A long forgotten element has been brought back, but for better or for worse?
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YAY!
Chrysalis? What is she doing here?
On a side note, this is no Shadow Veil, as I originally thought. This is definitely some sort of high level Shade-class magic. I've never seen a spell quite like this before, though. I'll get Baron, Pittoo, and Krystal on it. With luck, I might find something.
I'll get right on it!
"Don't call me that! And sure, I'll help."
Alright, a mystery! Let's get to work!
Of course chrysalis wants him to survive....
Damn i like this story
MOAR
Stop assuming the worst of Earth. People thought the world was gonna blow up during the Cuban missile crisis and it didn't happen. Intellectuals tore their hair out over overpopulation destroying the world in the 17th century. Didn't happen. Hell, the band Bad Religion's most well known song is "Ten in 2010", in which they bought into the idea that we'd have ten billion people on Earth by 2010.
Nope! Didn't happen. So all that tearing of hair proved wrong. So your assumptions are probably not gonna happen EITHER. Quit throwing the Earth under the bus, for Christ's sake!
Everyones played right into Discord The Jokers paws.
Wonder how long before Twilight realises as other objects undergo hallucinogenic transformatons that have no physical, medical or magical explanation.
Geez what the hell is going on with james?!
I see what you did there. Can't even pick up an item in a shop to test its heft or give it a few practice swings without getting the guard trying to kill you for shoplifting.
5671469 I see the Fallout reference was wasted on you.
And saying a nuclear Armageddon is never going to happen is like saying you're never going to be in an automobile accident. The threat is always there and has been there since before the Cuban Missile Crisis. And it's still there. And with psychos like North Korea being in possession of nuclear weapons, you have to wonder how long the world has before someone presses the button.
Nuclear apocalypses are not a fantasy. It is the single most likely way that this world will be laid to waste in the future. The fact that it is so likely to happen is part of what makes it such a popular topic to explore in fiction. It hasn't happened yet, but it most certainly can happen. And if you still claim it will never happen, then you are one hell of an optimist.
And if you're going to moan every time I decide to speak without any reservations about the deteriorating state of this world, I have one word of advice for you.
Leave.
I can promise you that you will not be pleased with where this story is going. The fourth volume will delve heavily into the sins of this world and it's contrast to the likes of Equestria. If you don't like how this story has been so far, you better abandon ship now because I can assure you that you will hate the rest of the ride. I won't stop you from sticking around if you're a glutton for punishment, but I still must insist that you leave because the parts that you hate about this story is not going to change to please you no matter how badly you want them to.
Seriously though, I don't know why you keep coming back and more or less repeating yourself with every 'review'. When I've commented on stories I hate, like Rainbow Factory and the like, I said my peace once and never went back. Why do you keep complaining about the exact same thing every time? Hoping that I'll suddenly start writing this story the way you'd rather have it and it's characters go?
Awesome chapter very emotional like all the others it is fantastic and I can already see hints to what may link to james problems I really enjoyed it and I hope it will soon come back to normal like in the beginning of the series. I really enjoyed this chapter and all of it's elements for the story of some happiness and sadness. Awesome chapter and I look forward to the next one
I really like this story but sometimes it hard to get past the character's dismal view of Earth and it's people. I know he brings up some points but Humanity is not good or bad, it's in the grey with us shifting sides at the turn of a coin or a single powerful person. You cannot fault Humans for the actions of a tyrant, madman, criminal or dictator, you have to also look at our accomplishments and good actions that more than balance out what occurs either now or later.
That's not always the case but sure, let's role with that
Great job again, Humanity.
However, as much as I'm aware of your clear distaste for the human race, I need to bring up something I think you need to understand. "A day that will happen?" "Killing for fun?" "The humans will become extinct?" I knew you despise the human race, but jeez... you sound like you hate being human.
