• Published 22nd Aug 2020
  • 2,577 Views, 561 Comments

The Odd One - theOwtcast



Made a friend? Check. Gotten permission to move in with the ponies? Check. Lived happily ever after? Well, uh...

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Black Sheep

The rest of the lunch passed in uncomfortable silence. The ponies had finished their soup, moved on to the main dish, and started with a dessert, and not a single word had been uttered the whole time. Flurry had gotten another bowl of oatmeal and eaten it in low spirits and without the slightest sign of wanting to throw it in anyone’s face again. She’d hardly taken her eyes off me the whole time, and Shining had noticed and matched her wide-eyed gaze with a scowl of his own. Don’t get any funny ideas or they’ll be your last, it said. Not even Pharynx would have done a more intimidating job of it!

Berry had arrived twice more after the unfortunate incident with the first bowl of Flurry’s oatmeal. Both times she’d been as silent as the rest of us, having abandoned her previous jovial spirits since the interruption. She must have picked up on the overall mood and decided that too much cheer would only make things worse! Had she heard the commotion, too? Or was her sudden seriousness the result of having to tolerate a changeling at the dining table, whether or not he knew how to behave himself? She had been taken aback by the sight of me pretty much immediately, after all! Had I done something wrong in that first moment without realizing it? Said something I shouldn’t have? Looked at her wrong?

And who had cleaned up the thrown oatmeal while we were away? Berry, maybe? Or some other servant? That mess wouldn’t have won me any favors, either! I should have been the one to clean it up! It had been my fault; why would anypony be expected to clean up after me? I should have scrubbed the table and the floor and everything else twice as clean as soon as I’d returned! I had plenty of experience cleaning up the hive; this wouldn’t have been a problem at all, especially if the ponies would leave me alone while I worked, unlike a lot of drones who had often gone out of their way to make my job harder!

Yeah, about that. Should I have returned to lunch at all after what had happened? What right had I had to assume that I’d be welcome again after what I’d done? What had made me think that I would ever again be tolerated, let alone wanted in the Princess’ presence? I’d been so generously given a chance to explain myself and sort things out with Prince Shining, and I’d blown it! I’d blown it and made things even worse! How would he ever accept me now? How would Princess Cadance keep putting up with me much longer now that I’d proven myself to be an epic mess-up?

If only I could make it up to them somehow! But how?

The vase. I could try to fix the vase I’d broken! It wouldn’t look the same, but maybe they would take it as a sign of good will and consider showing me some mercy?

Except, knowing my luck, somepony had probably already found the vase fragments by now and fixed it themselves. Or thrown it away and put a new vase in the old one’s place instead.

The ponies finished their dessert and Berry showed up again to take the plates away. As soon as she left the room, I got up from my chair, cast a nervous glance at the Prince and Princess, hoping they would understand it as a request for permission to leave, and went to look for Berry.

I saw her go through another door and followed. The room turned out to be a kitchen, as I might have expected if I’d bothered to think, and my arrival startled the ponies working there, Berry included. Thankfully, nothing got broken this time!

“Can I help you?” Berry asked, eyeing me curiously.

“Oh, um, I… sorry to bother you… I just thought… you seemed annoyed with me earlier, and I wanted to apologize if I offended you… though I’m not really sure what I said… but anyway, I’m sorry…”

She tilted her head.

“What are you talking about?”

“You know, back at lunch, when you offered to bring a plate for me…”

She kept staring at me as if I were talking utter nonsense. I probably was talking nonsense! Why had I even come here?

“Uh, never mind… sorry to bother you…” I said, backtracking through the door that I’d absent-mindedly left open earlier. “Um, sorry.”

I closed the door, tried to turn around, and bumped right into Shining Armor. Startled, I yelped and fell on my rump before I even managed to consciously register his persistent scowl.

“What were you doing in the kitchen?” he demanded.

I flinched and let out a whimper. Oh dear… I’m not allowed in there, am I? What’s the punishment for trespassing?

