Pandemic: Starting Over

by Halira

Chapter 37: Watch What You Say

I sat under the painting of Mister Wabash and his wife, huffing, and trying to catch my breath. My heart was thudding against my chest, and I felt like it would break through if it beat any harder.

"What's wrong, Auntie Sunset?" Líng asked as he touched a hoof to my leg, staring up at me with fearful eyes.

"Did someone try to hurt you?" Shǔguāng asked as he looked around. He seemed ready to charge and fight whoever the perpetrator was, even though he really couldn't do much against any real threat—maybe bite their ankles. Small as he was, he had a lion's heart.

Qīng Yǔ just sat and watched at me. She seemed on the verge of tears as well for some reason, even though nothing had happened to her. Perhaps she was distressed just because I was distressed.

Lántiān chose then to return up the basement stairs with a dusty glass jar tucked under one wing. She gave me an annoyed glare. "You are safe now, ma'am. The horrible monster has been captured. I will take it outside and release it."

I looked at the jar and inched away from her. She rolled her eyes and started walking to the front door. Before she reached the door, a loud knock sounded from it. She paused and looked at me. I wasn't really in a position to give coherent orders, and she groaned, set the jar down, and then opened the door.

Number stepped in with a smile, but her smile immediately fell off as she saw me. "Sunset? What happened? Are you alright? Do I need to call a doctor? Where's Mister Tibbs?"

Lántiān pointed to the glass jar. "Ma'am encountered a fearsome beast in the basement. I have captured it."

Number bent down and looked at the jar. She then cut her eyes to me. "That tiny little spider? Seriously?"

"Don't judge me!" I shouted. "Just get that thing out of here!"

The colts looked at one another in confusion. "Auntie Sunset is afraid of spiders?" each asked the other in concert as if the other brother was more informed than themself.

"Yes! I can't stand them!" I cried.

Lántiān snorted as she picked the jar up and walked out the door with it. Number looked almost embarrassed for me, but didn't say anything.

Shǔguāng joined his brother in laying hoof against me. "It's okay, Auntie Sunset. The spider is gone." Now I felt embarrassed, having to be comforted by foals because of my irrational fears.

Number cleared her throat. "Well, if you need a distraction, I bought you cookware and groceries. Give me a few minutes, and I can get them all in. It is just my driver and me, and I'm not going to make him do something he's not paid to do by asking him to haul all that stuff in." She glanced around. "I asked before, but no one answered. Where is Tibbs?"

"He's out somewhere on the grounds," I answered. "He is making sure everything dangerous that the foals could step on is clear from the front before we walk the outside grounds tomorrow. I can't keep them cooped up in here forever."

"Is there a pool?" Líng asked eagerly.

I shook my head. "Not that I saw." However, there were a fair number of dry fountains. I wondered how the plumbing worked and what it would take to get them operational.

"Oh," Líng said as his expression drooped. "We didn't get to swim in the pool at the other place."

Well, I had intended on them getting a chance to swim. It wasn't my fault that Wild had brought Bursa or that she ran us out of the condo as fast as she did.

"I'll figure out something for you," I assured Líng. "I know you love water. Maybe there is a community pool somewhere that we can visit." I paused a second to consider this. If this was an upscale neighborhood, it was probably all humans—except for us. They might not be too appreciative of ponies invading a community pool if there was one. Then again, being an affluent neighborhood, they likely had their own private pools. "Perhaps Wild will spring for an above ground pool—pony-sized."

"Can we get it today?" he asked eagerly.

I shook my head. "Wild can do a lot of things, but I doubt she could get a pool here and ready to use before dark. It may be a few days if it happens."

He bowed his head and pouted. "Oh."

"I'll make sure you get a long bath later before bed," I assured him. I highly doubted Líng would put up a fight like Méng had. I watched his expression brighten a little.

Lántiān walked back in and gave me a flat look. "I released the spider next to the well, ma'am. I tossed a small rock in the well while I was there and can inform you it has no water in it. Also, Mister Tibbs was out cleaning the yard and gave me an unpleasant look again. I don't trust him."

I sighed. "Your distrust of Malcomb has been noted. I'll be keeping an eye on him and may confront him about giving you dirty looks if I can catch him doing it."

Number cleared her throat. "Um, I might know why Tibbs is giving Lántiān dirty looks."

I arched an eyebrow. "And that reason is…?"

