- Member Since 16th Sep, 2011
- offline last seen Oct 5th, 2018
CoastalSarv
Old donkey from the north. Likes pie and strong black coffe.Avatar by KeePony: http://www.fimfiction.net/user/KeePony
CoastalSarv
Joined 16th Sep, 2011 ·
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Oh geez, I would be reading this right now if I were not at my parents place for the weekend. To read later.
To be honest I liked the ambiguity of the first two, but I like your stories in general so I will definitely read this.
FIRST!
Oh, and that was AWESOME! moar pls!
1145256
Yeah, this is really an experiment. I was surprised that someone asked, so I wanted to make one. I have considered trying to write clop just once anyway.
1145262
Second, I'm afraid.
There is one other chapter. I'll post it next week.
Boiled alive in chocolate? Now that is a hell of a way to go
I can't clop to this...
I'm having t much fun!
I suppose this could indeed be dual use humor/clop. Bondage isn't really my thing though, so I was just snickering while imagining their playacting. Chocolate bathing seems more up my alley. We'll see if the next chapter is the opposite for me then.
Oh, this is a lot of fun! And Daring Do's hurt wing thing, I can totally see that happening.
I loled.
A few errors here and there, basic grammar but stuff spell check misses;
"...but hurting the prisoner seemed to be a privilege of her skull.faced captor." - Just a missed hyphen here.
"However, with the situation being what it was, they all turned real into her imagination..." - Should be just "in" I think, but I really don't know if I'm not wrong on that.
Other than those few errors, I sometimes felt the word "pussy" could have replaced by something else. I don't know why but I felt as though it was out of place. Maybe I have been reading too many other authors and too many varying styles.
Overall, I really enjoyed the flow of this story and all those little details about the ... production?
[Edited because I don't think I covered how much I enjoyed this one] Next week you say? I can't wait for the chocolaty goodness. Though now that I say that I'm worried that Pinkie might show up.
1146328
Thanks for the word notes and the praise!
I decided to censor a certain word for female genitalia, since I was uncertain of when to use it (yeah, despite this being porn). Pussy became the tamer alternative.
1147479
Augh, some proof-reader I turned out to be to miss those!
Seriously, this is a really funny story; sure it sacrifices some of the ambiguity of the earlier stories, but the result is great.
this is..yes.
i.imgur.com/nVqcv.gif
ok, you have it... like I said, it would be my perverse pleasure to fulfill my promise
1162938
Oh ho ho ho ho!
That was a sweet fic, it'd be family-friendly if our culture tolerated sex.
oh man ! i loved tmi and i loved this you are a great writer and it all flowed so neatly
media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m8cyheYRD51qgyybk.jpg
Every TMI has been great, but this, this was amazing.
I will just leave this here
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We're not worthy!
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you deserve much more than that
Ruins:
<<......
......>>
*slowly raises hoof*
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Psst! You know it's rude among cannibal caveponies to eat the garnish, right?
Two things ran through my mind
This one thought
25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m9hlb69qMk1qmmz6mo2_1280.jpg
And this one....
3.bp.blogspot.com/-getXApN-wI0/TZYa5ocAApI/AAAAAAAAAJY/c_uUiVzACRQ/s1600/room_wiseau_hows_your_sex_life.jpg
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I am not a cavepony, I am
slightlymostly insane alicorn!1210281
I am, of course, referring to your hosts and not you as a guest!
Damn, that's a pretty good story... any plans for the continuation of this series?
1213445
Not until I get more concrete ideas either for the Mane Six talking sex and relations OR those three in this story has a scenario they want to play (possibly one more in Rarity's taste).
I had to stop reading when there was chili on genitals...
In case you don't know, even low doses of capsaicin-containing substances, such as chili powder, can cause chemical burns even on skin, let alone mucous membranes. I suggest you try it for yourself.
1214738
Yeah, I know there is horrible pain (that was sort of the point), but I didn't think it was that bad. Hm. I should probably change that. Thanks for making a serious comment even on a not very serious fic.
1216783
Yeah, there's lots of cases when people think it's going to be a level of pain appropriate for some S/M play, or for a prank or whatever, and end up in the ER...
Besides that little point, I quite enjoyed this fic! i finished it today, and the rest was all good in my books.
1218315
I've had some less than joyful experiences like that myself, and feel rather embarrassed for missing what should be an obvious case. (At least they didn't use liquid rainbow!) As you can see I went to some pains, despite the less than realistic context, to show that the actual sex, compared to Dash's fantasy, is still somewhat plausible (Rarity constantly checking if her sub hasn't been tied up too long, etc.) so that doubled the embarassment.
I'll rewrite it so that an unspecify spice is used (because I liked the scene) other than "no, that was NOT chili, wouldn't want to actually hurt you".
Edited:
I read TMI a long time ago. Didn't know there were sequels.
This is easily one of the best erotica I have ever read, anywhere, including published works.