I'm sorry to drag you into this again, but please bear with me. There was someone from a fictional universe that once said, "Every sentient being deserves a chance for redemption." That one fictional character has no hatred for any race. He does not allow the actions of one individual to judge the entire race. He cares for everyone but himself. He never gloats, he never attacks unless provoked, and he never allows his race's mistakes to turn them into who they oppose. The safety of all sentient creatures always becomes his top priority, especially against the forces that only wishes to destroy them. Even when he lost his home to war, he never allowed that to change his desire and passion to end the war through any means. Even when those he considered brothers seemed beyond redemption, he always held on to what little hope he had left that they can do the right thing. Until the day comes to when he has to kill them, he kept exhausting options in the hopes of avoiding the final choice. When he was bestowed upon him wisdom of the ancients, he humbled it and carried it into the depths of war that killed his world. And I do know you don't like them, let alone, have an interest in them. But out of them all, I found one of them that I can admire and respect without shame. A giant metal soldier with wisdom who cares only for righteous freedom and blind justice for all sentient beings, and will not hesitate to kill anyone who wants to destroy that freedom. This giant, fictional metal titan of a war veteran with millions of years of wisdom being carried by him that even I would dare say that the fictional, wise and humble alicorn, Princess Celestia would admire. His name is Optimus Prime.
I know you may not see him like I do. But he is the type of inspiration that I think people need today... a fictional character that is the type of person we need for the people to realise who we are is reality slapping you so hard across the face that even the devil would laugh at our misery.
5671908
And what of EQUESTRIA'S sins? It too has a history with bigotry, slavery, famine, disease and natural disasters. But it dealt with those more easily because a third of its population could fly, another third had super strength, and another third had magic! MAGIC.
Humans never had any of that, we had to FIGHT to survive, there's no animals giving us flowers like in the forests of Ponyville or all powerful "good witch Glinda" types to watch over us! It's like comparing the struggles of someone who broke their leg reintegrating into society vs someone who had both of their legs blown off. One person had to work harder, so their success means more because they STRUGGLED more! Ponies by comparison gave it easy! I'm sure you'd think Equestria was a cesspool if you compared it to the CARE BEAR world! But you're putting unrealistic expectations of utopia on Earth and going "bad fifties alien movie passing judgment on humanity". It's as bad as anything the Conversion Bureau delivered.
And BTW? Mass Effect is better than Fallout.
Humanity, I think our opinion on the Human race is the same.
Everyday, I go through hardships that make me lose hope in the human race. Their independence is destroying them. They're slowly causing the world to go into another epidemic. I believe that we're not as peaceful as Equestria because of religion. Without Christianity, there would be no wars, no conflict, no sin and no need for salvation. The world would have been a better place.
There never was any meaning to life! What we have is what we get! That is all! Nothing more!
By the way, still loving the story!
5673744 I find it funny how so many are commenting on that philosophy instead of the chapter itself.
5673087 You don't have to worry about dragging me into this again. Seems several others just can't help themselves to beating you to it.
...Was that first world Fallout? Borderlands? The second was no duh, Skyrim, but we were never told of the first.
5674144 Fallout. The scorpion was an Albino Radscorpion and the robot was a Sentrybot.
5674124 I know, but whenever you put something in the story that insults humankind, it kinda hurts my faith in the human race, considering the fact there's still good people out there. But knowing you are tired of being dragged into the topic over a million times, I feel bad.
And I know you don't like Transformers. But one of the characters, Optimus Prime, he's practically my idol. I practically symbolize him as the symbol of Leadership. Humble, noble, just, wise, courageous, righteous, and selfless. He's a real body of a true leader and a true patriot. That's why I brought him up in my comment. You have no idea how much I think he's the true color of America, and the perfect representation of America. What's ironic was that he was created in Japan, and he's a walking wall of freedom with a true passion for absolute freedom to choose for all living creatures.
But then there's the tyrant behind the war... Megatron. He's a complete polar opposite to Optimus Prime. He's the walking definition of evil, no, the walker of evil. Scratch that, he is the body of evil. That's why I love Transformers. Because it's a constant reminder of why wrong is never right. Why force is never righteous. Why tyranny only inspires fear instead of peace.
Transformers to me is the war between true freedom and true tyranny.
