Keep Me Up

by Meteor_Mirage

I'm always out of time

Rumble sighed softly in his bed as he stared blankly up at his ceiling. He’d been like this for a few hours, wracking his brain for the hundredth time about his most recent problem. One that had been bothering him for weeks at this point.

Writer’s block.

He’d spent quite a bit of those weeks in this same position, glaring into the blank expanse of his ceiling to find some form of answer to his questions. The words he was in a dire need of to start, hoping that they’d be enough motivation to follow through to the end.

Instead, like always, he found a mix of aggravation, anxiety, and self-doubt. And, like always, he moved into step two of his three step cycle.

With a groan, he peeled himself from his bedsheets and kicked his hindlegs over the edge of his bed, taking a moment to wipe away the sweat from his brow before planting his hooves on the ground.

The grey colt hesitated before approaching the desk that sat across the room, still the same as the last time he’d been through this cycle. And the time before that. And the time before that.

It was immaculately clean from one of the previous times he’d approached as he had hoped that maybe straightening his room up would help with his focus. All it accomplished was him having a cleaner room to pace about in and stress further.

As he sat down, Rumble found himself glaring down at the mostly blank notebook before him. He gripped a pencil in his hoof and hovered it above the page, hoping somewhat that a half-formed thought he had just before slipping in and out of consciousness in his bed for a few hours.

Rumble scribbled a few words, then erased them just as quickly. He proceeded to do this another three times, leaving a horrid stain of smudged graphite in the top line of his page, before tossing his pencil aside with a frustrated growl.

Its tip stuck in his wall next to the previous discarded writing utensils, proving that you don’t need a cutie mark in darts to be any good at it.

Rumble sat back in his chair, breathing a sigh to calm himself as he pulled out another pencil to just try again. He ripped the marred paper out of his notebook, balling it and his aggression up as small as possible, and tossed it behind him into a wastebasket.

He missed, the paper ball instead landing among the rest of the flock, as, unlike darts, basketball wasn’t exactly in Rumble’s repertoire of skills. Ignoring this and instead leaning forward again, Rumble grabbed for the only paper that had any words on it, though none of his own design.

The rubric that Cheerilee had handed out for this project was as clear-cut as anything she gave to her class. It was just meant to be a three page paper on ‘Your Most Important Moment,’ graded on spelling, organization, style, and just general quality.

Simple and open-ended, maybe even deceptively so, making it perfect for the first grade back from summer vacation. A deadline that, upon looking at the calendar on the edge of his desk, Rumble noticed was quickly approaching and only two days away. Upon this realization, the grey colt threw his head back and emitted a short, sharp groan at the revelation of his situation.

Clearly something needed to change.

Dragging himself up from his desk and hopping off his chair, he slowly stretched his body out. The aches and pains from spending so many hours in bed, trying his hardest to “write” his paper in his mind meat, finally made themselves known, and Rumble had the urge to return to try “writing” yet again.

Or, more realistically, he’d phase in and out of consciousness until he tried to write again.

He nearly broke, taking a few cursory steps towards his warm and inviting bed, before shaking his head and letting out a small sigh. He clearly needed something to do that wasn’t just pacing around his room, taking a nap, and struggling against his own brain to produce a simple essay.

He needed something beyond the boundaries of his own bedroom.

Rumble stared out the window of his bedroom, something he’d done many times in his search for Inspiration. He saw quite a few ponies making their way through the streets without a care in the world. He even saw a few of his friends who were extremely nonchalant about flaunting their freedom from Cheerilee’s assignment.

As he watched, or more glared, as the Cutie Mark Crusaders paraded their way down the street on their way to whatever adventure they had planned next, Rumble knew that he needed an escape of his own.

Looking at the clock on his wall, he saw that the time stood at 12:30. With a heavy sigh, Rumble concluded that if he was to take the walk he believed he needed, he’d have to make it quick.

Just as Rumble was approaching his door, moving to open it and hopefully get through the rest of the house unharmed, he was quickly distracted by the sound of a door unlocking and being pushed open in another room.

Thunderlane was home.

Or perhaps his house had just been broken into by a courteous thief.

Either way, the teenage colt now had an obstacle.

Rumble waited a few moments before leaving his room, not wanting to make immediately it obvious that he desperately needed equine contact. He waited for a long, dejected sigh and the sound of keys clinking onto a table, as only then did he know that his brother had begun to relax.

Perhaps he could just sneak by while he was distracted? It was a good idea in the short term, but it would definitely have lasting consequences if caught.

