• Published 12th Aug 2020
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Colonel Hooves and the Empire of Crystal - KarmaSentinal



Idol Hooves is tasked with rebuilding the Crystal Guard.

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Chapter 7: Hearth’s Warming, the things you do for love. (Edits HorseWordFan)

Author's Note:

So the ending was rushed to get this out on time of course, but the opportunity to publish this was to much to pass up. Merry Christmas, and Happy holidays people!

Note: *Snowdrop is a fan creation of a blind pegasus that created the first snowflake and started the Hearth's Warming Tradition of pegasi dropping snowflake. She was also a friend of Luna's before her banishment.

Even under the magical effects of the Purity Dome, the chill of the blizzard outside managed to seep its way in. The air in Crystal City at best made one require a scarf, and at worst required additional gear knitted from wool to offset *Snowdrop’s work to comfortably move about the day. I myself, lacking the natural fur of ponies fell into the latter, choosing to wear a red beanie, matching scarf and accompanying booties to fight off the carapace aching cold- there’s a reason we prefer the heat of the badlands.

“Why did I have to come along? It’s cold!” My charge whined as we made another left, putting us on the road that would lead us to the city market.

“Because Topaz requires a break, and we figured the great outdoors would do you some good.”

I could hear her wings ‘buzzing’ at the answer, finding it lacking to explain why she was in the cold, so I elaborated further, hoping that by making our excursion more important Cersus will be more complacent.

“Topaz requires certain materials that are not important enough to bother the castle staff.” I could feel Cersus’s forehead wrinkling in thought as I lowered my head to avoid curious glances being sent my way.

I didn’t want to be recognized so quickly.

“Like what?” Cersus asked while running closer to my right side, forcing me to adjust where I placed my hooves to avoid hitting her.

“Along with some additional writing supplies, she wants chocolates..and honey for myself.”

“Wh…”

“And if your behavior is adequate we’ll find you something as well.” I promised as the influx of ponies funneling their way to the market began crowding us, forcing Cersus to walk just underneath my barrel to avoid getting trampled by the mass of ponies.

We stopped talking after that, the many conversations blending into a symphony of pitches and hoof gestures made the act of communication near impossible. I slowed my trot to not only allow Cersus a chance to keep up, but purchase some time in deciphering the directions I had been given; some ponies generously went around while others still sought to bump into me as they fought everypony else to get where they were going.

I picked a direction that looked promising, and resumed our quest for the items. The direction forced us further in the madding herd of haggling and loitering ponies, but it also had the most stores, and stalls making it the logical first stop.

We moved toward the street, my muffled steps lost in the sea of commerce as we passed our fist stall, the two crystal ponies angrily fighting back the flood of potential buyers knocking everything they touched over. They didn't have the time I needed, and continued our search when a building sign caught my attention.

Unlike the rest of the street, this sign made from crystal was lit up with magically infused connections that were shaped in a way to resemble the outline of a royal guard and a block. I was about to move past the oddity of a store when Cersus’s hooves pelted my forelegs seeking my attention, I should have ignored it.

“LET'S GO IN THERE! COME ON, COME ONE!” she begged, almost running out from underneath me and into the crowd before remembering all the ponies out and about.

“We’re not here for whatever that establishment has to offer, and the quicker we find what we need the sooner we can return.” her ears pinned back, and I thought that was the end of that until she looked up.

“Ba..ba..” she even deployed the quivering lip and single tear to embellish the act further, and while proud of her mastery of the tactic, I had to put a stop to it.

“Enough. That won’t work on me.”

“It was worth a shot.” she admitted before smiling “But I did just get a raise on my allowance…”

“Clever filly.” I admitted, feeling both ashamed and proud that she noticed there was no set date for her new allowance. She smiled at the praise, and I reluctantly followed the filly into the store.

By the sign up front, I should have known the kind of store and reason for Cersus’s desire to enter, but having never personally visited one, I didn’t catch it.

The toy store was crowded, with the show floor a single room with multiple shelves lining the very walls all the way to the window. Islands of isolated shelves littered the open floor, offering additional bounties to the foals running around unsupervised as their guardians conversed with each other by the windows or register.

