The Looney Bin
Later that same day, things grew more insane than they had been thus far on this adventure. Following the recent kidnapping of Dan Marino, the police station was in a frenzy. Police officers races all over trying to determine a solution to this mystery. Various headlines had already hit the newsstands: “MARINO KIDNAPPED”, “STAR QB MISSING”, DAN, WHERE ARE YOU?” and even the Global headline read: “MARINO ABDUCTED BY ALIEN FRANCHISE!”. On the cover itself, Marino stood with several Space Aliens in football gear.
Not only that, but a mob of news reporters stood outside the doors seeking answers. Currently, Lt. Einhorn tried to make her way into the police station but was swarmed by zillions of reporters shouting all sorts of questions. It was complete, utter chaos.
“Lieutenant, have there been any ransom demands?” One reporter asked.
“There’s been no communication with the kidnappers at this time,” Einhorn responded casually.
“What’s going to happen to the Super Bowl?” Another reporter asked. “Will it be postponed?”
“As of now, the game is going on as scheduled.”
“Why wasn’t the public told about Snowflake’s kidnapping?”
“Secrecy was essential. We didn’t want any public interference.”
“Are the crimes related? And what about Roger Podacter’s murder?”
“I’m sorry,” Einhorn spoke abruptly, having enough. “I can’t comment any further. Now if you’ll excuse me.”
Einhorn pushed her way through the crowd of reporters and into the police station. The moment she was inside, Einhorn barked out orders to the other cops on her way for her office.
“Emilio, get me the autopsy on Podacter!” She ordered. “Aguado, send out a memo. No one talks to the press… and somebody get me a cup of coffee!”
Einhorn entered her office sighing in frustration, completely oblivious to the fact that Ace Ventura had hid behind the door.
“Tonight on ‘MIAMI VICE’, Crockett gets the boss coffee!” Ace spoke jokingly.
Einhorn turned toward the Pet Detective with such disdain. If looks could kill, Ace would surely be dead on the spot. Meanwhile, Ace just stood casually in the office, popping sunflower seeds.
“Ventura, when I get out of this bathroom, you better be gone.”
Einhorn proceeded to walk toward the private bathroom in her office.
“Is it number one or number two?” Ace asked quickly.
Einhorn turned and glared at Ace once again.
“I just want to know how much time I have,” Ace spoke, throwing his hands up in defense.
Einhorn proceeded toward the sink and began washing her hands.
“Oh, by the way, I went ahead and solved that pesky, Snowflake/Podacter/Marino thing,” Ace informed her.
“Oh yeah?” Einhorn humored him.
“Yeah, ever hear of a former Dolphin kicker named Ray Finkle?”
The water shut off and all was silent for a moment till Einhorn left the bathroom and sat in front of Ace.
“Alright Ventura, make it quick,” She spoke.
“I found a rare stone at the bottom of Snowflake’s tank,” Ace informed her. “It’s from a Dolphin ’82 AFC Championship ring. It would have been a Super Bowl ring, but Ray Finkle missed the big kick. Blames the whole thing on Marino. We’re talking paranoid, delusional psychosis. I saw the guy’s room… cozy if you’re Hannibal Lector.”
“So how does Roger Podacter fit in?” Einhorn questioned.
“My guess is Finkle was snooping around. Podacter recognized him. End of story. As for Snowflake… they gave him Finkle’s number and taught him how to kick a field goal. Finkle took it personally.”
Einhorn seemed to listen with great interest as Ace continued his explanation.
“So where is Finkle, now?” She asked.
“He broke out of a mental hospital. Did a Claude Raines. He’s been planning his revenge for years. Waiting for the perfect time to get back at the Dolphins. The time when it would hurt them the most… Super Bowl time! Man, I’m tired of being right!”
Einhorn took everything Ace told her into consideration and actually formed a small genuine smile. She proceeded to get up and walked right in front of Ace, sitting herself at the edge of the desk. Her demeanor now appeared much softer.
“Congratulations,” She smirked. “You’ve done some fine detective work… Ace.”
This actually caught Ace by surprise; Einhorn never called him by his actual name.
“Ahh, could you talk in my good ear?” Ace spoke, putting a hand to his ear. “I thought I heard you call me Ace.”
“Maybe I was wrong about you,” Einhorn answered seductively. “Maybe you are more than just a pet dick.
Suddenly, something happened that no one would ever expect to happen in a million years. Einhorn crashed her lips on Ace’s and they both fell onto the desk in a heated make-out session. Objects fell off the desk as they leaned back. Eventually, Einhorn finally pulled away while biting Ace’s lip in the process.
“Your gun’s digging into my hip,” Ace told her.
“What’s wrong, Ace?” Einhorn asked. “Want me to read you your rights?”
“Maybe later.”
Ace finally pushed her off himself and tried to regain his composure.
“What is it?” Einhorn asked dejected. “That bony little bitch, Melissa Robinson?”
“No, you just don’t do anything for me,” Ace responded defensively.
He quickly adjusted his crotch to conceal the erection. Einhorn withdrew with a coy smile.
“I’ll be here if you ever want a real woman,” She suggested with a wink.
Suddenly, there was a sharp knock at the door.
“What is it?” Einhorn asked irritated.
In response, Aguado opened the door and walked in.
“Everything okay in here?” He asked. “Heard some commotion.”
“Fine, Sergeant,” Einhorn responded casually.
“You want me to throw him out?” Aguado glared at Ace.
“Why don’t you throw yourself out,” Einhorn responded.
“… Yes, ma’am,” Aguado responded awkwardly.
As a crestfallen Aguado left the room, Ace and Einhorn were alone once again.
“Ace, I want you to leave everything to us,” Einhorn told Ace sincerely.
“Can’t do that, Lieutenant,” Ace responded confidently. “I was hired to find Snowflake.”
“When we find Marino, we’ll deliver Snowflake.”
“When I find Snowflake, I’ll deliver Marino.”
Ace proceeded to work his way out of the office and leave the police station, all the while Einhorn watched his every step.
<>
Meanwhile, while Ace was at the police station, the Mane Six and Spike decided to visit Woodstock to determine if he had come up with anything regarding the case. A full on thrash metal band were cranking on stage when the group walked into the club. Kids leapt wildly into the moshing pit. The same Burnout still thrashed his head wildly to the music. Pinkie walked up and started thrashing her head along with him.
“Nice to see you again!” She shouted to him. “I bet the bands have been killer! You know, I’ve been thinking of starting my own band! Any advice?”
The Burnout just kept thrashing as the girls, and Spike, spotted Woodstock watching the band a bit further away. They quickly made their way to join them.
“Oh hey, little birds,” He greeted with a smile. “How’s it goin’?”
“I suppose you could say things have gone from weird to weirder throughout this entire mission, Mr. Woodstock,” Twilight responded.
“Anything new on that dolphin?” Woodstock asked.
“We’ve been trying our hardest to find him and our missing friend but with little success so far,” Fluttershy answered. “As for everyone else looking, all they’ve done is put his picture on some tuna cans. Seems no one else is taking this very seriously.”
As they spoke, a singer roared on stage, sounding like a garbage disposal full of cutlery.
“Arroohhghhh! Myrrrooohghhh! Geroooghhh!”
The remainder of the group covered their ears with their hands, pressing with all their might.
“Sweet Celestia almighty!” Rarity cringed. “How can anyone call this noise music? Whatever happened to the fine art of opera?”
“I’ve heard better sounds from nails on a chalkboard,” Rainbow groaned.