Opening his door slowly, with as much care as possible, Rumble immediately caught the eye of Thunderlane, who was already on his way down the hallway that led to Rumble’s room. Caught off-guard, the tired and haggard Wonderbolt only had an instant to straighten up and force a grin, waving at Rumble as he entered Big Brother Mode.

“Heeeeeey! What’s up, little dude?” The tall, dark grey stallion asked. “I was just coming to check on how that essay was going.” His grin, as wide and kind as it may have been, spoke fear into Rumble’s heart.

Rumble averted his gaze, looking anywhere but at his brother as he chuckled nervously. “Well it’s, uh, going!” He said as he scratched the back of his neck. “I’d show you, but I was just about to head out so...”

To his credit, Rumble still did try to follow through with his plan, giving it his all in attempting to brush past his brother on his way to the outside world.

Despite this, Thunderlane blocked his path with an extended foreleg, shooting his little brother a curious look. “Hey now, we talked about this.” He sighed as he gave his head a small shake. “I know, it’s summer, so you just want to go and play with your friends. But you’ve gotta finish your schoolwork first, dude.”

“I’ll get it done!” Rumble complained almost immediately, rolling his eyes with the amount of angst that only a teenager could manage. “I just need to take a walk and clear my head. Then I’ll start my essay.”

There was a small moment of silence between the two of them, giving Rumble a very nice moment to catch his breath and raise his head in triumph, sure that his brother would consider his perspective valid and allow him egress.

And in that moment, Thunderlane indeed did himself some considering. Despite being absolutely exhausted, his brain was still able to piece two bits of information together into a coherent thought.

Though it did take him another few moments, he blinked his eyes a few times and tilted his head, looking to his little brother curiously. “Wait, start your essay? Rumble!”

Thunderlane’s shout caught the both of them off-guard, causing another abrupt moment of silence between them. The slate grey pegasus stood stock-still for some time before stomping a hoof, the very same he was blocking Rumble with moments previous, onto the ground.

With a soft huff, he eyed Rumble warily before motioning down the hallway. “Go sit in the living room. We need to have a talk.” And, without letting his little brother have room for response, Thunderlane turned and walked to wait for him.

Now left alone in the hallway, Rumble only had one option. Well, he had two if he wanted to jump out the window in his room, but self-defenestration didn’t seem to be in the cards today. Perhaps next week.

Instead, he made his slow, trudging march to the living room, breathing a slow sigh as he steeled himself for the lecture of the century he was sure he’d be getting in just a moment.

Upon arrival, however, the living room was strangely empty with Thunderlane nowhere to be seen. For the slightest moment, Rumble considered that maybe this could be his chance, but he quickly realized that he would probably be better off following orders . So he simply sat down on the couch against the wall and twiddled his hooves as he waited.

It took almost no time for Rumble to get bored with waiting, wanting to get the argument over with so that he could just go back to brooding and being frustrated in his room. To occupy himself, he found solace in inspecting his familiar surroundings in the hopes that whatever Thunderlane was doing wouldn’t take that long.

The table in front of him, a well-worn wooden table that had been beaten up from years of use in many of the brothers’ previous homes, was absolutely littered with sports magazines of varying ages, some months old while others printed as far back as before Rumble was born. Rumble thought to take one and pass the time with that, finding immense interest in one depicting the Wonderbolts’ newest recruit, Spitfire.

However, upon moving it, he revealed just the corner of a tapestry of water damage, cracks, and wood warping that was just as old as the magazines, if not older. Though it did have some recent additions in the recent past.

Neither brother had learned what a coaster was until it was far far too late.

Placing the magazine back to hide his shame, he was forced to find something else to occupy himself with.

Depressingly, the room was otherwise very sparse aside from a few piles of trash that littered the floor. Due to being Thunderlane’s second bedroom, meaning he’d pass out on that sofa whenever he couldn’t make it to his bed just a few yards away, it was clear of anything that would distract the Wonderbolt from passing out for twelve hours. All that was left was whatever he brought with him on a half-dazed shopping trip between work and home and then consumed almost immediately.

Before he could try in vain to find another distraction, Rumble was startled by the sound of whirring in the other room. After a moment of confusion and concern, the following sound of trickling liquid served to remind the young stallion of his brother’s recent, and most assuredly needed, purchase of a coffee machine.

