Chapter One: The First Strand
When Rarity first noticed the gray hair, she hadn’t known what to think.
She had found it in the bathroom that morning, among the various instruments of grooming. It was barely distinguishable against the ceramic sink. She’d only seen it because her brushstrokes had swept up a short burst of air, enough that the strand had emerged, dancing for a moment, before falling slowly back down to the sink. Rarity had caught it in her magic and held it up in front of the mirror.
The strand was long and thin, more than just a muted gray. When she turned it in her magical grasp, she saw that it was actually several different shades of it. The bottom third, a dark slate, gradually lightened into dolphin-gray in the middle, ending in a platinum-quartz mixture at the very tip. It caught the light so well, almost like a thin smoky prism, that for a moment Rarity forgot it was a gray hair.
Then, of course, she remembered that it was, in fact, a single strand of gray hair, that it was in the place where she had to tug her mane daily, curling and brushing each length until perfectly composed. She almost screamed, but the scream died in her throat; it was, after all, just a single strand, and nothing more. Right?
She let go of her magic, allowing the strand to fall back down onto the counter. Her gaze lingered on the mirror, her sapphire eyes hard and uncompromising. She twisted her head around and brought a hoof up, gently running it through the various thick strands of her violet mane. She had to get up close to the mirror in order to inspect the strands. Once she did, she could make out the violet vibrancy already starting to fade. They had not grayed yet, but were in the process of losing their color. Lines of worry crept up from her frown onto her forehead.
Rarity leaned back. She looked at herself, then at the strand of gray hair once more. How strange, she thought. For now the strand was mute, no longer vibrant, just that single shade, as though all the life had been sucked out of it and transposed elsewhere. Where? The mirror? She looked there and did not see anything of that sort, only a mare, unfamiliar in expression, staring back at her.
She put her brush back into its box, releasing a strained breath. The strand came up. She caught it in her magic, glared at it, but it did not reply, it did not do so much as look back. She sighed, and looked at the trash bin, contemplating throwing it in and being done with the whole matter.
“No,” she said—out loud, the word resonated differently with her, sounded less defiant and poised than she would have preferred.
She brought it out of the bathroom with her and entered her bedroom. From her desk, she took out from one of the drawers a spare, wooden jewelry box which had yet to be used. She opened it, and against the foamy protection inside, placed the strand, watching it curl up almost like a worm. She frowned at it, then shut the box and put it back into the desk drawer.
Suppose, though, that she had missed a few. Suppose they hid behind her curls, but would burst at any given moment! No amount of plucking would do her any good. She looked at the clock, and saw that already it was getting late in the morning. She wouldn’t have time for a full-scale inspection, anyway.
She looked outside. The sky had started to turn blue with summer. It would be a cloudless day, she remembered Rainbow saying earlier.
Rarity nodded, grim-faced. “I’ll need a hat.”
***
Yona and Sandbar had volunteered to man the Ponyville Boutique whenever Rarity had to be someplace else. This elsewhere was usually Manehattan or another city, but it was the most useful when the time came for the yearly meeting of the Council of Friendship. By Rarity’s count, four such meetings had already passed. This fifth was sure to be equally as memorable.
Yona and Sandbar greeted her as she made her way out of the Boutique, but she caught their eyes falling on her wide-brimmed sun hat. She was thankful that she made it a well-known habit that wearing a hat would not be anything unusual, but she wondered if she had somehow failed at hiding the strand. On the bright side, she would be out all day, so they would be unable to question her until much later.
So thinking, she went to the Ponyville train station and bought herself a ticket for Canterlot. The teller in the booth looked at her hat, and appeared in want of words, but she flashed him a smile and trotted to her seat without a hitch. Still, the way his gaze had lingered there slightly worried her. Perhaps the hat was just a little too obvious; perhaps it demonstrated that she was trying to cover up something.
Now in the private carriage, she took her seat by the window. Her reflection stared back. Her hat did seem just a tad bit big, she had to admit, but she hesitated. Very slowly, though, she levitated it off and paused. She looked back at her reflection, she saw that not a strand stuck out, if there were any there. Perhaps she had taken out the only one.
“Rarity!” somepony called.
Turning her head, she smiled at who had spoken. “Fluttershy!”
Fluttershy bowed her head in greeting, her smile small. She seemed to glow in the morning sun, but Rarity knew why. As she took the seat next to her, unloading herself of her small bags, Rarity leaned in and hugged her close. Her pink mane tickled her nose; it had grown, Rarity realized, and after the hug ended, she leaned back a bit to get a better look at it. With the increased length, she had changed up her manestyle, such that now it wrapped itself behind her head in a curling loop. It did so in such a way that suggested no brush had been used alone, but rather that a pair of hands—not hooves, hands—had been employed.
Seeing this, Rarity closed an eye and asked, almost conspiratorially, “And how is my recently married friend these days!”
