• Published 28th Aug 2020
  • 2,877 Views, 17 Comments

Hidden Scars and Heavy Hearts - frenettek314



Weeks after the Fall Formal, Sunset Shimmer, swearing to follow the side of good, has successfully rebuilt the wall from her destruction. She is now completely free from her past...or is she? Can two friends help her through her troubles?

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"But My Present Starts Right Now"

Thankful that Sunset's emotional runaway happened with only one period left in the school day - and for the two ladies dashing through the streets of Canterlot that that last period happened to be study hall, they frantically began their trek to a somewhat low-budget apartment building a few blocks away from the school.

As the two girls peered up at the modest space, catching their breaths from the heavy sprinting, Fluttershy managed to find her voice first.

"Are... are you sure she... lives here?" she panted, holding onto her legs for dear life.

"Pretty sure... my Pinkie Sense is never wrong in emergencies." the recovering form of Pinkie breathed.

The response seemed to quell any retorts her girlfriend had, knowing that the legend of the "Pinkie Sense" was a pretty accurate oddity all things considered.

With one more minute to steady their breathing, the two girls nodded their heads in unison, bracing themselves for whatever came next.

Pinkie decided to knock on the door with strong enough force.

"Sunset! It's us! Please tell us you're in there!"

"...go away..." a steadfast whimper muttered from inside, confirming the location of their search. Though the miserable and weak-sounding form of the normally loud teenager was not a comforting fact for the two.

"Sunset, I hate to do this, but I think it's best if we come inside." Fluttershy announced, secretly hoping the door was unlocked, "We're not sure you should be alone right now." Pinkie nervously nodding her head in agreement.

"Go away! Please!" Sunset more vocally chorused, making the two girls wince at the girl's desperate plea.

But they couldn't just leave her alone and take her word for it. Not after what they saw. Those long thick cuts coursing down her wrists. Even just thinking about it made their stomachs queasy.

"Please forgive us Sunset." Fluttershy begged inwardly.

With one forceful shove from the surprisingly strong Pinkie Pie, the two girls thankfully made their way inside the small, dark apartment, only to freeze in absolute panic at what they saw.

"SUNSET!"

There, huddled against the corner of the kitchen island sat the quivering, broken form of Sunset, wielding a sharp looking knife in her vibrating hands, the tool hovering over one of her wrists as if to suggest she was preparing for a slash.

"Pl...please go away! Let me do this!" the bawling form pleaded at her new arrivals. "I deserve this!"

Wasting no apparent time or energy, Pinkie quickly and smoothly darted up towards her, snatching the knife out of her hands with tears pouring down her face while the pitiful looking form of Fluttershy quickly tackled the girl, holding her tight.

"S-Sunset, please stop! This isn't healthy! We-we need you!" she choked out, latching onto the girl for dear life as Pinkie proceeded to drop the knife in the sink with disgust, almost as if she was worried it'd come out and attack them.

"No you don't! The only thing you two need is me to be dead! Gilda was right - everyone wants me gone and I don't blame them!"

"Sunset, no! That's not true! We want you here with us, we want to see you at school." Pinkie countered, rubbing the shivering girl's shoulder.

Then, with a sudden burst of intensity, Sunset managed to pry herself from the two miserable girls in front of her, taking a few cautious steps back and yelling at them through clenched eyes.

"STOP LYING! I'VE NEVER BEEN WANTED IN MY LIFE!"

Gripping onto herself out of the fear she may collapse, she continued her tirade at a lower screaming volume.

"All my life I've been alone! All I've ever wanted to do was to have others believe in me, to show them that I could be something great, but has that ever worked out?! No! Back in Equestria, I thought my parents would be proud that I became Princess Celestia's personal pupil, but all that did was set their expectations higher! I kept pushing myself for the princess, but all that did was net me with the feeling that I wasn't good enough!"

She then opened her eyes, glancing at the two attentive people in front of her.

"Then I come to this world and try to prove to everyone back home that I'm not some sort of mistake by trying to rule the school and what did that do?! I made others fear me, I tore apart friends and made everyone's lives worse, I thought I became popular but I was nothing but a damn stuck up pariah!"

"In fact, because of my idiotic scheme, I unknowingly made you two split up! I made you two miserable!"

Pinkie and Fluttershy gasped in horror. They knew she was behind the text that broke them apart but they never thought she would feel overwhelming guilt because of it. They didn't want to blame it all on her though- they should've known each other better, they should've talked it out, but they didn't. Sunset's plan worked. Too well.

