Chapter 6
Sunset Shimmer stumbled out of the portal and fell to her hands and knees. She remained on the sidewalk, staring at the concrete for several minutes trying to get ahold of her volatile emotions. Tears slipped down her nose to the concrete and she shuddered with the occasional gasping sob. Thankfully, in the summertime pre-dawn hours there was no one to see or question her.
Celestia was her mother, her REAL mother who gave birth to her. And she hid it for years! She was born the daughter of the Princess of the Sun and never allowed to live the life she should have. Sunset had lost count of the number of times she had secretly wanted to call Celestia, “Mom.” How many times had she wanted to say, “I love you,” but it was inappropriate? A certain decorum was to be maintained in the presence of others. Even in private, when they could sneak in a hug or private moment a wall had existed. Their relationship had been one of student and teacher, lukewarm and professional.
Two distinct moments flashed through Sunset’s mind. An angry, spoiled unicorn demanding wings and princess status from the teacher she had once loved more than anypony else in the world juxtaposed against the same alicorn who was once ageless, breaking down and sobbing. Begging for forgiveness.
Sunset got to her feet and stormed over to her motorcycle parked nearby, angrily wiping her nose and tear stained face. She put on her helmet and tore off into the night with a stripe of black and burnt tire smell in her wake. She was too angry to go home. Anger was welling up inside and it needed release and if she screamed her lungs out at her apartment no doubt even her understanding neighbors would call the police. There was only one place she could go.
Years ago, when Sunset had been unsure if her doctored paperwork would hold up to further scrutiny, she had planned for the eventuality of having to run from the authorities until the portal opened again. She had found a secluded section of the Everfree Forest park that bordered the lake that sat in the middle. Sunset found the spot serene and comforting and would have given her a few days to hide and gather the necessary resources to try starting life again somewhere else. And so she dug a sizeable hole and buried a weatherproof storage crate full of camping supplies, clean clothes, nonperishable foods, some cash, and even a few Equestrian bits that could be pawned if needed.
Every now and then Sunset would come out to her hideout and set up the tent and to check the state of her supply cache, but later, also for fun. She even brought Twilight a few months ago so they could stargaze and watch for meteors away from most of the city’s light pollution. That was a good night, a good memory.
Even in the early hour darkness Sunset knew the way through the woods to her hidden sanctuary. It took only minutes to set up a small campfire and the quick deploy tent, but Sunset’s mind was still racing to process all that had been revealed. Instead of sitting by the fire, Sunset paced along the shore, kicking a rock into the lake. She reached down and picked up another and threw it as far as she could. Then another and another, some the size of bricks and soccer balls. This culminated in Sunset letting out a guttural scream to the heavens.
“WHAT AM I?!” She sank to her knees, ignoring the wet soil soaking through her pants. There was no answer to her plea aside from the creatures of the night going about their business. Not long ago, once she had gotten established and had a chance to indulge her curiosity, Sunset had taken to the internet. This mirror dimension was populated with creatures, though physically and culturally different, many were mirrors of ponies she had known. Sunset’s brain had frozen up and she nearly had a panic attack when she first met one Principal Celestia. Since that encounter, Sunset had spotted several other humans who shared names and similar traits to ponies she had known in Equestria. However, no online searches or old fashion record combing ever revealed the presence of a human Sunset Shimmer. And now she knew why. She was a unique entity in the multiverse, born from near immortal beings from two different dimensions.
Twilight would have loved to have heard that. Especially when she was in the 'science zone' like she had been during many of their study sessions at school or the occasional magic investigation. Even during their night stargazing, Twilight had happily discussed her knowledge of astronomy, comparing what she knew to Sunset’s general knowledge of the subject. Thoughts of Twilight and that night, cuddled close under a blanket with cocoa and her telescope, cooled some of the raging fury in her aching heart.
Sunset sat down in her tent, exhausted and drained from all that had transpired over the last two days. She pulled out her phone, always a bit amazed she had even a small signal in the middle of the forest. Sunset typed out a message to Twilight and then erased it. This process repeated several more times until she growled and powered down her phone with the words, “I need you,” still in the draft text window. Dreamless sleep soon claimed her.
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Twilight grunted again as Spike nudged her with his nose and poked her with a well manicured paw. “Come on, Twilight, I’m hungry. It’s not like you to sleep so late. You’re not sick, are you? Do I need to call mom or dad or Shining Armor?”