For once, he decided to ignore my transgression, and simply let out an exasperated sigh.

“Nevermind,” he groaned. “Look. Cadance obviously isn’t going to throw you out, so if you want to stay here without becoming an ugly stain on a wall, I suggest you start behaving yourself! First of all: no hissing, growling, or any other aggressive behavior at all, and that especially includes draining ponies! I see you doing any of that or get word that you did it, I’ll blast you back into that cell, and I promise you that my magic is strong enough to crash you through every wall between here and there! Do you understand?

I nodded. I believed him!

“Second, stay away from my daughter! If you pass by her in a hallway, I suppose that’s unavoidable, but that’s as considerate as I’m willing to get! Touch her and I’ll personally break your legs! Is that clear?”

I nodded again.

“Third, you can forget shapeshifting unless somepony sees what you turn into! I want to be able to keep track of you at all times!”

Nod.

“Fourth, I’m assigning a guard to keep an eye on you at all times. Wherever you go, the guard follows. Whatever you do, the guard is there to witness it and to stop you if you try anything you shouldn’t, and don’t even think of trying to lose them by shapeshifting! I trained them personally and know what they’re capable of, so I suggest that you don’t push your luck if you want to see another day!”

“How is that better than throwing him in the dungeons?” Cadance interjected. How long had she and Sunburst been there? I hadn’t noticed them! “I thought we agreed to stop treating him like a mortal enemy!”

“I know, Cady, but we can’t throw precaution into the wind! You know too well what his kind is capable of - what he is capable of!”

“Yes, dear, but I also know that he’s trying to leave that behind him and prove himself trustworthy! How is he supposed to do that when you won’t allow him?”

“I’ll see what he’s trying to do!” He turned to a guard standing a little further down the hallway. “Trusty Shield! Get over here!”

Trusty Shield did as instructed and saluted.

“You know your orders, soldier,” Shining said to him. “Any questions?”

“No, Sir!”

“Good! I need to get back to my duties, this has been a big enough delay already. Don’t leave his side!” He marched away.

I watched him go until he turned around a corner, then sighed and got up. I wanted to apologize to the Princess for being such a burden, but she spoke first.

“I’m sorry for all of this,” she said to me. “I was really hoping he’d be willing to listen to reason by now!”

“No, I’m sorry, Princess! It’s my fault! I shouldn’t have hissed when that bowl of oatmeal hit me! I should have controlled myself!”

“How?” Sunburst asked. “That thing is insanely hot, and I know it from personal experience!”

I looked away.

“I know probably every kind of pain from personal experience,” I sighed. “Chrysalis can get… creative. You’d think I would have learned to brace myself for whatever is coming years ago! Maybe I’ve just been away from her too long… allowed myself to forget…”

“And that’s a good thing, right?” Sunburst replied. “That you’ve been away from her long enough to forget the pain, I mean.”

“I want to agree with you, but how is that going to help me if I can’t control my outbursts when something happens?”

“The ‘outbursts’, as you call them, are normal responses to pain, and nopony in their right mind would expect you to control them! You’re a living being, not a machine!”

“Even if it looks threatening?”

Cadance nodded.

“Even if it looks threatening at first glance. But we should learn to recognize whether something is a threat or simply an instinctive response to things like pain, not expect you to endure something we wouldn’t!”

I wanted to say something, but couldn’t think of an appropriate reply. I was torn between expressing my gratitude for her efforts and reiterating my inferiority, but she spoke first again.

“Anyway, your room is ready. I was going to tell you sooner, but…” She shrugged. “Let me take you there!”

“Uh, Princess,” Sunburst interjected, “may I do it? If you don’t mind, that is.”

“Sure,” she smiled. “I’ll take Flurry with me, then. Have fun!”

She took Flurry’s basket from Sunburst and left.

“This way,” Sunburst told me, and waited for me to get closer so we would walk side-by-side rather than him leading the way as I’d expected.

“Thank you for doing this. Uh, I hope it won’t get you in trouble?”