5674171 Ah. Thanks for clearing that up.
5674124
I find it interesting you find it more wrong for people to criticize the main character, the author avatar, for his misanthropic views on humanity than thinking it's wrong to be having those views. It's like somebody who talks about "legitimate rape" being surprised people are calling him out over his comments. If you don't want people to criticize your views, then stop injecting them into the story. All it is is standing on your soapbox at best and preaching/prosletyizing a cold, cruel, misanthropic viewpoint at worst. It drags the story down, makes the character look unfeeling, cruel and dickish towards his own race, and it's its completely unnecessary to the story. Not to mention an example of hypocrisy, since EQUESTRIA, as I and others have pointed out, has TONS of problems of its own, yet you idealize it, and demonize Earth, brushing away all of Equestria's problems and cherry picking the worst of Earth, ignoring that the bad elements of earth are the exception, not the rule.
5674282 I do have something I could say in response to that, but seeing as how this entire topic is a dead horse that some just can't stop themselves from beating, I'm just going to stay silent.
5674432 God, I'm sick of you. You know what? I've had enough. Whenever you comment on something in this story, it's the exact same damn thing. The one thing you always have a problem with, never the story's plot or quality itself. No matter how frequent or infrequently you speak up, it's the exact same complaint. Shut up. The first time was enough.
And Equestria has a fairly large number of problems?
Well, no bucking shit, Sherlock.
You think I don't know? I've pointed it out time and again, not to mention the show has as well, that Equestria does have problems. It has been stated time and again that Equestria is not a utopia. But you know what? Even by comparison, Equestria is far better than Earth has ever been. It's like saying one guy has a common cold, but the other guy has AIDS and several forms of cancer. The problems you've mentioned are not nearly as widespread and enduring and more often than not are a result of general bad apples in the bunch. Although Canterlot is a bit of an exception, but that's a common result of becoming extremely wealthy and is not unique to just Equestria. Ever hear of affluence? You can't expect everyone, even in a veritable paradise like Equestria, be perfect. Hell, no one is perfect. But as for the exception... I'm sorry to say that argument is flawed. You say that some of the things I criticized are exceptions to the norm. Well, let me explain something to you. When anything happens frequently or becomes common, that exception becomes a norm, because what is perceived as usual becomes the same as "normal". By contrast, something that becomes only temporarily common or frequent is a fad. For example, just because poverty isn't widespread in America doesn't mean it's not a norm in many places in Africa. Poverty is a norm of Earth, among other things.
In Equestria, things like that tend to not apply for very long thanks to the centuries of ruling experience under the royal sisters. It is very clear they try their best to resolve serous situations and their rule is quite widespread and absolute. Their guidance is more than likely the reason why Equestria has fared so well. And yeah, perhaps people in this world have had to struggle to succeed at times to the point where it seems Equestria has it easy. But you want to know what made the world so unforgiving and unsympathetic? Look in the mirror. The world is only as cruel as the people who run it. It might be different if the world was just downright inhospitable, but that is not the case. This is Earth, not SR-388. You also want to know what isn't a norm though? Villains. With the possible exception of Discord and Chrysalis being an unusual case, every major crisis has been resolved swiftly and effectively by one or more of the two royal sisters. (The events of Season 3 and onward I do not count for clear reasons) Nightmare Moon was not free to run amok for a full night and Sombra did not seem to have control over his slave empire for that long before Celestia and Luna intervened. Where in our world you have crap like the genocide in Sudan, the psychotic dictatorship of North Korea, and the Mexican drug cartels still going on years after they first began while the likes of the United Nations do next to nothing if not nothing at all to stop them. You think that, given what we've seen in the show, that Celestia and Luna would just sit around and do nothing if they had any say in these events?
I really hate resorting to this, but I'm officially done with you. I don't let varying ideologies blind me. I see the world for what it really is, no matter how sad the truth may be. If you comment on anything else on future chapters, it'll always be about the same thing you've complained about before. I get that your views on this are rather radical and stalwart and that you won't dare listen to anyone else, and that's fine. But I'm not putting up with this any longer. You don't like this story or how I think or my perceptions of the world? Go read a story you actually like. There's no logic or sense in coming back to read a story you hate.