Twilight rolled over and grabbed her glasses from the nightstand by her bed, eyes blinking into focus on her beloved canine companion. “No, Spike, I’m just lost in thoughts.”
“Is this about you going out the other night with Timber?”
Twilight nodded, eyes downcast. “I tested a hypothesis, as it were. I’m having trouble processing the data.”
“From what I’ve seen on TV they usually just call that a bad date,” Spike paused, tapping his chin. “Was it his smell? He always smells of dirt and pine, occasionally of squirrels, which is weird and makes me want to chew on his leg, but only a little.”
Twilight rolled her eyes, but smiled scratching his chin. Despite his magically boosted intelligence and ability to communicate, Spike was still just a dog. There was beauty in that simplicity she supposed. Maybe he was right though, Timber did have an outdoors smell to him that he sometimes tried to hide when he came to her house to visit. It had slowly been losing its appeal since those early days at Camp Everfree. Twilight put on some loose, lazy day lounge clothes and headed down stairs taking a glance at her clock, which read just after eleven. Spike was right, she rarely slept pass nine even on a day off.
“So, what was the hypothesis?”
Twilight set out the dog food in his bowl then made a bowl of cereal for herself. “It’s… difficult to explain and not just because you’re a dog. I have been feeling different ever since the Friendship Games and I thought I knew what I wanted, especially after I started dating Timber. Now, I’m not sure.”
Spike looked up after swallowing a bite. “Well, if you and Timber mated I can understand why you feel different. You’ll probably have puppies soon.”
Twilight dropped her spoon and had to get up to wash it off. “We… We took precautions, there will be no puppies! Why would you even say that?!”
“I don’t see what the big deal is. You like him, he likes you, he mounts you and then… BAM! Then there are puppies. At least that’s the way it works in the nature shows I’ve watched.” Twilight rubber her temples. Who taught him how to use the TV remote? “You’re lucky, I can’t have puppies since you took me to the vet that one time. At least that was before I ran into that magical cloud at CHS. I don’t remember much other than some really basic stuff from before then.”
“Yeah. The games changed both our lives pretty dramatically. I want to think for the better, but having your whole world perception shattered is still, well, shattering. I… I just don’t see certain people the same way anymore. Some of the things I thought I wanted are now… different.” Twilight checked her phone. Not surprised she had missed calls and text messages from Rarity and Pinkie Pie. She would have to apologize to all of them later, but was not in the mood to do so yet. Nothing from Sunset, who was probably still in Equestria, she thought.
Twilight was startled from her thoughts by the sound of a ringing that reminded her of her grandmother’s old rotary bell phone that she used to use. Her eyes darted around the room and on the corner of the countertop was a leather-bound book that was glowing and vibrating slightly. Sunset’s Journal! Twilight had forgotten it had been dropped off yesterday morning.
With the grace of a giraffe in roller skates, Twilight stumbled from the breakfast bar, tripped over the stool, spun on one foot, and then scrambled over to slide on the hardwood floor. Poor traction in her socks caused her to slide and stub her toe on an end table. After a few hops and small curses, she finally made it to the journal and opened to the last page with a huge grin she had not realized she had. The giddiness however faded to disappointment and then confusion and finally concern when she had read who the message was from.
Hello? Sunset Shimmer? I don’t know if you have your journal with you, but if you do please, please, please respond! I’m heading over through the mirror and need to talk to you about what happened. Starlight gave me the quick review of what was said and I don’t even know where to begin! But I know you need a friend. Please, tell me you are okay!
Twilight read the words twice. They must have been from her counterpart, Princess Twilight. But what did they mean, was Sunset in trouble? Twilight shook her head and grabbed a pen. She had seen Sunset use just a normal click pen so it should work for her as well.
Hi, it’s me, you… Twilight I mean. I should have written a draft first. Anyhow, what’s going on? Sunset said she would be back in a day or so but she didn’t come see me for her journal and she hasn’t called. Did something happen to her on your side of the mirror?
It would take too long to explain and I don’t know how much time we have. I need your help. Please come meet me at the portal. Get the other girls if you can or just come yourself, whichever is faster. Sunset had some life altering revelations dropped on her and really should not be alone right now. I can only hope she has not hurt herself.
Twilight shuddered as cold spread through her thoughts and body. Sunset needed help, nothing else mattered at the moment. She let out a breath and steeled her emotions.