“We once cared for a pregnant cat on the farm,” Applejack informed the girls. “She done made horrible sounds that didn’t even sound ‘this’ bad when she gave birth.”
“So, what can I do for you today?” Woodstock asked.
“We found our head suspect in this case,” Twilight told him. “Do you know anything about a former Dolphin kicker named Ray Finkle?”
“Sorry birdie, I can’t help you right now,” Woodstock apologized, mid-groove. “I gotta watch this band! They are the shit!”
“Are they?” Spike questioned seriously.
“Aren’t they?” Woodstock responded.
Everyone groaned in irritation over the fact Woodstock was so far not being helpful.
“Now what do we do?” Rainbow asked.
All of a sudden, an invisible lightbulb went off in Fluttershy’s head. The girl approached Woodstock with as much calm a face as she could muster.
“Alright, we understand,” She spoke casually. “I mean dolphins aren’t exactly an endangered species. It’s not like the whole food chain’s going to be affected if one highly intelligent mammal dies a slow, painful death! After all, if the band is loud enough, you won’t even hear its pitiful whimpering!”
Fluttershy soon performed her best suffering dolphin impression. All at once, Woodstock could no longer enjoy the band as he watched her.
“Alright, follow me,” He spoke, as he walked away.
Fluttershy winked over her shoulder toward her friends, who smiled back. There was no mistake that they were impressed with their usually shy friend’s cunning trick before following behind Woodstock.
<>
Down in Woodstock’s base of operations, the hippie fish protector was at his computer searching for any information on Finkle’s whereabouts. The girls and Spike stood behind him, looking over his shoulder as Finkle’s Social Security information appeared on the screen.
“This guy’s last reported income was September 1982,” Woodstock informed them.
“Okay, so we know he’s incredibly thrifty,” Twilight observed.
“Is he?” Woodstock asked.
“Okay, can we please stop with the whole ‘Are they? Aren’t they?’ thing already?” Rainbow asked. “The first time was funny, twice is alright, but now you’re just doing it over and over again! It’s ridiculous!”
“Is it?” Woodstock asked.
Rainbow groaned in irritation, slapping a hand over her ace. Again, Applejack started to give her a little shoulder massage to calm her down. Meanwhile, Woodstock typed some more information and Finkle’s TRW flashed on the screen.
“Well, I think we can be pretty sure he’s involved in the kidnapping of the dolphin.”
“Really?” Rarity asked. “What makes you say that?”
“There’s ‘two-thousand dollars’ worth of smelts on his VISA card.”
“Who would buy ‘two-thousand dollars’ worth of fish?” Pinkie asked. “The only ones I know with even ‘that’ many fish would be griffins and even they sound as though they’d spend that much on them.”
“Pinkie, I think he was just kidding,” Spike spoke deadpanned.
“Ooooooooooooh!” Pinkie realized. “Now that makes sense.”
“Can ya please give us some information we can actually use here?” Applejack spoke up.
“Alright already,” Woodstock responded. “The last time this guy used his credit card was June, ’84. He rented a car from Avis. And… eww… he was a bad boy. They found it abandoned two months later in South Miami.”
“Anything else?” Rainbow asked.
“Nope,” Woodstock shook his head.
“Well… you did all you could,” Rainbow sighed. “Thanks for nothin’.”
“Hey man, according to this, your friend Ray Finkle doesn’t exist.”
“Well, that doesn’t really help us out that much,” Spike spoke disappointed. “Either way, thanks for the help Woodstock.”
“No problem man,” Woodstock nodded. “Good luck finding your guy.”
The Mane Six and Spike proceeded to leave the basement and make their way back up top. It was then Ace Ventura walked into the club. The band was between songs, as Ace strolled by the burnout whose head had now stopped.
“Did you get all the spiders outta there?” He asked.
That’s when he noticed the Mane Six and Spike making their way towards him.
“Did you guys find any info from Woodstock?” He asked them.
“Your hippie buddy doesn’t have anything on Finkle,” Rainbow spoke irritated. “All he’s got is that he hasn’t had any income for the last few years.”
“How are we supposed to find anything on Finkle when no one has even seen or heard anything about him in forever?” Rarity asked.
“Um… guys?” Fluttershy interrupted.
“What is it Flutters?” Applejack asked.
“I think we have bigger problems,” Fluttershy pointed out.
Everyone turned toward the front door of the club where Fluttershy was pointing and noticed the two thugs that took Marino standing at the exit. They spotted Ace and started towards him, reaching inside their coats. Suddenly, the music started up again as the burnout’s head wailed. His manic gyrations interfered with the thugs long enough for Ace and the Equestrians to bolt. One of the thugs pushed the burnout violently against the wall as they pursued Ace.
“Thanks, man!” The burnout yelled. “You’re a great dancer!”
Ace pushed his way through the crowd, with the Equestrians following behind. The thugs were not far from the group. Ace neared the stage just as things turned wild. People dove off and were getting moshed. Just before the thugs could grab them, the group ran up and hurled themselves from the stage. The insane crowd began to pass them around their heads as Spike looked toward the thugs and shrugged with a sheepish smile. The thugs exchanged a look, then dove after Ace, and a ‘mosh’ chase ensued.
The group were passed back onto the stage as the song reached its end. The singer laid there exhausted. The heroes noticed the crowd was starting to put the thugs down. Thinking fast, Ace grabbed for the microphone off the floor.
“ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, SPANK ME MOMMY!” Ace screamed out.
The audience looked at Ace for a second, while the Equestrians gave credulous looks. Then, the band members exchanged a look and went for it!!
It’s a nightmarish little ditty. Ace sung like one of Satan’s minions. While the Equestrians stood baffled, the crowd seemed to understand. They threw the thugs high in the air again and moshed them away from the stage. All the while, the thugs shot stray bullets the whole time trying to hit their targets.
The Equestrians watched in astonishment as Ace incited the crowd further, with a punching gesture. The crowd followed their new leader, punching with one hand and moshing with the other. The thugs got the living crap ‘moshed’ out of them. Once the song ended, Ace raised his fists in the air in victory. The cheering crowd violently dropped the thugs and they’re out cold.
Ace and the Equestrians burst out the front door, collectively hopping into the car which peeled off down the road.
“Wow, that was crazy!” Spike spoke loudly.
“No kidding!” Rainbow agreed. “Luckily we got out of there.”
“Now what’re we supposed to do?” Twilight asked. “We still have nothing that could tell us where Ray Finkle is or where Snowflake, Phantom Dragon, and Dan Marino could be.”
“That’s not entirely true,” Ace smirked.
“What do ya mean Ace? Applejack asked.
“First things first… we need to pick up someone.”
<>
Later that night, Melissa Robinson was fast asleep in her bed after a long hard day. Ever sine Roger Podacter’s passing and the disappearance of Dan Marino, things at her job only grew far more hectic. Unfortunately, she found her sleep interrupted by a loud banging at her door. Melissa awoke, turned toward her clock which read 3:32 am. Reluctantly, she dragged herself to the door.
“Who is it?” She asked tiredly.
“Ira,” A voice responded from the other side.
“Ira who?”
“I refuse to do a ‘knock-knock joke’. Come on, open up!”
Melissa opened the door seeing Ace and the Equestrians standing outside. Pinkie was on the floor, rolling over with laughter at Ace’s joke.
“I refuse to do a ‘knock-knock joke’!” She laughed. “Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Where do you come up with this?! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!”
“Okay seriously Pinkie, it wasn’t really that funny,” Rainbow groaned.
