• Published 7th Oct 2012
  • 2,337 Views, 204 Comments

The true Psychopath: Chaos vs Illogic - The Psychopath



Some things were just never made to meet eachother...

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The groups of an enigma

Celestia and Luna had been preparing their soldiers for an eventual battle, with the heavily armored guards as a frontline wall. Twilight and her friends were preparing on their end, escorting everypony safely away from Ponyville. Pandora and Farseer, well, let's just say that they have found some very powerful unicorns and alchemists...and they were less than obediant, considering what looked like a simple mare with no wizard robes or anything flashy and a blind stallion to be poor excuses for mages.

"Wot's this here, eh?" a red stallion with a mint green mane with diagonal blue streaks going through them asked."You think that you can be our mastahs? Pscheh! Like if. I'm pretty sure I'm more qualified than you." he turned his back and smirked.

His voice echoed well within the nearly completed tower. The portal was complete, the barrier almost complete. All that was needed to complete the protection was to place the enchanted crystal at the top of the tower, which was still in construction. This enormous building was extremely wide, and it narrowed the higher one got, finally ending in just a few extensions. It looked more like a castle than a tower. Right now, the workers were on temporary leave to allow the new mages to prepare for what was going to happen. Pandora formed an evil grin on her face as she figured out what this cretin was saying.

"Are you challenging me for control over this tower?"

"Ya. I think we don't need ta see who wins. Awh'll be takin' the ke-"

The stallion dodged out of the way, but barely, as a portion of the fire cylinder thrown at him singed his mane.

"What in bloody hell was that?"

"Syber. You are well known for your fire magic. How couldn't you guess when I was going to cast a fire serpent?"

"Fire Serpent?!" everypony but Farseer yelled.

"Are you crazy? Fire serpents aren't that 'uge!" Syber shouted in anger.

"Nor can you control them?" Pandora flicked her mane into the air as she showed a maniacal expression.

Right behind the red stallion stood a serpent made of fire. It was flickering like a dying light and staring down the target.

"I won't be made a mockery of like this!"

Syber cast his own spell, another fire serpent, but it was only absorbed into the more powerful. He began to panic, his breathing becoming irregular gasps, and his horn glowing brightly.

"How about I smother you in a torrent of flame? Nopony has survived my fire tomb." he grinned, and from his coat came many walls of fire that drowned all the oxygen around the headmaster. The stallion walked to the closing wall and chuckled."Ha! See? Twas nothing." Syber's overconfidence soon found him flying away into a wall opposite of Pandora.

"Ice?" one of the mages wondered.

"Of course. A true mage can manipulate everything and anything to look like what they want. It is simply a rearrangement of the molecules."

"But I was taught that an object can change, but its true identity cannot."

"Foalery! With sufficient knowledge in chemistry and organic biology, nothing is impossible for a mage! THIS is why I've recruited you all. You shall be the first in a new line of powerful wizards, just like Starswirl and O'Connor."

Farseer facehoofed as he realized what she was doing. He decided it would be best if he intervened before she did something stupid.

"I'll-"Pandora's loud voice was cut off by a large foreleg placed in front of her mouth.

"That's enough, Pandora. You're getting overexcited again." he said in a calm tone.

"Oh. Eheh. Sorry." Farseer rubbed the back of her head in shame.

"Oooo! And who is THIS bulky stallion?" a blue mare white a white mane and tail wondered as she began to get uncomfortably close to Farseer.

"Farseer."

"I thought that wizards were old and wrinkly. You look. Eheheh..."

"Enough of your chantings. We have work to do."

"Yes. We will be havin strick training lessons from dawn 'til dusk. It is to get you all in tip top shape. Let's go to the lower floors for our first spell training session."

Everypony was overjoyed by this and followed their headmistress down the black, marble stairs. Well, almost all. Farseer was about to follow the group when he remembered something very important: Syber. He was still planted firmly in the wall, and he was covered in half-melting ice. The large stallion rolled his eyes and walked towards the brick-pony.

"C'mon, time to get you out of there."


"Whoo! I can't wait to see what is going to happen. I may not have done much, physically, but it's still thanks to me that they're all going to converge into this spot. I SO do love it when a plan comes together."

