Mexicano (ajua) y un gran fanático de MLP
Comet Dust is an orphan rejected by his companions and most of the ponies just because his appearance. Without friends and only one pony who really cares him, he decided to spend his time alone, far away from other ponies. What happen when someday, a pony decided to adopt him. How will he adjust to his new life? Will he understand the importance of friendship? What adventures waits for him in his new home in Ponyville?
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Good beginning can't wait for the next chapter
Good chapter can't wait for the next chapter
For being so smart, Twilight is so ignorant...I mean come on, she knew he had a bad history with other kids, his first day of school he comes home shy and bruised and doesn't wanna talk about it/deflects. It pretty much screams bullies.
Are you still working on this story, Itztli FP?
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Yes, I'm still working on it. I just uploaded a new chapter. I hope you like it.
Sorry I did´t answered sooner, I've been a little busy, but I'm actually working on the next chapter.
How long will it be before Comet starts calling Twilight ‘mom’?
I deleted my previous comment because I thought I was wrong, but I wasn't. You really need a editor,
There are a LOT of spelling mistakes and other errors I can't think remember the name of
Congratulations, you are the first person to make me want to kill a pony, not even Diamond Tiara or Spoiled Milk/Rich could do that.
Another great adoption story
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A few. It'll be gradually.
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Yeah, I know. Actually, English it is not my native language, it is Spanish, the original language the fanfic is wrote. I made the traslating myself, and I know it is not the best, I still have a lot to learn.
I hope my errors didn't make it too confusing. I'll do my best to improve my English.
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I´m not very sure if that´s a good or a bad thing, but thank you. It means that I´m doing something right.
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Thank you. I'm glad you liked my work.
Could carry
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That was a missclick, I have "could carry" on the paper. :v
10587405
Okay
I honestly hope his old parents (if you can even call them that) don’t find out about him. Especially with him being Twilights kid.
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I haven´t decided that yet, but I've been thinking about it. We are going to have to find it out in the sext chapters.
Thanks for comment.
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NP.
Oh no. The train has stopped. Also nice to see him talk to Cary and the violin sounds nice.
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I'm glad you liked it. Thaks for the comment and the suport
Who do you think Comet will have a crush on?
When is Comet gonna grow a pair and show rumble and his gang why he is Twilight Sparkles son
You seriously need a editor
These are small things that break the flow for me, I'm not qualified for the editor role, at least not yet
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I already thought about that, but if I tell you I would made a spoiler
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Sorry, I made my best to check my grammar, but I sill missing some things. I know I need an editor, the problem is I don't know anyone who can made that job.
Great story.
Not too far away from him, a "fully" was really happy to see him again.
Filly
Nice. Can’t wait to see what he does.
nice to see this back.
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Thanks.
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Sorry for the delay, I've been a little busy lately
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its all good. life happens right.
ooooooh boy. things are gonna get dicey.
Welp, now Twilight is gonna think she failed as a mother so hard when she finds out about this.
This should sum up what I'm thinking.
He might get a little power hungry unless he knows how to control himself
Keep up the good work
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Well, she did. She saw his mood and personality shift after he started school. Yet she never had the gumption to investigate his school, talk to the teachers, or even bother to look into it at all.
And this went on for months, and a good parent who loves and knows their kids would see that something is wrong and narrow it down to the fact that they dread going to school and start looking into why there. Twilight did none of that.
Chapter 3. Mane problems.
After spend the resto of the morning buying at Ponyville’s Market,with a hidden Comet every time they got close to a stand, although, not as nervous as before, they made a little stop at Sugarcube Corner to rest a little bit, eat something and, perhaps, dink a milkshake.
Twilight was amazed with Comet’s magic ability. Although his short age, he could easily carry several of the bags and boxes they carried with theirselves, some quite heavy, just with the force of his horn. Remembering Cary told her that Comet had learned by himself.
extra o, what you have writin is a bit jarring and i think would flow better writtin as (with comet hiding every time they got close to a stand),you misspelled (drink),Did you mean young age? What are u saying??
sorry if this came of as bossy i dont normally do grammer correction comments so i might be coming of as bossy
Feel like Twilight gives into easily... The kid is 6 years old ..... And he is turning into a super villain....
But good Story, but hope it's gonna turned out for the better, before he becomes a villain
Awesome story and I like how you add it that affection of love he was looking for
Awesome work here I can't wait to see what you do next
Keep up the good work I like this and I think your character is great I hope he stops him self soon before he can't stop him self
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It´s not problem, I know my English is not the best. Spanish is actually my native language and there are some phrases that maybe doesn´t exist in English, like Young age, is a literal traduccion of "joven edad" "corta edad" o "temprana edad". I´ll thank you if you help me with my grammar
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Thaks a lot. I've been very busy lately, but I hope I could finish the next chapter soon.
I like Comet like this. He's a fighter.
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Yeah, he´s a fighter, but sometimes is good to have some backing