I’m coming. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.
Twilight slammed the book closed and ran upstairs to change her clothes and grab her shoes. She brushed her teeth and hair in record time, tying the ponytail up with a scrunchie from the floor. Twilight nearly fell down the stairs trying to slide her running shoes on while hopping down the steps. She stashed the journal in a shoulder tote bag to bring along. Lastly, she put her geode necklace on and felt the familiar thrum of power and warmth that always accompanied it.
“Is something wrong?” Spike asked, having relocated to the couch.
“I know we usually go for a walk at this time, but an emergency came up with my friends. I’ll make it up to you. Only go out back and keep the front door locked.”
Spike cocked his head. “Do you want me to come with you?”
Twilight smiled warmly at her first true friend. “I have to drive a little crazy, probably best if you stay home.”
“Just be careful.” Twilight nodded and ran out to her car, keys in hand.
It was not nice, or fast, or particularly comfortable. A simple, white, four door, compact sedan that served its purpose of moving Twilight back and forth to work or around town. Twilight had called it practical and fuel efficient and it came with great reliability reviews. Sunset had called it a, “Four banger shoebox,” when Twilight first showed it to her. At first Twilight had been annoyed at the criticism, but it had been said playfully and Sunset had done a thorough review of the car top to bottom making sure it was as good as Twilight had said it was. They had even sat down afterwards and read the owner’s manual together. Rainbow had called them nerds and laughed at their diligence.
Twilight shook her head to focus her thoughts and pulled the car out into the street, putting her foot down and receiving a small bark of protest from the economy tires. They didn’t matter. One of her friends was in trouble and that’s all that mattered.
Just over fifteen minutes later Twilight stopped in front of CHS where a very familiar looking girl was sitting on one of the park benches. She wore pretty blue button down with a pink bow at the collar, purple skirt and knee high purple boots. Despite numerous tests and attempts to investigate neither herself, the pony princess, or Sunset had been able to determine where the clothes from the portal came from or where they were stored. The best that could be hypothesized was they were stored in a pocket realm. Sunset had tried to explain to her about the, “places between places,” but even her scientific and analytical mind stalled out from time to time.
Princess Twilight walked over to the car after being waved at. Twilight opened the door from the inside and the princess slid in, securing the seatbelt upon request. “Thanks for coming.”
Twilight turned her eyes back to the road and threw the princess back into the chair with a yelp as she sped away towards Sunset’s apartment. “Um…”
“No questions about my driving,” Twilight said, eyes never leaving the road. “Tell me what happened to Sunset.” Princess Twilight relayed the story word for word as it had been relayed to her from both Starlight Glimmer and Princess Celestia. As Twilight listened, she squeezed and released the steering wheel several times as a therapeutic means of controlling her anger and anxiety. The silver lining of having to listen to heart-wrenching drama that her dear friend had recently gone through it took Twilight’s mind off her own problems for a time. Poor Sunset, Twilight thought. She could only imagine what her friend was feeling right now. As the princess wrapped up the story, the pair arrived outside Sunset’s townhome apartment. Princess Twilight made to exit the car but her human counterpart placed her hand over the seatbelt release.
“Something’s wrong. Shadow is missing.”
“Is that a guardian or pet?”
Twilight’s face twitched for a moment into a savory smile. She knew something her pony princess counterpart didn’t. It was petty and fleeting, but it still felt good. “It’s her motorcycle. If she were here it would be under the tarp on the left. You said she got in late last night, the storage lot wouldn’t have let her in after midnight and I doubt she would have gotten up just to put it away if she was as heartbroken as you described.”
“But that was hours ago, she may have moved it. We should go check just to be sure.”
Twilight gave her doppelganger a half lidded stare over the top of her glasses. Princess Twilight stared back, but her expression was more confusion and full of worry. Twilight pulled out her phone and tried Sunset’s number again. She had tried it once a few red lights ago and had gone straight to voice mail. Once again, same result. Twilight let out a long breath.
“This is starting to become dangerously serious.”
“I know!” Twilight shouted, catching the princess by surprise.
“Look, I know you’re worried too, but is there something you need to talk about? You’ve been particularly aggressive since I climbed in your carriage.”