Discord was lying down on a fluffy pink cloud, eager to see what was about to unfold. He currently had a bag of popcorn next to him and was slowly rotating around Ponyville, already able to see Quick Draw, Black Cloud, and Crimson Gaze looking at Ponyville from afar as well. They were up to something, and even Discord didn't like it. For some reason, even he couldn't find the headquarters to the Couvent du Crépuscule. It bothered him quite alot. However, he was going to see what exactly these two worlds were capable of as they slowly began to reach Ponyville, each on their respective sides.

"Has it been thirteen days already? How time flies when you watch mages train and ruin their fun." he chuckled as he threw a clock into the air and watched it fly away.

Something strange happened to the alarm clock, though, and the glass broke while said mechanical object began to twist and bend as it turned purple.

"Hmmmm. Is that what Sociopath has been hunting? Interesting."

"H-Hey! I found you!"

"Oh, hello Rainbow Dash."

The pegasus tried to attack Discord but found herself stopped by a strangely solid cloud.

"Grrr. Lemme out!" she screamed as she now found herself entangled in the cotton ball.

"Why? Don't you want to see what happens?"

"Yeah! I'm here to stop it."

"You won't be able to. Look, I'm doing you and your friends a favor, because I like you."

"You what?"

"You managed to trick even me, and as a god of chaos, I approve that, although you could've just taken away my powers or turned me into a pony. Staying stuck in stone for all eternity is quite annoying and boring as well as irritating. Imagine not being able to move at all! You wouldn't be able to fly everywhere like you wanted to."

"That's true, but you're still evil! You made me turn on my friends."

"Oh come now. Did I make you hurt them?"

Rainbow Dash looked upwards as she started to think.

"No need to do such a thing. It'll overheat your brain, you already have smoke coming out of your ears."

"What? Ah!"

The colorful mare began to wriggle around uselessly as she tried to put out the fires in her airs. Discord was simply laughing at her while rocking back and forth on his back.

"This isn't funny!"

"Yes it is."

"What is it with you anyways? What do you like about torturing us?"

"I'm not 'torturing you'." Discord used a mocking tone as he bent his fingers."I'm having fun at your expense."

"That's...uhhh..."

Discord facepalmed.

"You really don't have any ounce of a brain in there, do you?"

"Yeah I do! Twilight wanted us to ask you what you saw in Psycho that intrigued you so, whatever that means."

"She's asking me why I'm interested in your colorful friend. I like him because he thinks that chaos and Illogic are two different things. They are one and the sa-"

*smack*

Discord received a flyer in his face that continued to flutter in the wind. Rainbow Dash tried to contain a chortle as she watched Discord remain awkwardly in his position of speech. After regaining his composture, the draconequus took the paper off his face and looked at the flyer. It was Psycho sticking his tongue out at him with huge words printed at the top of the page reading: "No they isn't not!"

"Wow. He used a triple negative. That makes no sense as much as it makes sense." Discord looked irritated for a long moment as he stared into nothing, then he rolled up the paper into a ball and tossed it."I hate math."

"Tell me about it."

"Ah? It's starting."

"What?"

"Why not have a closer look?"

As Discord leaned over the cloud's edge, Rainbow's cottony prison moved carefully forward as to avoid being noticed. There were two sides waiting down there. One side was acting weird on the roofs while the others seemed to have left ravaged lands behind them. While the weird ones were disorganized, the scary ones seemed fairly organized and quite capable of winning a fight.


Psycho was hopping with excitement on Sugar Cube Corner's rooftop with Illus Ion preparing her dice right next to him.

"Hey, Dealer. I bet that we'll beat them in under seven hours." she said with a wide grin.

"Now, see. Now that's, see, just a WIIIIIIIIIIIIDE challenge. Why not, see, narrow down the stakes a bit, see?" Psycho spoke like he had something in his mouth while he wore thick glasses and had a thick unibrow.

"Fiiine. Three hours."

"That's more like it!"

"ENOUGH STALLING!" Mr. Cracker shouted."Let's end this with broken bones and torn spines!"

"What a mean spider." a yellowy green stallion whispered in Cracker's ear.

Mr. Cracker jumped away in surprise. This stallion had deep blue eyes filled with joy and curiousity, along with a brown mane and tail. Cracker's mind began to fade, but the yellowish stallion jumped away as a huge monster slammed its fists at his exact spot.

"Thank you, Mind Breaker."

