Regret
Celestia’s office was dark, having closed all the blinds in an attempt to cut out the outside world. Well, as much as she could in a busy school. The only sound permeating the still air was the subtle beeping of her phone, which was laying haphazardly on her desk. Papers and folders that had once been neat and organized now lay in a heap on the floor and the many family pictures that had been arranged with great care were pushed aside. Occasionally the inane dial tone was joined by a harsh sob as the morning's events replayed over and over again in her mind. How Sunsets face contorted with the fury she so readily expressed. She had made it perfectly clear. She was not her mother. Another bout of grief washed over her, and she buried her head even deeper in her arms, least she draws the attention of her secretary. She had listened to her sister, the only person in the world who understood her, or so she thought. The mere idea that she could once again be a mother, only to watch her walk away was enough to drive her back into the deepest depths of despair. An endless pit that she worked so hard to climb out of in the past.
“Celly?” Luna’s voice was muffled through the heavy office door. “Come on, Celestia! You've been in there for hours; I’ve had to talk to three angry parents because your phone is busy. Please open the door, I'm worried about you.” Her volume started off strong but buy the time she finished her plea; it was barely more than a loud whisper that Celestia had to strain to hear. Celestia knew that she was neglecting her duties as Principal but at that moment she didn't care. Soon her sister’s voice was joined with incessant knocking, which lasted a full minute before she heaved an exasperated sigh. “I’m coming in. You really need to stop locking yourself in here.” Mercifully, the knocking ceased only to be replaced by the metallic jingling of keys and creaking of door hinges. The darkened room was briefly bathed in light as the newcomer stepped inside. “Oh, Celly.” Luna sighed and Celestia chanced a peek at the younger woman, lifting her head ever so slightly, Luna was reminded of an alligator poking its head out of the water for air. Luna studied her, cyan eyes brimming with worry and apprehension as she crossed her arms across her chest, cocking her head to the side while gently biting down on her bottom lip. She tried to think of something that could ease her sister's suffering but knew nothing would work.
“Go away.” Celestia managed feebly, interrupting her sister’s internal struggle. They both winced at the waver in her voice. Not at all the commanding yet caring persona she worked so hard to achieve, something Luna had always been jealous of.
“I take it that your chat didn’t go well?” Luna finally managed and instantly regretted it, clenching her eyes shut she waited for the tirade. Celestia sat up fully to properly glare at her sister through lidded eyes. Luna poorly contained a gasp at the state of the usually composed woman. Eyes swollen and her face splotched and red. Pastel hair plastered to cheeks, mixing with the ruined makeup outlining exactly where her tears ran. If head been years since Luna had seen her such a state.
“It was a disaster. And it’s your fault.” Her throat felt as though she swallowed sandpaper and her eyes stung. She silently willed her head to stop pounding as she brought shaking hands to her temples, massaging none too gently as she clenched her eyes shut. Wishing her sister would just leave her alone. But her wish had been in vain, when she opened her eyes once more not only was Luna still there the younger woman’s eyes were crinkled with confusion and her mouth dipped into an apprehensive frown. Celestia’s desk creaked as Luna propped her hip on a corner, her sister so close that she could practically count the individual strands of her indigo hair. She took a shuddering breath, willing herself to calm down.
“How is this my fault?” Luna’s voice an octave higher than usual, a tell-tale sign of her disbelief and mild annoyance. “I didn't force you to talk to her, it was your decision.” The sound of a fist hitting the desk startled her slightly and she was certain the carpet tore under the sheer force that Celestia shoved back her chair. Standing so she towered over the smaller woman.
“You…you talked me into it!” Celestia rasped, raising a shaking finger, and brandishing it at her sister. Luna recoiled, bracing herself for the possible impact of Celestia’s hand. Making a strangled sound, as though all the air had been suddenly knocked out of her, she sunk back down into the discarded chair, turning to stare intently at her sister, making the youngest woman squirm. Heavy silence washed over the pair as they studied each other. Celestia with apprehension and Luna with concern.