It was only moments later that Thunderlane made his reappearance, this time with a large cup of coffee to hopefully help alleviate his tiredness. He took no time to settle down opposite his brother, sitting on the floor and placing his coffee cup precariously on the pile of magazines.

There was a long silence between the two of them, the only sound being the ambient noises of their small home and the infrequent sips Thunderlane took from his drink.

As his cup neared half-full, or maybe half-empty as Rumble saw it, the dark grey stallion finally cut the silence with sudden: “Alright!” Thunderlane said, letting out a sigh of what seemed to be relief, though Rumble was unable to notice as he was far too busy being startled out of his skin.

Ignoring this, or perhaps being more interested in the magazines on the table, Thunderlane just continued. “So, how can I help you get started on this essay of yours?” He asked simply, looking to his little brother to provide all the answers.

It took Rumble quite a bit to process the question, reeling from the utter lack of anger or disappointment in his brother’s tone. He looked at Thunderlane with a bit of hesitance and warriness. “Well, uh, I guess I still need something to write about.” He offered a shrug as he scratched the back of his neck nervously.

Thunderlane blinked, then tilted his head with a confused look to Rumble. “Hoooold on, you told me you were writing about our trip to Appleloosa.” He complained with a bit of a whine. “You could probably write an entire book on how fun that trip was!”

Rumble rolled his eyes with a small chuckle. “Yeah totally. My favorite part was when you signed me up for Mild West Dancing lessons so you and Brae could hit the bars.”

This garnered quite the sly grin from Thunderlane, though he tried his best to hide it behind his coffee cup. What he couldn’t hide, however, was the loud laugh he gave after the sip of his drink. “Aw, come on! You know it was great! You even got a little outfit and everything.”

As his brother shot him a wordless glare, all Thunderlane could do was put up his hooves defensively. “Okay, alright, it was totally more important to me. But there’s no way you didn’t like spending time with your ol’ ‘Uncle Braeburn.’”

Rumble couldn’t even begin to hold back his sudden, loud snicker at that, though he did try his best to hide his face behind his hooves as he shook his head. “Nooo, you can’t just bring that up now. I just spent the last three years trying to forget how awkward that was.”

“Aw come on, it was sweet.” Thunderlane rebutted, though even he couldn’t resist a few chuckles of his own. “I’m pretty sure he still doesn’t believe you’re just my little brother, but at least his heart was in the right place.” With a soft hum, the dark grey pegasus shrugged.

“Are you and him still, you know…” Rumble asked, though he trailed off at the end, preferring to instead press the tips of his forehooves together suggestively. “I mean, I guess with all your Wonderbolt stuff, you’re probably too busy for stuff like that.”

“Well he’s with Soarin’ now, so I guess it wasn’t the Wonderbolt thing that he broke it off for.” Letting out a small, mournful sigh, Thunderlane shrugged again. This was followed by a moment of silence, but one quickly broken as the stallion tilted his head slightly. “Hey, well, what if you wrote about that time I took you flying with the Bolts? You could totally write a page and a half on that, and with a little embellishing you can probably stretch it to however long you need it.”

“I dunno, Scootaloo said she’s probably gonna do hers on her first flight with you guys and Rainbow Dash, and it seems way more important to her than it was to me.” Rumble flopped back against the couch he was sitting on, throwing up his hooves in defeat before crossing them across his chest. “I just don’t know what else I could write about.”

Tapping his head gently with a hoof, Thunderlane wracked his brain for whatever he could do to help. “Well what are the rest of your friends writing about? Maybe that’ll help.”

“Apple Bloom has her family or her potion making with Zecora, Sweetie Belle is writing about her first concert, and Snips and Snails are probably writing about each other for all I know.” Rumble wrapped his forelegs across his chest tighter as he let out a deep sigh. “Kettle and Skedaddle are writing about that Cutie Mark Camp, but only because they actually got their marks there. And, you know,” he trailed off with another sigh, gesturing briefly to the blank of his flank before returning to his pouting stance.

“And Pipsqueak?” Thunderlane asked simply.

And he at first received a similarly simple response of a gentle shrug before Rumble explained. “He left for Trottingham before I could ask him, and I’ve been too cooped up here, being grounded and all, to know if he’s back yet or not.”

“Well that’s not exactly my fault, now is it?” The older stallion asked, rolling his eyes.

There was a long beat of silence that fell after that question, both boys shuffling a bit uncomfortably as they sat. The silence was only broken after a grumble from the dark grey stallion. “Well, I’m already all out of ideas. Unless you’re willing to rethink that Appleoosa one.” He waited for Rumble’s response, a roll of the eyes and a slight smirk, before continuing. “Thought not. I dunno, unless you can think of any other way I can help, I think I can just support you on the sidelines.”