"I did a background check on him since he would be living near you," Number explained. "Many crystal ponies worked in rehumanization centers after ETS; Mister Tibbs was one of these ponies. A group of local Shimmerists took an extreme dislike to traitor ponies, and such a group assaulted him. He had severe injuries, most of which he eventually recovered from, but he permanently lost an eye in the attack. Lántiān's mark happens to include Shimmerist iconography, and I don't think he takes too kindly to Shimmerists."

"Well, not much can be done to help it if that's the case," I replied in resignation.

Lántiān narrowed her eyes and spread her wings slightly as she growled. "If he sided with those who tried to reverse what Sunset Shimmer did, then he deserved it, or worse."

I jumped to my hooves and slammed them down on the ground. "Shut the hell up, you insolent child! Even when I held to Shimmerist beliefs, I never stood in the way of anypony's self-determination!" That wasn't entirely true. There had been one time, but only one. "They had the right to choose to rehumanize, and he had a right to help them with that process!"

Number raised a hoof. "Sunset, your pronouns are—"

"I don't give a damn about my pronouns right now!" I seethed. I knew she was trying to distract me and cool me down, but I wasn't having it. I pointed a hoof at Lántiān. "This faithless daughter continues to expound not only the doctrines of those that killed her mother, but the worst forms of those beliefs. Her mother must be rolling in her grave with shame! She deserves every nasty look she gets!"

"Sunset, your temper, you need to control it. The younger foals are right here, listening to what you say," Number pleaded.

I turned to the other three. Shǔguāng was staring down at the ground, refusing to make eye contact with anyone. Líng was turning a horrified gaze back and forth between his sister and me. Qīng Yǔ chose that moment to start bawling her eyes out.

"M-Mama is...d-dead?" Líng asked in a trembling voice.

My rage vanished. "Líng…"

He got to his hooves and backed away from all of us. "<It's not true.>" he whispered, falling back into Mandarin. "<She…she just went away somewhere. She talked to me last night! You're lying!>"

"She's not lying, stupid," Shǔguāng growled, still not lifting his head to look at anyone.

Lántiān extended a wing out to her brother with a look of pity and sorrow on her face. "Líng, come here, and we can talk about this."

He backed further away. "<Get away from me! You- you made Mama…>" He couldn't complete the sentence. He just started blubbering and sobbing.

"I know it hurts, but you—" Lántiān said as she advanced toward her brother.

Líng turned and ran up the stairs. "<Go away!>"

"Líng!" I shouted as he scampered up the stairs and quickly out of sight. "Dammit!"

Lántiān spread her wings as if she was going to go flying after him, but I lit my horn and forcibly grounded her, angry at myself for not doing the same with the colt before he ran off. "No!" I yelled. "You are going to stay here and watch Shǔguāng and your daughter. Number will come with me, and we'll find him."

She glared at me in anger, but Shǔguāng retorted before she could.

"I don't want to stay with Lántiān," Shǔguāng growled. His sister visibly cringed at this declaration, like she had just been struck.

I glared at him. "Sometimes we don't get what we want. I expect you to stay here with her and not give her any trouble. Do you understand me? Look at me when you answer."

Shǔguāng finally looked at me, and I could see his eyes were red from crying. "Yes, Auntie Sunset. I will stay here."

He didn't promise not to give his sister trouble. Shǔguāng was much like me. He had rage in him. The difference was he was better at bottling it up and hiding it. Right now, that rage was directed at Lántiān. I'd need to do something about that, but I had another foal who was a more immediate concern.

I hurried up the stairs with Number following me. A glance to my left showed that the child gate had not been disturbed. He was in the right to wing, somewhere.

"You check this floor, and I'll go up to the next. If you find him, make sure he doesn't run off again, stay where you are and call me," I instructed as I made my way to the stairs to go to the third floor.

Number nodded and started down the hall. I went up the stairs.

When I reached the top, I looked to my left and right. I spotted Líng down the right hall, which looked very much like the one a floor below. He was about halfway down, facing away from me, curled up on the floor next to the wall, and whimpering. All the doors were doing their infernal thumping.

"Líng?" I gently called out as I quietly walked over to him. "You aren't hurt, are you?"

He just stayed curled up and crying as I reached him. I gave him a look over, but didn't see any injuries. He just chose this spot as where he would sit and have his tantrum.

I sat down next to him and sighed. "Your mother isn't completely dead," I explained. "You did see her last night, and she'll be there again tonight and every other night. I know it is hard to understand. I don't fully understand it myself, but just because we don't understand some things doesn't make them any less true. Know that she loves you and will never stop loving you, even if she no longer exists while we are awake. She lives in dreams, forever."