“I-I didn’t mean to upset you.” Luna started, her voice barley more than a whisper. Her sisters chair creaking as she moved forward to properly hear her words. Suddenly her nerves were joined by fear, she wrapped her arms around herself and unconsciously licked her lips. “I just wanted you to be happy, Celly. You could have another chance.” A laugh so bitter that Luna would never have believed it came from her usually cheerful sister.
Celestia’s face twisted and her magenta eyes hardened with something Luna had never seen before. “I let my baby die. I don’t deserve a second chance.” An icy blast washed over her as Luna stared at her sister in shock. She knew she still grieved for her niece, but she had no idea that Celestia still held herself responsible. Years of therapy was supposed to have cured that.
“Celly...” Her voice broke and her eyes stung at the sheer amount of despair oozing out of her sister, her best friend.
“No, Luna. You want me to pretend like nothing happened, like this Sunset is the same as my Sunny. But she made it perfectly clear, I am not her mother. Nor could I ever hope to be. It isn’t fair to either of us to keep fueling false hope.” Celestia stood once more, anxiousness getting the better of her as she began to pace. Avoiding looking at her sister and the familiar guilt at making the younger woman cry.
“What happened? What did Sunset say?” Celestia stumbled, she swore lightly as the desk vibrated from the impact with her knee, not at all wishing to relive her truly hellish morning. “Please, Celly?” Luna practically pleaded as she scooted farther into the center of the desk, bringing her feet up onto the safety of the polished wood as her sister circled around her like a hungry shark hunting for prey.
“What didn’t happen?” She paused, running her hands over her face, fighting her emotions to stay in check. Yelling at get sister would do nothing but make the situation worse. “She-she didn’t know about the… other me.” A hesitant sigh sounded as her shoulders drooped, her head along with them. “She didn’t know that the other me is her mother. And the teacher that drove her through the portal, is the same person.” Celestia’s hands fell to her sides lethargically and for a moment Luna worried that the emotional stress had been too much. But Celestia turned to face her companion. “She gave her up twice!” She growled, wanting nothing more than to storm through the portal and deal with the princess herself. “How could she do that? How could she give her away and then practically banish her once she got a second chance?” Her question hung in the air as Luna shimmied off the desktop and hurried across the spacious office to her sister, the forgotten files and strewn papers crinkling under her feet as she moved. The sleeves of Celestia’s blouse were still wet with the remnants of her earlier tears as Luna gripped her arms before pulling her big sister into a hug.
“I am so sorry, Celly. I know how hard this is for you.” Luna soothed as she stroked her sisters back lovingly, smiling slightly when she felt the familiar weight of her sister's head drop on her shoulder.
“Why would she get rid of her?” The words were muffled but the exhaustion and anguish were clear as day. Luna tightened her embrace, gently rocking her older sister back and forth. Much like she used to after the accident. A light flashed inside her head and she was filled with a sudden warmth, grinning almost manically into the pastel locks.
“Just as you said, it's not fair. Sunset deserves a chance at a real family. One that genuinely loves her and welcomes her without question.” Confidence radiated from her as she drew away from her sister. “Just listen for a moment.” Celestia was silent as she regarded her sister with wide eyes, if was not like Luna to be this exuberant about something. “We never found Sunny’s body.” Celestia’s eyes narrowed and her nostrils flared dangerously, her hands curling into fists at her sides. “We could say that she washed up on shore downstream and some backwoods people took her in! Sunset could theoretically make use of Sunny’s documents, giving her a real family at the same time!” Luna beamed at her sister, not seeming to be fazed by the disappointment blooming across Celestia’s face. The older woman shaking her head incredulously, shoving Luna away from her instinctively.
