) in the process. :)
I think you're pulling off the serial/series aspect well, and thanks for writing!

Ri2

Well, damn.

What will happen to the other kids?

This story needs a lot more thumbs up. Like, all of the thumbs.

Steel Braver's Mark isn't described, but I think surely it must be the PrinTecca logo.

Ri2

So, does this mean Loopy has a sidekick?

So ... Black trashed PrinTecca's synth labs to make sure his synths went to market first, he's behind the School, and I'm betting that he's using the etherite in his synths ...

Is anyone else thinking Bubblegum Crisis/AD Police Files?

A victim of the Canterlot invasion, maybe?

They tricked me, and I was taken away to the hive. They captured me and drained me dry. ... They dragged me out of a pod, on legs I hadn’t used for months, and threw me into the badlands. I was supposed to die.

So, not the Canterlot Invasion, but still very traumatic and plenty of reason to form a hatred of Changelings ….

a giant spider wrapping them in a web, which was particularly distressing when there were, in fact, spiders large enough to do that

:rainbowderp: and now I'm creeped out ....

Okay, how did Loopy know to turn into Chrysalis?:rainbowhuh: ... Is Loopy really Chrysalis in disguise?:pinkiegasp:

"grabbing a trailing note from the net"
...Was that meant to be "rope"?

"Thorax picked up both Whisper and Thorax with his magic"
"Thorax picked up both Whisper and Loopy with his magic"?


10535947
"Okay, how did Loopy know to turn into Chrysalis?:rainbowhuh: ... Is Loopy really Chrysalis in disguise?:pinkiegasp:"
I'm guessing it was an educated guess, based on Pest Control's fear response to the appearance of unreformed changelings. What better would exemplify and intensify that than Chrysalis?
As for Loopy really being Chrysalis in disguise, I did also briefly wonder that, but I don't think so, if we assume that details about the transformation in the narration are reliable.

10535947

Loopy could sense his fear of changelings, especially original flavor. What could possibly scare him more than seeing the Arch-Changeling, the Queen of the Hive, right in front of him?

Of course, since she's terrible at shapeshifting outside her comfort zone of average pony size and shape, it was extremely draining.

Man, this Equestria is pretty darn advanced. I wonder how much of the initial research was Twilight's? Or at least funded by her.

Well, that answers the question of whether Gwen'd be showing up again. :D

Ri2

Is the professor's first name Uncanny?

This chapter was great. The only way I could see it being improved is if you had Loopy turn into a skeleton to threaten Crimson. :trollestia:

Somehow every chapter is better than the last. Bravo!

It's (probably intentionally) not clear in the story yet, but it seems that Gwen and Jasmine are more borg than synths, as they seem to have emotions where PrinTecca's synth does not. Otherwise surely Loopy would have identified them as synths right away.

Hah! Nice. :)

(Though I do wonder why Professor Valley couldn't have just built a new charging platform...)


10538587
Why a skeleton, particularly?

10539694

“Let the girl go, or you’re going to have a bad time,” Mare Do Well said.

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