• Member Since 17th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen Dec 27th, 2019


Just write and work everything else out later.


Cancelled, but preserved for posterity.

Archer is not having a good day. He's recently been knocked unconscious and imprisoned by a Fae race, notorious for their animosity towards humans and each other. Instead of cannibalistic Merfolk or mischievous Fairies, he finds... talking ponies. Who want him to be their "friend."

He is sentenced to remain in a small town they call "Eqshana", until he can learn to "live in harmony" with its inhabitants. Unfortunately, a message from his king, Jove V, has turned his prison sentence into a mission of espionage. Now he must escape these no-doubt insidious creatures, and even more importantly, stay sane doing it. Along the way, he will answer one of the most important questions he has ever faced: Is there really nothing to eat around here besides hay?

Chapters (27)
Comments ( 530 )

Interesting concept. A huma from a fantasy like world on Equestria. Tracking.

i'm diggin it... will be tracking

:moustache: Oh dear, was it something I said? :moustache:

Great start, I am still chuckling.

Great Story!
"Let the manliest girl screams" :rainbowkiss::rainbowkiss:
You have earned my track!

Huh........Better than my story..........I feel jealous....(Tracking story.)

Am I dating myself when I admit that I imagined the Mirror System operator speaking in Lily Tomlin's voice?

Anyway. Interesting story, I'm going to give it a follow and see where it goes!

Well done, bro. This is a gem of a story, with a superb blend of comedy and serious story-telling. Everypony is kept in character and there are lots of cool little connections you make throughout.

One of those few instant five-star stories, and even rarer instant faves. :pinkiehappy:

Hah, a Human-Equestiran confilct,and this time we dong have guns or such

Thanks very much, everyone! I greatly appreciate the feedback, as well as every single one of this story's followers.

There's a new chapter coming down the pipes, to be put up by tomorrow night. Stay tuned! :pinkiehappy:

Guess we know what comes next!
Archer gets discovered by someone who reads English and the sentence gets worse, and possibly initiates a Human-Equestrian conflict
Friggen troll-kings:trollestia::trollestia::trollestia:

So now we have Princess Trollestia and King Jerkve. These two will get along swimmingly.:ajbemused:

Is it just me or does anyone else read "Archer's" dialog in The Snipers voice?

Brilliant! Brilliant! I look forward to more of your splendid story!:twilightsmile:

archer is now going to be spending a lot of time with pinkie

While I enjoyed the new chapter, the conversational, fourth-wall-breaking narrator is not something that I am particularly fond of when not done JUST right.

pinkie pie is the shit yo....

i laughed so hard, the cat gut was hilarious :pinkiecrazy::pinkiecrazy::pinkiecrazy::pinkiecrazy::pinkiecrazy:

Love the story. Can't wait for the next chapter!:pinkiehappy:

My god that was so fucking hilarious. Im laughing my ass of right now.:rainbowlaugh: Great job, I was wondering when they would find out that we use animal skin. Though dont you think that cat gut bowstrings are a little too far?

94472 It's a real thing, and bowstrings are really made from it. Though it's not from cats, it's from cattle. Which might be worse, considering cows talk in Equestria.

94507 Haha. That's hilarious. :rainbowlaugh: I'm fine with it if it's cows. I just find it a little disturbing if it's cats.

♫♥I look forward to reading what happens next in your story♥♪

"Beneath this pink fur there is more than a pony. Beneath this pink fur there is insanity, Mr. Archer, and insanity is explosionproof." :pinkiehappy:

Pinkie is best steam golem pony..

102325 and if did mange to kill pinkie wouldnt by theory all of her pent-up insanity come forth and manifest itself? :3 i bet it would be and evil pie monster:pinkiehappy:

As you could guess from the chapter title, this is one of the stupider chapters.

In fact, it's the stupidest chapter I plan on writing, ever. Enjoy.

“Now, really. You weren’t very polite, and it took me fifteen whole minutes to stitch his face back together!”

And that is why this is the best fan fiction.

more stupid chapters:duck: please? for rarity?

OMG:rainbowlaugh:HAHAHAHAHA IT HURTS HAHAHAHAHA:rainbowlaugh:

Epic. Just... Epic. I only wish I could have discovered this story a month from now, so I could thoroughly enjoy the whole thing in one sitting.

Cool communication system, but I notice that they haven't become technomagically advanced enough to make the mirror-to-mirror magic link without the middle-man (er, woman)/operator yet.:trollestia:
A great and funny story.

This was absoltely Hilarious!:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy: I'm still beaming from "YOUR PASTRIES ARE TOO TINY! ARCHER DEMANDS MORE!" Even if you don't plan on doing more hilarous things of this nature I'd say you most definately have the skill for it!

Pinkie and Archer are the two best characters in this story by far.


Well... If it's for Rarity, I guess.

Excellent, simply EXCELLENT! One of the best fanfics I had the pleasure to read! I can't wait for MOAR!!!

MY GOD! That was fucking hilarious. :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:


This is a perfectly acceptable reaction to the last line.

This is epic as always. Whenever I get an email saying a new chapter has come out I squeal like a fangirl. DON'T JUDGE ME!:pinkiecrazy:

I really look forward to reading more!:yay:

Login or register to comment