• Published 18th Oct 2020
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Changing Expectations - KKSlider



What does it mean to be a Changeling? To the former human Prince Phasma, that means doing what you can to survive and thrive in an utterly alien world.

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8- Heka

Today is the worst day of my new life.

Chrysalis is cutting me off. No more pure love. No more sweet, sweet drugs. Instead, I am being fed a gel that has a bit of love mixed in. I checked and no, it was not the changeling-vomit-concrete.

I spent a month in a chrysalis and came out a nymph. Waking up with actual legs is nice and all but it all came at a cost I wasn’t willing to pay. I would have stayed a caterpillar if it meant avoiding this.

Apparently the pure love was a special diet to speed along my growth as a larva. Since I’m no longer bird-food, I am being moved onto a diet that’s normal for the changelings of the hive. Well, every changeling except Chrysalis. She still gets pure love for herself.

Chrysalis also says that since I was on a diet of pure love, my nymph stage will also go by quicker than normal. Fine by me, the sooner I can stop being a child, the sooner I can start living a new life rather than just reacting to new events around me. I feel helpless and vulnerable. I want to do things, not go to school again.

Thankfully the new stuff that I’m being fed isn’t that bad. Instead of reaching a state of euphoria and inner peace, it just tastes good. Quite the step down, but considering the hive was in a state of starvation, rations could be far worse. I can’t even imagine what peasants in medieval human history ate during famines.

So my dealer is holding out on me, but it’s not the end of the world.

Queen Chrysalis is still tutoring me herself for the most part, keeping me away from other nymphs. However, today’s lessons, the first that I had while a nymph, brought with them an interesting surprise.

“Prince Phasma. Urgent matters require my attention but I have acquired a tutor for you. Do not worry, your studies will not be put on hold,” Queen Chrysalis said and I noted her careful phrasing.

“I thought you said you were going to teach me everything?”

“Yes yes, I will. This tutor is to help you practice. You do not need my presence here for that.”

I blinked. “Practice. As in, practice magic?”

That certainly puts a spin on things. I was still bummed out that I am no longer being fed love but it seems Chrysalis is ending off on good news to try to endear herself to me further. I liked her better when she was giving me free drugs.

“Yes, my little prince. It is too early for you to learn flying– your wings must harden– but it is time you put your lessons to use. I am certain you will excel at casting just as you excelled at thaumic theory. Sergeant Katydid, you may enter now.”

I glanced at my back as the door opened; my transparent wings lay under elytra that blended in with the rest of my back. I had shades of orange filling out my back, in contrast to bug-mom’s green and the rest of the changelings’ blue.

I suppose I looked good– and orange is my favorite color– but I can’t help but picture myself as a horse stuffed into a traffic cone.

A changeling enters her study as commanded and bowed before the queen. As all changelings looked similar, I had trouble telling him apart from the rest physically. The only things identifying him from the other changelings seemed to be the nicks and scratches on his armor.

Thankfully there was a Weave signature that was unique to each changeling. It would be hard to tell each other apart at a glance otherwise. As it is, you just know each other’s names. Introductions are the exchanging of information through the Weave, like if you were to trade driver’s licenses when you shake hooves.

‘Hands! Shake hands!’

Officer Katydid brings me out of my mental tirade, “My Queen, I am honored to be chosen for this duty.”

Chrysalis nods, “You may rise, Officer Katydid.” When the officer rose, Chrysalis stared him in the eyes, “Prince Phasmatodea will become an unrivaled spellcaster under your instruction.”

That wasn’t a question or a hopeful remark, it was an order. Without another word, she left the room and closed the door behind her. The officer continued to stare at the spot she occupied.

“No pressure,” I said with a fanged smile. He turned to glance down at me.

“I will not fail, My Prince!” I don’t think it was me he was trying to reassure. “We will begin with levitation, as all nymphs first learn.”

“Daring today, aren’t we?”


While I did memorize the thaumic formula for casting spells, casting them is a horse of a different color. I would make a pony joke there but today’s lessons have left me dead on my hooves with no energy left for puns.

As it turns out, learning spells and casting spells are two completely different things. One requires thinking and memorizing, and the other requires thinking of your memorized material while commanding reality to bend to your whims. I am simplifying things a bit here.

Point is, casting magic is taking all the effort and skill that went into learning thaumic theory and spell crafting in addition to using a muscle that quite literally does not exist in the physical realm. We changelings, as well as any magic capable species, use our horns to channel magic from our souls. The horn is the conduit, while it’s our mana reserves doing the real work.

And since pain is the body’s signal that something is going wrong, our bodies tell us that we fucked up casting by making our horns hurt like hell, since they are the only physical part of our body used in casting.

Not that I miscasted or anything. No, instead I felt magic fatigue. Which is like the pain of miscasting, only it stings instead of burns.

The first spell all changelings and magic users in general learn is levitation. Simply put, you channel magic with the intent of moving things around.

For most nymphs, foals, fawns, what-have-you, that’s quite the mental conundrum. For someone who had hands, imagining picking things up from far away was a really great point to start off of. However, humans do not have magic. Meaning, my magic reserves, while abysmal for a changeling adult drone and ridiculously high for a newly-born changeling nymph, were spent up within an hour.

All I had to show for my efforts were some paperweights that were moved from one side of the floor to the other. Exercising magic was like exercising any other muscle group; it hurt, it took effort, and I was a complaining mess by the end.

‘Wizards are supposed to be the opposite of gym rats! This is ridiculous, I want a refund on my reincarnation!’

I had retired to my room, which was down the hall, near the exit to the throne room. It currently consisted of an actual mattress which had been retrieved in the month I was taking an extended nap, a changeling-concrete frame for it, and a stone chest. It doesn’t take three guesses to find out which two materials the hive had in abundance.

No sheets, blankets, or pillows, but with hard chitin they were more of a luxury than a need.

I was utterly exhausted, probably in the early stages of withdrawal, and completely out of my element as the prince of an insectoid, equine kingdom. My mother, the individual who’s supposed to be my role model and primary caregiver, seemed like the kind of person who kicks puppies for a laugh.

A smile slowly crept onto my face.

‘I’m an actual wizard! I can make this work!’

That night I dreamt of a blood-red moon above an empty sea, whispering the Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War tutorial into my ear. Yea, I’m definitely going through withdrawal.

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