“Car. It’s called a car. And no, I don’t want to talk about it.” Twilight pinched the bridge of her nose. If Sunset was not at home and not at work where else would she go? One of their friend’s houses? Possibly, but for something this serious wouldn’t she have come to her first? Just to be safe Twilight shot a message across their group chat window that she never closed.
Hey, sorry if it feels like I’m avoiding everyone, I’m not! I just have some things going on, but that’s not important right now! I need to know if Sunset is at one of your houses. She came back last night and is now off the grid. Please let me know ASAP.
“Twilight,” Princess Twilight said as gently as possible, “I know we’re not the same person, but we have many similarities. I can read all your physical cues as if I were looking in the mirror. I don’t know what I did to offend you, but if you talk to me, I know we can work it out. We need to work together to find Sunset.”
Find Sunset. Find Sunset in a place she doesn’t want to be found. Twilight thought about all her quiet moments with her fire haired best friend. The fleeting moments when it was only the two of them. They were rare, usually there was always another friend or more around, which was not bad, but it made those moment’s precious. Twilight closed her eyes and her mind immediate conjured a white space like a pocket dimension, a beautiful, golden winged angel with a glowing horn reaching out to her. Trying to save Twilight even after she had been gleefully tearing the world asunder in pursuit of magic. The goldenrod skinned angel’s dress and hair waved in the ethereal breeze, gorgeous teal eyes full of empathy.
Twilight’s mind left the daydream, next focusing on a moment not long ago. The two of them side by side, cheeks playfully pressed together as they traded off looking through the eyepiece of Twilight’s telescope. It was such a beautiful night with plenty of glorious starts and even a few meteors streaking across the midnight sky. It was beautiful, Sunset had been beautiful without even trying. They made smores and talked about what it would be like to travel to different planets, which always made Twilight giddy. Sunset had said it was a special place and that it was a closely guarded secret. She had shared it only with Twilight.
Violet eyes behind glasses snapped open and she put the car in gear again. “I think I know where she is.” Five returned text messages all confirming that Sunset was not with any of their close friends only solidified her resolve. Twilight reassured their friends she would explain later then pulled back out onto the street.
“Okay, that’s good,” the princess said, but then began to fidget, “but may I ask why you’re all the sudden blushing?” Twilight growled under her breath. The silence permeated for several minutes until it was too much and the Equestrian had to say something. “Please, talk to me.”
“Why you? Why did you come to help Sunset and not her mother? You would think if Celestia really was so concerned for her daughter she would have come herself. It's just... wrong does not seem like a strong enough word, but I can't think of anything more appropriate at the moment.”
“She desperately wanted to, but it’s not that simple. The princess has an entire kingdom to run. Sure, Luna will be there to help, but part of being in charge also means delegating. Not to mention she is trying to help fix the mirror magic, which she is infinitely more qualified to do than I.
“I know I sound like I’m making excuses for her, I’m trying not to! What she did, hiding this from her own daughter is horrible. Sweet star filled night, I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that Princess Celestia has a daughter at all! But you would understand if you had seen the turmoil on her face. Celestia rarely shows any emotions beyond what is expected of her for court. This entire ordeal has hurt her as much as Sunset, which again, not making excuses, but that was probably why she never said anything before. More important that any of that, Sunset is my friend. I would have jumped through even if Celestia had not begged me to help her.”
Twilight took a turn harder than she should have and made the tires squeal. The princess was thrown into the door, the panic evident on her face. Once they were no longer pulling G forces Twilight said with just a bit more force than necessary, “Define your relationship with Sunset for me.”
Princess Twilight arched her eyebrow and cocked her head in a manner that was similar to Sunset, must have been an Equestrian thing, Twilight thought. The princess only took a moment to gather her thoughts. “We’re friends. Good friends, but that’s it. May I ask why?”
Twilight ignored the question moving onto her next one. “That’s it? You don’t have any romantic feelings for her?”
“What? No. I mean, she is a beautiful mare, gorgeous really. I am totally jealous of her curves and I don’t know if it’s hereditary or magic or what, but her mane has this bounce and wave to it that reminds me of flickering fire. It’s… well you know, wow! She somehow makes, ‘I just crawled out of bed,’ still look amazing. I know many stallions and mares would love to get to know her romantically, but I’m not one of them. I just don't have time for such things and that would make me a horrible romantic partner for anypony.” Princess Twilight chuckled lightly, beginning to theorize what was going on. “If anything, I think of Sunset as more of a surrogate sister. We were both students of Celestia and have been pawns and tools to her machinations in dealing with the Canterlot elite. The disaster that is the Grand Galloping Gala comes to mind. We love magic and discussing books, but that’s really where the similarities end. Which is fine, because then we compare our different approaches to science and magic and application versus theory. We play well off each other. As I’m sure you and her complement each other as well if not more so.”