By the way, I saw your blog, asshole. You just can't let anything go when it doesn't go your way, can you? Although I have looked through your other blogs and I have to say you really do seem like a nice guy and your heart is definitely in the right place. I certainly agree with most if not all of your claims. However, you need to learn to tell the difference between straight up misanthropy and just being honest and straightforward without any shred of humor about the state of this world and humanity. Calling it wrong and insulting another author in a public journal actually puts you in the wrong when it is uncalled for.
very well written (as always) and it seems that I was partially right last time, it was indeed his heart that was the problem, however, I was wrong on the point saying it was broken, as you've shown, it's merely shrouded. and Chrissi trying to help? I know that she's been around for a while and silently watching James for a good while now, but I still have to wonder when she'll properly introduce herself or get caught out. Any-who, I will be patiently awaiting the next chapter good sir, till next time.
Can't we all just let this guy write his goddamn story without trying to nitpick at his views?
Also, another great chapter. I'm still thinking its the Nightmare parasite.
5677352 Too bloody true! LEAVE HIM ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why do I get that feeling that the only way to save James is by completing the room with objects symbolic to each element, from each of the mane six at least? This chapter was great just as all the others and particularly loved the skyrim setting. As usual, I highly anticipate the next chapter.
5679305 Aside from the Skyrim segment, may I ask what stood out most in this one?
5680241 what stood out to me the most is that james's emotions are still decaying despite his mental condition remaining mostly untouched. One of the hallmarks of emotional decay is the person loses the ability to connect rational though to an emotional response. This results in an empty disposition wherein the person slowly ceases reacting to stimuli. This is of course not always the case as any individual is fully capable of removing emotional influence from their thought processes, but the panic attacks and overall disposition of James is such that he has in fact not undergone this process.
Now then, what this situation is indicative of is akin to a form of poison. A sort of poison that corrupts and undermines a person's emotional equilibrium, a poison that reacts violently to the presence of that which it works to destroy. in short, i'm calling it now; eating discord gave James chaos poisoning and now it's suppressing and interfering with his harmonic energies, more commonly known as emotions.
5680241 Might have been just James' personal feelings and reactions to each gift from the mane six that 'betrayed' him. I feel like the way he might rid of this poison is to find some way to realize that he truly loves each of them as so much more than friends but as the ponies that created his new life in Equestria and helped him become who he was before Discord happened.
ok I have hade a idea in the back of my mind for a wile now about who the Villon is and now after seeing cadence and Chrysalis fail now I am sure I am right.
but I am not going to say.
if I remember the author told me about this a wile back. still not saying.^_^ I pinky promised sorry all.
Harts Fire
5692487 Yeah, I have to apologize for that. The earliest chapters in this story were written back when I was new to the fandom and new to writing from a first person perspective. That whole scene was inspired during a trip to my first girlfriend's home (A waste of time and money) and I passed the time at one point by watching Over the Hedge for the first time. And if you've seen that movie, you know the rest.
I'll have to edit that scene to make certain the boomerangs are mere recreational items. Maybe made out of firm yet soft foam. There has always been kid-friendly boomerangs too. Thanks for pointing that out.
5621862 Actually, I have one last thing to say to you regarding your comments. And it's not directed to just you, but to every other dipshit on this site and beyond whose favorite word is "misanthrope".
We all know what misanthropy is, so I'm not going out of my way to post it here. But let me ask you this. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you see or hear the word "misanthrope"?
For me, it is the late George Carlin. He was especially well known for his misanthropy. But it seems that no one holds that against him because he was a comedian who made people laugh. You know what that means, right? That's the same as saying that you can be a neo-nazi, Islamic extremist, pedophile, or any other social degenerate, but no one will begrudge you for your toxic beliefs or interests so long as you express them in a way that is funny. So, people like that are OK while those who have genuine grievances about the state of the world and humanity's ever increasing missteps and address them with a straight face (which to be fair, they are topics that should not be joked about) are treated like pariahs and ostracized?
