Our Hearts Are Beating Power Roaring Our Claim
The Siren swam through the air, long tail lashing to propel itself forward. There was caution in its movements - the emotional flare of Twilight and Rarity's fight had drawn attention and interest but the Siren wasn't stupid. Something had been off about the amplified burst of emotion and no monster lived for so long without learning basic prudence.
It swept around the outside of the group in a wide arc, narrowed eyes glaring down at the four ponies. All held their positions - the three unicorns in their circles and Octavia ready to draw the final line of the seal.
"Steady..." Octavia said it just as much to herself as to the others.
All three unicorns lit their horns, throwing up shields. None of them were particularly strong at it - Vinyl's in particular wobbled at the edges - but it was all the defense they had given their immobility.
The Siren circled again, evaluating the ponies. It feinted towards them, making Rarity flinch back.
"Steady," Octavia repeated.
They tensed - and the Siren abruptly turned and rocketed back towards the bay.
"Damn it!!" The earth pony looked to Vinyl. "Grab it! If it makes it to open waters, we'll never find it before it attacks another town!"
The pale unicorn nodded - the shield she'd erected vanished like a soap bubble in the wind. Instead, her magenta magic lashed out, hurling a quintet of phantasmal needles after the flying creature - each trailing a thin thread behind. They struck home just as the Siren passed over the water and yanked it backwards. On her own, Vinyl didn't have the strength to haul the beast back - only to keep it in place for a few moments.
But that's what Octavia was for.
Twilight watched with wide eyes as the earth pony demonstrated just why she had been chosen by the Princesses. Grey hooves lashed out, tearing lines in the sandy beach. The cellist recognized what Octavia was drawing - these weren't the graceful, often intricate works of runes in Old Ponish or Ancient Horse. These were rougher marks based in the old Griffon kingdoms and rumored to have been taught to them by even more ancient sources. Few modern mages used them: while they had a primal power, they burned out quickly and few unicorns would bother. But for an earth pony? Short-lived power could work wonders.
Octavia's hoof flashed, sketching out three fast runes in a brutal tongue older than Equestria. Xata - Khra - Jahu. All three surged to life with a deep purple magic. The unicorns dropped to their knees as a sudden weight yanked downwards. The Siren - unprepared as it struggled to get free of Vinyl's snare - hit the shore with a wave of water and sand. The moment it did, Octavia's hoof swiped over her work and wiped out the Xata rune. A heartbeat later, the Fass rune she drew in its place flared up. Gravity changed - Twilight was caught off-guard as it shifted left. She wasn't the only one, too, judging by Rarity's surprised yelp.
The Siren was surprised even more, however. The abrupt change in the direction that gravity worked plus Vinyl's yanking on her phantasmal threads pulled the creature across the beach. It tried to retake flight now that the downwards pull was gone - but it was too late.
Vinyl heaved, bringing the Siren inside the massive pre-drawn circle just as her lines snapped. Octavia's hoof flashed, etching the final line of the final rune of the final ring. The dusky scene lit with dawn's light as hundreds of scribbled runes ignited with magical energy. Drawing directly from the natural flowing power of Equestria, it burned a painfully bright blue-white. The gravity-twisting runes Octavia had inscribed burned out, relaxing the pull... and in the wake, everything was momentarily still and silent.
Four ponies gathered themselves, watching the Siren intently. If the seal held (if), they were safe. And the beast--
It reached out, webbed hoof touching against an invisible wall. The slight contact made the whole circle flash with power again, ringing out a painfully discordant tone. "Hmph." All four ponies blinked owlishly as the creature snorted derisively. And then it spoke.
The words were foreign - sounds just enough familiar enough to be recognizable as words. The Siren spoke loudly, voice washing over them like the tide.
Boldly, Octavia took a step forward and shouted back a reply in the same odd tongue.
Rarity frowned sharply. "I feel as if I'm a child and have to wait whilst the adults do the talking."
Across the circle, Vinyl shrugged with a look of sympathy on her face.