Twilight stole a glance to her right and spied a mischievous smile on the princess’s face. “I like to think so. Sunset is amazing, but her and I? It’s… complicated. I have a boyfriend, had… we’re on a break while I figure some things out for myself. But that’s not going to help us. I’m not important right now, not until I know she’s safe.”
Princess Twilight gently placed a hand on her counterpart’s shoulder. “You’re important to Sunset and all your friends. I know that for certain.”
“Oh?”
“You should know she talks about you, a lot. Asks me for advice in the hope that she might skim some inside information from a dimensional counterpart I imagine. I help where I can, but like I said, we’re similar just not same. I know she loves being in this world and being with all of you. She talks about the technology and things I can’t even describe like gaming and blogging. Whatever that is. But I think she’s afraid of being left behind. She hasn’t out right said it, but I get the feeling your lives are about to change. That your friends are going their own directions.”
“We finished high school. For most people our age that means college. Some just go right into the working field, others join the military or something similar like a trade school. It means moving on, hopefully not apart, but it does happen.”
Princess Twilight nodded. “I can see that. That would scare me too. I’ve come to rely on the advice and companionship of my friends that not being able to see or speak with them regularly would be soul crushing.”
“She went to you to ask about staying in Equestria more than here. She’s afraid of being left behind while we all move to the next stage. Without legal paperwork she runs a risk of being caught by immigration authorities.”
“I don’t know what that is, but if that’s what scares her so much that she feels she has to leave you should find a way to help make it right,” Princess Twilight said matter-of-factly. “I know she would rather stay here most of the time.”
Twilight grimaced, almost missing her exit, but regained her focus. “She’s still a unicorn in her heart. I forget that most days, but it’s still a fact. Why wouldn't she choose a magical land of wonders over… this?”
“This place has a magic all its own and I don’t mean the energy and artifacts from Equestria.” The princess paused gesturing to the car and the view outside. “Although, I think what really draws her to this place now is not what it has, but whom.” Twilight digested the comment and focused on the road signs.
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Sunset sat on a cut log staring over the nearly placid lake. She had tried sleeping in, but her mind never ceased and had only managed a few hours of intermitted rest before finally giving up and putting her clothes back on to collect water to boil for cleaning herself up and brushing teeth. Sunset was sure her hair was still a ragged mess, but the local fauna didn’t care and at the moment neither did she.
Little trips like this often helped remind her what was missing from the supply stash. For one, no coffee and number two, no hair brush. Both would have to be rectified in the future. “Heh,” Sunset let out a joyless laugh. “Like I have a future that matters anymore.”
It was difficult to contemplate something as uncertain and ever changing as the future on a normal day. Sure, one could make plans, alter or adapt said plans. Sunset had once been good at making plans or schemes… depended on the day. Twilight was good at making plans too. She loved planning every little detail and then triple checking the plan for any possible missing variables.
Thoughts of the purple nerd made her sigh. Sunset placed her face in her hands. What was she supposed to do now? The future was more a blur than ever, the mirror was unstable, and thanks to last night she did not know which world would be more difficult to live in. The one where she would always struggle to get by or the one where her mother figure was her actual mother and had pushed Sunset away to, “protect her,” and lied to her most of her life.
In a demented sort of way, the ruthless part of Sunset’s logic brain understood what Celestia had tried to do. Nightmare Moon, once believed to be just an old mare’s tale had been real. And Celestia had not wanted to fight her sister again, risking another banishment or worse. So, she crafted a weapon to protect Equestria just in case. That made sense, but the problem was SHE had been that weapon. And when the weapon became unruly and uncooperative Celestia had tried to discipline her like one would a bad pet instead of a child. Kick her outside for a short time until the weapon had learned who was boss. It had been a failure and tragedy for both of them.
Sunset’s attention was snapped back to reality as voices drew near. She stood, eyes focused on the thick bushes and a moment later, much to her startled surprise, Twilight appeared. Only to be surprised once again when another Twilight, slightly taller and without glasses joined her. The three stared at one another, Sunset eventually gave a half hearted wave and forced smirk.