“Ace, what are you doing?” Melissa asked. “It’s the middle of the night!”
“You have to commit me,” Ace responded with a smirk.
<>
The next day, the entire group found themselves driving down the highway in Ace’s car toward their next destination. The whole drive there, Melissa questioned the group about their plan and where exactly they were going.
“So what exactly is it that we’re doing again?” Melissa asked Ace.
“Finkle escape from Shady Acres in Tampa,” Ace responded. “They still have some of his stuff.”
“How do you know?”
“His parents told us,” Twilight answered. “Finkle blames the Dolphins’ Super Bowl loss entirely on Dan Marino and it sent him into a downward spiral into madness.”
“He’s completely obsessed with getting revenge on Marino and the Dolphins,” Rarity added.
“We hoping that whatever he’s planning, maybe he left some evidence in the mental hospital,” Fluttershy finished.
“So you think they’re going to let us just waltz in and look around?” Melissa asked skeptically.
“Not at all,” Ace answered. “Thankfully, I’m a master of disguise.”
“I can already tell this isn’t going to go well,” Spike sighed.
<>
Later, the group found themselves at Shady Acres Mental Institution in Tampa. It was a rather large, old building that was just crawling with many mentally unhinged people. Currently, everyone found themselves in the reception area where Melissa and the Equestrians were meeting with one of the head doctors.
“Mrs. Robinson? I’m Doctor Handly,” The Doctor introduced himself. “Now who is it that you’d like to have us look at?”
“My brother… Larry.”
Everyone turned back toward Ace, who sat in one of the seats. The man wore a tutu; his hair was insanely wild. He had a look of absolute insanity on his face as he stared back at the group.
“I’m ready to go in, Coach,” He spoke madly. “Just give me a chance. I know there’s a lot riding on it, but it’s all psychological. Got to stay in a positive frame of mind. Memorize the play book. Study the films.”
Ace struck a dramatic pose and froze with a manic look on his face.
“I’m gonna execute a button-hook pattern in super slow-mo!”
He proceeded to go forth and perform a whole bunch of crazy running motions in slow motion, much to the amazement (and also confusion) of the Equestrian heroes. He continued for a few moments before coming to a freezing halt.
“Let’s see that in an instant replay!”
Ace proceeded to do it all again in reverse before slumping back down in his chair and mumbling some incoherent things to himself.
“He’s a former football player,” Melissa explained to Dr. Handley. “Took a few too many blows to the head and now he’s declared clinically insane.”
“I see…” Dr. Handley nodded, noticing the Equestrians. “And how can I help you all today. Are you also here on behalf of Mrs. Robinson?”
“Oh no sir,” Twilight shook her head. “Actually, we were hoping you might be able to look at our friend Pinkie.”
Twilight pointed her thumb over her shoulder, and all eyes once more turned around. They saw Pinkie Pie sitting in a chair next to Ace. Only now, her hair was just as wild as Ace’s, and she had a look of pure insanity on her face. A little drool hung over her chin as she gently rocked back and forth in her chair.
“Bell-bell, make bad men go bye-bye!” She spoke insanely. “Bell-bell, make bad men go bye-bye. Bell-bell, make bad men go bye-bye!”
Everyone just stared at the insane pink girl rocking in her chair, as Rainbow Dash shook her head.
“Somehow I always knew we’d end up in this situation eventually.”
<>
Dr. Handley proceeded to give Melissa and the Equestrians a tour of the facilities, all the while explaining all the work they do at the hospital. While doing so, Ace and Pinkie both continued to act completely insane. After all, this was a role that they were both oddly well suited for.
“Your brother won’t be the first professional football player we’ve treated,” Dr. Handley informed Melissa.
“Is that right?” Melissa asked.
“Yes,” Handley nodded. “We’ve very sensitive to the emotion stress athletes have to endure.”
Ace raced across the grounds screaming ‘I’m open! I’m open!’ as if trying to catch a football. Meanwhile, Pinkie was on a nearby bench in a crouching position much like a cat.
“Gotta catch those crooks, I must!” She muttered. “Won’t let them get my treasure. No, no… I won’t. They’ll have to kill me first! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!!!”
She leapt off the bench and ran around in a circle, screaming at the top of her lungs. The rest of the group covered their ears from how loud she was being.
“Gotta give her credit,” Applejack said. “She’s one hay of a Bridleway actor.”
“We’ll have to do some preliminary evaluations, but I think your brother will fit in nicely here,” Handley assured. “The same can be said for your friend, young ladies. We have a great staff well suited to handle any form of mental illness.”
“I’d sure love to see them even try to handle Pinkie,” Spike muttered.
“That’s a relief, Doctor,” Melissa smiled.
“It seems that your facility is very well suited indeed,” Rarity nodded.
Ace took a ‘snap’ from a three-foot hedge and dove over it into the endzone. Melissa and the doctor stopped to watch him.
“He seems to have some difficulty letting go of the game. Has he had a long history of mental illness?”
“As long as I’ve known him,” Melissa answered truthfully.
“Same can be said for Pinkie,” Rainbow added. “I don’t even think mental illness are the proper words to describe her. We might have to make up a new one.”
Ace performed a wild touchdown dance with some of the other patients participating, while Pinkie Pie ran up and rolled on the ground much like a dog.
<>
The tour continued with Handley leading the group inside, showing them the innards of the building. Ace walked alongside them adjusting his imaginary shoulder pads and Pinkie hopped along like a bunny rabbit.
“This is our therapy room… arts and crafts…” Handley explained, mid-walk. “That’s the storage room. This hallway leads to another recreational area –“
Ace suddenly whistled loudly, gesturing like a referee.
“HALFTIIIME!!!” He yelled.
Ace stuck his head in the water fountain, then sat down on the bench outside the storage room. Pinkie soon walked up and observed a few birds flying outside the window.
“Ooh… look at the wee widdle birdies!” She smiled. “Ooh… maybe they’re looking for a statue to land on.”
She proceeded to freeze completely in place like a statue. Everyone looked at her and had to admire the fact she was completely unblinking and unmoving. It was like she was an ‘actual’ statue.
“He’ll be fine by himself for the next twenty minutes,” Melissa assured, referring to Ace.
“And Pinkie won’t dare move until someone puts a bird on her head,” Fluttershy spoke up.
“Well, why don’t I show you the dormitories, then?” Handley suggested.
The girls and Spike nodded in agreement as they proceeded to follow the doctor towards the dorms. This left Ace and Pinkie utterly alone in the hallway. Ace suddenly snapped out of his insane act, as well as Pinkie. Together, they entered the storage room.
“Yowie wowie, that was fun!” Pinkie spoke cheerfully. “We should come back tomorrow and do this all over again!”
“First things first, we’ve got work to do,” Ace responded.
Ace performed a quick search, locating several boxes marked ‘FINKLE’. Ace searched through the first couple boxes only to find clothes. But by the third box, he hit the jackpot: He found sicko arts and crafts dedicated to Marino himself. Die-Dan potholders, shredded Isotoner gloves, and even a little diary. Opening it up, they discovered ‘Laces Out!’ insanely scrawled on every page.
“Obsess much?” Ace said.
All of a sudden, the door opened, and a janitor was about to enter before getting into an argument with a fellow employee. Thinking quickly, trying not to get caught, Ace climbed half-hazardously into the box to cover himself up. Pinkie, unable to find a hiding place, once more resumed her statue-like composure. Thankfully, the janitor left just as the box holding Ace completely fell apart.