Fortunately, Twilight wasn't as lost. "They're speaking Old Ponish," she confirmed. "I'm a little rusty, but I think the Siren just called herself Aria. Now she's complimenting Octavia on being capable of such old magic." A pause. "Also she just called Octavia a candelabra. My Old Ponish isn't that great so I could be misunderstanding or it might some old slang."
With a snort, Rarity tossed her hair. "A candelabra is intended to hold multiple long, hard objects darling. She almost certainly meant it to be an insult."
Twilight blushed miserably at the implication. Instead, she tried to concentrate on the evolving conversation between Siren and earth pony. "She, um, now she's trying to bargain. She says she could break out, but it would take more effort than she wants to expend. And that she'll reward Octavia greatly with riches and knowledge from under the sea." A pause. "Which Octavia's refusing, of course."
"Of course," Rarity affirmed, expecting nothing less.
Another pause as the exchange continued. "Octavia's threatening her, telling her that she can't be allowed to prey on ponies anymore. She's not telling her about the power siphon in the runes, though." Twilight paled. "And now Aria's mentioning she can understand modern Ponish, she just doesn't like speaking it."
There was a loud smack as Vinyl facehoofed.
Octavia frowned deeply at the cellist. "Thank you, Twilight."
The purple unicorn cringed. "Sorry! Sorry!"
With a sigh, Octavia resumed the conversation and Twilight continued to translate. "Aria is complimenting Octavia, saying that she expected no less from a student of Starswirl's. And she's correcting her back that she's actually a stud--"
The conversation ended abruptly as Aria let out a ground-shaking bellow of anger.
"She doesn't like the Princesses!" Twilight braced all four legs against the force of the Siren's rage.
"OBVIOUSLY!" Both Rarity and Octavia were in agreement with that statement.
Aria, of course, immediately followed through with her threat and tried to break free. A webbed hoof smashed into the barrier again, momentarily blinding the ponies with the magical flash. Her strike failed to break - instead it skittered along the arc of the circle, scraping as if across a chalkboard. A second strike gave the same result, drawing a bellow of anger from the Siren.
The runic circle at the base of it all pulsed. Just once at first - just to signal the spells locked within starting up. Inside her containment, Aria winced as she felt the first tug of her magic being drained. Her response was both predictable and violent. The Siren lashed out, unleashing an ear-splitting cacophonic howl. At the same time, the gem at her throat pulsed with crimson energy, pushing an explosion of magic outwards. It struck the barrier with another flash and another off-key screech - but the wall held.
Another blue-white pulse around the circle, and Aria grimaced. This time the unicorns felt it - a sharp tingle zipping up from their hooves to their horns. Vinyl acted almost instantly, her horn lighting and reforming a protecting shield in front of herself. While her earlier one had been unsteady and haphazard, this one lept to powerful life. A rich red brocade barricade sprung into existence as a backup to the still strong containment circle.
Rarity and Twilight were less prepared: both shuddered as the spike of power hit them. Reflexively they surged like foals - projecting the raw magical energy in a burst. Twilight's shattered a nearby tree; Rarity managed to at least aim hers upwards into the sky.
"Concentrate!" Octavia galloped around the edge, putting herself by the shaken Twilight. "The next pulse should be in forty seconds - you have to be ready to avoid injury!"
Twilight snapped back almost instantly. "You don't have to yell!"
That was a mistake. Aria's eyes locked onto Twilight as her mouth twisted to a grin full of razors.
A sound tickled Twilight's ears and she snarled. "Unlike you, we're not professionals at this! We don't fight giant monsters all the time so this is kind of out of our league!" She thrust her hoof at Octavia accusingly as the grey mare dropped to a knee and clutched her head. "You're the one who said we could handle this, not us! We should never have listened to you!"
Another pulse ripped across the circle - and up the unicorn's horns. Twilight's exploded out a shower of fireworks that were almost as violent as her current mood. "And now you're just sitting there, not helping!"