It depicts a realistic sexual roleplay session with plenty of fun kink. And the characters are so healthily enjoying themselves, I don;t even notice most of the fetishes aren't mine, other than roleplay itself.
After reading other comments on the chilli: I recommend rather than role playing it, you substitute with either mint or ginger. Both are also used with chocolate and both also create a burning (and in mint's case, inverse cooling under right stimuli, for instance that cream) without the chance of tissue damage.
There was a relative lack of description throughout that made it hard to understand some of the logistics of what was going on.
I would also say that I don't completely agree with some of the sexual philosophy and could nit pick some technicalities about anatomy and some such.
1263511
But IIRC I have seen your comments on other authors, and you just happen to be thorough.
First, you had a lot of complaints for something you apparently thought was good.
I recommend rather than role playing it, you substitute with either mint or ginger. Both are also used with chocolate and both also create a burning (and in mint's case, inverse cooling under right stimuli, for instance that cream) without the chance of tissue damage.
Good tip! I was just going to change it to an unnamed "spice", but that's better. This is the only thing I'm going to change, btw, because of the comments earlier on the danger of something like chili. I found no other of your comments critical enough to change my story in any way.
I find it hard to believe that Dash held an enema for that long without severe discomfort. Perhaps the punchline could be changed to something along the lines of "I've got one banana left, do either of you fillies want it?" or "Do either of you fillies want my last banana?" To imply she already purged her backdoor.
She didn't have to hold an enema, since the "stuffing" is described as having poured out even as it was injected into her and not much was left. I assume it would be a relief for her to go and shit out broken pieces of banana, but...
When do Twi and Rarity achieve their orgasms? With Dash or later when they are 69ing?
Later. They were busy cooking her; I've often found attention to a sex partner like that means I pay less attention to myself. Note that the Daring Do part describes the tribe starting an orgy; that represents Twi and Rare having sex while RD "cooks".
For the only penetrative sex scene in the fic, and incredibly hot and kinky to boot, it was disappointingly short and lacked detail.
This is probably right, and could have been better as you describe. It's probably because I find penetrating sex rather uninteresting. The interest can be increased if a live penis, preferrably mine, is involved, and it's not to say I enjoy it in reality, but it usually bores me in porn.
The "stuffer", based on your description, is basically a dildo crossed with a pumpkin (turkey) baster. If so how did it hold enough fluid to "ejaculate" constantly during what must have been a several minute session?
Twilight refilled it from a bowl, of course. This could have been described better.
The bananas: were they fully inserted into the orifices or only half way? I ask because if it was half way the vaginal one likely fell out and the anal one likely got "pinched" in half or pushed out. A compromise could be the vaginal one going in about 3/4 and being very big and the anal one not being peeled.
This is the sort of detail I don't really feel enhances the experience, but I intended them to be pushed almost fully in and peeled; I've seen it (don't ask) and it would work... the unpeeled one in the backhole I find strangely appealing, but if we're looking at details them being both peeled and both unpeeled is more aesthetically pleasing, and Rarity is the head chef here...
The anal should not have hurt that much. Maybe a bit of stretching burn on the first thrust, but not real pain. The pain would only occur if the phallus was too big (and Twi shrank it), the recipient was clamping down (and Dash was willing) or the anus/phallus were not lubricated (and Twi and rarity would never do that because that could cause tearing). Otherwise the phallus entering should not be more uncomfortable than a large bowel movement. That's different from by first experiences of anal sex back when I had a relationship with another man. No, it doesn't have to hurt, but it often does a bit the first few times, and even if Twi knows how to do it in theory she wasn't prepared to do it right then and is no expert. And the "batter" is probably not the world's best lube. Far too often anal sex is treated far too casually in porn by people who lack actual experience, and I prefer to not go down that route.
Why did Twi feel the need to shrink the dildo? It was never indicated to be anything larger than regular penis size. If it was oversize that should have been made clear, if not it should have had few problems penetrating Sash's anus since if a stallion can... Unless Twi just wanted to make it easier on her, which is silly since she asked for it and the only thing more paralyzing and humiliating than the feeling of being anally violated is the feeling of having something BIG in there.
Because I didn't describe it well enough; it was supposed to be Bic Mac-sized. Mea culpa.
Dash's statement about anal for females being a male fetish and not rewarding due to no prostate, then only getting off on the pain, is bullshit. Lack of prostate for anal is like vaginal without clitoral stimulation. Yes it's less rewarding and you're less likely to come, but it still feels really good due to nerve endings. MANY women masturbate anally.
I'm going from the exact descriptions of women's reactions to the prevalence of anal sex in heterosexual porn. Women who I know well and also use to have anal sex, so I have reason to believe them.
1264947
I'm glad I can provide some clarifications, then!