“Phew! That was super-duper close!” Pinkie sighed in relief.
While trying to pull himself back up, Ace found a newspaper clipping with a heading which read:
‘SEARCH CALLED OFF FOR MISSING HIKER’
“Hey Pinkie, take a look at this,” He ushered.
Pinkie quickly approached his side to gaze upon the newspaper as well.
“What is it?” She asked.
“’A massive search ended today when rescue workers were unable to find the body of Lois Einhorn…’” Ace read.
“’… a camper reported lost since Friday…’” Pinkie continued.
“Lois Einhorn… holy shit balls!”
Both Ace and Pinkie looked at each other, completely confused by the meaning of it all. Just then, something else caught Pinkie’s eye. Kneeling down, she picked up what resembled a letter of sorts and read it quietly to herself. Ace took notice and looked over her shoulder.
“You found something else?” He asked curiously.
Pinkie just read the letter before her eyes turned wide and she slowly turned toward Ace.
“I think I’ve found out how Phantom Dragon fits into all this,” She said.
She showed Ace the letter and they both read it:
The time has come to test whether or not you are worthy of joining our cause. We shall provide you with an escape but from then on, you will be solely responsible for the outcome of this endeavor. A friend of the Elements of Harmony will soon enter this world, your task is to capture him and keep him in a secure location until the time is right. When all is said and done, we will judge whether or not you are fit to join us.
- N
<>
At the police station, the telephone rang at Emilio’s desk, and he answered.
“Echavez,” He answered.
<>
Back at Shady Acres, Ace was on the phone in the hallways while some crazy guy hovered behind him.
“This is Chicken Little,” Ace spoke urgently. “The sky is falling.”
<>
“What?” Emilio answered confused. “I don’t get it. What’s it mean?”
<>
“It means she’s involved in this,” Ace explained. “The article’s dated the day before Finkle disappeared.”
“Before ‘who’ disappeared?”
“Finkle. Ray Finkle… the guy who took the dolphin? The guy you’re supposed to be looking for?! Einhorn didn’t tell you, did she?”
“Hey, Ace. I see where you’re goin’ with this and you’re goin’ alone.”
A crazy guy stood next to Ace now, mimicking everything the man was saying.
“Come on, E!” Ace insisted. “I tell her about Finkle, she doesn’t tell a soul. I have an article here that connects her with Finkle. You gotta’ check her out—DO YOU MIND?!?!”
The crazy guy stopped and moved to one of the phones.
“Ace, I like my job,” Emilio explained. “I get health insurance and benefits.”
“I’m the Lindberg Baby,” The Crazy Guy spoke into a receiver. “Come and get me.”
“Emilio, Einhorn is involved,” Ace insisted. “You’re gonna’ have to decide here. Listen, I gotta get off the phone. I think I just solved the Lindberg case.
It was then Melissa and the Doctor, along with the rest of the Equestrians, returned.
“Well, look who’s trying to use the phone,” The Doctor observed.
Ace covered the phone receiver and whispered to them in a heartfelt voice.
“Brian Piccalo is dead…” Ace whimpered.
As the man broke down, Melissa hung up the phone and lead him away. A thrash version to ‘Brian’s Song’ played as they left the hospital.
<>
Later that same evening, Emilio stood at the window watching Einhorn drive off. When the coast was clear, he snuck into Einhorn’s office. He rifled through her filing cabinet, tearing through all the papers. Then he searched her desk and sure enough stuffed in the back of the drawer he discovered a personal note. The signature upon it belonging to one Roger Podacter himself, written only just a day before his death.
<>
Meanwhile, Ace, Melissa, and the Equestrians pulled up in front of Melissa’s apartment.
“Good job today,” Ace complimented Melissa. “You’re quite a dirty rotten filthy liar.”
“Thanks,” Melissa replied flattered. “Are you sure you don’t want to stay here with me?”
“Nah, I got some thinking to do,” Ace responded. “Besides, you’d be safer with Salman Rushdie.”
“Okay.”
Melissa stepped out of the car, then turned and leaned through the window.
“Listen… I know there isn’t much time left,” She spoke softly. “The game is tomorrow. But I know you’ve done your best. It’s just an impossible situation. I don’t expect…”
“Hey…” Ace interrupted, leaning over for a kiss. “… bet on the Dolphins.”
After making contact, Melissa walked into her apartment as Ace and the others head back down the highway.
“That was quite the crazy day, wasn’t it?” Rarity asked.
“In more ways than one,” Spike nodded.
“I’ll admit it Pinkster, that was some nice acting back there,” Rainbow complimented, with a shoulder nudge. “You really had us going back there for a bit. Honestly, I thought you were going completely insane.”
“I was supposed to be acting?” Pinkie asked confused.
Everyone snapped their heads toward Pinkie with confusion.
“Ya didn’t know?” Applejack asked.
“Not at all,” Pinkie shook her head. “If I did, I would’ve acted completely crazy. Course, I’d need some cupcakes… and a volunteer… Rainbow…?”
“Uh… no!” Rainbow shook her head quickly.
“Wait a minute!” Spike spoke up. “You mean to tell us that everything you did today…”
Then before he could go on, they all came to a stunning realization: This was Pinkie Pie they were talking to. She was already crazy as it was just in a daily basis. With that in mind, they turned their heads forward as Ace continued driving down the road.
<>
Later…
Out of their human disguises, every pony (And Spike) sat in the living room of Ace’s apartment trying to figure out what they found at the hospital. Wiggles the dog approached the answering machine on the table and clicked the button with his little nose. The first message in the machine came from Mr. Shikadance, the landlord.
“Venturaaaa? Your time is up! You’re out! You hear me?! No rent… no roof!”
The next message came from Emilo.
“Ace, it’s E. Got something you might find interesting. It’s a note from Podacter to Einhorn, thanking her for a wonderful Saturday night. Something ain’t stirring the kool-aid man.”
“Wiggles, rewind,” Ace instructed.
Wiggles obediently hit another button and rewinds the phone tape. Ace, popping sunflower seeds, held some evidence aloft thinking. A bird ate the seeds out of his naval.
“What the hell does Lois Einhorn have to do with Ray Finkle?” Ace asked himself. “Come on, think!”
“Don’t worry Ace,” Twilight spoke comfortingly. “We’ll figure this out.”
“How?” Rainbow asked. “I mean sure we know Finkle is clearly behind this and ‘somehow’ he’s in league with the Dark Order. But none of it matters unless we know where the dude is.”
“Calm down sugar cube,” Applejack grabbed Rainbow’s hand. “We’ll figure it out like we always done before.”
“Hopefully soon,” Rarity sighed. “I dread being away from my family and my husband for so long.”
“Then let’s get thinking,” Pinkie smiled. “I know… what if we did a ‘Noodle Dance’?”
“NOOO!!!” The group groaned.
“Just a ‘suggestion’…”
Over the next few hours, Ace and the Equestrians worked endlessly to come up with some idea as to how it all fit together. Thus far, every idea they came up with started to sound more absurd than the last.
“Finkle and Einhorn…” Ace spoke to himself. “In it together. How? Why?”
“Where could they be keeping Phantom?” Twilight wondered.
“Why kill Roger Podacter?” Rarity questioned.
“And why can’t I get my exploding cupcake formula to work?” Pinkie asked herself.
A small monkey sat in the same position, as if mocking Ace for his own amusement.
Even later still, Ace paced while jumping up and down. The Pet Detective was trying ‘so hard’ to get his intuitive juices flowing. The monkey, likewise, jumped along the mantle.