Dude, bite me. No, seriously. Bite my shiny "misanthropic" ass. This double-standard bias absolutely sickens me. Misanthropes generally are not afraid to admit hating their own kind. So when someone denies being a misanthrope, you may as well shut up because you have no means to prove it. And when someone actually does call out this world for what's gone wrong with it, you may as well grin and bear it because that is the sad truth. The world is getting worse and that's a fact, not an opinion. As a modern internet critic once said - "There is more shit in the world than gems."
Don't like it when people call out the world for what it is and what the homo sapien master race are responsible for? Take a look at the votes your comments above have received while you made a fool of yourself. I said it once and I'll say it again. Cry me a river.
As for every other biased fool who can't tell the difference between misanthropy and genuine disgust and criticism, I have two words.
Suck it.
This goes into the favorites shelf.
Things just got interesting again what with Chrysalis getting involved.
Also, love how discord was solid evil in this fiction. I hate how he became good in the series just because he was funny.
5705690 Discord becoming a good guy never felt right. He always seemed like he'd be suited as a neutral force at best.
I'm guessing the curse is from the parts of Discord he ate. Maybe The Doctor visits him and finds the source? I really can't wait to see how this plays out! Well done!
5706700 MORE PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSE!
5718634 Man, it has been a while since I last received such a comment on that chapter. It is appreciated.
If I may ask, what segments left the strongest impressions for you? Seems like this one coaxed quite a few emotions out of you.
5719259
The strongest?
Eating parts of discord was strong, but the ending...him "dieing" and rainbow trying to keep him awake. I had tears FLOWING. Again, I have never had tears flow before except by pain when I was 11 years old when I fell off a tall bed and bashed my head on a table leg...11 staples...
11 years of no tears...and your story broke that...keep it up.
Also...that changeling (I'm betting chrysalis, but no name? I can't say it is...YET!!!) trying to help was a shocker.
Also, it's just a huge thought, but I am betting discord is inside James. Or his power anyway...and because chaos magic is INSIDE him the residual magic from discords attempts to corrupt hit him which explains his lack and fluctuation of feelings.
And the deterioration is caused by the bits of chaos magic had a poisoning effect to him making his body slowly shut down. With discord being the only one who UNDERSTOOD chaos magic even a LITTLE, they can't sense it.
Just my little theory
Add to tracking and fav
Just offering, but if you need help (or more help) I will gladly help an awesome story like this.
On Hiatus? :(
I have to say Humanity you have made me cry almost 4-5 times with this story.
Not that that's a bad thing I hope you get the next chapter out soon I love this story it has the feels the happiness and also the awesomeness I hope you have a good day.
5725950 That many times? Wow. What parts brought the tears?
5726114 Well in the maze when he was being held by rd. Also when he saw the card about fluttershy and almost died and also alot more times.
5726114 Oh and by the way fabulous job
5722497
You'd think they'd have considered that possibility and would have brought the EoH to bear by now, even if they had to hit him while he's sleeping.
I'm thinking it's a freaking Nightmare trying to get him to surrender. Constantly assaulting him with horrible memories, messing with his dreams, changing how he perceives certain things...
I'm extremely tempted to call out 'Tantabus', but seeing as that didn't exist before these chapters, I have a really strong feeling it isn't.
Anyways, great chapter, as always, made me have the feels again, which I, again, never have while reading. Since I've basically repeated this over and over again in the past 5 chapters or so, I'll make a list of the points that disturbed me the most, made me have the feels the most and had me stop reading for a bit to get my thoughts and feels in order. (thought I'd make a spoiler of it all, just to be sure y'know?)
1. The Mane 6 corruption, (Pinpoint: Fluttershy encounter.)
This made me just, man, this was so strong. As having felt the feeling of betrayal before, this is very strong, and I know that what points this can pull humans. They're fragile and really do rely on trust, some more than others. This even made me feel a sting in my heart, instead of just imagining the pain James was going through. And damn, Fluttershy forcing him to draw blood from his own neck? That surely isn't gonna leave a scar now, is it? ._.