“Hey.”
Twilight stepped up to Sunset, struggled with what to do. She wanted desperately to hug her friend, but at the same time start pounding on her for making everyone worry. Finally, she waggled her finger while scowling. “Did you know your phone is off and we were worried sick about you!”
Sunset reached into her pocket and chided herself. She switched it back on. “Sorry, I… I had a really bad night.”
“Celestia and Starlight told me,” said Princess Twilight, who remained back several feet. “I don’t know if it was my place or not, but I also told her. I felt she had a right to know.”
Sunset flinched, stepping back from both Twilights. Her expression fell, fighting back tears she thought she had finished with as she shoved her hands into her jacket pockets. “Then you know. You know the ugly truth of what I am and what she did to me. I use to brag and boast I was something special, I had no idea how wrong I was. I was just another tool in the magical shed that Celestia thought might have use some day. No, I’m worse than that.”
Twilight shook her head. “Please don’t.”
Sunset just continued right over her small protest. “Tools have a purpose, I’m a damn guard dog bitch who was bred for war that outlived its usefulness the moment it snapped at its master. Master, yeah, that’s a better way to describe her because she sure as hell wasn’t a mother to me!”
“Sunset.”
“I was so afraid for the longest time to see her and apologize to her for MY behavior and in all the time it was SHE who should have apologized to me! But noooooo, she just buried it and smiled and waved. I said I was fucking sorry to her and she just gave me that smile and said she missed me and I CRUMBLED! She gave birth to me! I was born a princess and denied everything because it didn’t fit into the grand plan of kum ba yah and harmony. I didn’t know the plan! But I pushed through, oh sweet heavenly stars did I push. I pushed myself to be the best, I pushed others away who would slow me down, and I pushed her for the truth and she told me I was not ready! Because her precious weapon would not follow when told! This bitch had teeth and would bite!”
“Please stop,” Twilight begged.
Sunset huffed, tears streaming down her face. “I have no place in two worlds. I have no future. I am a broken, discarded, and no matter how hard I try I will never be good enough for anyone!”
“STOP INSULTING YOURSELF!” Sunset sucked in a breath taken aback at Twilight’s outburst. Tears were welling up in her eyes and Princess Twilight was not sure who to comfort, electing to stay back and wring her hands or fiddle with the hem of her skirt.
“Twi…”
“No! You don’t get to scare me half to death and then belittle yourself, not until I get to say my piece. I have been on a knife’s edge of a nervous breakdown for more than a day. I am stressed, exhausted, and going out of my mind trying to sort everything that is emotionally tearing me up and the one person I need the most, my angel, my rock, is going to try and tell me how useless she is? You’ll have to excuse my borrowing from Rainbow Dash’s vernacular but that is utter BULLSHIT!”
“Twilight… I… I don’t even know what I am.”
“Timber Spruce and I had sex.” Sunset looked up, her face more shocked at the blunt revelation than at the act itself. They had been together for a long time, it was inevitable. Heck, after one year of dating she and Flash had already had numerous sexual encounters and were already moving on to more inventive positions, locations, and accessories. Sunset was not sure why Twilight had said it, but the silence that followed had become decidedly painful. Twilight had been studying Sunset’s reaction and finally asked, “Does that bother you?”
“Well, I mean… that’s between you and him. I don’t know why you are bragging about it to me. You’re both consenting adults and if he makes you happy what does it matter?”
“Just say yes.”
Sunset frowned, shaking her head. “Don’t do this, Twilight. Relationships are hard enough. You don’t need me to ruin yours like I ruin everything.”
Twilight took a second to wipe her glasses clean, letting in and out a long slow breath. “I told you to stop insulting yourself.” Sunset just slumped and frowned, wondering how many rocks she would need to put in her pockets to be able to sink in the lake. The dark thought only lasted for a moment.
“Let me tell you a little story,” Twilight held up her hand, “No, don’t interrupt, I need to say this and you need to hear it.” Sunset relented and nodded. “I’m the only daughter in my immediate family tree. None of my uncles or aunts have girls, my few cousins are all boys. So naturally I was doted upon by, of course my parents, but also by one aunt on my mother’s side.