But that was in the past and they were now happy once again; though Sunset obviously took that as a different sign.

"So if anything, you two should be the first to want me in a grave!"

Another horrified gasp.

"Sunset, that's not true! Please stop!" Pinkie pleaded, her hair falling flat as Fluttershy felt her knees wobble.

Sunset paused for a second as she found a small bitter smirk etch on her face, her tears still freely falling.

If the two girls weren't concerned about the former villain before, they were definitely pained now.

"The worst part is it took me almost destroying the school and a rainbow laser to the face to realize how much of a fuck up I am." she spoke that line with such a calm callousness it was downright terrifying.

Her smile fell once more as she felt her form wobble.

"My whole existence has been nothing but a damn lie!"

The weight finally sent Sunset down to her knees, her hands placed firmly over her head as she clenched her crawling body steady.

"I thought with everything I did I could be happy, I could be loved! But that wasn't true! I was still alone, I still felt the pressures of pushing myself forward, clawing my way to the top."

One final push.

"I'VE BEEN NOTHING BUT A PATHETIC WASTE OF SPACE MY WHOLE LIFE AND IT'S ALL MY FAULT! I'M ALWAYS GOING TO BE ALONE, I'M ALWAYS GOING TO BE A MONSTER FOR WHAT I'VE DONE! I'VE NEVER DESERVED ANYTHING IN MY LIFE! THE ONLY THING I DESERVE IS FOR ME TO BE DEAD - AT LEAST I WON'T HURT ANYONE EVER AGAIN!"

Her voice cracked with that final shout, the last of the tears she had left finally falling.

"I'm so sorry. For everything. I-I just wanted... I didn't want... I'm so sorry..."

Sunset continued to cry until she felt the bristles of long silky pink hair caressing her cheek. Glancing up, she saw the form of Fluttershy capturing her in a tender embrace, feeling the girl's own tears on the back of her leather jacket.

"I know you don't believe us right now, but what I'm telling you is the complete, honest truth. You're never going to be alone again. We want you here. With us. We want to help you."

Sunset sniffled.

"You shouldn't. I haven't earned anything. I was a giant jerk, especially to you."

"We all make mistakes."

The red head scoffed.

"Those weren't mistakes. What I did was intentional. Maybe I didn't know the full extent and consequences behind them, but they weren't accidents."

Fluttershy released herself as she stared at the girl with a warm, gentle smile on her face. A smile so gentle it could radiate more warmth than the sun.

"Tell me. Knowing what you know now and realizing the errors you made, would you ever bully me again?"

"Of course not!" came an automatic reply.

"Would you ever try to brainwash the school and threaten other worlds again?"

"Absolutely not!"

"Now tell me - the polite behavior you've carried out these last few weeks; the work you've done to repair the wall, do you regret doing any of it?"

Sunset paused for a moment before she found a tiny grin at the base of her lips.

"Not at all."

"Then that's good enough for me." Fluttershy beamed, hugging the now less startled girl once again. "You've shown me that you truly feel awful for all the things you did, but most importantly, you've shown everyone that you're willing to change - even if they don't believe you. You even came to me and Pinkie's rescue when no one else would, even though you could've gotten yourself more injured than you did."

"You've earned my forgiveness Sunset Shimmer. You've earned the chance to be one of my dearest friends."

"Fluttershy..." Sunset whimpered, before feeling a pink form hugging her over the shoulder.

"And that goes double for me! I was still a little peeved at everything you did, but what Fluttershy said is true. You've really made a difference in yourself the last few weeks, even when others made it tough for you. You still took the time to atone for your mistakes and protect those who needed it. You're a hero, Sunset! Our hero!"

"Pinkie..." Sunset hastily choked, though her tears were officially spent out. "I don't deserve you two."

Pinkie chuckled slightly, cupping Sunset's cheeks with her hands, Fluttershy glancing over at the display with a knowing giggle.

"That's the funny thing about friendship. Friendship isn't necessarily about you deserving someone, it's about those who care for you - whether you feel like you've earned it or not."

"But we want you to feel like you've earned it, Sunset. We want to help you, so please - after all the hard work we've seen you do and the sacrifice you made for us - please let us help you in return." Fluttershy added.

Sunset felt herself at a loss for words, until slowly, a wide-spread appreciative smile stretched across her face.

"Ok. I'll try."


After a while, Sunset soon found herself seated on the couch in her little makeshift living room; her two classmates... no, her friends seated one on each side of her, nestling her into a "friend sandwich" as Pinkie called it.

