What happens when you combine Industrialist Grunge with Equestria? A completely different setting, where trees are sparse but clubs are plentiful. The Elements of Harmony do not act as they normally would; sure, Rainbow Dash is still loyal, Fluttershy still loves, Pinkie Pie is still the creator of laughter, Rarity is still generous, Twilight Sparkle is still the intelligent one and Applejack is still honest. But none of this comes into play in the conventional style. No, this world is a world where it is dangerous to be alone and even more dangerous to go into foreign groups. PinkieShy shipping included.
Chapters (5)
more! can't wait until the next chapter!
Nice!
Fluttershy is really
HAWT
in that picture.....What? 
Seems interesting. Looking forward to more.
cant wait for more
Well that's... original.
I just hope you know where you're leading this.
Tracked.
Thanks all, going to create a new chapter within the next few days for sure! Glad y'all like it :D.
74222
I'll be honest here, I don't know where I'm going to be taking this. Just means more surprises ;D.
I can't wait for the next chapter! By the way I love the cover image.
75168
Thanks, I'm currently starting on Chapter One. Having a bit of a writer's block, though...
I should say that I didn't make the cover image. Not sure who did, but I saw it and knew that it was going to be the premise of my next story (this one).
Is RD a gang leader?
man i like where this is going........ wat next the apple family is the mafia?
75026
A very dangerous move, but Ok.
Still tracked.
75846 Maybe.
75914 Don't see how, but okay.
Glad you all like it so far!
Shit just got real, in a minor way.
TL;DR
certainly an interesting twist on the MLP world so far definitely watching this one
All throughout the chapter, I was telling my computer screen "Silly ponies, don't go to the pClub. If someone said it was a dangerous place you're bound to get into trouble! That's how stories work!"
They still went there, they still got into trouble. My advice was for nothing.
76445
I'm sorry your advice was for nothing!
Such deaf ponies, yes? 
Might put a new chapter up either later tonight or tomorrow! Depends on my schedule and how many ideas I got floating about in my skull.
if you dont do it soon........ well lets just say the boss is going to have a word with you
It seems this story might be postponed... my MSWord decided that it would expire and now I can't copy/paste what I already have into Notepad to finish it. Sorry guys.
Sorry to say, but I won't continue reading this story.
This chapter just killed it for me. More specifically the beginning. Rainbow Dash being head of some big street gang...meh, ok. With what this story was showing before, I guess I can accept that, but the fact that the situation was just shrugged off like that, that's what killed it for me. Just wasn't believable to me. Maybe it's just me, but meh.
I liked the idea, it seemed original and real interesting and clubbing ponies? I'm in. I've seen some grunge and punk pony art around and I really like it so I was happy to see a story that took place in this kind of setting. Good luck with the story :D.
Have a good one.
78603
Sorry to hear that, mate.
But if you think about it, Pinkie and Rainbow Dash are portrayed as best friends almost everywhere, both canon and non-canon. Plus the fact that Pinkie Pie is a generally carefree, forgiving pony by nature, I personally would find a big deal being made due to the situation being less believable.
Thanks!
Have a nice day/life/whatever it is you mention it as.
Dare I suggest a better music?
Yes: Take both home!
chapter 3 was a buzzkill, you couldve done so much more in the way of drama, but they just talk it off in a big happy re-union
couldve done so much more
79169
Like I said in my previous comment, it wouldn't make sense to have drama and conflict between two best friends over something they couldn't control (at the time) because of not knowing.
BAH, wrong emote.
should've been 
.
I believe RD will be a major character in later chapters, thus the introduction. If not, it's really not thought out well.
........ okay i guess but abrupt with waking up
i put that pinkie expression for a reason......
81461
What?
cross my heart and hope to DIE!?!?!? am i missing something?!
I could swear Pinkie would go all Pinkamena like and start making things talk without knowing she was xD
83118
What is there to miss?
83523
Compared to the canon Pinkamena there wouldn't be enough time. Or would there?... It's Pinkie, afterall.
I tried to like this. Honest but I can't get into a PinkieShy shipping. :/ It seemed alright otherwise.
do you have a larger version of your cover image?
159551
Honestly? I'm not sure.
I've been quite busy lately with IRL things, plus there's been a lack of inspiration ever since the Diary piece. 
There is an unfinished Chapter Four, but I'd hate to finish it up and have it ruin what seems to have been going so well.