Cersus and I parted ways the moment we entered with the filly bolting off toward the herd of giggling foals, with many of them being earth ponies, her wings earning immediate attention. Not wanting to be a hawk parent, I moved out of the way to browse the stores contents along the wall, finding them to bare more of the fragile and expensive items- crystal and tin figures being the common choice.

The owner had the store split into sections with colt and filly toys on the side I’m currently browsing, with the other side catering to newborns up to younger foals of four years of age. The center of the house turned business had a number of double sided shelves organized in rows of two, or four to allow potential customers a chance to browse the products without lingering too long at one spot. This set up, allowed others a chance to view the other products until their desired spot opened up, but these toys were more for the specialized market of older teens to adults. Shining and myself had frequented these sort of toy and figure displays in the past, and the urge to take a peak left me conflicted for a second before I shoved the thought aside to continue my window shopping in the colt section.

My desire to see what sort of releases I had missed during the last couple of years finally led me astray toward these shelves of wonder, and mystery. The giggling of foals as Cersus finished a tale reminded me to check up on her, and satisfied the filly wasn’t getting in trouble returned to browsing.

The shelf I stumbled upon appeared to be more figures, but with greater detail than their colt and filly counterparts to the point they seemed to serve the purpose of being displayed than actual play.

“No Spiders & Catacombs unfortunately.” I scanned the rest of the shelf space to confirm this was the case before repositioning myself in front of the shelf.

This one is fairly better in keeping my interest with its intriguing dedication to nothing but guard figures and other related toys. Many were of the smaller caliber meant to be cheap, and easily amassed for conflict simulations, but a smaller collection were composed of more lifelike figures in their design and functionality. Mostly of crystal just like the castle, these figures or statues, came fully geared for the scenario they each depicted with such detail the sculpture was either a guard or had been privileged to have been given a set.

The one drawing the entirety of my attention resembled a fellow guard I knew back in Canterlot, except the statue wasn’t a pegasus, but a crystal pony. His physique was slightly exaggerated (nearly identical to Bold’s) to allow more freedom of imagination, but everything else on the figure appeared properly scaled. The armor afficed to the base pony was classical by every sense of the word, fashioned with segments of overlapping plate to cover the back and legs with a single shaped piece to cover the neck. Looking closely, I could make out segments of scaled armor underneath the overlapping plate with a blanket being used to separate the two

Unfortunately, the statue was too small for me to properly note every detail, but what I could make out displayed a level of quality most toys lacked. I tried looking for a price, but when that failed I set the piece back and grabbed another, and another, and another before giving up my search for a price. Quality pieces like this would be marked, and more often than not be displayed on a higher shelf to reduce the chance of a younger foal knocking it over. Yet, these stood gallantly in the immediate threat of a ravenous herd of sugar loaded foals terrorizing the local establishment.

That reminded me…

Standing up once more, I found Cersus still with the group of foals laughing as they showed one another the toy that occupied their interest. Satisfied she wasn’t causing trouble, I returned to admiring the details on the figures before when firm hoofsteps approached me.

“Greetings sir.” I offered the stallion as he approached, catching him by surprise. He flinched, but fixed his composure and returned the greeting.

“Hello, Can I help you find anything?” A normal response. One I often turned down in favor of searching for the item myself, but remembering the figures fueled a compulsion to learn more about their placement on the shelf.

The stallion lacked the distinct shine of the crystal ponies, but made up for it glossy coat associated with immigrants to the city, marking him as Equestrian born. His narrow frame made it obvious he wasn’t a former guard to my disappointment, but it didn’t mean he lacked muscles than they were just leaner.

I gestured with a hoof toward the shelf, notably the space I was just admiring.

“What are they?” He followed my hoof and gasped slightly once he saw the crystalline statue.

“A good eye!” He claimed as he plucked the one next to it off the shelf to examine it. This one mimicking the design of a low ranking auxiliary given how little armor the pony wore in favor of padded coats, and thick blankets thrown over his back.

“I hope so, but why are they made of crystal when the rest of the store isn’t?”