“For being a certified genius, you can be rather dense.” Celestia lashed. “Have you not been listening to me? Do you truly not understand or acknowledge what this entire situation is doing to me? What this would do to Sunset? If you keep pushing this? You need to start considering other people’s feelings, Luna! We are not just some lab rats in one of your experiments!" Luna’s eyes widened as her sister stumbled her way back to her desk, wrenching open the bottom drawer and fumbling for her bag. “She is a teenage girl that has never known the love of a family and I refuse to coerce her or threaten her into pretending to be my long-lost daughter!” Celestia seethed as she struggled to stuff her belongings into her purse, not bothering to look up at her sister. “You can’t just take advantage of a child for your own whims!” Her voice trembled as every fiber of her being screamed at her to leave, to put as much space between her sister and herself. Luna watched Celestia pack her things in a state of mild shock. The last time she had truly raised her voice at her was when they were children.
“Then what will you do about Sunset?” Celestia flinched at the fluctuation in her voice, Luna had never been able to handle emotions well.
“I-I’ll think of something.” Celestia answered, her voice strained, trying in vain to stop the next volley of tears threatening to fall. “Don't hurry home.” Celestia grumbled as she trudged to the office door, praying that Luna would just leave it be for once. Only to be knocked backwards by her sister flinging herself in front of the door.
“No! You cannot just give up! You’ve never given up before! You said it yourself, Sunset’s never had a family, what if…what if we just offer her a place to stay? At least over Christmas break? Then she can decide for herself if she wants to stay with us. Come on, Celly! I’ve seen you bend over backwards for your students; you are a wonderful teacher and you are an amazing mother. She needs you but she just doesn’t know it yet.” Luna implored as she blockaded the door, using all her body weight to stop her sister from reaching the doorknob.
“No, Luna. I will make sure she’s taken care of, but I will not put that kind of pressure on her.” With a grunt and some maneuvers from her time playing field hockey, she managed to dislodge Luna and force her way out into the reception area of the Canterlot High administration office. Leaving a fatigued and truly panicked Luna in her wake.
###
Twilight Sparkle was a relative newcomer to Canterlot High, having only been officially enrolled for one semester. While she was new to the whole friendship thing, even she knew that this was not normal. Her best friend, the one who saved her from Midnight Sparkle and subsequently her only true confidant had worked herself into a well contained rage and Twilight was at a complete loss. Having no real idea how she came to be sitting on the bathroom floor, awkwardly watching Sunset stalk the short expanse of the bathroom. The subtle clacking from the heels of her boots echoing off the tiled walls. Crinkling her eyebrows, Twilight could not make out what her friend was muttering, but she knew it had to be important if Sunset skipped lunch with her friends, preferring to hide out in the least used and dingiest bathroom in the school.
“Sunset? I can’t understand you, please calm down?” Twilight attempted to draw her friend out of her muttering, watching helplessly as Sunset brandished her arms wildly. Drawing her knees to her chest she silently regretted having to use the bathroom at that precise moment, causing her to stumble across Sunset.
“How could she… can’t be true…. Lying …” Paling slightly as she glanced at her watch, Twilight hurried to her feet, pausing only long enough to wash her hands after sitting on the dusty floor.
“Sunset!” She yelled sharply; purple fists perched on her hips as she used her best stern voice. Sunset stopped, turning to look at Twilight, her eyebrows raised slightly as she gaped at the smaller girl.
“Twi? When did you get here?” Sunset seemed to fold in on herself, wrapping her arms around her torso and her eyes immediately downcast. Her cheeks reddening considerably as embarrassment filled her.
“About ten minutes ago. You didn’t seem to notice, what’s wrong? I’ve never seen you like this before.” Twilight stepped forward, extending a hand to place on Sunsets shoulder, only to have the redhead jerk away from her. Still not making eye contact Sunset backed up, putting as much distance between them as possible in the cramped room.
“I-Its nothing. I’m fine! Really…” Sunset replied as her friend regarded her with a raised eyebrow. Disbelief etched on her face, looking much like an exasperated librarian. “It’s nothing, Twilight. Don’t worry about it.”
