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Scampy


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This story is a sequel to Day Zero


Wallflower knows she doesn't deserve all the patience, understanding and compassion Sunset gives her. If only Sunset understood that too.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 21 )

Ooo it's so good to see Wallflower putting in that effort! And that supportive Sunset is someone that everyone should have. So bitter and so sweet~

Nice work, Scamp!

Oh and also,

Fuck it.

Ah yes, a phrase spoken with confidence that really can go either way.

Is snuggle scene next? :rainbowlaugh:

beautifully written and perfectly done. Wallflower's confusion at her own actions and the way she blames herself really hits hard, and I absolutely love how Sunset reacts. Not with shock or shame or anger, but with supportive kindness. There isn't even a second of blame, just pride that she made it a certain distance.

10/10

Oh Wallflower. I'm proud of her for calling Sunset and asking for help. Sometimes, that's the hardest thing to do. I sure as fire know that I have a hard enough time asking for it.

Anybody else minorly annoyed these are coming in tiny separate stories you have to trace back instead of chapters?

Although I cannot relate with the addictive pleasure of self-harming, if I substitute self-harm for other addictive behaviors, I find this very heartwarming and hitting close to home. Having a kind person to support you through an addiction can be vital.

Also, I actually have an orange cartridge with double-edged razor blades in them. (Probably the same brand as Wally.) I shave with those because they give you a closer shave and they're cheaper than Gillette cartridges.

10450759 Not really. It would work fine as an anthology, with the “Anthology” tag, but this isn’t much of a bother.

Sunset is the friend we all deserve. It's so good to see Wallflower remember that she can't trust the depression to see things clearly, so she calls on Sunset to trust her instead. That's courageous and strong on Wallflower's part, and you wrote it very well.

Sunset here reminds me of a psychologist I heard some years ago saying that when people who are struggling with depression, self-harm, and suicide come to him, they're the ones who are being brave - he's just there to help them make the most of their bravery. To help them see the good in themselves that they have a hard time seeing without help.

Sometimes we all need help. We have the right to ask for it. The voice that tells you you don't deserve help or can't be helped is a liar and doesn't deserve your time. Let people help you shut him up.

Depression, self-harm, even suicidal thoughts can and do become addictive - there's a reason they call it an illness. When you're in that state, it's easy for the lying voice to be loud. That's why we reach out to people who people who can help us heal. Like battling any illness, it can take time and care, but I promise you that you're worth it.

Your life matters, and the world will be emptier and darker if you are gone. Even if by some twist of fate no one noticed (and it's almost certain someone would know and care), there would still be a phantom pain - an absence that no one would know the source of, but would be felt all the same. We would be diminished by the loss of you. If that wasn't true, then why is it that people willingly choose to spend their days professionally helping complete strangers to realize their own self worth? That's what suicide hotlines are, after all - strangers helping strangers to battle the lies that are hurting them.

You matter. Whenever you have a hard time remembering that, please talk to someone who can remind you of your worth.

Suicide Hotline: https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org, 1-800-273-8255
List of International Suicide Hotlines (in case you're not in the US): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines

This is excellent, through and through – quite possibly my favourite entry in this pseudo-anthology. Everything said about Bad Habits and Day Zero applies here: You don’t pull your punches, you convincingly deliver a bleak emotional state, and just personally, I see a worrying amount of myself in some of Wallflower’s emotions and behaviours.

Yet there’s another layer here. You delve into the addictive nature of self-harm; as you aptly put it, the mentality of “fuck it” lurking behind. It never comes across as justified, or excused, and absolutely never romanticised, but… reading through Wallflower’s mental state, it makes sense. Because fuck it, right?

The rigid tenseness in her body lessened with every exhale as she stared at the wound

Like here. This hurt to read because it’s such a perfect, terrifying example of how it works. Because it’s a horrible thing to say, right? It’s ugly and messed up and Bad™ and disturbing and…

And it’s the truth.

You write Sunset beautifully as well, as someone who’s truly empathetic rather than just superficially concerned. Her introduction weaving from casual greeting to compassion is seamless – a neat way of showing both that Sunset understands Wallflower’s self-harm more than most, and that this isn’t the first time they’ve talked.

Their dynamic is fantastic as well, and honestly is a lesson to anyone who wants to approach the topic seriously and genuinely. Sunset says all the right things, is calm and understanding, never pushes, never judges. But even then, this toxic little part of Wallflower’s mind wants to reject it. In turn, Sunset accepts and… she works through it, instead of fighting against it. And when they finally see each other face-to-face, it’s so, so cathartic.

I’m drained after reading this. From brutal, uncomfortable realism, to self-doubt in seeking help, to unabashed compassion and release, all in two thousand words.

Bloody hell.

Wally took a big step in calling Sunset this time. That's a good thing.

The imagery in these stories never fails to make my flesh crawl.

10453602
Me and my bloated ego choose to take this as a compliment 🙏

10453910
Good. It was intended as such.

Reading over this story, I can't help but contemplate certain things.

If what Wallflower is going through is truly an addiction, could she benefit more from Sunset not trying to stop her outright, but with a more gradual tapering off approach? Like giving her permission to make one cut after a five day period? Here she says she can't even make it four days without going back to cutting herself. But if she believed she could do it if she simply waited a little longer in between, almost like it's a reward for delayed gratification? Could looking forward to it be used to help her go for longer and longer stretches in between?

Sometimes all it takes is a friend.

This series is just... amazing. Like I mentioned in another comment, I'm not affected by a lot of what I read anymore. But all of these stories are just so raw and emotionally honest that I can't help but feel so much for Wally. I just want to wrap her in a blanket, make her a cup of hot chocolate, and tell her it's gonna be okay.

Sunset is so perfect in this. Offering to take the blades with her instead of just throwing them away shows that she's starting to really understand how deep this runs. She also pretty obviously chooses her words, and I'd like to say she mostly chooses the right ones.

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Dang, Sunset makes me feel better about myself and my struggles with my various problems and and I'm not even in the story.

Even though the narrative is claiming they don’t hurt so much for her, I still flinched at every cut, and deeply at the deep one. I felt the sense of perverse relief, too, though I have no equivalent experiences to draw on. Again, you communicate sensations really well.

That Sunset. That steadiness, patience, and love, all through a disembodied voice on a telephone line. I am so happy for Wally that she is in her life.

I’m proud of Wally, too, and not just for finally asking for help despite her fears and doubts. She can’t understand why Sunset wants to be there for her, or see that she isn’t undeserving of it, but she accepts it as something that just is. I hope the understanding will come in time, but even if it doesn’t, Sunset will still be there for her.

That last moment was so beautiful. Thank you for ending it on a happy note this time, it was very nice to see.

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