It Takes A Princess

by Casketbase77

Or Maybe A Queen

Creativa sat stupified.

The entity that had grown from Luna was pacing back and forth like a starving panther, and had been doing so for the past few minutes. Anemic wings hung limply at its sides, but each huff of her powerful borrowed lungs perked them up just a little more as the bloodflow returned.

"A sun guardian who is at the same time a draconequus!" The entity was growling to itself more than Creativa. "Two terrible tastes that taste terrible together. Just one of those qualities would be an capital offense to reason, but he just had to defiminise me on sight. To declare himself sole lunarch! Ad damnandum eum! Once I'm back at full strength, he's history. No, wait, less than history. Damnatio memorae is more apropos!"

The entity was spouting profanities that Creativa hadn't heard in centuries. Least of all she wouldn’t have expected them to come from the terminally polite Luna. What was unfolding here made no sense to her, though a large part of that was because the thing hadn't stopped to address her directly.

"Hate," it was trumpeting. "Hate hate hate hate hate HATE..."

Long nights tutoring Twiddle had taught Creativa to hold off interrupting another pony’s thoughts. But truth be told the previous two hours had been the most harrowing and eventful of Creativa's long life. Everypony had a limit to their pleasantry. Luna had obviously passed hers. Creativa decided to follow suit. She wiped her nose and cleared her throat.

“Who are y-“

“Finally recovered your resolve?! Excellent. You will now supply intel.” The pony who’d replaced Luna broke off its pacing to prowl closer, hoarse voice firing off militaristic demands.

“The young mouthy one. Her monologue challenged the usurper to ‘sit on his throne,’ so where would that be? What is your world’s equivalent to Canterlot? Furthermore, what is this world even called?”

Creativa blinked, uncomprehending.

“The equivalent of Canterlot!” The entity reiterated. “State its name and compass bearing, chaos princess! No doubt the usurper has gone to languish in what he idiotically believes is victory. Vultures always go home to roost after getting fat on stolen sustenance. Stolen!“

The last word had been an animalistic shriek that made Creativa wince. She frowned with renewed resolution.

“I'm not a princess,” she finally replied. "And I must say, you’re rather eloquent for a loudmouthed marechild."

Rage contorted the entity’s face. Creativa feared for a moment she was about to be attacked, until the entity’s eyes scrunched shut and a steamy exhale vented the anger away.

“That I am,” it quietly agreed in a tone so controlled and articulate that she almost sounded like Luna again. Almost.

The entity loosed another steamy snort. Then it knelt near Creativa so the two of them were eye to closed eye. It seemed to be staying quiet through considerable self-restraint and Creativa realized she had the floor.

“Who are you?” Creativa asked gently.

“The bilge of Luna’s spiritual septic tank. I am dirty, ugly emergency fuel that is only burned when the lights are off.” The entity’s eyes opened again. They were still fiery, but also calm. “My turn. What is the name of this place?”

Creativa looked away. “Twiddle dubbed these the foothills of the Prancing Peaks. But they don’t have any real name. Nowhere around here does. The earth is the earth, and the sky is the sky. while Order has his way, nothing has any name. Twiddle Spiral was the one who named the Kalihorsey Desert when we retreated through there, and even named herself after I first... I...”

Recounting Twiddle’s now crushed spirit made Creativa choke up. The entity recognized her distress, but seemed unable to care.

“Your turn, though I’ll save you the effort of asking me my name: Once, I was Queen Nightmare Moon, though the title endured for less than an evening. Lost my crown and far more than that through hubris and rainbow lasers.”

Creativa's shaggy eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

“You have permission to laugh,” Nightmare Moon invited. “Years of looking out from Luna’s eyes have softened my feelings towards being defeated.”

“I hope I can reach your level of acceptance someday,” Creativa sighed. “I never had a crown of my own to lose, but I still feel like curling up and fading when Order told me to.” She traced a hoof through the grass regretfully. “I don’t have my powers anymore. I’m just a tired old mare with no one left. I wish saying that out loud made me more upset, but I think deep down I always knew there was never any real hope fo-“

“By Faust, you are a depressive sadsack! Have been since you crashlanded on that beach and got one over on Celestia. If that had been me rubbing her face in the sand, you can bet every Bit in the castle vault I’d be hot to trot for weeks afterwards.” Nightmare Moon tapped a hoof to her lip in contemplation. “Then again, inter alia, the reason I exist is to take Celestia down as many notches as I can.” Nightmare Moon seemed lost in self-indulgent reverie for a moment. Creativa has noticed that Nightmare’s favorite pastime was talking about herself to herself. The monster mare abruptly frowned with disgust and acknowledged her companion again.

“You are not Celestia, though. You may look and sound the part, but you lack her... Sui generis. I find it horrifically dull to bully creatures like you who don’t deserve it. There is however a certain sun-patterned usurper who will be an absolute treat to knock off his high horse. A high horse he stole ad imo pectoire, I should reiterate.”

A defensive guffaw escaped Creativa, which made Nightmare Moon tense with insulted anger until she realized the laughter wasn’t directed at her.

“You sound so much like Loopa,” Creativa sighed mournfully. “She always spoke in paragraphs when I was upset, hoping that eventually she’d say something that would cheer me up.” She wiped her eyes with her wing. “When am I gonna learn to let the memory of her go?”

Nightmare Moon snarled contemptuously. “If you put half as much effort into helping me as you do into slurring out eulogies, I’d have the good half of my soul back and you’d have that sister of yours unfrozen by now.”