“I may not be particularly good with friendships or people in general, but even I can tell that something is bothering you. If you won't talk to me maybe one of the other girls?” Twilight suggested, truly having no idea on how to comfort her first true friend. Sunset shuffled her feet, watching as the slightly scuffed boot toe scraped at the tile floor. Biting her bottom lip, she once again shook her head.
“I can’t.” She whispered, guilt and anxiety clear in her words. Twilight pursed her lips but eventually nodded her acceptance. She cannot make Sunset talk to her, but she can be there for her if she were to change her mind.
“Alright, I don’t understand it, but I will respect your wishes. If you change your mind…” Momentary relief flooded Sunset as she released a breath, she hadn’t realized she was holding, lifting her head once more and dropping her arms back down to her sides.
“I know, Twilight. Thanks, really.” Sunset shot a hollow smile at her friend which did nothing to quell Twilights apprehension. “Class is getting ready to start, you don’t want to be late.” Sunset reminded her if anything to get Twilight to break her unwavering gaze. After a few more moments of awkward silence, Twilight gave a slight nod, securing her backpack over both shoulders and moving towards the exit.
“Are you coming?” Sunsets smile faltered and Twilight’s brow once again crinkled with disproval. “Will I at least see you after school?” Sunset knew that she would only be bombarded by the rest of their little group if she stayed for band practice and the implications of that conversation made her stomach knot.
“I have to go home early…homework and stuff.” Sunset prayed that Twilight would just leave her be. But just as Twilights hand closed over the handle to the bathroom, she turned back. Looking at her appraisingly, purple eyes filled with obvious doubt. “It’s okay, Twilight. I just have some stuff that I need to work out on my own. I'll talk to you as soon as I’m ready, please don't push me.” Sunset urged, nearly pushing the girl out of the bathroom. Twilight looked doubtful but gave Sunset a sad smile that did not quite reach her eyes.
“Will you at least talk to your Mom about what’s wrong? I know that school can be hard, especially with what we have done. If people are giving you a hard time about the fall formal, your parents can help. I know mine did.” Sunset gave a jerky nod, she did not notice when Twilight left the bathroom, time seemed to stop, and her ears filled with loud buzzing.
Sunset’s heart pounded in her chest as she struggled to breath, stumbling to the farthest corner of the room she sunk to the floor, hugging her legs tightly to her chest. Angry tears soaked into the worn denim of her pants as memories of the Princess came rushing back, accompanied by the old feelings of abandonment and self-admonishment. I was never good enough for the Princess, how could I possibly be good enough for this Celestia? Especially after the fall formal. Sunset thought to herself, burying her face into her knees as her insecurities finally came pouring out after years of bottling everything up. I don’t deserve a second chance. Sunset suppressed a sob, wishing everything would just go back to normal.
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Poor Sunny.
Below are some typos for your editing pleasure:
Celestia had to stain to hear. - Celestia had to strain to hear.
seen her such a state. - seen her in such a state.
but make edge situation worse. - but make the situation worse.
considering the people’s feelings - considering people’s feelings - or - considering other people’s feelings
just leave get be for once. - just leave it be for once. - or - just leave things be for once.
You never given up before! - You've never given up before!
yourself, Sunsets never - yourself, Sunset's never
I'll talk to though as soon - I'll talk to you as soon
push me.” Sunset urged, - push me,” Sunset urged,
suppressed and sob - suppressed a sob
Oof, I know Luna was just trying to help but she pressed all the buttons... in the wrong order. I AM curious to see how the reconciliation between Sunset and Principle! Celestia go, like, how will they meet up to start their next conversation? Will one of them approach the other or will Luna try and corral them into position? Also, that last line of Twilights... ouch. Though that does pose the question, now that her friends know that she originally came from another dimension why haven't they put it together that she's all on her own? I mean, I get why it is never brought up in the show/movies, but most fanfics try to portray the setting in a more realistic manner.
Aww... Sunset.
Not the best advice right now Twilight. Not sure how you don't know Sunset lives alone after a full semester, but ok.
