- Member Since 5th Sep, 2014
- offline last seen Sep 25th, 2022
RoyalBardofCanterlot
Celestia and Luna's royal bard. Nature is my God, Art is my religion, Love is the Law. Concordia Invictus
RoyalBardofCanterlot
Joined 5th Sep, 2014 ·
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Might be people sick and tired of this never existed in any way, shape, or form, ship (even calling them friends is stretching it). Or it might be that you turned into a wimp and disabled the ratings, before turning them back on, that's leading to the downvotes.
Just my two cents though.
10470610
I'd prefer for the comments section to be reserved for comments about the story. Thank you.
I really liked that cute little fluttermac fic... I will never leave that ship :D
10470691
Thanks.
A good little story, the custom kind of reminds me of that old Japanese trope of the husband coming home and the wife asking him if he wanted food, a bath, or her.
10470759
Never heard that one. Glad you liked it. But I do see Fluttershy as the submissive wife type. Not out of fear, but out of love.
So I checked this out to see why it was so downvoted. I'm guessing it has a lot to do with the ship, TBH. FlutterMac was fairly popular before SugarMac became canon. Since then, it (and many other Mac ships) are basically viewed the same way as Cadence x [someone other than Shining] or Shining x [someone other than Cadence]. Unless it's HiE porn or something, it's not really favored.
Personally, I'm fine with most ships as long as the writing is good. FlutterMac isn't my favorite (I'll take SugarMac or MacDash over it), but it's not horrible.
If any of the downvotes came from reading the story, they might be from how... Well, tame it is. The Earth pony tradition being oral sex kind of threw me for a loop. I had to reread to make sure I wasn't missing something. I was expecting something more kinky or unusual than a pretty common sex act. I know that it's [current year] and humans are not magical fictional ponies, but when magical fictional ponies are written by humans and given the personality/mannerisms/traditions of humans... it seems odd for something as mundane as oral sex to be treated like a secret shame.
Now, the clop itself was okay. Could have used more detail, both in terms of action and the emotions/sensations it elicited from the characters. It wasn't downvote worthy in and of itself though, IMO.
Finally, I saw from the thread that you had ratings disabled for a bit. Err, don't do that. I really don't understand the point of adding that site feature, nor the one that can disable comments. People often downvote punitively if the author does something they don't like. It's not right, but it's happened since I've been on this site. (This is not my first account.) So try not to take all of the downvotes personally.
Overall, a decent read. Upvote, but no favorite.
10470777
I was actually worried that, since the idea is for the wife to give the husband oral when he gets home and then he reciprocate it would seem coercive. That's why I threw in a particular line. Anyway, thank you for sharing your thoughts. Also, gotten an improved rating when I added the AU tag.
10470786
Well, it's not more coercive than Fluttershy wanting to be a "good wife" anyway. I guess if Earth ponies can be more analogous to humans since they lack horns or wings, that attitude could be considered coercive in a certain light... but it's not uncommon at all. Even in [current year] people still have wedding-night jitters, whether they've done it a thousand times before or never. That transition from girl/boyfriend into spouse can be a lot sometimes.
And adding the AU tag was probably a good call.
I liked this a little, though I felt Big Mac speaking was a little out of character, at least have him say his simple phrases now and then.
10471836
What parts did you like?
10471838
Oh just the romance in general. Never thought of Fluttermac or Macshy, whatever their ship name is. They hardly interact as far as I know. But I like this story.
10471845
I'm glad you liked it. Since I wanted the story to be more than sex, I did try to do a bit of a conflict with both being nervous about expressing their needs. Do you feel I captured that well?
I am always happy to see monogamous erotica. I don't fav much. I fav-ed this.
10471925
Glad it made ya happy. It's what I aim for.
I always do enjoy a good FlutterMac story. It felt like really pleasant and wholesome experience for the two of them. In retrospect, they should have just told each other and got into this earlier. Oh well. They are both pretty shy. Well, they'll certainly be having many more fun times ahead now. I think their amorous desires for each other were good in and of themselves, but it felt like it built up just a little too quickly. If the foreplay was a bit more prolonged, the payoff might have been even more satisfying. That's not really enough to sour the experience, though. This was very good mix of cute and erotic, which is a type of story I think you do really well.
10472112
Thank you. In retrospect, it could have been longer, but I'm glad you enjoyed it.
This is some cloptastic clop. ʕ•ٹ•ʔ
P.S. You mention squirrels fighting over acorns, then a few paragraphs later they become chipmunks. :)
It's not bad. Big Mac's speech is a little strange in this one. Usually he isn't that wordy. The fellatio part needs a little more detailed and clear description. Fluttershy's movements are a little confusing at times. Sometimes she was at his "fruits" and in the next line she was swallowing him down. There need to be something connecting that gap. The cunnilingus part was handled much better. Overall I'd say it's a nice, sweet little clop, maybe a bit plain, but not bad.
10470786
I don't feel the coerciveness in this one (and believe me, I wish there was, since my fetish is coercion/non-con). But at any rate, there are many ways you can address that. Either make clear of Fluttershy's desire and craving when she perform the act, or make Big Mac a little reluctant/surprised. That would make it clear who was in charge.
On the other hand, if you want to address the coercive factor in the tradition itself, simply add some clarification from Pinkie Pie that this tradition originated from the mares themselves (i.e. an Earth Pony mare marrying a husband of different race would still perform this tradition). That would make the mares do it on their own will, not coerced by their husbands.
10472941
Thanks for the review. Are there any scenes I can expand or add more details?
10473342
Well, I would say if you want to add anything, add more details in the fellatio part (when Fluttershy gave Bic Mac the oral). Make it more clear the transition between when she was playing outside and when she took him in her mouth, because that's the most confusing part. For example, this part:
Between the first and second sentences there is not enough details to make clear that she was changing from licking outside to taking him inside. You should add some more descriptions like this:
10474587
If it's only that paragraph, I added a connecting line.
Oh my goodness I love it! Beautiful wholesome FlutterMac love making. This is just perfect.
10480826
*Blushes.* Thank you.
10480864
You're welcome. I'm a huge Fluttermac Fan, been one from the very beginning so seeing one so sweet and wholesome, also giving some extra lore to Earth Pony marriages, its just so cool. I loved!
So cute! I wish more sex stories were like this. Most are about getting an erotic response from the reader, not about showing the sweetness and love.
11272762
Thanks, glad you enjoyed it.