Bowstring and the Fantastical Fattening Farce

by MetalBrony20

Preface - The History of Equestria - Volume 4, Late Celestial Age to Diarchy Reborn

Abridged excerpt from - The History of Equestria, Volume 4, Late Celestial Age to the Diarchy Reborn.

Between the period of 164-162 BLR (Before Luna Return), Equestria began to face a growing crisis. Due to mounting issues with weather production, unstable solar output from unknown magical or astrological interference and a rampancy in plant related diseases appearing rapidly, it had led to sweeping crop failure across the land. No pony was safe from the shortage, save the most opulent and rich individuals, with either giant store houses and cellars, or simply able to buy the limited stock in bulk from with black market deals or simply muscling their way into the few productive farms, bribing them for the best quality food.

Depravity and hunger swept the land. Virtually all assets of Equestrian life came tumbling to a halt. Figure 37 is a period artwork from this time. The monotone colours, the vivid emotions displayed by the pony, expressing their anguish as a reflection on society as a whole. Violence and animosity grew into a raging inferno as the populace looked for somepony or something to place the blame upon. Some blamed Discord, who suspected his influence was leaking into the world as revenge for his imprisonment. Many blamed Nightmare Moon for the same reasons. Indeed, their anger was aimless, and fruitless, leading to destruction when riots flared up for any number of reasons.

Princess Celestia, as an act to restore normality, and free her ponies from the grip of crippling famine that hadn’t been seen since the original tribes had their squabbles over 2000 years prior, made a decree. Whoever could develop a solution to the nationwide famine, would be rewarded with riches and rewards beyond their wildest imagination. As long as it was proven to work and it could work for a long time, then they would receive the reward. Any cons artist or tricksters attempting to make profits from the crisis would be punished harshly.

And so, the hunt was on for a solution. Magical institutes and schools placed their bets upon the raw arcane world to provide their answer. Meanwhile, the developing chemical industry believed that chemistry and industrial might would be able to do the same work as complex spells, without the need for unicorn application. The groups toiled over many months, feverishly working towards the same goal, just in opposite manners. Indeed, they found solutions.

The professors and doctorate at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns created a new enchantment but found it could only affect a single organism at one time. The group was led by a stallion by the name Moirax Morag, an aspiring doctorate, who had a passion for flora. A team of Earth Ponies and Pegasi at MACI (Manehatten Agricultural Chemical Industries) developed what came to be known as fertiliser. Utilising Nitrogen fixation, it allowed production of ammonia, which provides essential nutrients for plants. This was headed by Grudge Haber, who drew up the blueprints for the original machine. The only issue with the fertiliser was that it only provided the nutrients but didn’t protect against harsh conditions.

If by chance, Haber and Morag met in a bar in Canterlot, both trying to drown their frustrations in expensive alcohol. Haber had just presented the current work to Celestia, much to her dismay, and decided to stay the night in the city before making the return trip. Overhearing the others drunken rants, the two began to discuss their findings. And out of their drunken minds, they found the solution the world over would thank them for. Using the fertiliser as a base, the two found that they could bind the Herbimancy spell to the ammonia. They had finally cracked it. After finalising the function in the school labs, they compiled their data. What they presented to Celestia, would shape the following centuries.

The tested plants were highly resistant to heat and cold, they could tolerate dry conditions and general climatic fluxes which would have crippled most conventional crops and stunted any harvest. However, the most impressive effect was on the growth of the plant. Rapid growth, now common in everything touched by the miracle solution, led to shorter and shorter growing seasons for the farmers, leading to them having exceedingly large amounts of stock. Soon, store houses were groaning with bumper crops that managed to spoil at a much slower rate.

As such, the markets had to adjust to the influx of food, cutting the prices of everything, from carrots, strawberries, apples as they flooded the market with all their excess produce. Wheat, oats and other grasses and grains too grew rapidly, with no disease at all. Ponies from all walks of life could afford to fill their houses with as much food as they wanted. In the span of just a week, the price of a loaf of bread went from 100 bits, to ¼ bits. The two were given royal honours, and enough money to finance the production and subsequent distribution of the magi-fertiliser nationwide.

And so, Morag-Haber became national heroes. Their product filled barns and sheds across the country and led to bumper crop after bumper crop. Food was so cheap that everypony ate more and more. As this rampant consumption increased, ponies noticed that they were looking rather rotund in comparison. At the time, not much was thought about it. Afterall, most creatures had been deathly thin only months prior, filling out wasn’t exactly a problem. However, this turned from just simply getting a little chubby, to a full-on trend of excess weight. Everyone was growing fat, but nopony cared too much.

Even once conditions returned to normal, there was no incentive to not use Moirag-Haber. And so, the cycle of excess growth, purchase and consumption continued, as it has done till this very day. Fat and obesity were, and still is, common. With no obvious changes to society since, it states to claim that this will continue into the foreseeable future. Coupled with automation and increasing technological and thaumilogical fidelity, projected average weight will continue to rise exponentially. See Figure 38. Ponies have theorised that sooner, rather than later, this tipping point will be reached, and weight will skyrocket across the country. When this occurs, will remain to be seen.