• Member Since 2nd Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen Jun 4th, 2013

Inky Swirl


Applejack has a voice that will not leave her alone. It isn't just some crazy magic or hallucination--she feels something physically and hears somepony speaking. Night after night, she's pushed it away, but it keeps coming back to try again. What is it that this voice wants from her? Why does her chest hurt so much? What does it all mean?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 28 )

I like the way that you conveyed Applejack's emotions. I wasn't sure where this was leading at first, but it seems very interesting and I look forward to more.

Cool i like:derpytongue2: also first

Nice, really nice bro, enjoyed a lot! have some mustaches :moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache::moustache:

I just wanted you to know, that from the image, tags, description and length, I would not normally read this story.
I am only reading it because you wrote it. This is the same way I decide what books to read, so I don't see a problem with this.

You have me intrigued. Please continue.

And now I have read it. Quite nice. I like how it makes you want to give the poor little pony a hug while at the same time making her much more defined and relatable as a person.

You just really want AJ to get her own song next season, don't you?

Also, Apple Bloom is a 2 word name.

I was worried it would go dark at a certain point. But it didn't, and I'm glad. Wouldn't it be cool if she got so good her Cutie Mark modified itself? Suddenly there were notes coming out of the apples?


Ya know what?

That would pretty awesome! :ajsmug:

I need to read this for research purposes, to see how good writers write Applejack in non-shipping stories.

Congrats on makin' EQD's unusually-high fanfic standards by the way. :pinkiehappy::rainbowkiss::raritystarry::twilightsmile::yay::ajsmug:

Just finished the story :ajsmug:

Nice story. Your portrayal of Applejack was very believable and easy to empathise with and her dialogue with the 'voice' was very well done. For a lot of the time, I thought that the voice was the element of honesty speaking to her and helping her be honest with herself (which it still could be, I guess). That concept could be fun to play around with a bit in future stories. :twilightsmile:

:heart: I think this is heartwarming :heart:

What? We don't get to find out what happens next?

Awesome work, prose of a literary god.

:rainbowderp: Well, dang. That one hit a lot closer to home than I was expecting.

She's got a good life on the farm, she knows her lot in life and she's happy. Or at least, she's convinced herself she's happy. And then a part of her asks, "Is it so bad to want something more? Is there a crime against wanting something else?" But she's comfortable; she doesn't want to ruin what she has, because it's good.

But it could be better. And she knows it in her heart. And her heart won't let her rest until she tries.

This story is so relatable that I felt like I was reading about myself rather than Applejack. Bravo. And bravo for plumbing the depths of her character; she's really unappreciated.

When the first mentions of Applejack's heart came up I feared the story was going to take a dark turn. I was very glad to see the direction the story was going instead. Great story bro :moustache:

1404863 I don't believe we need to - it's not the point. Whatever happens next, Applejack has given in and is following her dreams.

I liked this story. I'm not sure whether it couldn't do with a Sad tag, but it's a borderline case. AJ gets far too few stories dedicated to her character rather than her potential as a romantic partner. :ajsmug:

I never wanted to be an apple farmer. I always... wanted to be a... A choir pony!
Performing in the beautiful theaters of upper Canterlot! Singing with the best symphonies in Equestria! The Hoofton Fillyharmonic! The Fillydelphia Symphony! The Maremon Tabernacle Choir!
With the my coltfriend Soarin' by my side, we'd sing, sing, sing!

Oh, I am Applejack, and I'm okay! I sleep all night and I work all day!:ajsmug:

That was a great read. I think a lot of people, including myself, have these dreams and urges deep inside them that we're too afraid to follow. We're afraid of being judged, afraid of failure. I want to create music, but I listen to these great artists and bands and I feel so insignificant. We just have to keep pushing ourselves

Applejack would make an amazing singer. Let's hope she gets her own song in season 3 :heart:

A really nice story I thought, and a great representation and development of AJ's character and personality. It was quite refreshing to read a story that didn't really go anywhere as such and included a cast of one yet still managed to be so much more engrossing and interesting than many others. Upon reading the blurb, I was interested to discover the nature of her ache and what it meant. I really don't know why, but I figured it might have been something so mundane as a heart condition that might have prevented her from doing what she loved. It was nice to discover it was in fact somewhat the polar opposite, enabling her to do what she wished rather than hindering her.

I touched on it before, but I really do think you did a fantastic job of representing Applejack's character to perfection. She is a stubborn character with simple honest beliefs and I found this to be reflected really well. The fact that her wishes and desires were manifested as a nagging ache in her height just sounds so like AJ to me, and that only someone as stubborn as herself could make her want to change. I'm not sure anything else would've really worked quite the same tbh, it just seems so fitting that AJ would not be moved by magic, or manipulation, but only by a persistent physical pain that is both simple and natural and quite at home with a character who labours hard day in and day out.

A very beautiful and well crafted piece, you should feel very proud of it.

I loved that. A way of adding a new depth to Applejack's character without deviating from it.

Applejack is awesome, and you guys KNOW IT. :ajsmug:


That was beautiful, dude. I felt the feels. Thank you. :twilightsmile:


(Thanks, everpony. I'm glad you enjoyed it, and I take pride from comments that reveal I've inspired or even touched some of you. It was a strange, emotional, unique experience for me in the writing--a very spur-of-the-moment idea that issued a command to my fingertips to start snapping the keys.)

Personally... I still can't get over the mental image of Applejack up in the hay loft with the doors open and the moon shining down, with her Stetson in her forelegs, giving it her all. It's just exquisitely beautiful to me, and it's like I'm seeing raw passion. Like an apple tree seedling making its way out of the ground, full of life and promise...

(Oh, God, Imma cry now, sonofabitch... :facehoof:)


This here is a perfect example of how the way that something is written is more important than the events that actually occur.

*Reads over all the ancient comments... realizes that everything he wanted to say has already been said* Well... drat. I wanted to say that you're awesome, but apparently that's already been beaten into your skull. Guess all I can say is keep up the good work!

This is awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:pinkiehappy:
enough said
but ill say more anyway
your character building for applejack is the best i have ever read for anyone like this
personal battles inside ones self are very important and this was extremely well done
please make more of these for other characters and continue this one if at all possible
this is one of my top favorites on the entire site and beyond
thank you

One of those creative stories I love so much. Nice work!

Raise this barn, raise this barn 1-2-3-4 together we can stop the bats 1-2-3-4 :heart:

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