From her place nearby, Rarity hissed. "Will you two be QUIET!? I've got a pounding hornache from this magic and I shan't tolerate your whining to go with it!"
Snapping her head around, Twilight's glare stabbed into Rarity. "Things aren't always about you, Rarity! We've got bigger problems right now than you needing an aspirin! If Octavia doesn't get off her fat flank right now, we could get seriously hurt!"
"I am seriously hurt, you overwrought donkey!" Rarity's lips curled cruelly as she swung her words at Twilight's smug face. "Maybe if you paid attention to what I was saying instead of obsessing over pointless minutae--"
The argument was interrupted as another pulse wracked through them - neither released the energy this time, causing both unicorns to be wracked by twitching pain. But their silence for a moment was enough to let Octavia's quiet, gasping voice be heard. "Dark magic."
As the shudders passed, both unicorns glared at Octavia. "What?" Twilight growled at the idiot earth pony who obviously couldn't possibly understand anything about real magic.
"Dark magic," she repeated. "The Siren is using it to taint your emotions. Anger feeds her and gives her power." Octavia groaned in pain. "Can't you hear her?"
The pair of unicorns looked at each other with a mix of confusion and rage.
On the far side of the circle, Vinyl Scratch lashed outwards. She had been venting the magical surges into an ever more elaborate defensive construct - but seeing the opening she turned it all into a club of telekinetic power. It slammed into the barrier, causing another bright flash of light... and a painful sour note that wracked the ears of both musicians. And that discordant noise was enough to momentarily disrupt the blanket of song the Siren was laying down - enough for a moment of clarity to spring into both their minds.
"W--What?" Rarity wobbled on her hooves as the fog lifted. She rubbed her head to try and push away the screaming migraine she had.
"Dark magic," Octavia repeated, desperation thick as molasses. "Vinyl and I have some resistance because of the Elements, but Vinyl has no experience with counterspells and none of my runes work against songs."
Twilight looked at Rarity. Rarity looked back. Both nodded meaningfully.
"I think," Twilight noted, "We just figured out why the Princesses told you to bring us." The next surge hit, and Twilight's horn ignited like a torch. With a pop, she tore through the very fabric of spacetime and pulled. Like a sword unsheathing from its scabbard, Twilight pulled her cello through the ether from Canterlot.
Rarity blinked. "Darling, since when have you been able to do that?"
Lamely, Twilight shrugged. "I usually can't at anywhere near this range, but, um, since before we met?" She laughed nervously. "Have ya seen me? Do I look like I could carry a cello across the city on my back?"
Rarity pursed her lips in wry amusement. "No darling, I suppose you couldn't. It's a shame I haven't practiced the same trick, so I suppose you're a solo act."
"Rarity." Twilight rolled her eyes. "The Princesses asked for us, not me." She fought back the urge to snap at her marefriend. "Now come on, I can feel her song getting into my head again. I prefer your voice over hers."
Rarity blew Twilight a kiss. "Darling, I do so love it when you have a point. The Diva on three, if you please."
Three quick taps of the bow on the side of her cello, and Twilight launched into a slow, high-pitched tune. The notes soared, vibrating gently at the peaks. Rarity, after waiting a moment, lifted her voice with a rising operatic song. The Siren's assault stopped as Aria listened for a moment to her namesake - then she joined in, melding her powerful voice in with Rarity's.
Together they danced through Twilight's music and the dark magic started to press down again. Octavia groaned in pain as it stabbed into her head; Vinyl tried unsteadily to reform her defensive shield; Twilight grit her teeth as she tightly focused on her playing; Rarity simply.. sang. And floated along the currents of the Siren's music.
Under them, the runic circle pulsed again. Aria bobbled for a moment as another chunk of her magic was drained away. Vinyl's shield burst to full life again - but the focus was on the two musicians. The surge hit, and Twilight suddenly thumped a hoof on the side of her cello. A few quick hits to mimic percussion - and her tempo abruptly shifted. Faster now; deeper notes that rumbled under Rarity's voice as it rose again.