“Oh that!” He waved the question of, and to my dismay appeared to have forgotten about the figure he was holding. I almost rushed forward in preparation to grab the statue should he drop it, and by Celestia’s Order he kept a hold of it. “They’re a tradition of the Crystal Ponies called Enshrining, the act of preserving.”

“Are you saying there’s a pony, or a breezy inside?” I took a step back in slight disgust at the idea of owning a… actually Topaz collects the corpses of insects often, even if it's for her profession.

The stallion almost dropped the statue that time but recovered and caught it before setting it back on the shelf.

“Sorry, sorry! I uh, oh Celestia.” He paused to collect himself, looking from the shelf to the foals giggling as they continued their exploration of the store. “I uh..I, wow that’s something.”

“That’s what enshrining means doesn't it?” I asked for clarification about this mysterious custom.

“That wasn’t my first guess when I first learned of it, but to each their own. No. It’s more like symbolizing a part of their history, preserving it for future generations. Take this guy here.”


He pointed toward the piece I had been admiring when he had first come over.

“See how more detailed he is when compared to the rest of his compatriots? He’s a Praetorian Guard. Like our Royal Guard, but directly serves the royal family and no pony else while this one next to it is a conscript. Each piece is meant to represent a specific profession, or other position of importance as a way to respect those that have occupied it.”

“Interesting. I had no idea The Empire honored their dead in such a way.” I felt his uneasiness before seeing it, and knew it was time to be going, but not without patronizing. “I will take that one.”

“The Praetorian? A favorite of The Empire.” He took my chosen figure, and headed toward the counter with me following behind.

The foals had remained largely on the left side of the store where the Equestrian toys were largely centered. Cersus wings still proved very popular among the crystal foals, and this popularity wasn’t wasted as she used the attention to spin tales about something as she went between each toy.

I might have chuckled if I wasn’t worried about being recognized in that moment, keeping my head angled down as a couple of the ponies on the floor have taken an interest in my area. The sales pony ignored this attention as he began taking down the price, and adjusting the inventory.

“You’re from Equestria right?” The green coated stallion asked as he wrapped the statue in a colorful tissue that resembled the Crystal Empire’s banner.

“I am. My family and myself had just recently moved for our jobs.” I admitted, leaving out the parade, and our occupation. He looked up once he finished securing my purchase in its protective wrapping to stare at me for a moment before nodding.

“Figured as much. You can tell who's a native and not by their reactions when they enter the store, most look like they’re seeing Princess Celestia herself raising the sun.”

“Did they not have toys to entertain themselves?” He nodded while pointing at my purchase.

“Shriners as they’re sometimes called, are their toys for the common pony. So to go from crystal to wood, magic, tin, plastic?”

“Would cause some excitement.” I answered as thought about the foals Cersus was currently leading around. The stallion nodded as he motioned to where they were gathered.
“I divided the store to reflect that, right being the traditional Empire with the left being Equestrian. Both sell, but the ‘new and foreign’ toys are proving the most popular, especially that Officer Friendly doll.” My ears wilted at that bit of knowledge.

“Really?” I feigned ignorance. The green stallion got excited as he began talking about the doll.

What he explained to me was the standard list of attributes many fans have made before for loving said character. The idea of a caricature of my image being appealing still strikes me as a misalignment of priorities, but I’m told the physical realization of a role model for the foals will provide longer lasting benefits than some camera shyness.

I still don’t like the way they put forth that argument, but unfortunately it was effective enough for me to give in for the foals. How popular the doll became was very unexpected.


“... new one will be a bigger hit!”

Catching that last part slapped me harder than Celestia telling me to take a day off.

“New one?” I was already hearing Discord’s laughter as I fought my rising trepidation.

“They finally announced a new character!” He leaned in further to avoid drawing unwanted attention. “And I got a promo doll.”

‘Oh no.’ I thought.

“A new character, and not a new variant of the original?” Oh Celestia, I hope he misspoke.

He had not.