He looked at me with tear-filled eyes. "I don't understand."

How was I going to explain the concept of a Dreamwarden to a foal? I had heard explanations from both my daughter and daughter-in-law about what it meant to be a Dreamwarden. I knew the official line of what it meant. Tonya had even given me an easier to understand explanation shortly after she passed, but how was I supposed to boil that down to an explanation a small colt could grasp?

"Look at your fur," I instructed, hoping this would work. "Can you see that it is made of countless little hairs?"

He didn't look, but nodded that he knew this.

"Imagine that each of those hairs is a different dreamer, that each of the hairs on your body is a little person with a mind that has a soul. They are all alive, but they are all part of you. You are a life made up of millions of little lives, with your own mind, separate from all those lives." This explanation felt very wonky, but I was doing my best.

"Am I made up of lots of little people?" he asked in confusion. "What's this gotta do with Mama?"

I wasn't sure I could explain cells and microbes and such to a colt his age, but technically each person was made up of many other living things, so my explanation wasn't completely invalid. "You are made up of lots of little lives. Some might not even realize they are part of you. Your Mama is the same, except with her those little lives are the dreams of everyone. She used to have two bodies. She has one that was like ours, and another made of dreams. The one that was like ours died, and we can't bring it back, but the one made of dreams still lives. You, me, and every pony you ever meet is a part of her, but she is made of dreams and has to stay where dreams are."

His ears perked up. "So, Mama's alive?"

I bit my lip then took a deep breath. "A part of her is still alive, just not the part of her that can touch you. My wife is the same. They'll always be there when we sleep, but they can't be here when we are awake."

"So, if I stay asleep, I can stay with Mama?"

"NO!" I shouted and immediately regretted it when I saw him cringe again. "Your life is here, awake, and it would make your mother, your siblings, and me all very sad if you stay asleep forever. You don't want to make everyone sad, do you?"

"No, but I want Mama," he whimpered.

I used a leg to pull him close to me. "I know you do, but you have to accept you only get so much time with her a day, during your normal sleep. You only spent part of the day with her before, right? This is kinda the same thing, only now it is the hours you sleep. You have time with her, but you also have time with everyone else, away from her."

"I guess that's alright," he said as he cuddled closer to me.

I gently rubbed his fur. "Good. Now, we'll sit here a few minutes, and when you're ready, we will go back downstairs."

"Okay," he agreed. "Auntie Sunset, what about the dogs?"

"Dogs?" I asked in confusion. "What dogs?"

He pointed a hoof at the tower room at the end of the hall. "In there. I heard them. There are dogs in there."

I looked down the hall at the door. It was doing the same thumping as every other door. I strained my ears, but heard nothing.

"You must be mistaken. You were upset and might have heard things that aren't there," I replied.

He shook his head. "But I did hear them! I was going to go hide in that room, but I heard the dogs growling and came back here."

I gave the door another look and frowned. "Alright. Stay here. Don't follow me. I'll go check it out."

"Okay, Auntie Sunset."

I stood up and walked down the hall, surrounded by the constant beating and breathing of the house. I kept listening. He had to be imagining things, but it didn't mean I shouldn't be careful.

When I reached the door I put my ear up to it and listened. I didn't hear anything. Erring on the side of caution, I put a shield up, and carefully opened the door.

There was nothing inside. Just an empty, circular, red-bricked room with a single window cracked open.

I walked over to the window, which was low enough that a pony could look out it without having to prop themselves up or climb on something. It gave a view of the destroyed gazebo, some trees, and I could see the fence for the property in the distance and just make out the next property's house, as well as the familiar backdrop of the Rocky Mountains far away. I saw no dogs out in the yard.

SLAM!

I cried out and put a leg to my chest to steady my breathing. Those fucking doors! I took a second to catch my breath and reopened the door and stepped back into the doorway so Líng could see me.

I smiled at him. "There's nothing here! You must have imagined it. There are no dogs."

"But I did hear them! You have to believe me!" Líng protested.

I left the room and closed the door behind me. "I'm guessing you heard something else and it must have sounded like dogs, but the room is empty."

He didn't seem convinced. "Are you sure?"

I nodded as I walked back to him. "I'm sure. Now, let's go back downstairs and let everyone know you are alright, okay?"

He let me guide him back towards the stairs, but glanced back at the room. "Okay, Auntie Sunset, but I know I heard dogs."

Comments

[KeePony]

Magic is real think the veil tween times or timelines are getting thin.

[harts fire]

something is defiantly going on with this house, and i am liking it.