Aria joined back in, but suddenly found herself outpaced. Rarity's song surged to life - not merely rising to the sky but leaping around as she jumped from octave to octave unpredictably with sharp, choppy shifts. It flowed beautifully none the less, but the rapid changes in key signature left Aria in the dust. As she fell out of tune with the two musicians, the dark magic of the Siren's voice faded and was subsumed by Twilight and Rarity's own power.
And it was the power drained from Aria that sealed the deal - as they played and sang, the energy from the runes pushed through them. Both horns lit, throwing raw magical power into the sky. But not as a foal's surging blast - the magic flowed out, growing and stretching like tendrils of ivy. Cornflower blue intertwined with raspberry, painting the air with their combined energy.
Inside the barrier, Aria's song turned to a howl of frustration. Being defeated by ponies in song drove the Siren from survival to rage - she lashed out again, tail slamming into the barrier over and over. The dissonant crashes broke apart the ponies' song, though still the barrier held.
Beside it all, Octavia gathered herself up as the pain of the dark magic passed. As the energy of the circle flashed from the impacts, she regarded it with a critical (if quick) eye. "Final stage!" She trotted around the outside of it as the runes pulsed again. "The bursts are going to come faster as it nears completion! Keep pushing it out as it comes in - we can do this!" Her part was done for the moment - there was little Octavia could do but cheer on her friends as they vented the Siren's energy away.
But the Siren wasn't going quietly. Even as her magic drained away, she thrashed and struck against her captivity. Then, abruptly, she stopped. She locked eyes on Octavia and spoke - even through the thick Old Ponish, the smugness was obvious.
"What did she--" Rarity only got that out before Twilight cut her off.
Twilight - with eyes dangerously wide. "That if she can talk and sing through the barrier, it won't stop--"
And that was when a concentrated lance of sonic force passed straight through the wall and struck a very surprised Octavia. Her body ragdolled across the beach, bouncing three times before she cracked into a stone and came to a halt. The earth pony groaned in pain.
Panic went through the unicorns - Twilight and Rarity immediately tossed their own shields up again as Aria twisted around in her containment. The pulses of the runes were speeding up - now only seconds apart. The Siren needed escape now and she knew it.
But she also wanted a bit of revenge.
The first burst of sound slammed into Rarity's shield - one of the three layers of diamond-shaped fields shattered, but the other two remained strong.
The second a pulse later hit Twilight's. The surface of her magenta bubble rippled under the force - and then gave way. With a cry of pain, she was struck full on.
Stunned, Twilight sailed through the air for several body lengths before striking the water. A splash - and she didn't get up.
"TWILIGHT!" Rarity didn't think. The situation around them simply didn't enter her mind. All she could see was Twilight, laying face-down in the surf and not moving. She was at a full gallop before she finished shouting the name - diving into the shallows of the beach to turn Twilight over and let her breathe again.
Then the runes pulsed, and there was only one unicorn left.
Vinyl Scratch's face contorted in pain. Even if she'd had words, none of them would have been enough to describe the energy that was coursing through her body - fire and lightning and ice and raw unadulterated force. She pushed what she could into the shield before her - but it wasn't enough. Another pulse hit only a few seconds later. Vinyl dropped to her knees as her horn started to spark and the tips of her mane ignited.
Wobbling on unsteady legs, Octavia rose. She looked at the speeding flash of the runes. At the suffering Vinyl. At Aria's vengeful smile.
Halfway across Equestria in Ponyville, the Element of Loyalty raised his head as his cutie mark glowed.
Sand kicked high as Octavia stampeded forwards. She lept - and she shoved. Vinyl tumbled out of her place around the circle just as the next pulse hit.
Octavia screamed as it hit her instead.
She couldn't vent the magic being siphoned off - she was an earth pony, and the lack of horn gave her no easy way to dispose of the power. Even if she had, it wouldn't have mattered. The accelerating speed of the runic magic and the destabilized, uneven distribution meant far too much power was coming in. Overloaded, Octavia's cries of pain echoed across the beach as she was enveloped in a white light.