“Alright!” He spoke determinedly. “Here we go! Answer’s right there! Just gotta get some blood to the brain! Finkle and Einhorn! Finkle and Einhorn! Finkle and Einhorn! Finkle and Einhorn!”
All the animals just watched him like he’s crazy.
<>
Eventually, the night turned to daybreak as Ace sat and stared at a picture of Finkle on the coffee table. The man was totally spent, practically on the verge of tears. Most of the girls, Spike especially, had since fallen asleep… except for Twilight, who was wide awake going over a pile of notes.
“Oh no, that doesn’t add up,” She muttered. “What about… no. Or maybe… no, not that either. Urgh! What ‘is’ it?”
“Finkle and Einhorn…” Ace whimpered. “Einhorn and Finkle…”
He turned to see the monkey and the others crashed out in a heap on the sofa.
“Quitters…” He grumbled.
Wiggles jumped up onto the coffee table now. But Ace couldn’t be bothered with him.
“What do you want?” He asked irritated. “Huh? I got no food for you. You gotta have money to buy food; I gotta find the dolphin to get the money. I don’t see any dolphins around here, do you?”
Wiggles whimpered at the tone of his voice, quickly hopping off before jumping up onto the coffee table and laid down. Ace slumped his head into his hands in defeat.
“Face it, it’s hopeless…” He whimpered, defeated. “Your master is a LOSER.”
“Don’t beat yourself up Ace,” Twilight told him. “There isn’t anyone who could do as much as you’ve done so far. You found the prime suspect, you determined the motive, you’ve basically solved the whole case and just don’t know it.”
Ace cracked a sarcastic smile as he looked toward Twilight.
“That’s all well and good Twilight,” He said sarcastically. “Why don’t I just pat myself on the freakin’ back for a job well ‘half’ done?!”
“Don’t get upset with me,” Twilight countered. “Especially to ‘us’, who have been ‘trying’ to help you ever since this whole case began? We’re the ones putting in the time for ‘your’ needs just as much as you put your time on ‘us’!”
Ace sighed as he slumped back onto the couch.
“I’m sorry,” He apologized. “I’m just so frustrated! The answer might be right in front of us, and we just aren’t seeing it. Maybe everyone was right; I am a loser.”
Twilight shook her head as she turned back toward her notes. However, as she did, something caught the corner of her eye as she slowly turned to the coffee table where Wiggles was laying. The way he laid, some of his fur covered the picture of Ray Finkle in a way that it almost made him look like…
It was then a lightbulb in Twilight’s head went off.
“LOO… HOO…”
“I’ve got it Ace!” Twilight interrupted loudly.
Her sudden outburst caused the rest of the team to wake from their slumber.
“What’s all the noise Twi?” Rainbow asked sleepily.
“I’ve figured it out!” Twilight responded.
“What?” Rarity asked, yawning.
“Why didn’t I think of it before? It all makes complete sense!”
“What are you talking about Twilight?” Fluttershy asked.
“Think about it,” Twilight answered. “That newspaper article said Lois Einhorn was lost while hiking a few years ago and yet she’s doing completely fine now. If she had ‘truly’ been found, why wouldn’t there be any news that she’d been found?”
“Uh… continuity error?” Pinkie shrugged.
“Not even just that… consider the fact Ray Finkle essentially hasn’t even existed since that article came out,” Twilight continued. “Not to mention Einhorn has bee trying to completely dissuade us from the entire case in general.”
Twilight approached the table where Wiggles laid, showing them all the picture of Finkle with the dog hair over it.
“Take a look at this picture. If you subtract the long hair, you can completely tell who you’re looking at. But add the hair… maybe a new look…”
Everyone took a long, hard look at the picture. All of a sudden, all eyes widened with realization.
“Oh… my… Faust!” Spike gasped.
“It can’t be!” Rainbow said bewildered.
“What the…” Ace wondered. “That’s it. That’s it!”
“Nope, I’m completely lost,” Pinkie giggled.
“Don’t you see Pinkie?” Twilight asked.
“Einhorn is Finkle!” Ace concluded. “Finkle is Einhorn! Einhorn is a man!”
Everyone looked toward Ace with a more sickened look on all their faces.
“Ace… didn’t ya say she done kissed ya?” Applejack pointed out.
Ace’s expression quickly turned sour as he realized what that meant.
“OH MY GOD!!!” He yelled. “EINHORN IS A MAN!!!”
Ace made a mad dash into the bathroom. Furiously he brushed his teeth, rinsed his mouth with mouthwash, spat it out and gagged, and then burned all his clothes before hopping into the scalding shower. Slowly, he curled up into a ball under the steaming water, an expression of horror plastered on his face. From outside the bathroom, the Equestrians leaned against the door feeling sorry for the pet detective.
“You know girls… that’s ‘kind of’ similar to my experience when Pharynx tricked me into thinking he was Gabby,” Spike shuddered.
“Yeah… that joke is not going to age well in today’s media,” Pinkie shook her head.
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Okay, I know I said before Pinkie can be scary but...that, is the most terrifying thing I've ever seen.
Wait, seriously?
Ah that last part always made me laugh. Even if he did find out Einhorn was a man, the way he reacted was hilarious.
Looney bin is right... when someone comes from an insane place like a psychiatric hospital, especially a deranged patient... that is never a good sign. But in this case, they needed to get into that place to learn more about Ray Finkle. Not only did they learn about how far his obsession is, but somehow he has a connection with the Dark Order and the part he has in Phantom Dragon's disappearance. But more so than that, more so than that... they've learned there's a bigger connection between Ray Finkle and Lois Einhorn, a woman who is 'not' as she seems to be. And we're just building up to something big that's about to take place.
11378551
As dated as that joke is, we have to admit that was very funny. In today's media, that's kind of like the internet. You talk to some random person and think they are some insanely hot chick based on the pictures and stuff. Only to find out when you're ready to meet them face-to-face they're not like in the picture. They are actually an older woman pretending to be sixteen or worse... it is a man who lives in his mom's basement spending his days sitting on his chair with Cheetos dust on their white muscle shirts. It's a rather frustrating ordeal that few users do not wish to admit they've experienced.
11378561
Uh...I'm not sure how to respond to that.
Ooooh very exciting
Well, this was certainly one crazy chapter, if you'll pardon my saying so. So, Finkle seems to be involved with the Dark Order and kidnapping Phantom Dragon, and our heroes just found out Einhorn's big secret.
Also,
pinkie really can be terrifying when she acts like this..still remember that scene from the mlp fim movie
11378564
Technically, you 'did' respond. Not exactly an answer to the statement, but a response is a response.
11378566
Yep. So much going on in one chapter. A chase in a mosh pit, a trip to a psycho mill, and discovering some guy is impersonating a dead woman. Oh yeah... we somehow managed to compile it all into one chapter.
11378569
Einhorn is pretty much a 90s 'Hedwig' at this point... minus the angry inch (We'll know why soon). The thing is: Our heroes cannot just go to the police and tell them some has-been football star is impersonating their police lieutenant. They already think Ace belongs in the looney bin. They need proof.
Discord's Theatre, Galaxy Branch
Postwar: Okay then, you lot ready to see what happens next.
Sunset Shimmer: Absolutely. I can't wait to see what happens next.
Postwar: Then let's...*Item appears next to him*, huh?
Postwar looked at it, and from the looks of it, it appeared to be a puzzle box. He picked it up and inspected it, until he received a telepathic message.