The black stallion known by this name simply walked forward with a fanged smile in his mouth. Dysfunctional Calamity simply walked up next to breaker with a darker look to his face.

"It wasn't for you. It's just that..."

"We like to be the only ones to break others' minds."

Psycho suddenly began to shout as he wore a kilt with blue and white facepaint while riding what looked like a chocolate duck:

"They meh tek our cabbage, but they'll neverrrrrrr take our fun!"

"Yeahhhhhh!" everypony from the Illogic shouted.

"BURN THEM!" Pyre shouted as she began to burn with fire.

Then the fight started. Everypony jumped from the rooftops and divebombed onto the enemy, some slamming into the ground with beanbags or simply with massive weights, while some found themselves knocked away with diverse weapons, flying in the air like an unladen swallow. And while said fights began, another portal leading from the World of Illogic appeared right atop the townhall. Out came two ponies. One had a gray body with a black mane and tail and wore a tuxedo. His legs looked like musical notes. The other one was green with a roughled mane and tail with red and yellow streaks. This one wore weird "shaded" glasses blocking any outside view of his eyes with bars, and was bopping his head and smiling as if he was hearing music.

"Well, I guess we're slightly late." the green one laughed.

"This isn't funy Tune Adjuster. We ruined a perfectly good entrance."

"Yeah. Sure. String Weaver, what say you and I do MY type of music this time."

"What? No! I'm made for serene music to the ears."

"We did your symphony last time. It's my turn now." the green one stomped the roof of the building and enormous stereos came out, accompanied by an electric guitar and a drum set.

"...Fine. You are my brother, and we're both fair, so, might as well. Let's just get this over with."

String Weaver walked towards his seat and picked up the drum sticks, his face full of 'compassion' for this style of music making. Tune Adjuster simply lift his right foreleg and showed that he had a mechanical hand sticking up with the pinkie finger and index finger sticking out.

"BLOOD SHOT!" he shouted at the top of his lungs before starting to strum the strings and letting his stereos shout their tune.

Meanwhile, on the battlefield, Ferro was finding himself surrounded by several ponies of the Illogic several times over. Even when he would headbang them to get thm on his side, albeit temporarily, it would simply fling them into walls or just skid them across the ground. If it was just for that, then he found more fun in grabbing them all and smashing into the ground, as he did with a mare who started to dig through his armor wth some spoons. He smashed her between his hands and threw the remains into a line of Illogic ponies. Satisfied with his doings, he chuckled and wiped his hands, just to be rammed into by a decidedly larger being. Pushing himself back up, Ferro saw what looked like a steel giant with a serious face. If put in comparison, it was much bulkier and seemed to have several plated portions covering its body. It had a shark mouth made for tricking others into thinking that a shark had bitten into whatever it bit.

"Huh? You look more like you'd belong with Insanity."

"..." it just continued to smile.

"Have it your way." Ferro cracked his knuckles as electricity began to surge through them and attacked.

The iron golem's boxing was very skilled, and each strike threw a thunderclap into the air as well as a blinding spark. The opposing creature just kept getting punched back and forth until it caught Ferro's arm and looked back towards him.

"SHHHHHOCK! UHUHAHAHA!" he yelled as thunder surged back through him and into Ferro.

"What? You'll pay for that!"

"Not likely, rusted bolt."

The two's fist collided, provided a small shockwave breaking the glass nearby.

Dysfunctional Calamity and Roleplay had locked "horns" together and were pushing eachother, trying to break the other's mind.

"I'll win this, stupid snake."

"Idiotic foal. I'll tear your soul into a thousand pieces."

Truly a battle of epic proportions with drama and action. Meanwhile, Solo and Pyre were fighting eachother with as much strength as they could muster. Solo constantly used her loud voice to push away the flames that the orange mare would create, but said mare's blazing eyes were certain of victory, especially as Solo was starting to get tired.

"What's the matter? Getting tired? Awwww. Too bad, because I don't have to move and I can still create fire."

"*huff* Just letting you*huff* relax."

"Of course you are." Pyre gave a "of course" face. "Now why not just burn away like a good blade of grass?"

"Oh. We can't have that." Discord thought to himself.

The thin needle of fire directed for Solo's heart became a cocoon that immediately let free a butterfly. Both were stumped.

"Huh? Well, that won't happen again."