“Why would I get in trouble?” He sounded amused by the idea.

“For abandoning your post with Flurry in order to…” What would be a suitable way to describe it? “...associate yourself with an interloper? Is that how ponies say-”

He stopped in his tracks and stared at me.

“Interloper… what?” He blinked a few times and adjusted his glasses. “Thorax, you’re not an interloper! Okay, your arrival here was unexpected, no point denying it, but the misunderstanding about your intentions got resolved, even if some ponies find it hard to accept that, and you have as much right to be here as the rest of us! Also, Cadance didn’t mind my wish to hang out with you. She isn’t a tyrant, in case you haven’t noticed.”

“What about your duties to Flurry?”

“I’m her crystaller. My role with her is mostly ceremonial, and I do take it seriously, but I’m not required to be with her at all times, and I do enjoy foalsitting her but am not obliged to foalsit simply by virtue of being her crystaller. I took that responsibility willingly. I can come and go as I please, and there are plenty of ponies in the castle who can take care of Flurry if neither I nor her parents are available at any given moment, or even if I decide at any point that I don’t want to foalsit her anymore.”

“So your decision to show me where my room is won’t be frowned upon? Not even at a later time?”

“Of course not! And I want to get to know you better. That’s the main reason why I asked. Trusty Shield could have easily taken you to your room if that was our only concern.”

I glanced at the guard following us.

“Oh.” I debated with myself whether or not to make a request. Would Sunburst mind? I didn’t want to pester him any more than was unavoidable! In the end I decided to give it a try. “Sunburst, I hope it wouldn’t be too much trouble…”

“Yes?”

“I was wondering… you know that vase I pretended to be today?”

“Sure, what about it?”

“I don’t know if you noticed, but there was an actual vase there, and I accidentally broke it while running from Shining Armor.” I cast a quick glance at Trusty Shield again, expecting to see him prepare to strike me - or to feel the impact of his hoof against my face immediately - but he showed no signs of interest in our conversation, though I was sure he’d been listening carefully to every word. “I was hoping to collect the fragments and fix the vase if I can. I mean, you don’t have to, I can try to find it later on my own… unless it’s in a restricted area…”

He considered this for a moment.

“Well… yeah, sure, I can take you there, it’s actually pretty close… but I’m pretty sure somepony would have found those fragments and thrown them away by now. I don’t want to disappoint you-”

“No, don’t worry, it’s fine! I understand! It’s just… I can at least try…”

He nodded.

We walked through a few more hallways until we finally reached what I recognized as the place where the vase had been. We both looked around for the fragments, but as I’d feared, Sunburst’s expectations had proven correct. The fragments were nowhere to be found, and Trusty Shield looked like he wanted to ask us both why we were even bothering. If this were the hive and if he were a changeling, he would have undoubtedly asked it ten times already, maybe even punched us a few times for good measure; but as it was, he hadn’t said a single word the entire time. Was this how pony soldiers displayed discipline? Or was he merely waiting for Sunburst to leave so he could assert his dominance over me undisturbed?

Eventually I agreed to give up the search and be taken to my room. It was several floors up, probably somewhere near Spike’s guest room. I hadn’t bothered to count the floors before, and the hallways all looked so similar! Wouldn’t I get lost here on my own?

You’re not alone, Thorax, I reminded myself. A guard will be with you wherever you go and whatever you do!

I made a decision to do my best to not get lost anyway, whether or not a guard could direct me if necessary. I didn’t want to find out what kind of punishment I’d get for getting lost!

“Here we are,” Sunburst stopped at a door at last, then opened it and stood aside to let me in. “It’s not much, but most of the other rooms are already occupied, and you can bring in whatever you need and decorate any way you want. Oh, and the bathroom is right across the hallway.”

I looked around. Though not nearly as big as Spike’s room, this one was still much bigger than the sleeping burrow Pharynx and I had shared in the hive. A window provided natural light and promised a view to the outside world; I’d never had that before! The furniture was sparse - a single bed, a cupboard, and a small table - but the room was clean and actually looked really nice, even if pretty bare compared to the rest of the castle.

