• Member Since 21st Sep, 2019
  • offline last seen 1 hour ago

Crystalchameleon


"Your lies are bullets. Your mouth's a gun. And no war in anger was ever won." – Selena Gomez

E

The Pie family is very serious about their religion. Their religion believes that Equestria was created by writers and animators from another world in order to keep their otherworldly species entertained. Pinkie and her friends have the most legendary friendship in Equestria, but will it still stand after Twilight, Rainbow, Fluttershy, Applejack, and Rarity find out that Pinkie doesn't even believe that their world is real?


Make sure to check out this song by AC-527 partially inspired by this story. Thank you AC-527!

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 25 )

what about those fanfictionarialism? :pinkiecrazy:

I saw the story, and immediately went Yes.

I put this in my fav's before I'v even read it:pinkiecrazy:, what nonsense is this?!? :twilightoops:

I don’t know which to be more uncomfortable about, the religion itself or the fact Pinkie sees the screen.

This, not the Gospel of Judas, not the Dead Sea Scrolls, but THIS, is the greatest religious discovery of all time.

Meta-fiction gives me an itch in the cognition.

10351560
I'm interested in your religion...:yay:

This was surprisingly good, meta as all get-out but still really good.

Great example of meta done well!

Why does this feel like a fic that could lead to some FimFriction?

"I Think Therefore I Am" Giving the ponies the ability to think makes them alive.

I want this to be cannon

10351560
Sounds like an interesting sequel idea! :rainbowlaugh:

10352720
Yeah, I expected this to be very controversial. I wasn't too worried about it though because I didn't think many people would read it. :facehoof: I pretty much flipped out when I saw it on the Featured List. :rainbowlaugh:

10352735
I agree, but apparently Televisionarialists don't. :raritywink:

I always figured the Pies were Manenites :pinkiehappy:

Well, this succeeded in being funny, and a little heartwarming, but mostly funny. :pinkiehappy:

10352815
Could’ve been worse, that’s for sure. Glad to hear that people like it, though!

orp

The epilogue seems a bit unnecessary.

10351560
Crackfictionarism might explain 2020.

orp
orp #21 · July 27th · · ·

10352735
"I think..." only means that there's a though process containing that assertion, it doesn't necessarily follow that that thought process is produced by the "I" it asserts, so it cannot by itself attest to existence of any particular "I". More broadly, a subjective experience of being someone doesn't mean the subject of that experience is that someone (it's not uncommon to dream of being someone else while sleeping, for example).

In other words, there's something that produces the assertion/subjective experience, but that something doesn't need to be the same subjective person, or be only one thing producing thoughts corresponding to only one subjective person, or be conscious by itself, and so one and so forth.

An interesting concept, but the execution could use some refinement. For one, try to keep a character's actions in the same a paragraph as their dialogue. For example:

“Don’t make me choose,” Fluttershy said in between cries. Pinkie inhaled, and just when her friends were sure that she was going to burst into tears, she let out a calm-ish breath, a determined smile coming to her face.
“I’ll prove it to you,” she said, her mind already made up.

Here, the line break would work better after "between cries," thus keeping all of Pinkie contained inasmuch as anyone ever can contain her. "One paragraph per speaker" doesn't mean "line breaks always go before quotation marks."

Also, the whole thing feels talking-headsy. Characterization feels shallow, dialogue just serves as a vehicle for communicating the headcanon, and the conflict both spikes out of nowhere and doesn't really feel resolved... though that last part can apply to real world discussion of religion as well. :derpytongue2:

In all, an interesting idea delivered in an inexpert manner. Keep writing and reading; technical refinement will come through practice and exposure to other writing styles. And my criticism aside, thank you for the story. :twilightsmile:

10354231
Thank you for the critiques! Yeah, my writing skills could definitely use some work.:facehoof: Although to be fair, I wouldn't say that this story is one of my best.

In terms of characterization, I agree that it doesn't delve into their characters a whole lot. I wanted to portray this fic as if it were a cancelled episode of the show, and I don't think the show itself goes into each character's personality particularly thoroughly in every episode in the later seasons since we already know who they are and what they're like.

As for feeling unresolved in terms of religion, I agree with that too. The religious aspect of the story is vaguely based off of some of my real-life friendships, and often times the best possible way to end things is with mutual respect for each other's beliefs, even if we don't go too far into detail. (That's just in my experience. :twilightsmile:) My goal for this story in terms of the moral was to touch on Pinkie's insecurity and fear of people thinking that she's crazy, and learn that people (or in this case, ponies) don't need to believe her to respect her.

I try to have important 'lessons' in my fics, because that's something that I really like about the cannon show, and something that I like about most books that I read. When I write comedies like Televisionarialism, I think I tend to overshadow the moral with the comedy, and I need to find a way to have just as much comedy without diminishing the character development and plot. And of course, I obviously need to work on grammar, because you can never know grammar too well.

Thanks again for your opinion, and I hope you liked the story, despite it's flaws! :twilightblush:

honestly this sounds a bit like an HP Lovecraft thing

I honestly really enjoyed this! Lol, it was meant to be funny and you succeeded. enough said! hope you keep at it, and thank you for this! i personally always viewed pinkie as mormon for some reason lmfao

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