And then everything went silent. Save, at least, for the sound of Twilight wretchedly trying to purge the water from her lungs.
When the spots on their eyes faded, the three unicorns saw just how much had changed in a matter of seconds. The runic ring was no more - the powerless runes themselves reduced to etchings seared into the ground by the final surge of magic. Aria - the Siren - lay in the middle. Completely still, steam rose from her body as her scales already began to flake away. And Octavia... was gone. All that remained in the final outer circle was a smear of ash.
Vinyl slumped to the ground beside the scorch that had been Octavia. Tears flowing free, she simply... stared at the space her friend had been. The two musicians - Rarity supporting a limping Twilight - hobbled over.
"I'm... I'm so sorry." Twilight's voice cracked. She reached out with her uninjured hoof, setting it on Vinyl's shoulder to try and give what small comfort she could.
Something in the pile of Siren shifted. All three looked over - and Vinyl's eyes went from teary to murderous. Her magic roared to life, instantly forming a massive pair of glowing scissors in the air.
Twilight tore herself away from Rarity, grabbing hold of the enraged unicorn. "Vinyl! Vinyl, no!"
Vinyl Scratch shoved Twilight off of her - and for once, Rarity let it happen. Her own cold eyes were locked on the fallen Siren as well, after all.
A step forward - then she stopped as the sound of wings approached. The three remaining looked upwards as three more arrived. Soaring down from the sky came two alicorns - one the color of the warm sun and the other the shade of cooling night. With them was a small griffon, flapping furiously to keep up.
They landed - immediately the small griffon embraced Vinyl. It was enough to stop the unicorn's rage, evaporating it just as the phantasmal scissors did. They cried together for a few moments before Vinyl pulled back in confusion. The griffon's eyes were tearful - but she was also smiling.
Twilight and Rarity, meanwhile, bowed and prostrated themselves on the seared sand. Rarity took the lead first. "Princess Adagio. Princess Sonata. We--"
"Rise," commanded the pale golden alicorn. "Rise like the sun, my little ponies. You have exceeded our expectations."
It was more the surprise and less the command that made Twilight's head pop up. "Exceeded?! But Octavia's--"
Princess Sonata put a blue hoof to Twilight's lips. "Not everything's like it looks at first," she noted with a sly giggle.
While the ponies looked between the Princesses in confusion, Sonata broke off towards the fallen Siren. Adagio spoke to them instead, while her sister examined the remains. "Long ago," she began, "A trio of Sirens terrorized Equestria. At first they merely attacked the isolated fringes but as they grew stronger from the rising anger of its ponies, they became bolder. Struck larger settlements. Hurt more and more ponies. One day, the greatest heroes of Equestria met them on the field of battle, determined to stop this reign of terror." A small chuckle slipped from her lips. "And so began an entirely different reign."
She stepped to the side, giving full view to Sonata as her magic tore the fallen Siren's body apart - ripping scales wide. Underneath was not bare flesh but a pony. An alicorn in pale pink and purple that blinked at the blue one above it.
The ponies gawked. "I-- but-- how?" Twilight asked the question, for Rarity had as few words as Vinyl did.
"The runes were not simply containment," Adagio explained with a knowing smile. "They were transformative. When Starswirl used them on us, it birthed Sonata and I from our Sirenic forms to what we are now."
Leading the reborn but weak Aria over, Sonata eased in. "But Aria got away. And before we could try and help her, Starswirl got pulled into Limbo and took the magic with him."
Adagio nodded. "So we have spent the last thousand years watching as our sister raged and fought. We were forced again and again to repel her from Equestria's shores, each time hurting our sister and driving her away from us for the good of our ponies."
"Now we have her back!" Sonata nuzzled Aria - who simply smiled awkwardly, eyes unable to meet anyone else's. "Because the Elements rescued Starswirl from Limbo, he gave us the magic again and then Octavia did this!"