The comfortable silence etched on for a moment before it was ultimately broken by Fluttershy.

"I know we just had a long, emotional discussion, but I'm afraid we still need to talk about... those." she grimly said, gesturing to the embedded cuts on the girl's wrists.

Despite her earlier panic when discovered, Sunset found herself calmed by the two sweet ladies around her.

"I guess we do, huh?" she sighed, though a well-meaning smile laid on her face, masking the redness in her puffy eyes.

"How long?" Pinkie coldly stated, glancing at the marks like they were an evil entity.

"Ever since the Fall Formal ended. The first time was the following Monday when I returned to school. I've been glared at, intentionally tripped, got called all the swear words under the sun, even received an ominous death treat once."

Both girls gasped at the last one.

"Oh my! Do you know who it was?" Fluttershy timidly asked.

"No clue. Though, that was the only incident of that nature. Still... ever since that day, I've received nothing but harsh words and even harsher looks." Sunset concluded, her head lowering down to her waist.

"Why didn't you try to seek help?!" Pinkie incredulously exclaimed, her hand gripped onto Sunset's shoulder.

"Who was I supposed to go to? If word got around, people would either encourage me to continue doing it or they would brush it off as me 'seeking attention and sympathy'."

Though the two kind-hearted teenagers didn't want to believe Sunset's rather bitter disposition, seeing the reactions aimed at her during school made them realize she probably wasn't too far off from the truth, sad as it was.

"What about Vice-Principal Luna or Principal Celestia?" Fluttershy offered.

"Same thing. They'd probably be under heavy attack if anyone found out they took pity on me. And you know how fast word spreads around the school - with or without me." she gave a bittersweet smirk at the end.

"Well... honestly, before today, I may have to agree that you didn't have many safe outlets, but still - we're not going to just sit here and watch this happen!" Pinkie argued.

"I know but..." before Pinkie's words caught up with Sunset, "Wait... before today?"

"Mmm-hmm. You're our friend now and friends don't let friends hurt one another. We'll take you to see the school therapist and we'll protect you so that no one hurts you again. We'll help you no matter what it takes!" Pinkie boldly declared, earning a smile from the other two girls.

Sunset's quickly diminished however.

"No, no. I couldn't ask you to do that. Besides, everyone will turn on you two if they see you being nice to me."

"So what?" came a somewhat bitter response; the surprise however was that it came from the least likely source.

Pinkie and Sunset's mouths hung open, eyes widened as they acknowledged the narrowed, pointed look of the normally sweet and shy girl.

"Who cares what they think? I saw a couple of students walk past us, ignoring us when we were being harassed by Gilda. If they want to ridicule us for being with the only person that actually helped us, then that's their problem. And if I see anyone poking fun at you or your suicide attempts, they can answer to me!" Fluttershy boldly claimed before snapping out of her trance slightly, a blush developing on her determined gaze.

"Go Fluttershy!" Pinkie enthusiastically clapped, kissing her girlfriend on the cheek, the blush only deepening while Sunset gave a teasing smirk.

Another thought suddenly occurred to Sunset, throwing their plan back into the pits again.

"What about your other friends? I don't know what you've seen but Rarity openly scoffs at me, Applejack keeps a hawk's eye on me, and I'm pretty sure Rainbow wouldn't hesitate to throw a punch if she saw me near you two."

The two girls looked at each other in pondering for a moment before Fluttershy retorted with a similar bitter expression.

"Same thing. We say you're our friend and nothing's going to change that. They may take longer to accept you, possibly even longer to call you a friend, but if they have any real problems with that, then they can talk to us about it."

"I've missed your assertive side." Pinkie giggled, much to her partner's chagrin.

Fluttershy blushed though she did humorously roll her eyes as she gave her partner a small wry grin.

"Besides, Twilight did assure us that you could change. She even said that we should 'look out for you'." she added.

Sunset smiled fondly. Princess Twilight - a former adversary who now saw such potential in her. She owed the newest alicorn back in Equestria everything for this moment. If she ever came back to this world, Sunset promised she wouldn't disappoint her.

"You... you really mean all of this?" Sunset asked, slight hesitation in her voice.

"Of course! It'll be super duper fun to have you as a friend after so long! I'll even go to therapy with you for as long as you want me to if you're nervous." Pinkie squeaked in delight.

"Me too! Though I would like a promise that you try not to cut yourself anymore. If you begin having these depressing thoughts again, please know that you can always talk to one of us or Celestia and Luna I'm sure." Fluttershy added.

