Noir Spiderman: A Van Helsing Story.

by Adamverse

New Assignment

Canterlot was a long ride away, Spiderman had to cross much land to return ‘home’; but when he arrived, his welcome wasn’t that warm.

The hunter walked inside a large church, the home place of the followers of Celestia; the most secrete place on Earth. Spiderman walked towards the place where people would come to confess their sins and beg forgiveness, hoping to meet with his ‘boss’.

He stepped inside the small compartment and closed the door behind him; he removed his hat and mask before speaking, “Bless me Father, for I have si…”

He was cut off with, “Sinned, yes; your very good at that.”

The Arch Bishop revealed himself, and he wasn’t happy with what happened in Las Pegasus; “You shattered a stain glass window, Adam.”

“I was being dragged around, it was Mr Lizard who did the shattering.” Adam explained.

“A secrete glass window, over six hundred years old.” The bishop then sighed. “You do well to get the job done, but your methods attract too much attention. You have made a name for yourself, Adam; or should I say, Spiderman?”

Adam groaned because he was being yelled at, “You think I like being the most wanted man in the land, Sunburst? Why don’t you and the order do something about?”

Bishop Sunburst came closer to him and whispered, “Because we do not exist.”

“Well then neither do I.”

Just as Spiderman was about to walk away, Sunburst flipped a switch, shutting an iron gate; trapping Adam in the compartment. “When we found you crawling up the steps of this church, half dead; it was clear to all of us, you had been sent to do Celestia’s work.”

“Why can’t she do it herself?”

“The goddess works in mysterious ways.” The bishop flipped another switch which opened a secret door behind him, and another leading to the compartment Adam was in. “You already lost your memory as pension for past sins; if you wish to recover it, you should follow her will.”

The two of them walked down to a secret base of operation underneath the church, where they continued the discussion.

“We are the last line of defence against evil, protecting those from a threat they do not even know is there.” The room they were in was filled with; blacksmiths, engineers and people crafting devises and weapons used to fight the darkness. “We defeat the creatures that man has written off as silly legends.”

“By creatures, you mean monsters.” Adam sighed at the thought of the things he’s done, and why the people have branded him a murderer. “Look, I’m the one standing there when they die, when they become the men they once were; and ever since, the people have been demanding my head.”

Bishop Sunburst placed his hand on his friend’s shoulder, “All I can do is offer you this small piece of advice.” Adam was listening, “Don’t get caught.” Spiderman smirked at his comment, then listened to what else he had to say.

“And now, we need you to go to the east; the land known as Tramplevania. A land terrorised by all sorts of the nightmare-ish creatures; all of them coordinated and controlled by a certain, Count Morbius.”

“Morbius?”

Sunburst chuckled a little, “Yes, you’ve never faced one like this before.”

Sunburst had turned on a projector, showing images of Tramplevania and Count Morbius. “Our story begins four hundred years ago; with a Tramplevanian knight named, Alcester Vladimir. He vowed on these holy grounds, his family would never rest, nor enter heaven, until the vanquished Morbius from their land. They have not succeeded, and they are running out of family.”

Adam listened to the full story, before making a conclusion.

Sunburst continued, “His descendent, Night Light, King of the Gypsies; he disappeared almost twelve months ago. His son, Prince Shining Armour and his daughter, Princess Twilight Sparkle; if the two of them are killed before Morbius is vanquished, nine generations will never enter the gates of Equestria.”

“We owe them so much, they gave their lives to keep Morbius and his minions at bay for so long.” Sunburst then turned to a man who had brought him a stroll, the man bowed when he gave it to the bishop, then continued with his work. “Alcester left this here four hundred years ago.”

Adam and Sunburst laid the scroll out on the table, when it was unravelled, Sunburst read it out. “The Latin inscription tells us, ‘In the name of Celestia, open this door.’ And there’s an insignia.”

When Adam was shown the picture, he took his glove off to reveal the ring he was wearing. The insignia was identical to the one on his ring; Sunburst stated, “I believe in Tramplevania, you may find the answers you are looking for.

Spiderman knew his mission, but he needed to get a few things first; he knew just the guy to get them from. He took the scroll and wandered into the crowd of craftsmen and workers, looking for one guy in particular.

---

“Faster please; faster, faster, faster.” The man on the device pedalled as fast as he could, until…

A wire came loose and electrocuted him with fifty volts of electricity; when he fell of the device, the one telling him to go faster said, “Okay getting there.”

A man on the floor was able to mutter, “Spike, you idiot.”

The engineer turned away from that man and saw his friend coming to greet him, Adam wandered down the stairs looking for his go to guy.

“Ah, there you are.” He greeted. “So, did you bring Mr Lizard back, or did you kill him?” Adam said nothing, then Spike sighed. “You killed him didn’t you; when they ask you to bring someone back, they don’t mean as a corpse.”

Adam grunted as the two of them made their way to Spike’s work bench, “Alright, you’re in a mood.” But they stopped when Adam started admiring the swords, Spike commented, “Oh any idiot can make a sword.”

“Hey.” Said the blacksmith, when he heard the comment.

“Sorry, Bicep.”

“Come along, Spike.” Adam said as he pushed his friend along.

Spike already knew what Spiderman was going up against next, so he already had some things for the hunter to take with him. “Here, take this.” Spike said, handing his friend a bag; then he started giving him things to fight these creatures.