Vinyl looked back and forth between the three Princesses and the scorched ruin where Octavia had last stood. With hard eyes, she glared at Aria.
Having already learned to interpret, Rarity put it into words. "So you sacrificed Octavia for your sister?" There was no confusion in her tone - only cold anger and disapproval.
"No." Adagio's voice was calm, despite the abruptness of the word. "Understand, please. Now that Aria has returned, we can take our proper places. I as the day, she as the night..."
"I'm the dusk," Sonata chirruped.
"And she," Adagio noted, "Shall be our dawn."
On cue, there was a tone - a single note at first, volume rising from just below hearing. As it did, other notes came as well, as if an orchestra was coming into being. The ephemeral chord peaked with a mote of light appearing in the air over the burnt ash - a single point that grew rapidly to a sphere. It grew until it burst and the music ended suddenly, scattering tiny fragments of light through the air. In its wake was the crumpled, tired form of a grey pony.
Vinyl broke away from the griffon's embrace and mouthed a single word - 'Tavi?'
As woozy and unsteady as Aria had been a minute before, Octavia rose to her hooves.
And then she spread her wings.
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Hope · 12k words · 38 2 · 783 views
- Hotel_Chicken · 1.6k words · 44 4 · 888 views
- The Red Parade · 1.7k words · 33 6 · 532 views
- Bicyclette · 13k words · 64 10 · 768 views
- FabulousDivaRarity · 5.8k words · 36 3 · 1.4k views
- SkycatcherEQ · 29k words · 71 2 · 1.4k views
- James Pwyll · 2k words · 43 0 · 721 views
Stats
Page generated in 0.106 seconds
Total duration
768 users online
715,090 hits today, 2,054,621 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Huh...Really didn't see that coming.
This story is great. Can't wait for the next chapter
Edit: I just saw the complete tag. This feels like it cuts off before an epilogue.
Very fine.
(And Luna is, of course, the queen of the changelings.
)
Okay, gotta say, that bit with the sisters really caught me off guard, and now that it's over I can't help but want more from this world, even if it's just another chaper or two, or even a one-shot sequel.
Also
First the chapter titles and now Requiem Runes, you are just making all the references after my own heart.
At the risk of being that guy, how exactly can a hoof be webbed? Looking at the sirens, they did have cloven hooves, so I guess that can work, but it doesn't seem that much more hydrodynamic.
Thrilling conflict. And that ending... You sly dog. Excellent work from start to finish. Thank you for it and best of luck in the judging.
10343465
Honestly, it's the best I could figure out to describe it. The sirens have that sort of fin on the rear side of their fetlock, which is what I was trying to indicate. I suppose 'webbed' is a bad descriptor for that, but it's all I could really think of.
10343231
Idle note: that was the Requiem combination for my first Lich. It's the little things, y'know?
10342617
It sort of does, actually.
Originally there was an additional epilogue chapter with the coronation as the background to Twilight and Rarity discussing moving to Ponyville. It would've also been bringing Gabby in for a bit of screen time to do a little more last-second world building. I opted to cut it because the end here - abrupt as it is - had more punch to it than a slow denouement.
Now that the contest is over, I can post comments about the entries themselves, so here’s some neutral thoughts:
Right, so I'm in judgey judgmental Judge mode for this comment, not casual reader mode. Which...sounds a lot worse than it is, I'm just letting you know that I was reading this story differently from how I normally read stories.
Actually in fact you have nothing to seriously worry about: this was a very well-put together and complete story, with strong focus on our four mains. Swapping two sets of ponies was fun as a focus, and I love that the changes for this little mini-AU you've put together go still deeper than that, a full swapped universe. At the same time, you also did a good job of making sure to do more than simply make Twilight act like Octavia or Vinyl act like Rarity; the original personalities have definitely influenced the four of them and can be clearly seen.