“Do you like it?” Sunburst asked.

“It’s wonderful! Thank you so much, and thanks to Princess Cadance… and Shining Armor, too? Did he allow this?”

“Reluctantly, but yeah, I guess. Cadance pretty much didn’t leave him a choice.”

“So, who’s my roommate?”

“Huh?” He stared at me blankly again for a moment, then facehoofed. “Right, Spike mentioned it! Listen carefully, Thorax: this is your bed, and you’re going to sleep in it! No sleeping on the floor or Cadance and I will be very disappointed in you, and Spike will be downright offended!”

“What idiots sleep on the floor?!” Trusty Shield’s question startled us both; we hadn’t noticed him come in!

“Can’t you at least leave him alone in his own room?” Sunburst protested.

“My orders are to never leave him out of my sight,” he stated.

“What about privacy? Ever heard of that?”

“I’ve got orders.”

“Are you going to follow him into the bathtub too?”

“Orders,” Trusty Shield shrugged. “And I agree with Captain Shining. No point in playing nice with these pests.”

“I’ll have a word with Cadance about this…” Sunburst muttered.

I wasn’t listening anymore. I’d approached the window and was looking through it now, looking at the city streets below me but not really seeing any of it. For all of Sunburst’s reassurances so far and the marginal comfort they’d brought me, Trusty Shield’s few words had hit a nerve and crumbled what little optimism I’d managed to gather up.

An idiot and a pest. That was how Trusty Shield saw me: a strange, unwanted, annoying idiot with suspicious motives who couldn’t even be trusted to take a bath unsupervised. Was that how everypony else saw me, even if they were too polite to say it out loud? Was I destined to remain an enemy and an untrustworthy idiot in their eyes? What would I have to do to convince them otherwise? What wouldn’t I have to do? How far would I have to go, how much effort would I have to put in to make them give me the slightest benefit of the doubt? Was it even possible?

“Thorax?” Sunburst touched my shoulder.

“I don’t belong here, Sunburst,” I whispered, trying to hold back tears. “I should have never come here… I should have stayed in the hive and endured the constant torture and bullying until one of them killed me… I’m worthless either way…”

“Thorax…”

“I thought I could make friends here… but the ponies don’t want me anywhere near them… and I can’t blame them… how could they accept an awkward, worthless idiot that I am?... How could anyone?... Not even my own kind… how can I expect them to want me around if I don’t know the first thing about fitting in? The more I try-”

“Thorax, snap out of it!” He grabbed me by both shoulders and shook me a little. “What’s gotten into you? Don’t listen to that guy! You’re not worthless, you’re not an idiot, and you deserve better! Okay, so you have a hard time fitting in, but that’s to be expected considering how different our cultures are! At least I got the impression that they’re different… you would know that better than me… But that’s not the end of the world! I can teach you about pony society and help you overcome these differences!”

“I can’t ask that of you… It would take forever, and I’m not worthy…”

“Are you even listening? You are worthy, you do deserve a chance to prove yourself honorable, and you do deserve friendship! I will not have you deny it! And I want to help you get there!”

“But your duties…”

“Nevermind my duties! Cadance will understand! In fact, she’s trying to do the same thing!”

“I don’t know, Sunburst…”

“Listen here, Thorax!” He took my head in his hooves and got in my face. “You need help, and we want to give it to you! That’s what friends do! You came here looking for friendship, right? Well you have it! So why are you resisting it now?”

“I don’t know how to repay you,” I sighed.

“And you don’t have to,” he said. “True friendship doesn’t know debts and repayment; it’s just being there for one another. And we’re here for you now. Please, Thorax! You can’t go on like this much longer! Please, let us help you!”

The brutal sincerity in his words and eyes and the strength of his love aura tore down all remaining resistance in me. It was true; I had sought friendship, and if this wasn’t it, I didn’t know what was!

Sobbing openly now, I surrendered myself into Sunburst’s comforting hug.