We left the toy store a few minutes later, Cersus and myself a bit lighter as we continued our stroll down the street. The bag holding my purchase was floating next to me as Cersus ran forward to practice ‘fighting’ whatever baddies blacked her path, the new Daring Do hat and matching jacket looking a little too big for the nymph. Still, her fear of crowds was temporarily forgotten, and that was worth the spoiling.

This became our norm as we visited each store that might stock the needed items, and the compliments for Cersus kept coming. Many a mare oooh and aahhh at the nymph, as we ventured forth with a few of those being directed to me. The blatant outpouring of admiration, joy, and a mixture of other feelings often associated with single ponies viewing parents and foals out in public, twice I had informed two potential suitors that I was indeed locked down, sometimes literally.

Embarrassments, and blushing aside nothing of note happened for the rest of our shopping until the return trip back to the castle.

“POW! BAM! To Slow!” Cersus continued to make comments like that as we returned to the castle, creating a path as ponies moved to avoid ‘being hit’ by the adventuring filly.

“Ease up on the power there Cersus. You might strain yourself at this rate, and who would save the “Magnificent, and Extravagant Wonder Filly- Cersus?” She ended her battle that moment, trotting in thought before finishing the fight.

“I’m awesome! No creature can stop me from saving the day!” She emphasized this by throwing another punch this way and that. I held my tongue, and allowed her to carry on uninterrupted.

The snow had stopped while we were in the store, but it left enough on the ground for ponies to create a plethora of intersecting trails going every direction. The only untouched snow became the dozens of islands left unmolested between these trails and the very rooftops, and nopony seemed to care as they hurried along to wherever they were going.

Some of these buildings had Hearth's Warming decor strung along from each roof end, with most having some variation of wreath on the door, and a thought crossed my mind.

“This is your first Hearth’s Warming, isn’t it?” I called to Cersus as her mock battle was drawing to a close. She finished with a flurry of blows and a small flutter of her wings before pumping a hoof in the air.

“WOOOOOO!” She happily cried, not hearing my question. I would tell her later the outfit is a gift, but now I needed to procure one for Topaz on short notice.


Several ideas came and went but one stood out as the epitome of uncouthness, and cheese that Cadence would surely approve if I asked…

“We need to hurry Cersus.” I informed my young charge as I trotted by, forcing the surprised nymph to catch up.

“Wha.. woah.. Hold on.!” She cried as she matched my pace with a slight windedness from her battles.

“Something has come up, and if I’m to make the time limit, I need to hurry.”

“Wha..what thing?” She asked, trying not to gallop.

“I must seek Topaz’s opinions on a matter that can not wait until tomorrow. Would you mind Cadence and Shining Armor’s company for a couple of hours?” I asked, with every intent of having her watched by their inexperienced hooves, well Shining’s hooves anyway, but felt it appropriate to ask.

“What!?”

“No other foal could say they were important enough to be watched by the rulers of The Empire.”

“DEAL!” She immediately accepted, her brief fatigue forgotten as the rush of being important enough to have a princess and prince look after her. I smiled as her excitement was infectious.

I had a short amount of time to put this together. I was confident Topaz will not only approve of this, but will have great difficulty one-upping this act any time soon.


“Hold on, coming!”

I heard Topaz shout from the other side of our room’s door. I stood waiting with the food cart in hoof, trying not to provoke the undergarment from further bothering me. The talk with the Castle Staff had been one I wish to forget, but knew that was wishful thinking when it came to ponies wanting to be in the know. Topaz needed to hurry up.

‘By Order, her hoof steps were slow...ah finally!’

“Sorry about that…” She froze with the door partly pulled open, her reddening fur brightening up the hallway.

“Room service, may I come in?” I asked, gesturing to the cart with a covered hoof. She stammered on, not even trying to hide her wings, and to save both of us from any more unneeded rumors I proceeded to push the cart forward.

The movement broke the trance that had fallen over Topaz, making her step out of the way while opening the door wide enough for me to enter with ease. I desperately fought to maintain the professionalism the staff demonstrated on a regular basis, but the rouge undergarment kept fighting me the whole way.

How the maids wore this uniform on a regular basis left me feeling impressed as I gave in and reached back to grip the offending garment and adjust it over my flank. Never again.

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