“Aunt Aubergine Glow is wealthy, inherited most of it from her late husband who died young of a rare heart condition. She never remarried and was thrilled when I was born because she always wanted a daughter of her own. Most of those dresses and jewelry you’ve seen in my room, the ones I didn’t alter to have pockets or utility belts, came from her. She wanted a perfect little princess. She bought me pink castle playsets, and pretend cooking and cleaning toys, and those creepy dolls you had to change diapers and pretend you were a mom. The point is, she wanted me to be what our society consider the ‘perfect little girl’. I wanted a chemistry set and she bought me a tea set. I went along with it because my mom asked me to and would later give me all the books I could dive into.”
“I don’t understand, perfect little girl? There’s no monarchy here or noble class, what was she trying to accomplish?”
“You don’t get it, you didn’t grow up here, neither of you did,” Twilight said, gesturing to the princess as well. “Girls are pressured from a very young age to meet certain… expectations. We are manipulated at a young age into wanting to be the little princess like we see in cartoon films, to want to wear makeup, do our hair and nails, and talk about boys till we blush. It’s our society, its changing little by little, but the older generations are just doing what was done to them.
“For the longest time I thought there was something wrong with me. I wasn’t interested in any of that or anyone, the thought of dating didn’t even occur to me. I felt no interest and Aunt Aubergine would just say, ‘give it time, you’ll meet the right boy,’ or something along those lines. Regardless, I had my own plans. I was going to be a scientist. I was going to make sense of the world and examine everything through critical thinking, mathematics, and logic. I would get my doctorate or two, be successful and then, maybe, I would focus on dating some smart, young man who could appreciate me and my intellect. We would get a nice house, a dog or two, and have a family as it’s expected of us.” Twilight paused so Sunset would look up and meet her eyes. “Then, I met you and my whole world changed.”
Sunset grimaced, eyes cast down to her feet. “I’m sorry, I ruined everything for you.” Surprisingly, Twilight let out a bark of a laugh. It was not humorous tone, but not harsh either. Twilight felt her heart lifting as she laid bare her long suppressed personal feelings and turmoil. She had not realized how much pain she had been holding onto.
Twilight finally smiled. “Don’t be. You have nothing to be sorry for. Change is the natural order of the world. Change is good when it calls the establishment into question. And after the most amazing, intelligent, beautiful, tenacious, angel from Heaven reached out to me at my darkest moment and took my hand, pulling me back from the abyss. I had so many questions. About everything.”
“But I broke the natural order of this world. I brought magic to life here and now it’s tearing it apart. You say change is good, but I brought only chaos.”
“Chaos is as much a part of the natural order as order. And sometimes, despite what my analytical brain might say sometimes, we all need a little bit of chaos in our lives. After the Friendship Games, for the first time in years, I felt alive! I had been going through the motions of a gray world and because of you and the girls I could finally see all the colors again. And with that came feelings I had never felt or had suppressed. It was frightening, and exciting and… out of curiosity, did you know Flash Sentry asked me out a few times?”
Sunset smirked, unsurprised. Princess Twilight however made a ‘humph’ noise before saying, “Well, it’s not like I have a right to be jealous. I mean, it was just a crush that I never pursued annnnd I’m interrupting and will shut up now.”
Twilight nodded her thanks. “Here was a guy, a good guy, a nice guy, and I felt nothing for him. I thought, well maybe he’s just not my type. Then one day, while waiting for Rarity to finish going through clothes she was trying on I thumbed through a swimsuit brochure next to the changing booth and found myself staring at the models more than the bikinis themselves.” Twilight paused to make sure Sunset’s eyes met hers again. She did not know where the confidence to keep going was coming from, but if she stopped, if she stumbled, she would never get the words out. “I was also imagining what you would look like in those skimpy two pieces.”
“Twi…”
“I had years worth of indoctrination telling me it was wrong to have such thoughts. That I’m not supposed to think that way about other girls or that I was just confused. Girls are supposed to want boys and as Aunt Aubergine would say, ‘it’s how it should be.’ I ignored it at first, a simple crush brought on by the heavenly image of you reaching to me and then Timber came along and showered me with interest and flirtation and I thought, here’s my chance. He’s cute, and funny, and smart, this will set these weird feeling straight. And for a time, he did, sort of. At least it felt that way and I still like him a lot. But that longing for you never went away. In fact, as we have matured, it got stronger. So, I finally agreed to take the next step in Timber and mine’s relationship even though I was terrified.”