Massager: (Telepathy) Post, it's me.
Postwar: (Telepathy) Massager? What's going on?
Massager: (Telepathy) Listen, I just recently received a puzzle box. The Young Six and I discovered a puzzle box. I think that Phantom is trying to send us a message.
Postwar: (Telepathy) Really, that's great. But I sense a "But" there.
Massager: (Telepathy) The box can only be unlocked by both science and magic.
Postwar: (Telepathy) Like Alchemy?
Massager: (Telepathy) Exactly. I already unlocked it with magic, so you're going to have to unlock it with science. And hurry, I sense he doesn't have much time.
Postwar: (Telepathy) I'm on it.
Postwar turned to the others:
Postwar: Mind if you guys watch this without me?
Sunset Shimmer: What's going on?
Postwar: Phantom was able to send a message to a college of mine. He sent him a puzzle box that can only be unlocked by science and magic. He did the magic part, now the science is on me.
Cal Kestis: And you're planning to solve this?
Postwar: I am. Is there a lab somewhere?
Galen Marek: We have one just about half a mile from here.
Postwar: Great, thanks. Let me know how it goes. *Runs off to solve the puzzle box*.
next
11378570
We've seen how scary she can be on several occasions throughout the time G4 was standing at the top of the MLP mountain (Perhaps even higher than G1). It all stems from an emotional conflict within herself, we mostly see her as this happy-go-lucky pony who jokes, sings randomly, and likes parties... but beneath all that, there's that inner turmoil she's so good at hiding.
So the dark order is behind this. Which explains why Phantom was captured in the first place by Ray Finkle
I don’t know what I should be concerned and/or afraid about more..the fact pinkie wasn’t acting or the fact she is referencing the mlp horror cupcake animation
You know, I really feel bad for Ace after he found out that Einhorn is a man and...Oh, God, I don't even wanna think about it! *shudders*
11378587
And he wasn't even feeling it from his superior in the first place. But only by then does it occur to Ace that there was 'a lot' more to Einhorn than he realized. That there was 'never' an Einhorn.
Yeah, you’re right about that Pinkie
11378580
Yeah that is true. She is so good at hiding it when she always shown to be upbeat And happy on daily basis
But you know it can get serious when she doesn’t act like her usual self
Previous
Discord's Theatre, Galaxy Branch
Ahsoka Tano: Uh, I think things went from bad to worse.
Galen Marek: That's an understatement.
Luke Skywalker: I sense that she's hiding something.
Cal Kestis: I'll say, you can see it on the look on her face.
Ganodi: Whoa, how did he do that?
Petro: I guess like Pinkie Pie he's full of surprises.
Sunset Shimmer: Trust me when I say this; no one can top Pinkie Pie.
Katochi: Okay, first of all, ewe. And second, you never ask a lady that when she goes to the bathroom.
Petro: Please, you're no lady. *Gets slapped by a couple of ladies*.
Byph: That's one way to get her attention.
Sunset Shimmer: *Facepalms*, oh great, now he's starting to have Rainbow's ego.
Leia Organa: Honey, the only one who has a bigger ego is both Han and Lando.
Han & Lando: Hey!!
Ganodi: Oh no...
Byph: What?
Katochi: The old flirting technique.
Mando: The animal is slowly luring his prey in.
Half the folks gag at what they're seeing.
Sunset Shimmer: Uh, I hope Ben's not...
They all saw Ben unconscious on the chair with a bump on his head, with a note that says "It's alright, I've distracted him. Postwar."
Zatt: Well, that's one way to do it.
Zatt: Well, can't say she didn't have it coming, *Gungi growls in agreement*
Cal Kestis: That was a close one.
Galen Marek: Indeed. For some reason, I feel something off about her.
next
There's an "it's a trap" joke in here somewhere, but I'd rather not.
Previous
Sunset Shimmer: Uh, no offense Pinkie. But myself, your counterpart and the others already have that position.
Han Solo: Nice to see he's keeping himself busy.
Leia Organa: *sighs*, people can be so cruel.
Sunset Shimmer: Tell me about it.
Sunset Shimmer: Most rock music sound like that.
Lando Calrissian: They call that music?
Sunset Shimmer: Ugh, Applejack, no one needs to know that.
Leia Organa: Glad we have informants who don't act like that.
Han Solo: Except for that one in Ord Mantell.
Mando: There are also other places where the informants tend to charge extra. To bleed you dry of your credits as an excuse to feed themselves. *Sunset looks at him, with him looking back* I meet that kind of people a lot in my work.
Sunset Shimmer: When you get a job that involves helping someone, make sure you include me in it.
Mando: Deal.
Luke Skywalker: Your friend there is quite resourceful.
Sunset Shimmer: *smiles fondly*, she is.
Sunset Shimmer: If I would I would've so punched him in the neck.
Luke Skywalker: Remember, Jedi do not...
Sunset Shimmer: *Groans*, do not seek aggression, I know.
Galen Marek: For you maybe.
Ganodi: That wasn't very helpful at all.
Ahsoka Tano: Most of them are like that, trust me.
Zatt: Oh boy, now they're in trouble.
Petro: Ten credits something crazy happens.
Ganodi: You're on.
Petro: Yes, knew it!! *Ganodi pays him ten credits*.
Byph: Bet it's Melissa. She's the only one Ace went to for help.
Cal Kestis: Very perspective.
Zatt: You call that a joke.
Petro: A Gundark's fart noises are more funnier. *Everyone gives him strange looks*, well they are.
Lando Calrissian: And soon the crazy comes in.
next
Awesome!
Pinkie and Ace in the hospital were hilarious, especially since Pinkie wasn't acting. And now thanks to Twilight they learned the truth about Finkle, but bad news this revelation left Ace with a very bad taste. And Spike bringing up that Pharynx pulled a stunt like that on him by impersonating Gabby, well I can imagine he'd be hiding out in his room if he had almost done something to the disguised changeling but didn't when he revealed himself.
Previous
Sunset Shimmer: Well what did you expect Spike? Not everything works out like you expect it to. *Gets a ring from her holophone and picks it up*
Postwar: (Contacting) You mean like it didn't work out for you of becoming a princess and you ended up being a cruel bully?
Sunset Shimmer: *Blushes in embarrasment and grumbles* Thanks for bringing that up.
Leia Organa: Wow, he makes a really good actor.
Luke Skywalker: Indeed. Were there people who had talents to perform for others like that.
Everyone shivered when they saw Pinkie act like that.
Ben Solo: *Who woke up and just saw it*, okay, now that is the scariest thing I have ever seen.
Petro: Ditto.
Mando: She's good.
Sunset Shimmer: Trust me, Pinkie is a lot more crazier when she's not trying.
Postwar: *voiceover* Wait till they find Arkham!! *Everyone looks around confused*
Ben Solo: *shivers* Please make it stop, I can't take it anymore!! *Gets a hug from his mother*.
Sunset Shimmer: I gotta hand it to Pinks, she really knows how to sell it.
Galen Marek: And I thought she was just random when I first met her.
Leia Organa: If we had those two in the rebellion, the Empire would've been scared to their knees.
Han Solo: Yeah, no kidding.
Petro: Wait, what?! How is that possible?!
Katochi: I think we should look at this further and find out.
Sunset Shimmer: No way, did Phantom somehow get captured by the Benefactor?
Luke Skywalker: Let us continue to see Sunset Shimmer. For the Force will reveal to us soon in time.
Ben Solo: Can this please be over now?!!