2. The fight with Discord (Pinpoint: Eating limbs, taunting a helpless Discord.)
This was just so detailed and gruesome I could almost imagine the scene playing right before my eyes. It was disturbing that James would do such a thing, but logical considering the human nature. The eating the limbs almost made me gag, and that taunting... man James scare me to hell. Never knew you were able to write in such a dark manner.
Btw, smart play on James' part. Tempting Discord to remove his immortality.
3. James 'dying'. (Pinpoint: Drawing Cutiemarks, blacking out before Rainbow Dash.)
After such a struggle and still holding those dear to you close to your heart is just... strength. I do not know anyone who would still be able to hold them so close to their heart after such betrayal. Having stood next to one I held, and still hold, really close to my heart, I felts what Rainbow must've felt, and it's serious pain, and quite unexplainable. You have to have experienced it to understand it.
4. James' dream. (Pinpoint: Ending)
Holy crap, what just happened? ._.
This was just... sensory overload. after this I just had to stop reading and go drink something to calm my mind. How emotionally painful that must've been... I can't even imagine. I could almost feel it.
Kinda sad that it isn't scientifically accurate, as you can only dream about things you have seen, so Gladesong wouldn't have been possible from a scientific standpoint, although I can overlook this because it could've been more sinister forces, the Equestrain Atmosphere or just some child he once saw running around and forgot about, then later imagined as his own child in his dream, but this is just me nitpicking, don't mind it too much.
5. The Mane 6 entering hospitalized James. (Pinpoint: 'Corrupted 4' walking in.)
Man... that reaction just... isn't natural. Here I started to really feel as if something bigger was behind this. Some evil force instead of just haunting memories. And then suddenly him blacking out... man, you got me scared over his death there...
6. James' impending death?
Man, only 2 weeks to live? It's a shock to anyone who get that message about anyone they hold dear. Soul shattering even (again, been there before, sadly enough). This really to me aback, because I've developed quite a bond with James, for as far as that's possible with a fictional character.
7. Fluttershy's card
Man, making something like that play in front of the kids... I couldn't help but not worry about James alone, but about the mental well-being of the kids either. Such a thing would really have a massive impact on them, especially seeing as how young they are, and how close they are to James. I can only imagine what James and the CMC felt.
8. Fluttershy's suicide attempt.
Man I know these kinds of things can have a giant impact, but Fluttershy suiciding? ._.
You really shocked me there.
Nothing more to say about it, really.
9. Chrysalis.
I was wondering when we'd see here again...
This is gonn be interesting, I can say that for sure. She trying to help James? That's something I never would've expected.
And probably some more I can't remember at this moment.
Shame to see Cadence couldn't do anything, but yeah, with such an evil force, I'd be surprised if it'd be solved that easily.
My theory about Chrysalis is that she wants to keep him alive since she's feeling off of his love.
Anyways, hope you like reading about me chattering about what points I liked in the story. You're doing a great you, please do keep it up. I'll be following this 'till it ends, which I hope will be a long time coming.
5674950
that cold analogy isn't very good...
Look, I can agree with some that the story has derailed... A lot...
That the music inserts are unnecessary in some cases...
That these resent views on humanity waver between slightly pessimistic, to just silly...
And that -and I'm sorry to to say this, -the author has been coming of as quite full of himself.
And this is all coming from a veteran of this fanfic; who arrived before the rescue Nightmare Moon; before the armor came into play; before James even got his cutie mark; I was there back when this was being posted on fanfiction.net and had at most 7 or 8 chapters.
I remember thinking about this story all through the day, waiting to get home to check for the next chapter.
But that's besides the point.
The point is while I do have problems with this, that can be descused through a calm, and civil set of PM's, or it can be done calmly out here. And I say that to the both of you.
Because while I hold no tolarence for this "no talking about the philosophy of a chapter" nonsense, I will have to say that bantering about these problems will fair you no better!
If you two still wish to ignore my words and keep arguing like an old married couple, you may. But for the good of both of you, leave the rest of us out of it unless we ask!
6342264
By all means you may have a debate here.
In fact I would be rather delighted to join you.
But let's keep it just that: "a debate"
And don't go blaming one-another since you both fall guilty!
Bloody hell, I feel like someone's mother