“Eep!” Fluttershy gasped and hid behind her mane. “Rarity, you make it sound so scandalous!”
“Well, it was a bit scandalous, dear,” Rarity replied. “It’s not every day that the Element of Kindness and the Spirit of Chaos—whom she’d reformed just a few years prior, you should remember—decide to tie the knot.” She winked. “If you don’t mind me saying it: you are glowing.”
Fluttershy’s blush was deep but true. “Is it really that obvious?”
“ ‘Course it is, Fluttershy,” another voice drawled. “You’ve been smiling nonstop ever since, I reckon.”
They both turned their heads. Applejack stood in the middle of the carriage, beaming at them with a somewhat sly look. Her hat sloped at an angle, but that didn’t stop her from giving Fluttershy a knowing wink. “Took you long enough, I might add.”
“Yeah,” another voice rasped. Rainbow Dash flew in and settled next to Applejack, flapping her wings. “I mean, I thought Tank was slow, but man, Fluttershy, you sure took your sweet time with this one!”
“Oh, girls,” Fluttershy demurred. “But, you know. I just… I wanted to make sure that this was what I wanted, you know?”
Rarity almost replied, when an excited voice popped up between them—quite literally. “Of course, Fluttershy!” Pinkie said. “I mean, it’s such a big decision, and you don’t want to rush anything, no siree! I just have one question, though.”
“Yes?”
“Why didn’t you tell me you would be the one to pop the question? I had this great banner and the party cannon all set up! It would have been great!”
Fluttershy giggled. “I’m sure it would have, Pinkie. But I wanted it to be a quiet thing, you know? Plus, it was…”
“A highly romantic endeavor, to be sure,” Rarity finished for her. The pegasus’s face burned crimson once more as everypony else laughed good-naturedly. Rarity could easily recall the moment as Fluttershy had described it to her afterwards: it was early spring, and all the world was quiet, and Fluttershy had taken Discord out onto the forest trail, where a gathering of her small animal friends had come and made the proposal in a series of acorns for him to read. It had been all her idea, and honestly, just thinking about it brought a warm heat to Rarity’s heart.
The other girls settled into their seats, and it was like business as usual. They spoke at length about what they’d been up to, laughed at the stories and jokes, and expressed their excitement at meeting up with Twilight once again. Rarity joined in for a bit, but as the train started to roll and her friends continued their conversation, she found more comfort in simply sitting back and watching. It had begun as a habit ever since the first train ride to Canterlot for the first meeting of the Council of Friendship, and she found that it told her all the juicy stories and changes to their lives that her friends never could, or at least, were never aware of.
For example, when she looked at Applejack as she talked about visiting Big Mac and Sugar Belle recently, she noted the way that she had curled up next to Rainbow, and how Rainbow had not cajoled her or tried to push her away. This was hardly a surprise to Rarity; at least, it was not as much of a surprise as the time she’d seen Applejack’s hat sitting atop Rainbow’s tail, and how Applejack hadn’t fought her to give it back. She wondered if either was aware of what these meant. She doubted it. Still, that didn’t stop her from guessing how long it would take for one of them to notice and make a move, if one hadn’t tried so already. Rainbow had said Fluttershy was slow; but imagine two headstrong ponies taking their time!
Then she looked over at Pinkie Pie. Perhaps to some extent, she had been the one to change the least over the past several years. But this owed to the fact that she was good at what she did, which was keeping Ponyville’s heart alive and beating. The only change that she’d spoken about recently was that she’d gone and visited Cheese Sandwich; but she’d never elaborated if anything else had happened, so the girls were left guessing as to the significance. The last time she’d spoken of him, though, Rarity was sure there had been a gleam in her eyes. She had played it off with laughter, of course, but the memory remained.
Finally, Rarity’s eyes returned to Fluttershy. Perhaps she had changed the most, in the most drastic and overt ways. Still a bit on the shy side, there was no doubt that she’d matured into a more assertive and receptive personality, and her proposal to Discord proved that. Their wedding had only been about a month ago, but the effects, if the glow was to be believed, could still be seen.
Yes, they’d all changed, but, she thought, some things were still the same. Those old fears, those old and terrible fears, which they’d all confessed to having the day that Twilight was to be crowned; they were seemingly now unfounded, illusions best swept under the rug of reality. They were all friends, and that would never change.
Unless…
Inexplicably, Rarity brushed her hoof against her head, right in the area where she’d found the gray hair. Then she pushed her hoof down. No. It was gone. And moreover, it was just one of those strange occurrences that happened to anypony. It didn’t mean anything.
Next to her, Fluttershy said something about the new animal sanctuary, when, all of a sudden, she let out a huge yawn. Her face turned bright red, while Rainbow and Pinke cackled. “Oh, dear,” Rarity said. “Fluttershy, darling, did you get enough sleep?”