Leia Organa: It's alright honey. It'll be over soon.
Luke Skywalker: And so the clues are finally taking place.
Sunset Shimmer: Aw, taht was adorable.
Ben Solo: Ewww. *Some of the girls roll their eyes on this*.
Everyone was about to say something, but then remembered and said:
Everyone: It's Pinkie Pie, don't question it.
next
Extra Cut
Me: *chuckles while hiding with Ace* Ok, that was funny.
Extra Cut
Me: Yeah, no harm in that.
Extra Cut
Me: *to the readers* Can anyone say 'Possible foreshadowing?'
Extra Cut
Me: Quite the sore spot I'll say.
Extra Cut
Me: Boy do I know the feeling.
Extra Cut
Me: I believe she did.
Extra Cut
Me: *can't help but feel like there's something off about Einhorn*
Extra Cut
Me: Well that's a bummer...
Extra Cut
Me: What?...
Extra Cut
Me: I've been in crazier situations with Homer.
Spike: Homer?
Me: Uh, I'll save it for a possible future adventure.
Extra Cut
Me: Yeah, we're in serious stuff right now.
Extra Cut
Me: Just leave everything to the two of us, Spike.
Extra Cut
Me: Quite sad really.
Extra Cut
Me: I feel for her.
Extra Cut
Me: I'll let the Manehattan ponies know you said that.
Extra Cut
Me: *I stay behind* That was really good guys.
Extra Cut
Me: Now, let's see what stuff Finkle left here.
Extra Cut
Me: Totally...
Extra Cut
Me: *coming out of hiding* No kidding.
Extra Cut
Me: Lois Einhorn missing... Very intriguing.
Extra Cut
Me: You have?!
Extra Cut
Me: A secure location... I wonder where that could be...
Extra Cut
Me: Wait till you all see what we found out.
Extra Cut
Me: *holding me head* Oh no, another fanfic flashback.
Extra Cut
Me: Kool-Aid Man, I miss that guy.
Extra Cut
Me: We must figure it out. Not just for Phantom's sake, but also for the sake of Snowflake.
Extra Cut
Me: Now's not the time for preschool songs, Pinkie.
Extra Cut
Me: That never worked for Peter Griffin, so it probably wouldn't work for you either.
Extra Cut
Me: She's right Ace, you shouldn't give up when you're so close.
Extra Cut
Me: Ace...
Extra Cut
Me: I doubt that one.
Extra Cut
Me: Oh... My... Lord...
Extra Cut
Me: *standing by while praying for Ace's soul. Quietly speak to myself* Now we know our Dolphin kidnapper and who captured Marino. Phantom, wherever you are, sit tight. We're coming for you now.
Previous
Byph: Oh dear, they didn't hit a deadend already did they?
Sunset Shimmer: Not yet. They're still trying to figure this all out.
Petro: Sheesh, this guy can't give him a break.
Mando: I'd have just shot the guy.
Sunset Shimmer: Yeah, that's your answer for everything.
Han Solo: Are they always like this back in your world?
Sunset Shimmer: Yeah, pretty much. You get used to it.
Lando Calrissian: Glad we didn't have a think tank like that. We don't think, we just do.
Han Solo: Hey, that's my line.
Leia Organa: He's already losing it.
Sunset Shimmer: Come on Ace, don't give up.
Everyone: What? What?!
Postwar: *Voiceover* Wait for it!!!
Postwar: *Voiceover* Wait for it!!!
Everyone began to groan and moan in sickness as they couldn't believe it either the moment they began to realize it too.
Everyone blocks and cringes in disgust when some had seen what Ace had been doing.
Sunset Shimmer: Or in the future!!
Postwar: *Voiceover* But still funny as hell!!
next
Can’t breathe lol 😂, I was laughing so hard reading this chapter, I totally got the cupcakes and Rainbow reference, Pinkie scares me on a number of levels *shudders*
Ah yes. That one scene. There's definitely a bit of rewatch bonus with Einhorn's earlier interactions. I will say I was kind of start to feel bad for Finkle after putting a lot of things into a perspective... then I remembered the part about the hiker and oh right...the dolphin amongst other stuff. I also put together that we got a deleted scene there. Nice to see more of Woodstock in the process.
11378737
We definitely aimed for this chapter to be as funny as possible. And we had to have some pretty smart users who got the references in the fandom.
11378754
You would almost think that Ray Finkle was someone to feel bad about. A potential all-star athlete who choked at the height of his career, then the whole town hates him and he suddenly suffers a huge mental breakdown. Turns out, he was never meant to be a character to feel sorry for in the first place. He kidnapped a dolphin (And a friend of the Mane Six in this canon), then he murdered a man... not to mention he's a deranged psycho. So yeah... definitely a villain.
Almost no clues as to the whereabouts of Marino, Snowflake and Phantom Dragon; In addition to being chased by thugs, Ace, Spike and The Girls search for clues in the one place they're missing: the mental hospital Ray escaped from. Being a place where their character makes them a perfect fit, Ace and Pinkie discover that The Dark Order (if that was the name) freed Ray for revenge and a position in the organization in exchange for him kidnapping Phantom for them; and the leader (or the one who helped Ray) calls himself "N".
. The culprit was in front of them all this time (and kissed Ace on the mouth 
). Now, since the police chief is the culprit, and given her "relationship" with the police, how are they going to confront her (sorry, him)?
.
But that's not the only surprise: It turns out that Finkle and Einhorn are THE SAME!!!
And I point out that, apart from being a very funny chapter, I liked seeing the relationship between Ace and the girls. Of course, their character sometimes annoys them, but at the end of the chapter it is seen how they have become the group of friends who accept and trust you despite the fact that everyone else sees you as a weirdo and a failure
PS: Fluttershy has surprised me; and I've seen the reference to "Cupcakes".
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ACE, THE MANE SIX AND SPIKE, THOSE TRANSPHOBIC BIGOTS!!! CAN'T THEY CLEARLY SEE THAT THE MAN RAY FINKLE IS NO MORE, AND IDENTIFIES AS A WOMAN NAMED LOIS EINHORN? WHY CAN'T THEY LEARN TO RESPECT AND NORMALIZE ANOTHER INDIVIDUAL'S GENDER PREFERENCES. THEY ALONG WITH YOU NAZIS IN THE COMMENTS WHO STILL CALL LOIS EINHORN A HE SHOULD BE CANCELLED IMMEDIATELY! Ha Ha just kidding, its one of the funniest scenes in the movie! 😂 Pinkie Pie is right, today's culture doesn't allow certain forms of comedy thanks to the woke cancel culture mobs on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, etc. If we're not careful we could see this film locked away in the vault with other films such as Song of the South.
yeah IF this movie got remade in today time they would got rid off the einhorn is man angle and go for something completely different but still funny
11379247
Yeah, well, it is still disgusting. I have nothing against transgendered folks and see what's the fuss is all about, but still!
Anyway, yeah, it is funny big time but cancel folks make it hard for us to have fun anymore.
11379247
Sir... I'm going to have to ask you to calm yourself down with that statement. if you disrupt the audience again, we're not going to permit you to comment on the story without throwing off any insensitive remarks. You understand? That means, no more stories that we may have mention of Cozy Glow in our series for you to talk about. So I'll ask again:
Do you understand?
11378842
The Dark Order must definitely be desperate to want a patient from a mental institution in the group. It seems like they really don't care about the friend of Twilight and her group. They just want to lure the group into a trap and once they are out of the way they can focus on their plans on world domination. Though being they are villains, can Finkle really trust that they'll actually let him into their circle?