"Obviously this isn't a problem that can be fixed overnight. Heck, you'll probably have some bad thoughts for a long time; but if you talk to us, go to therapy, let others who want to help you around, then you can hopefully start to feel better. It'll be a long road, but you don't have to do this alone. Please. Let us help you." Pinkie stated warmly, still standing next to Fluttershy as the two shared hopeful looks directed at Sunset.

Sunset took one more precautionary glance at the two girls in front of her. As she gazed into their eyes, she could see nothing but the sweet sincerity of these two once enemies wanting to support her anyway they can. They were being genuine. They could love her.

They did love her.

She was no longer alone.

"Deal..." Sunset warmly stated, "...on one condition."

"I get to call you the cutest couple at Canterlot High." she finished with a triumphant smile.

"Deal!" Pinkie enthusiastically agreed, eagerly shaking the red-head's hand.

"W-w-what?" Fluttershy squeaked, her face turning as bright red as a tomato.

"That's not helping your argument, Fluttershy." Sunset quipped, earning a snort from Pinkie.

"She's an award winner in cuteness." Pinkie sagely agreed.

"Y-you two are so embarrassing." Fluttershy mumbled, before glancing over at the utter joy being chorused through the two ladies in front of her. Not only was Pinkie super happy, Sunset was finally displaying a sincere smile after so long, her bubbly laughter warming the shy girl's heart.

Fluttershy couldn't help but smile at the two in front of her. If they were happy, she could take a little light teasing.

"Come here." she immediately said, wrapping the two in a group hug.

As Sunset felt the comfort circulating around her, she couldn't help but blissfully smile. This. This right here is what she had wanted for so long.

She was happy.

She was respected.

She was loved.

And she was going to get better.

"You two are the best." she sincerely stated, nestling her way tighter into the embrace, hopeful there'd be many more to come.


Three Weeks Later:

"Hey girls, we're back!" Pinkie cheerful voice called out, making the three girls currently seated at the cafeteria table turn their heads to the new arrivals with warm smiles.

"Sup girls?" Rainbow called back, "How did the therapy session go?"

Sunset now smiled as she took her usual spot next to Pinkie Pie (who seated herself next to Fluttershy).

"Great! Of course the fact that I skipped out on that Pre-Calc test makes things sweeter, but..."

The group laughed, until Rarity cleared her throat with a more serious expression.

"And how are you feeling, darling?"

Thankfully for everyone there, Sunset simply smiled.

"Better. Quite a bit, actually. I haven't felt bad about myself in a week."

"Glad to hear it, sugarcube!" Applejack exclaimed happily, the others offering similar praises.

"Thank you - everybody. I know I've said this a bunch over the past few weeks, but I'm not sure where I'd be if it wasn't for all of you giving me a second chance."

"Well, it wasn't easy at first..." Rainbow began before a hard shove in the shoulder from the cowgirl re-routed her speech. "...but you deserved it."

"Indeed. We're so glad we have this much happier version of you instead of that bitter, angry one." Rarity agreed.

"And while we're happy to see yer improving, please don't think yer out of the woods yet. If ya'll ever feel like..." Applejack began to warn before she was stopped by a warm smiling Sunset.

"...I know and I will. I know that things won't always be easy, but I know I'm not alone. And besides, I'm happy taking it one step at a time."

The whole table shared a round of smiles, delighted to see the girl was genuinely improving. She was healthier.

"I'm happy to be here too. Though, none of this would've been possible without you two," she said, gesturing to Pinkie and Fluttershy.

"Thank you both. For everything. You're the best friends I could ever have."

Pinkie placed a hand over her heart as her smile quivered, while Fluttershy felt tears threatening to take control, quickly dabbing her eyes with a tissue.

The group all tenderly smiled at the moment.

Funny to think, not even two months ago, Sunset Shimmer would've found the prospect of making friends to be a waste of time; nothing more than a hindrance to achieve her goals - but how wrong she was. She was never actually happy back then - all she really wanted deep down was to feel like she mattered, to feel like she was worth it to somebody. Now however, as she toured around the circle of friends - the ones who she once split apart, now reunited and even adding her into the mix, she knew that friendship was a very powerful thing indeed.

It helped you overcome your weaknesses.

It comforted you whenever you felt forgotten or invaluable.

It encouraged you to become a better person.

For so long, Sunset had neglected everything for the simple goal of trying to prove herself to everyone; now though she knew what really mattered. The ones who surrounded her were truly the most important...