“I still think I just need a walk to clear my head.” Rumble explained, garnering an eyebrow raise from his older brother. “I’m serious! It’s way too hard to think of something new when I’m just looking at the same stuff all the time!”

Thunderlane was silent. For a moment, Rumble thought this was a bad sign, though his fears were pushed aside the second his brother began to nod in agreement.

“If you think it’ll help.” Thunderlane sighed with a shrug. With this, he stood up from the floor and began to brush himself off. “I guess I could get a few things done with you out of the house.”

“Like inviting that one wizard pony over instead of just staring at him from across the market?” Rumble asked with a smirk as he too stood up, but just the sight of the bright red flush of his brother’s face was enough to turn his smirk into a grin while he began to walk towards the front door..

As Thunderlane tried his best to hide his blush with a hoof, he grumbled towards his little brother. “Well I meant more cleaning up your disaster of a room, but I guess that works too.” He said. Giving up on hiding his growing blush after a moment, he stamped his hoof down to draw Rumble’s attention. “Woah, hold on. Ground rules before you go.”

Rumble quickly spun around to face his brother again, tilting his head questioningly as he did so.

Thunderlane took a moment to straighten his mane and figure out just what to say, brushing a hoof through his light blue mohawk. Breathing a long sigh, he shook his head. “So, ground rules, right. First of all, you’re waaay grounded. Like, for the next month.” The pegasus stallion waited for a beat to see Rumble’s reaction, clearly expecting something less reserved than the soft pout and shrug the teenage colt actually managed.

After another beat, Thunderlane continued. “Right, well, second: Tomorrow, you’re starting and finishing your essay. I don’t care if it’s the worst thing you’ve ever written, but it’s getting done. You can make the grade up later.” Another beat, and no arguments from Rumble. “Finally: Just get back before dark.” He ran another hoof through his mane. “That’s pretty much it. Grounded, writing, home before dark.”

Rumble breathed a sigh of relief, expecting much worse than just more of a grounding for basically lying to his brother for weeks. He waited for a short moment, thinking that his brother might want to add another last-minute stipulation to his punishment. Finding nothing, he finally continued a speedy approach to the front door.

At the last moment, just as Rumble placed his hoof on the doorknob, he was interrupted with a, “Woah wait, hold on, one more thing,” from Thunderlane.

Spinning around slowly, Rumble was only given a short moment to dodge the umbrella that was suddenly hurtling towards him. As quick on his hooves as Rumble was, all he could do was dodge the brunt of the hit while the handle of the umbrella smacked him square in the cheek before clattering uselessly against the ground.

“You were supposed to catch that.” Thunderlane said as he watched his brother gently rub his cheek. Thankfully the lack of weight to the object allowed the pain to fade quickly, meaning Thunderlane could quickly sweep it under the rug. “A rain is scheduled for later, and I don’t want you drenched when you get back. And don’t think getting sick is gonna give you extra time on your essay.”

While Rumble hadn’t considered it earlier, he was most assuredly thinking about it now. Despite this, however, he still picked up the umbrella and tucked it under his wing. “Yeah, whatever. Can’t I just-”

“No, you cannot just bust the clouds so you don’t get rained on.” Thunderlane quickly interrupted with a deep sigh. “The weather team is still getting on my case about last time. So an umbrella will have to do.”

Despite rolling his eyes in response, Rumble was unable to think of any arguments to his brother’s statement. He may have needed to protect himself from the rain, but that wasn’t any reason to set back hours of Weather Pony work in the process.

As fun as it may have been.

Pleased with himself for reigning in his little brother, even a little, Thunderlane gave a soft smile. “Well, have fun out there. Don’t get into any trouble or anything. I’m gonna go and take a huge nap, and hopefully I’ll wake up before dinner.”

With this, Thunderlane made his way back to the living room, flopping audibly onto the couch as he quickly fell into a deep slumber.

Lacking any adult supervision, Rumble quickly untucked the umbrella from his wing. Refusing to believe in the wisdom of his older, more mature brother, he leaned the umbrella against the wall and instead trusted that he surely wouldn’t need it for a little rainstorm. He was made of tougher stuff than Thunderlane took him for.

Without any further hesitation or interruption, the teenage stallion was finally able to open his front door and get on his way. His next stop: The Park.