Part of my work is based on either myself or people I know, just like most authors. F'rinstance, Rainbow Dash's fetish is very much based on one had by a woman I know; her favorite fantasy is essentially being a jungle heroine like Shanna the She-Devil (or a female Tarzan, to make it easier) who is subjected to mortal peril from cultists, cannibals, white slavers, etc but always escapes through her courage and strength. She is never literally sexually abused, which is the main difference from how I imagined RD's fantasies (well, except for imagining being Indiana Jones instead of Tarzan). When having my mind meandering I realized I use this as a seed for a short story based on RD's feelings about this, which became TMI 2. I know another woman who likes to fantasize about being a victim of jungle cannibals and told me something about roleplaying this with a partner; when people wanted me to make an actual clopfic based on RD's realized fantasies, I started off with what she told me, though it ended rather different. For one thing, Daring Do was a sweet dessert, while she was the main course. For another, hers was a snuff fantasy where she actually was eaten in the end, so the roleplay was of more vicious things her husband pretended to do ("And now I will eat your arm!" *love bites*), whereas Rarity and Twilight never really even pretend to do harmful things to RD after the spanking scene. (The chili thing was a mistake on my part.) I actually had a reason I chose a cannibal fantasy as the theme instead of, say, being sacrificed or enslaved, and that was that I could justify prolonged physical "torture" in a different way. The other alternative was some sort of physical initiation to avoid being killed or something like that. "You must withstand seven forms of torment to join the tribe!" All the torments being something not-dangerous and vaguely sexual, of course. This is different from the distress Daring Do suffer in the books, but it is harder to turn into a sexgame. Sure, Rarity and Twilight could pretend to be Ahuizotl's henchmares and tie her to a papier mache bomb, but it was harder for me to visualize this as anything except helping RD to clop about the thing (instead of RD engaging in some self bondage).
1266151
Both, but it also depends on the circumstances. I tend to prefer the Comedy tag in both circumstances, and have the weird tendency to like things less then when it's recommended to me(?!).
1267726
It's a quirk of mine - when people say "You HAVE to read this!" I activate my orbital satellite defense systems and instinctively dislike the book. Don't know why.
Anyway, I've read that one!
Awesome story. I really loved the way that you made it a somewhat realistic fantasy instead of making it look like the real thing. I really loved the way that you had Rainbow/Daring escape.
1272569
That's one of the things that only really matters if you do know the details - I'm actually more concerned that Twilight isn't barfing up hair, given that erotic licking and foodsex cannot be half as fun when your partner has a furry coat. Likewise, sticking said ball of fur and feathers directly in the soup... the correct way for a sadistic cannibal to cook Daring Do alive is of course wrapped in clay like a hedgehog!
Well, I'm going to just say that like the vomit reflex or their very flexible limbs, that's something that separates mylittleponies from real ponies.
1273309
Honey is sticky, that's the point of the exercise. More importantly, this is again the question of "what you perceive automatically" being more important than "anatomically correct according to scientific analysis". While less hairs, factually speaking, might end up in my mouth when I lick a horse than when I lick one of my cats, I'm still not going to do it. It's the immediate perception that feels natural. To take another example, it's the hoof thing vs the legs thing. Bronies often complained when ponies use hooves as if they have fingers (a common phenomenon in cartoons, but something the animation team tries to avoid - but sometimes they can't).They much rarely complain about the ponies' limb movement, despite the fact that a facehoof 
should be impossible. But it's not "naturally" clear that it should be impossible, unlike Octavia grabbing the bow to her cello (or whatever it is).
I THINK that when you pour honey on a horse, you would get more hairs in your mouth when you lick it off than when you pour it on a human (or pig!)
1273540
I'm just gonna cut off this discussion now. I'll let you get the last word, let's just say that you're rather infuriating in ways I think you already know. You're making me sad and angry and considering pulling this story which I liked a lot with you nitpickng, so I'm just gonna jump off before I say or do something too mean and stupid.
I really thought this was one of the better romance-clopfics out there that include more than 2 ponies. What I so particulary like about this is that it keeps every pony in character, but also keeps their friendship intact and in-character. You can see the shared friendship, that they have fun and are enjoying themselves, without endangering or changing the relationship between any of the participants. It's rare to see it done this well, and I really liked it. Of course, the fact that we have had two stories leading up to this clop helps a lot. It added depth and a certain amount of character development to this story, which is always a good thing. Would that more clop was like this! Thus, I can only conclude: well done! Thumbs up and favourited.
1145521
worst ways to go.
1145521
worse ways to die.
I only have one way to comment this.
[Link]
Talk about eating out.
Great job with this, this is definitely worth a fave.
1514545>>1452183
Thanks, both of you.
1514549
Quite welcome! I'm looking into the rest of your stuff now.
This is one of the most fun and entertaining clopfics I've ever come across. Good job.
1676852
Thanks - and thanks for the fave. I'm not that fond of it myself anymore, but it's very pleasant when someone who likes your work take their time to tell you so!