"Stupid Bitch." a male student muttered glaring at the crowd of girls seated as he passed on by.

Before any of the five now seething girls could call this punk out however, a new voice took control of the situation.

"What was that, tough guy?!"

The student anxiously turned around only to see a venomous glare pointed directly upon him, a fist-like motion made at him... scratch that, make that two glares with gestures.

"N-nothing." he quickly stuttered before sprinting away.

Sunset smirked as she and the rest of her gang addressed the two rescuers.

"Lyra. Bon-Bon. Looking good."

Bon-Bon gave a light blush, while Lyra simply rolled her eyes.

"Sunset. Quite the kidder as usual."

"You know it. Care to join us for lunch?"

The couple gave appreciative smiled, making it now a group of eight at the table.

"Don't mind if we do." thanked Lyra.

As the girls all found themselves engaged in laughter and playful banter, Sunset couldn't help but look down at her jacket sleeves, silently pulling them back to reveal the gradually fading scars on her arms. She was healing.

Suddenly her past self came into her state of mind.

"If this isn't who I'm supposed to be, who am I?"

But the girl couldn't help but playfully hum as she answered the voice right back.

"I'm Sunset Shimmer and I'm a student, a sarcastic jokester, a devoted learner, an artist, a heck of a guitarist (if I do say so myself),..."

"...but most importantly, I'm a friend."

Author's Note:

And that concludes my first ever "Equestria Girls" story.


Not going to lie, Sunset's a pretty fun character to write, may have to do it more often.


Anyways, I hope you found my ideas for "post first movie" entertaining and I hope you found Sunset's struggles to be heartfelt and genuine.


Take care of yourselves and be the change you want to be in yourself. And don't forget to help those you care about and seek help from them as well along the way.



Sincerely,

-frenettek314

Comments ( 13 )

10407831
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10408263

Well, that was surprisingly faster than I expected, but the wait is over! (I had it mostly finished earlier, but editing went by pretty smoothly.) Feel free to check out the rest if interested.

What is the most important step a man can take? The next one. Always the next step.

Well...

I read the first chapter yesterday and I was ready to strap in for a 50k minimum exploration of Sunset's depression anxiety and mental illness, and it's over.

That's not to say it was bad, far from it, it was an enjoyable read, it was just a bit quick for the subject matter, I thought. It would have been nice to see those three weeks instead of skipping them, or to see Sunset's therapy sessions, or to see how the others become friends with her.

10409225
Yeah, I’m sorry, but with certain events picking back up (I luckily found a small break here), I didn’t want to start a long story only to not finish it and leave it hanging. Anything I post here for a while will be relatively shorter. My apologies though - definitely recommend the fics I posted in the author’s note of the first chapter.

This was tragic but in the end it came out nice and heartwarming

"Thank you for your help, Sunset Shimmer. I'm sorry I didn't step in sooner but I wanted to have enough evidence for someone's permanent ban from this school. She's been too much of a nuisance for far too long."

That's... Luna is confessing to being criminally negligent in this situation. She, an authority figure in charge of the safety of the students, knowingly and willingly allows one student to assault another. If this was to go to the cops, (or worse, the parents) she'd probably be just as up a creek without a paddle as Gilda. :pinkiecrazy:

Otherwise this was an enjoyable read. Really dig the addition of Lyra and Bonnie into the little group of friends! :twilightsmile:

I loved it. Way better than I could do. I commend you.

Good story. Handles the subject of depression and anxiety fairly well. It's a little bit short for my taste considering the subject, but not every story involving those particular feelings needs to be a 20,000+ word deep dive exploring the ins and outs of such strong and powerful emotions. Sometimes it's just good to read a story that's short and sweet.

This story smacked your get an upvote

"Y-you two are so embarrassing." Fluttershy mumbled, before glancing over at the utter joy being chorused through the two ladies in front of her. Not only was Pinkie super happy, Sunset was finally displaying a sincere smile after so long, her bubbly laughter warming the shy girl's heart.

Tsundere-shy, I see... :ajsmug:

"Who cares what they think? I saw a couple of students walk past us, ignoring us when we were being harassed by Gilda. If they want to ridicule us for being with the only person that actually helped us, then that's their problem. And if I see anyone poking fun at you or your suicide attempts, they can answer to me!" Fluttershy boldly claimed before snapping out of her trance slightly, a blush developing on her determined gaze.

That's my assertive girl!!!!

This was an excellent story! There were a few places with word choice that made me raise an eyebrow, but nothing that took me out of the story. Great work!

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