“I think I did,” she said, turning to look at Rarity. “But, you know, I’ve just been feeling more tired as of late. Discord thinks it’s because I’m working myself too hard, but I’m only doing what I’ve been doing for the past several years…”
She said more, but Rarity didn’t hear her. She didn’t hear, because she saw something else.
The bags under Fluttershy’s eyes might have suggested a lack of sleep, but Rarity knew sleep lines. Twilight would get them, Rarity would get them, Applejack would get them—they had a certain quality to them which distinguished them from most other facial features. But the ones that hung under Fluttershy’s eyes did not appear like sleep lines. They looked somehow deeper, as though carved under her coat and sewn in the fabric of her skin. They were dark and heavy with something other than tiredness, tiredness which Rarity could not see in Fluttershy’s eyes at all.
They passed into a tunnel. Rarity had yet to respond, but that was okay because Applejack commented something, causing Fluttershy to turn and address her. This allowed Rarity to see her mane much more closely, and for a half second she almost gasped out loud. There, situated just behind a tuft of pink curls, was seemingly a strand of gray hair.
When they came out of the tunnel, though, the resulting sun blinded Rarity, and just as she recovered, she saw that no such strand was there. Nothing but the long, pink hair and Fluttershy’s natural grace. But was it her imagination, or did Fluttershy’s hair seem just a tad bit paler?
“Rarity?”
“Oh!” She shook her head. “Heavens, I’m sorry, Fluttershy. I zoned out there for a second.”
“It’s all right, Rarity. I was just about to ask you how business back at the Boutique has been.”
Finally. A topic she could address without her mind straying. “It has been a busy season, for sure,” Rarity said; and as she went on and on about the increased sales, new designs, and as her friends responded happily or with mild interest, she almost forgot about what she had seen, or thought she had seen. Almost.
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Hmm...Intriguing. I shall try to read when I am able, but this is interesting.
... In a world of potions, alicorn magic, and whatever effect magic itself has, is this even an issue. Age is quite literally a number
This is gonna be a good one.
10275345
Thank you!
10275393
I'm glad it's piqued your interest; I can only hope that the rest of the story delivers on that hope.
Found a spelling error in the short description, stand instead of strand.
Looking forward to reading this story later.
I am really glad I got the chance to read this! It’s a very original concept and I’ll definitely track it!
Congratulations on making ‘Featured’ by the way!
10275522
How do you know Rarity hasn't been jabbed with a Stand arrow?
10275522
Thank you for catching that!
10275590
Thank you! Once again I appreciate your time and effort with helping me with this!
Very interesting story so far.
I can't wait to read the rest. I'm a fan if story with good ending so I'm pretty sure that I will enjoy this one.
Congrats on being featured.
10276075
Thank you!
I plucked those irritating gray hairs for a decade. Rage, rage against the dying of the light!
This is a great story and of course we all wonder what the girls have been up to since the end of the series. There's just one tiny mistake (and please don't take this as a criticism of the story itself because it's not). The Council of Friendship meets once every moon (which I assume is a month), not annually.
Of course you may have altered this point so the changes the girls are going through will appear more dramatic, which is fine.
Overall pretty good opening, although I would like more elaborations at some certain parts.
The first part was very well written, and I really like the way it ends. However, some deeper dive into Rarity's thought when she put the gray hair away would do very well to define Rarity's emotional state at this event. As of right now, her feelings are just too vague. The readers can't really tell how she took it.
The second part though I think is where opportunities were missed a lot. In the type of nostalgia inducing story like this, you should take the time when you introduce the characters. Describe their appearances, their demeanors, make it stand out to the readers when they entered. Imprint their images on the readers. That's what the readers are waiting for with the nostalgic feeling you set up. Rarity found a gray hair. What about the others, how much had they changed? How did they look now? It would also play very nicely with Rarity's train of thought, as she was being bothered by her discovery and her focus would naturally be drawn toward her friends's appearances. You did pretty ok with Fluttershy, though it could still use a little more descriptions besides her mane. But with AJ, Rainbow and Pinkie, you rushed too much. It's really a missed opportunity to paint out Rarity's thoughts better, and tug at the readers' feelings to dig that nostalgia in even deeper.
Similarly, you focused a lot on what had happened with Fluttershy, but kind of glossed over AJ, Rainbow and Pinkie's stories. These don't need to be elaborated a lot, but a few snap shots of their life, their careers can do a whole lot to that nostalgic feeling. As it stands, the story leaves the readers quite underwhelmed.
So it seems like it's not just Rarity growing grey hair.
This could be interesting!
10278416
I should hope so!
I appreciate how you introduce the story with Rarity looking at herself in a mirror, mostly not speaking. It's difficult to write "small moments". The fact that she notices gradations in the color of the offending hair shows she is almost in denial of her own interest in it, not being able to turn away. She saves it too, which I like, because it shows that she is prepared to take ownership of what is happening to her (even if she isn't ready, yet). That makes the appearance of the gray all the more bittersweet.