"Raaaaah!"

"Ommpf!"

Neon Slash had dived in and tossed Pyre into a pile of hay farther away.

"Ha! Non can defeat me." he said proudly as he sterned in the air.

"Yeah, yeah. Thanks. There are more things we have to--" Solo was interrupted by Neon getting his leg grabbed by Mr. Cracker and being smashed into the ground with a loud breaking noise.

"Oh no!"

On the other side of Ponyville, where buildings were literally crumbling as the foundations of reality began to tear, Illus Ion and Blade Runner were busy having quite alot of fun. Both were chopping down the less notable members of Insanity.

"I bet you five bits I can cut them all ten of these guys down in thirty seconds." Blade Runner smiled as she stared at the members of Insanity looking frustrated and showing signs of hesitation.

"Go for it."

"Yah!"

In a flash, Blade Runner was back in front of Illus Ion with a smirk as the ten ponies just fell to the ground, unaware of what just happened. Illus tossed five bits to her bald friend and smiled.

"Well, I bet I can get that pegasus up there to fall down on that barrel on the house's balcony there, then to fall and crush those two unicorns right below it."

"What's yer wager?"

"My bits back."

"Ugh. Fine. Go ahead." the pony simply tossed the bits on the floor and rolled her eyes.

Illus picked up a rock and began to aim at the pegasus who was throwing explosives balls everywhere. With her tongue stuck out, she threw her projectile, landing a hit right on the wing, and causing the stallion to fall down and smash into the balcony, breaking it, and tossing the barrely own on the unsuspecting unicorns. The betting pony looked at Blade with a huge smile as she took her bits back, and said bald pony simply crossed her forelegs and pouted her lips.


The fight dragged on and on, much longer than the three hours first thought by Psycho. However, both he and Sociopath were nowhere in sight, and three other ponies were missing as well. The fights dragged on even more until Screwball and Psycho jumped out of chimney and yelled "Ta-da!" at everypony around. The beings of Insanity tried to attack Psycho, but found themselves running around in circles inside of a glass ball while the colorful stallion just stared at their now tiny bodies.
The Psychopath put on the costume of a baseball player and prepared the glass orb, chewing on his gum and...preparing his preparations of prepping. Screwball adjusted her grip on her bat, and nodded. Psycho did the same and threw the projectile. It was a homerun! In fact, it was a homerun with every single one of the balls.

"Woo! That was awesome!" Screwball shouted.

"I know! It was fun! Now let's steamroll over these guys and get back to pranking."

Before anything could happen, Screwball found herself impaled by thorns erupting from the ground, said thorns being orange with pulsating yellow veins within them. Sociopath was there. Before Psycho could free his beloved, the spikes exploded, causing her to vanish in a puff of smoke. He just stared at the scene with a wide smile.

"Awww. Did I kill her? So sad. Now I'll do the same to you."

"Eh."

"...EH?! Why 'eh'?!"

"She'll be back anyways. That doesn't mean I'm not horrified by what you just did anyways."

"Then come at me!"

Psycho appeared right behind Sociopath and kicked him hard, somehow making the green stallion faceplant downwards.

"Ahahaha! That's how you do it! I'll enjoy taking my revenge on you after so lo--"

Everypony stopped what they were doing as a massive thunderbolt struck the ground and ran across it, cutting away both Psycho and Sociopath. Everypony looked up to see the mages from the tower arriving by air, the unicorns using levitation magic to keep themselves steady. On the other side, the royal guards were coming too, their massive weights making them kick up more dust than usual. The green stallion simply laughed at what was unfolding and began to yell.

"A three-way battle? Excellent! I'll show you pathetic royal guards why the Council's Militia was a much better organization!"


In Canterlot, everypony was mumbling, their panic apparent in many ways. Several returned to their homes to hide, but two in particular were just walking to a simple white house embedded in the streets.

"He's in there." Star Prophet said dryly.

"Good!" Jack kicked the door down.

The stallion's chalk white coat matched his black mane and tail with the same color of streaks going through them. His red eyes stared at another white stallion simply taking tea.

"What is this intrusion!"

"Stop that, Bloody Red. we know it's you." Star growled.

"Oh really? Then I guess you won't mind that I cut you up?" he spat back with a sip of tea.

"Try it!"

"More red paint!"