Yeah, that realization that Finkle and Einhorn are the same person was 'definitely' a surprise that first time. And indeed the girls and Ace have grown quite a friendship amongst themselves.
11379489
Okay, I’m sorry if my comment upset anyone. Just you let you know I have love, sympathy and compassion for trans people, but I have none of that for the bullies of PC cancel culture. Not to mention you brought up Cozy Glow in a conversation that had nothing do with her.
Previous
11378701
Discord's Theatre, Galaxy Branch
From right at the workshop that the others have graciously given him, Postwar was able to put the machines and wires together. He placed the puzzle box on a type of pedestal. He walked over to a large lever near the wall and looked at it.
Postwar: Well, here goes nothing, etcetera.
He pulled the lever, allowing it activate and electrical surges go through and into the puzzle box. It began to float whilst twisting and turning at the same time.
The machine began to identify a few things that caught his attention.
Postwar: What's this? *Looks through it*. Elements of H20, along with elements. Combination of hydrogen and oxygen, even a few others. Wait, that's elements for seawater. Hmm, but it's slightly changed.*looks through it*, wait, there also happens to be trace elements of paint. The kind that you would find on a type of boat. But not just any boat. This kind of paint goes to a boat that would be large enough to paint.
He walked back and forth and pondered.
Postwar: If I had to guess, both Marino and Snowflake had to be taken where no one would suspect. A place that would store ships, that would have their own warehouse, but would also be a place where they would store a boat to close it in order to keep someone trapped where it wouldn't escape.
That's when he realized something.
Postwar: Of course, they'd have to be at the docks somewhere. Not somewhere public, but somewhere private. Unless...*realizes something*, a docks where it's been abandoned where no one would dare to look.
He looked at the numbers appearing.
Postwar: They look like coordinates. *Looks through it and realizes where it was pointing at*. Of course, it makes sense. Miami happens to have yacht storage facility, but the place had been abandoned for years. It makes perfect sense.
Postwar quickly wrote down the coordinates and location of the place. He then made two copies and placed them on one puzzle box and another on a note. He used his power to sent them to both Massager and HunterBrony. He then contacted Massager.
Postwar: Massager, it's me. I found out where Phantom, Malino and Snowflake are. I've sent them over to you and Hunter.
Massager: Thanks, I just received it.
Postwar: I'll get over there as soon as...
He then heard a loud noise outside. He quickly took a peak and to his shock, he saw what appeared to be an Imperial transport. It opened, allowing four platoons of Storm Troopers, two platoons of Death Troopers, a squad of Inquisitors and a platoon of robot like Storm Troopers.
But to his shock, he saw the Dazzlings walking out, with Andromedis and Demetria behind.
Postwar: Uh, Massager. We got a problem. I just spotted the Dazzlings. They're near the Galaxy theatre.
Massager: What? What are they doing there?
He watched them walk towards where Sunset and the others were as a handful of Storm Troopers chose to stay behind. He got angry when he realized what they were doing there.
Postwar: Oh, I have a pretty good idea.
Massager: Get back here now, we'll send some backup and...
Postwar: No. I'll deal with them myself.
Massager: What?! You can't!!!
Postwar: Relax, I got this.
Massager: But why are you doing this?!
Postwar took a deep breath and opened his eyes. One eye shining blue, the other shining red.
Postwar: They made it damn personal.
He placed the communicator away and pulled out his Lightsaber and made his way towards the Storm Troopers near their transports.
11380480
*getting the message and coordinates* Thanks Post. Girls, I got a message from a friend showing where Phantom, Marino, and Snowflake might me.
Twilight: That's great Hunter!
Fluttershy: Let's go rescue the three!
Ace: Allllllllrighty then!~
Well, that was certainly a twist-
Now can someone kindly point me in the direction of whichever Discord's Theater commentary led to Pharynx tricking Spike into thinking he was Gabby? I must've missed that one and I'd rather like to go read it, it sounds hilarious
After that nerve-wracking car chase a note appears in my hand then I get a message from Post.
Postwar: Massager, it's me. I found out where Phantom, Malino and Snowflake are. I've sent them over to you and Hunter.
Myself: "Thanks, I just received it."
Postwar: I'll get over there as soon as...
There was a pause in his sentence like something happened.
Myself: " Post... Post talk to me, what's going on?"
Postwar: Uh, Massager. We got a problem. I just spotted the Dazzlings. They're near the Galaxy theatre.
Myself: "What? What are they doing there?"
Postwar: Oh, I have a pretty good idea.
Massager: "Get back here now, we'll send some backup and..."
Postwar: No. I'll deal with them myself.
Massager: "What?! You can't!!!"
Postwar: Relax, I got this.
Massager: "But why are you doing this?!"
Postwar took a deep breath and opened his eyes. One eye shining blue, the other shining red.
Postwar: They made it damn personal.
That was when I lost contact with him.
Myself: " Post... POST!
The others heard and got worried, Silverstream took the note and read the coordinates.
Silverstream : "The docks. Phantom Dragon is at the Miami Docks."
Gallus: " That's great but what's happening with Post?"
Myself : "He's being attacked by the Dazzlings at his theater."
They gasped at this and I got off my seat heading for the door.
Sandbar: " Where Are you going?"
Myself : If Post is under attack there's a possibility we may be too. I'm going to found out, if we are I'll hold them off if not then I got to find a way to help Post."
I almost made it out when a blast rumbled through the building. My suspicion was confirmed, Ocellus flew to me.
Ocellus: " Massager you can't fight on your own. I'll help!
Myself: you can't! You're not even a second year Witch yet you'll be killed before you even casted the first spell.
Ocellus: " But... But I still.
She started to cry and look away feeling guilty about her behavior with me but thn I made her face me.
Myself: " Hey it's ok! I've Already forgiven you especially after you were willing to give me a chance and helped me with the puzzle. I'll be back, I promise. "
I ran out and pulled out my wand. With a mighty wave I yelled Protego Maxima on the door.
The spell passed into the room sealing it tight and I ran outside. To my shock I saw fire and green flashes and several people in black robes and skull mask. Death Eaters!
I whistled for Fluffy and he came ready for battle, as I stood there I sent a message to Post and Hunter
Telephony " Post, Hunter it seems I have visitors too, Death Eaters. Which means old Daddys issue Tom is in on this too."
But I didn't sound worried in fact, I sighed in amusement.
Telephony : " Well it's time to show them who they're dealing with. Massager 32 aka The Dual Auror."
I flicked my left rest and my second wand appeared. A Ollivander Elder 14 1/2 inch Phoenix tail feather, then I jumped on to Fluffy and we charged into battle.
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*reading the second message* Please don't get killed, Massager...
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Screw the media, that was funny as hell.
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That's just cold and diabolical.
"Your gun's diggin into my hip. Oh Gooooooood."
* BOOM! Boom and rumble *
The theater shook s me battle raged outside, but the movie continues.
Apple Bloom: " Are they plum crazy? They're missing both their mascot and player yet they want to continue."
Sweetie Belle: " Unfortunately they have no choice. Even in my performances if down by one the show must go on."
Trixie: " the same for my shows. One time I twisted my back hoof and still I preformed."
The Wonderbolts nodded for they agreed.
Had this not been a time of fight there be laughter but still it was funny
Garble: " I wonder that too."
Gilda: " Maybe they were old friends and Roger tried to help him let go but Ray felt betrayed so he killed him.
Gabby: Ok eww!