Also, they never found human Sunset's body eh? I'm sure that will not be relevant at any point going forward.
Probably meant "It had" instead of "If head" which is kind of funnier but yeah. It'll be interesting where things go from here. Xbox432 said it best, Luna's pushing all the buttons in the wrong order for this situation. Probably playing DDR while dancing like Twilight.
Seen a few stories as Princess Celestia as Sunset's mother. I'd say Celestia feared Sunset would be a target... that or she's busy ruling Equestria she'd have no time for her... I wonder what Princess Twilight would think of Sunset's dilemma =o or the fact that Celestia possibly had a foal and didn't raise it herself. Hopefully Vice Principal Luna sees that this Sunset is not just a replacement for 'Sunny.' Once Sunset understands she's not just a copy, maybe they could use that backstory for where she comes from, due to government peoples. Hope to see more soon!
Damn it Twi shouldn’t you be smart enough to guess the inter dimensional unicorn doesn’t have access to family?
Great Chapter. People have already pointed out the typos. Other than that, you're doing great. This chapter almost made me cry. The original show and the Equestria Girls franchise never gave Celestia any character. She was just there. Which is why a lot people think that she's "Too perfect." But I'm glad that fan fiction writers like you are giving her some character.
Light, I feel for both Sunny and Celestia. For Celly, seeing Sunset every day must have been torture, and from the look of it, Sunset's whole world just got turned upside down and shaken like a maraca.
Celestia and Sunset are both really hurting from this.
Ouch. Even unintentionally that "talk to our Mom" comment hurt.
Good story so far, reminds me of Andrizzi's Other, will follow with interest.
Always love it when your two main characters are to blinded by emotions to just sit down and talk
Loving it
Ouch so much emotion
Some interesting stuff going on here.
One thing on formatting. You need to start a new paragraph with each line of dialogue, unless it's a continuation of the same line. Especially if you have another character doing something before the first character's next line. Near the end of this chapter, the way it's formatted makes it difficult to tell whether it's Sunset or Twilight talking. Example below:
this story is very very good please update soon
Luna's reaction to Celestia points to stone sort of relationship abuse sometime in her life. To flinch from her sister raising her hand expecting to be hit is NOT normal. Celestia didn't apologise, so either she finds it normal (extremely disturbing as it would point for her being the one responsible) or she didn't notice - which is very unlikely, considering she's the older sister.
Interesting story, curious to see how it'll progress, but that's a worrying signal for a possible darker turn.
Please tell me your updating soon!!
This is absolutely heartbreaking.
Can't wait for the next chapter.
I need more this story is amazing and I do hope for princess celestia to get confronted
10323756
The story said they never found the body, so I am 100% assuming this world's Sunset is alive and had a similar situation to Sunset. Sans the crossing worlds and stuff.
10317344
Theres a story in the momlestia and sunset folder where she just kept her hidden from the public. It wouldn't have been hard to call her "her faithful student" which would automatically make up for the time spent in the castle, and considering how loyal some of her cabinet is in kibitz and raven, you wouldn't have to worry about her being kept hidden and being found out for a while.
10317344
Also, yes they are severed forever. We already know that Sunset is technically well into adulthood in Equestria, it's far too late to be a mother on the Princesses end. As another commenter said, making Sunset her student was likely Celstia trying to have her cake and eat it too.
Oh god more please continue this🙏🥺
First of all, great story.
I too wrote a story where Celestia is Sunset's mother, but I have to admit that your characterization of they are far better than mine, you did an amazing job describing Sunset and principal Celestia's feelings and reactions, congrats.
I hope you continue this story soon, so I can read and steal your ideas.
But seriously, you have a really good premise, would be a shame if we can't see how Sunset will deal with this revelation, how her relationship with both Celestias would develop. Will she forgive the princess? Or will she 'abandon' the princess and accept to be the principal's daughter?
F
A truly well done opening. I wish we had gotten more. Sunset and Celestia deserve some happiness.