I'll admit to always being personally impressed when a writer can do a good job of getting music across in their text. Sound generally is hard to translate across into the written form; music, even more so. Although of course providing a link helped out as well - good choice, by the way.
I think what most impressed me about this story was the fact that the "swapped roles" kept coming. Rather than settling on telling a story about merely swapping Octavia and Twilight and Vinyl and Rarity, you kept switching around roles in ways that thematically made sense with your initial switch - music - until you'd made an entire alternate universe out of the swapped roles that's beckoning for the reader to investigate it more.
Fantastic job, basically. That's my judgey judgmental Judgement of this. Congrats on winning the contest!
10363309
I'll be honest? I was just as surprised as everyone else.
The initial seed was because I had another Octavia story that got trashed/deep backburnered. Since she was already on my mind I decided to give it a try and asked "What's the most unlikely role she could be in?" and turning her into Magic lept out as the most off-the-wall, illogical choice I could think of.
Then I went "Well crap, Octavia without Vinyl just seems wrong. I know, I'll insert some RariTwi and double-swap!"
Then it was "Well, why would they interact though?" And so monster hunting.
"But why them?" And needing musicians to fight a Siren made sense - music against music.
And then it just started rolling faster and faster and around the point I went "Well, Spike's origin doesn't make any sense at all with Octavia so... Gabby! Yeah!" and then I realized that maybe I'd gone a little far but if you're gonna do something you might as well go all in.
Still, I'm flattered that it's been well received! It's always great to know that a story's hit the mark.
10344974 Maybe you could publish the epilogue as a sequel? Just a suggestion; I don’t want to come across as demanding.
This is my second read-through, and I still think the twist is great. Throughout the fanfic, characters have talked about “the princesses”. Since their names weren’t mentioned, I assumed they were Celestia and Luna. When it turned out that they were Adagio and Sonata, everything came together. If saving the Pillars was these Elements’ first adventure, then not only does that make the AU more cohesive, but it’s also more original than a 1:1 parallel to Nightmare Moon; in fact, I like how Aria is similar to Luna here.
Also, it’s a nice touch that you mentioned griffon runes, because it opens up possibilities for Gabby. Also also, are the four protagonists’ cutie marks different in this universe?
10369416
Yup! I was actually rather careful about that. It's actually a slight clue early on that something's askew: Octavia is referred to as "the Princesses' personal student." I specifically used the plural possessive, as opposed to Twilight being the Princess's. The Pillars bit is similar, as it raises the question that if they were the initial meeting catalyst, what happened to Luna/why are there multiple Princesses? There's foreshadowing there, but I'm always gunshy about making it anything more than maximum subtle because I don't want to give the end away and readers are clever at the damnably worst times.
Rarity's specifically remains the same, I called that out. (Authorial side note: part of why Rarity swapped with Vinyl was the super brief nod in EQG where Rarity has a Daft Punk outfit on during Rainbow Rocks.) The others, I didn't touch on but I'd mentally reworked Twilight's as being her six-pointed star surrounded by quarter-notes. After that I sort of stumbled and couldn't get a sensible thought process together for Octavia/Vinyl on any differences, so I just didn't mention them.
Wait...
Does this mean that Luna and Celestia are lurking somewhere in Dougworld in human form causing trouble?
10381667
....They are now!
Ah, it's good to be proven correct...and it should have been telling when the Princesses weren't named. A good tale all around!
Brilliant story!
Ooh, I finally recognize some of the songs! Didn't know you were a Jyc Row fan.
As I'm sure you know (and for anyone else reading the comments), parts of Diva Dance were intentionally written to be effectively impossible to sing for a human (thus fitting for an alien singer). Human singers either use autotune/other computer stuff to help with their voice (like they did in the original), change it to be easier, or you can audibly hear them struggle a little.
On the story, liked it. Musician Twi was cool. Vinyl kind of took a backburner to the other three, must be hard to write a mute character in the presence of three chatterboxes. (Actually, how are you supposed to do it anyways? Hmm. I should try it. Next BWG prompt, perhaps.)