“Rings of garlic, holy water.” He pulled something else out of the drawer, pushed a button on its side, a pike blade shot out. “Silver stake. Sun Pendent…”

Spike however gasped when he heard the sound of a new weapon being test fired behind him; one that could shoot bullets rapidly.

“Why can’t I have one of those?” Adam asked.

Spike looked him and sighed, “You’ve never gone after vampires before, have you?”

Adam chuckled, “Vampires, Warlocks, Goblins; their all the same.”

“No they are not, a vampire is nothing like a goblin; my granny could kill a goblin and she was half blind.”

“You’ve never been out in the field, how’d you know about vampires?” Adam asked.

“I read.” Spike then brought Adam over to something good, “Behold, liquid thermite.” He took a dropped of the substance and flicked it on the ground; causing an explosion. It knocked everything and made everyone gasp.

“Sorry, sorry, sorry.” Spike apologised; he turned back to Spiderman, “The air around here is thick.”

Adam got tired of him just messing, so he wandered towards something else; Spike saw what he was eyeing and explained, “This is my latest invention; its gas propelled, cable of catapulting arrows at mile radius. Simply pull the trigger and hold on.”

“What’s that?”

Adam grabbed a small grenade like device, filled with some kind of yellow liquid. Spike objected to him playing with, “That I’ve been working on for twelve years.” Spike tried to snatch it but Adam was messing with him.

When Spike finally grabbed it, Adam asked, “What’s it for?”

“I don’t know.” Spike replied.

“Twelve years and you don’t know what it does?”

Spike placed it in a box and held it in his hand, “I didn’t say that, I said I didn’t know what it’s for. What it does is generate a light wave capable of matching the density of the sun.”

“How would that be useful?”

“I don’t know; you could blind your enemy for a few minutes, you could light up a dark cave while looking for a target. Use your imagination.”

Adam took the box and placed it in his bag, “I don’t need to, I’m going to use yours, that’s why you’re coming with me.”

“Holy hell, I am.”

Adam was shocked, then said, “You cursed? Begging your pardon sir, but you’re a monk, you shouldn’t curse at all.”

Spike felt a little cocky and replied, , “Well actually, I’m just a friar; I can curse all I want.” He then smiled and said, “Damn it.”

Adam swung the bag over his shoulder, then explained, “The order has ordered that you keep me alive, I’ll to do the same for you. For as long as possible.” The hunter then wandered towards the exit.

Spike tried to protest, “But I’m not a field guy.” He chased after his friend. “Adam, I don’t want to go to Tramplevania.”

---

Tramplevania, home to Prince Shining Armour and his little sister; today was the day the captured and killed the monster that terrorised their forests. The Were-Wolf; one of Morbius’ loyal minions.

To trap this beast, the prince volunteered to be the bait.

Deep within the centre of the woods, Shining Armour waited for the beast, his hands tied above his head; tied to a beam of wood lodged into the dirt ground. He waited and waited, Morbius’ Were-Wolfs had been trained to smell the blood of the prince’s family.

Shining Armour heard a twig snap in the distance and turned his attention to that direction; he stared into the heart of the bushes in front of him.

“Come on. Morbius unleashed you for a reason.”

Suddenly, for the shadows, a wolf monster pounced out of the bushes and leaped towards Shining Armour. The prince moved quickly, using the ropes the tied him to the post to pull himself to the top; he balanced on the bean until he jumped up and grabbed a rope disguised as a vine.

Someone hiding behind the trees pulled a lever to pull the rope the prince held onto up; until something got caught in the pully-system. The Were-Wolf tried to climb up the post and bite of his legs.

“Pull me up; up!” Shiny’ shouted.

The man pulled cried, “It’s stuck; you’re stuck.”

However, leaping out from behind the trees and drawing her sword, the princess wanted to help her brother. But one man tried to stop her.

“No, Twilight; it’ll kill you.” He said.

She wacked his hand away and stated, “That’s my brother up there.”

Twilight Sparkle charged at the Were-Wolf, attempting to stab it in the back; until the original plan was pull into action.

The monster stepped closer to the wooden post, and it fell into the trap; a steel cage was lifted out of the ground with the beast inside. Shining pulled out a gun and tried to shoot it, but the top of the cage closed; he was knocked off the rope and lost his gun, luckily he landed on a tree branch.

The men the prince and princess had brought with them began shooting their muskets at the cage, hoping one shot will kill the thing inside.

As they were shooting, no one heard the prince shout, “My gun, find my gun!”

Twilight pushed past the men and said, “Find Shiny’s gun, it has the silver bullets.”

Just before Twilight could find the gun, one man accidently shot at the ropes, dropping the cage; it just missed the princess when it hit the ground, but the Were-Wolf was let out.

“Run!” Twilight cried.

The men started running away, but the monster started chasing Twilight.

Shining Armour jumped down from the tree, found his gun and ran after his sister.

Twilight was chased all the way to the cliffs, which led down to the river; she turned and saw the Were-Wolf about to get her.

Just before the monster get her; Shining Armour sprung out of nowhere, pushed his sister out of the way and shot a silver bullet into the chest of the beast. The Were-Wolf might have been shot, but it pushed the prince and itself of the cliff and into the river.

Shiny screamed as them plummeted to the water, Twilight looked over the cliff but it was too late; her brother was gone.

She stood up and looked to the skies, “Shiny. Celestia help us.”