“Wha-?”

“Deodamnatus, chaos mare! I speak two tongues, and neither seem to be ones you understand: You and I are not beaten. Not as long as our horns sport points and our wings have lift.” She gave a few flaps to demonstrate. “And it seems these are finally alive again, keen on carrying me towards a rematch with the only creature in the multiverse with an ego bigger than mine. But to throttle that boor, I need to know where he dwells. So before you slump and atrophy where you sit, you will give me a bearing. Now or never, because I’m out of tact, out of patience, and out of excuses to not go find him myself.”

Creativa regarded Nightmare Moon for a moment. She couldn’t remember the last time she hadn’t felt afraid. In her darkest, most isolated moments, Creativa wondered if fear was all that had ever kept her moving forward. Nightmare Moon had a fire in her hollow soul that Creativa envied. Did she maybe have a Nightmare Moon of her own, somewhere deep down? She supposed it was possible, but she supposed more that it didn’t matter. She was already in the company of someone unflinching. It gave Creativa’s weary knees the strength to stand.

“South by South-Southeast of here is the centroid of the continent. There’s a palace there, on a cliff. I’ve wandered the world several times over and never seen another like it.” Creativa spread her mismatched wings. “And I can take you there.”

Good pony! As I said, we’re not beaten yet." Nightmare Moon ran a hoof through her hair, relaxing into the role of a commander forming war plans. "You can let your greyed out followers languish under Order’s control for now; in a castle siege, the safest occupants are the prisoners in the dungeon. We'll free out afterwards at our leisure.”

“If... if you say so. But even if we find Order at the palace, what can we possibly do to stand against him? The world is empty of chaos, not that it ever did much against him. And what about you? Doesn’t all your magic belong to Order now?”

Nightmare Moon scoffed before taking flight. “He has my magic, yes. But it doesn’t belong to him. It will never belong to anypony but me. But I’ll make that better known once you take us close enough. Now giddyup! I’m a very punctual pony!”

Creativa pumped her wings a few times to prime them.

I’m coming for you, Loopa. Forgive me for making you wait this long.

Creativa rocketed up into the tepid twilight, off to guide an angel of vengeance to the lair of a demon who’d plagued her world far past his allotted time.

Author's Note:

Next week: "Luna" vs Order, round two!

Comments

[A Predatorial Horse]

Man I’m glad you updated this now. Earlier today I realized that I hadn’t put this in my tracking list nor could I remember it’s title or author.

[Bree R]

I really wish you'd take more time with your stories. Slow down, let them breathe more. Let us get used to new and introduced characters instead of rushing right to climax after climax. It's really what's missing from you being a really fantastic author. That said this was a very entertaining story thus far. Thanks for sharing.

[Casketbase77]

10353168
I'm the first to admit I'm hyper hustling to get this fic finished by August 1st (the contest due date) and that the character moments are suffering as a result.

It Takes A Princess has been a learning process for me, and the main lesson I've gleaned is that I work terribly under any time constraints. I teased it waaaay back in my first ever blog post, but there's a longform Sweetie Bot story I've been working on off and on for the past year or so without publishing. That one will probably be my best work when I finally show it to the world.

In short, I'm aware the wheels are wobbling on this one. Just gotta push forward with it at this point and be more mindful of future projects. I don't think I'll be entering another contest for a good long time.

[Starcat5]

Wait... how long was I sitting on the last chapter? Bah, not important. I'm just glad that I pressed the back button instead of simply closing the tab. I am also glad that Moonie isn't in a "kill first, ask questions never" mood. I was kind of worried about that last chapter.

[Starcat5]

10353185
Not to be that guy, but we are in the final hours of that contest, depending on the exact hour the contest judge has as the deadline.

[Casketbase77]

10361829
I’m well aware. Sad to say the fic won’t be done on time for the contest. It will get done though. I talked to Nitro and she understands I wanna take more time to deliver a good ending to this fic. Still editing the climactic rematch at the moment, after which there’ll be a falling action chapter and/or epilogue. This is the first longform fic I’ve ever written, and it’s been a learning experience. Mostly that I can’t keep a deadline to save my life.

The climax chapter will go live by Thursday evening. After that, I’ll grit my teeth and work hard to give this story the ending it deserves, persistent writer’s block be damned. The oneshot I published yesterday was an attempt to break out of my current slump, and judging by its reception, it worked. This fic has my exclusive and reinvigorated attention now.

[Starcat5]

10361875
*Raises glass* The contest may be a lost cause, but this fic is still going strong. Cheers.

[Casketbase77]

10361896

Writer’s block continues to plague me. I hope to finish and upload the next chapter by tomorrow evening. I deeply apologize for stringing you along like this.

[Nitro Indigo]

So... was this quietly cancelled?

[Casketbase77]

10401268
Nah, just badly stalled by writer’s block. I simply can’t get the final showdown to feel right, so I’m working on other stuff before taking another swing at wrapping this fic up.

I severely bit off more than I could chew with this one. Just can’t write action very well.

[Edguy0009]

Even though it's been almost a year and I just discovered it, I'll wait.

[Late_Night]

10401517
so, you gonna update this?

[Casketbase77]

10866124
10807561

As of today, this story is my top Fimfiction priority. It deserves a proper ending, so I'll be putting pen to paper and reworking the final drafted chapters. Two weeks until another update, at the absolute MAXIMUM. That's a promise.