Unsure, hesitant, but a burning in her heart compelled Sunset to step closer. Her hands shook as she opened her arms and Twilight launched herself into the waiting arms and cried. Twilight clutched her friend close, the warmth giving her the strength to finish.
“He… he was gentle, he didn’t hurt me, but I kept my eyes closed almost the entire time. I tried not to cry, but I know I did. He kept asking if I was okay and I would just nod and say, yes and to keep going, I had to know if it would get better and... it never did. It felt so wrong and I knew it was all me. Eventually, he… finished and I opened my eyes and I saw him inside me and… and I had to run to the bathroom to throw up. I felt so horrible for him.”
Sunset held Twilight and gently stroked her back as her shoulders trembled between sobs. “I’m sorry, Twilight. Your first time is supposed to be something special.”
Twilight nodded, face still pressed into Sunset’s leather jacket. “We talked about it a bit after I recovered, I told him how I felt… about what we did, and about you and it hurt him a lot. I could see it on his face. He’s a good guy and deserves to be happy and I knew I would not be able to give him that. Not when I’m in love with you.”
Sunset let out the breath she had not realized she had been holding. She knew she should say something romantic, provocative or at the very least reassuring so that Twilight knew for certain that she had feeling for her as well. Instead the only thing that came to mind was, “Wow.” All that education across two worlds and that’s the best you got? Sunset chided herself. You really did need a mom to hug you more. “I’m… speechless.”
Thankfully, Twilight just giggled, a soft, sweet chuckle that was reassuring that it would be alright. Sunset glanced up at Princess Twilight who had remained in place, but now sported a huge, ear to ear grin with her clasped hands in front of her face as if trying to suppress a squeal of delight. Princess Twilight next tried to gesture with her hands her approval, pointing with her index fingers. It was odd and Sunset must have made a face because she retracted the gesture. Unfortunately, the princess next used her two middle fingers while maintaining the gleeful smile on her face. Sunset gently shook her head and squinted her disapproval. Clearly, she had no idea what that gesture meant to people who used fingers regularly. Princess Twilight scrunched up her face as if trying to recall something and then purple eyes lit up with the, 'Ah ha!' Princess Twilight finally gestured with her thumbs and winked at her friend. It was probably something Rainbow Dash taught her. Sunset nodded in approval.
The quiet, intimate moment was interrupted however when Twilight’s and then Sunset’s phone both began to ring. Twilight checked her phone and said, “It’s Rainbow.”
“Mine’s from Rarity.” They each answered their calls. “Hey, sorry I didn’t check in, I was in a bad-“
“Normally I would love to hear about it, dear, but we have a problem!”
“Oh no,” Twilight said, her eyes meeting Sunset’s. “I found Sunset. We’re on our way!”
Sunset hung up, squaring her shoulders. “Rarity said there’s a monster emerging from a magical portal in Old Maple Park.”
“Rainbow said the same thing. But it will take us an hour to get there!”
Sunset smirked, quickly moving to disassemble her tent. “Maybe in your four banger, but Shadow can get me there in half that time.”
Twilight let out a sigh, but smiled. “I really need to come up with a name for my car so you will stop calling it, ‘four banger’. Honestly, it’s rude that people put such emphasis on horsepower and not enough-“
Sunset turned, placing a finger on Twilights lips. “Later, I will gladly talk about all the pros and cons of your choice later. We can even do spread sheets. But we have a magical monster to deal with.” Twilight nodded and beamed.
“What can I do to help?” Sunset looked at Princess Twilight and pointed to the smoldering ash that had been her camp fire.
“Douse that, please.”
Princess Twilight looked around for a bucket or cup or anything she could use to put water on the firepit, but there was nothing in the immediate vicinity. The princess finally found an empty drink bottle when a glob of water surrounded in magenta telekinetic magic floated past her from the lake and landed on the pit. Princess Twilight pouted, letting out a very horse like snort. “Show off.”
Twilight adjusted her glasses and flashed a toothy grin.
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Didn't this story used to be longer?
10280604
Considering this is the first time it has ever been written and is being published a week at a time so I can have it properly edited and is not done yet... nope it's as long as it needs to be.
Well, glad we got a bit of confirmation of SciSet. Maybe it'll help Sunny deal with the giant bag of trauma she's just gone through.
Not surprised at all when sci twi confused she loves sunset