Maybe if I find that people want me to continue it, I'll attempt to. Been a while though, quite rusty. 
Didnt expect an answer so soon...
What you have here is a good story, with good writing, a good, original concept, and all you need now is to finalize the plot and it will be perfect. Real life things? Sure, take all the time you need, just come back to it if you have a momment and, most importantly, you enjoy writting it.
To continue, you could perhaps go on a journey of sorts around the city, have a run in with the Apple Syndicate, encounter a college student writing a paper on the slums, perhaps even locate a certain...whatever Rarity might be...
This is your story my friend, if you need any ideas on how to continue it, and a plot centralized on finding out what really happened could certainly fit the bill, I will happily attempt to provide imspiration.
159788
Next chapter was going to more insight on the Fluttershy/Rainbow Dash relationship while also introducing Trixie and/or Twilight Sparkle. Pinkie was going to be, for most of the time, left out of the picture.
And please attempt this inspiration. I'd appreciate it. 
I was also hoping it to become, perhaps, a very long story (example: Two's Company, Three's a Crowd) but it doesn't seem to turn out that way.
There wasn't really going to much of a plot (
) just a course of daily & special events. Go figure. 
Meh, I enjoy Two's Company, quite a bit actually, but I feel that the plot in it is rather hashed together and random.
Do you perhaps mean Pinkie Pie/Rainbow Dash relationship?
Twilight and/or Trixie might be interesting to put in, either as a student, or a street or theatre musician.
What I would suggest is having Fluttershy leave at some point during the afternoon, since this is the morning if I remember correctly, while Pinkie is recovering from her hangover. The reasoning could be to get medication, or simply to find some fresh air and clear her head. From there she could encounter Dash, a dealer, a member of the Syndicate if you would approve of such an idea (and perhaps refernce Milo Minderbinder if you wouldnt mind
), or even bump into a certain student.
If you want Dash, you could have her ask "Flutters" to deliver a package to Pinkie, which could lead to some nice conflict. The Apple Syndicate, where everyone owns a share, could be along the lines of a drug cartel, or perhaps bootleggers selling cider. The student could lead to a meeting....wait...WAIT!!!
Bear with me for a momment, Twi/Trixie undercover COPS!!!! What do you think?
Summary: You could have a part of the story, if you temporarily separate the characters, where Pinkie trys to discover what REALLY happened the previous night, and where some sort of conflict arises in which Fluttershy begins to lose faith in her but leads to reconciliation at the end with a nice dose of Dawww....
In the very least, that could be one brief section.
159870
This... strangely wasn't what I was originally thinking at all. AT ALL.
By 'relationship,' I meant... hrm, how do I put this...
Here, I'll pull it up and quote a line or two.
"She was still mildly irritated about her marefriend's actions of last night, but she couldn't stay angry for too long; it wasn't in her nature to be upset. She padded out into their living room, over to their coffee table and snatched the spare key to the front door. I'm just going to go to the coffee shop and have some time alone, she thought. That's all."
So, yeah. Essentially Fluttershy was supposed to find RD at the cafe and then they begin talking after so many years apart (one can never seperate RD/FS and canon Flight School. Never.) and she hesitantly asks RD for her opinion about Pinkie and whether she did it or not, etc.
Ever read the play, "Our Town"? I kind of looked forward to something like that -- no plot, no MAJOR conflict, nothing that constitutes in a normal story. Just.. their lives.
So your issue is trying to find content to fill their lives with? How deeply do you intend to explore their relationship?
159916
I suppose as much.
And, it depends on what you mean -- I intend on keeping it at a PG/T rating, so no sex scenes (no matter how itchingly good they sound right about now), maybe some implications though. Otherwise, I'm not quite sure... probably deep enough to keep it interesting, maybe a few flashbacks/memories. I'm bad with English, you can tell.
Not terribly bad and besides, this is all a part of the improvement process.
Of course I mean PG/T, I am simply wondering if you would be willing to continue along the path of their relationship being threatened, or would prefer to end that here and move on to something else.
159934
I plan on them having a couple different hardships, or at least I did. Sometimes there would be doubt... paranoia... anxiety (Psychoshy + Pinkamena Diane Pie = Celestia help us all)... other times it'd bring them closer together or just be plain ol' comical. Planned on having this one maybe extend a few chapters, with the only real signs of doubt/distrust being in Fluttershy's Diary (so, a hidden paranoia).