"You are not alone!" is the greatest lie you can hear.
The adolescent princess Flurry Heart is looking for a job. The good news is that the School of Friendship is looking for an assistant to help Trixie. The bad news is, all candidates need to take a lie detector test, with Trixie as the recruiter...
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Okay, I'm just gonna go bang my head against the wall for a while.
Imma be real honest with you chief. I have no fucking clue what I just read. But I like it? It's funny, in a crass and kinda nasty way, but it got a few chuckles out of me.
I’m reminded of the time Moe was hooked up to one in the Simpsons.
10207982
Don't do that! Think of the poor wall!
Jokes aside, trust me, other ideas I had for Flurry's 'special abilities' were even... nastier
10208002
I advise you to go watch the short video that I linked in the author's notes. It was the inspiration for the story, and it's 1000 times funnier
10208373
... I'm afraid I don't get the reference
?
10208495
In the “Who shot Mr. Burns?” two parter they had a scene where Moe was hooked up to a polygraph machine. It was one of the funnier scenes as after Moe is cleared for not shooting him it keeps calling him out for around 20 seconds.
“I have a hot date tonight”
ERRRR
“A date”
ERRRR
“Dinner with a friend”
ERRRR
“Dinner alone”
ERRRR
“I’m going to watch TV”
ERRRR
“Alright! I’m going to ogle the girls in a Victoria’s Secret catalog”
ERRRR
“....Sears catalog”
DING
“Now can you unhook me? I don’t deserve this kind of treatment!”
ERRRR
Why didn't it buzz when Trixie said the interview was going well?
This made my morning.
10208720
Just looked it up, and now I know what you meant! That scene was golden
(I wouldn't be surprised if it were the inspiration for that YT lie detector movie).
Thanks for the reference
10208739
She switched it off for a moment, just to make that statement:
10208777
I'm glad to hear it, we need more comedy (even low-brow comedy
) during these depressing times 
Who took Flurry's cherry?
10209663
Unknown. But she's around 18 so... My suspicion would be on someone close her age, who rhymes with 'pike'
10213035
Spike?
This fanfic story I've have to hear!
10217303
Oh, that's nothing! If you would know what Cadance can do with her magic... But some things are better left untold
You know, I still haven't found a story on this site about horn sex. I imagine that's something Trixie and Starlight would enjoy very much.
*Reads story. Stares at the wall really hard for about ten seconds and then shakes his head*
Nope, can't unsee it.
I was put in mind of this sketch.
10208720
Or you can just watch the sketch ...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQGwrK_yDEg
10434882
I don’t like linking copyrighted material because at some point it is most likely going to be taken down by one bot or another.
I got some good chuckles out of this. Good work!
weakness sarcasm
WHQSYT THER FIK ?
and then cadence walks in a few weeks later and goes flurry did you sleep with your boss for the job
nope
BEEP
your grounded
10434902
I edited to just have the link ... if that's not good enough, I'll just delete the post.
10436673
Actually I meant I tend to assume that YouTube videos with copyright material are likely to be taken down at some point. It’s not a criticism of people who do it, I just don’t want to have to worry about a post I put up having a dead link.
Oh Flurry. Your mother would be so proudissapointed in you.
Your aunt would be plain disappointed.
10437346
I think you mean disapprouded. And I concur.
Whoa, what the heck? I see one story pushed the other almost to the feature box
That never happened before - interesting...
10433780
Forever tainted by the visions, huh? Good
10434676
That was golden! Thank you, I've never seen it before
10434882
Yeah, that one is great too
.
10434942
Glad you enjoyed it
10436021
Ah, another tainted mind, I presume
10436048
10437346
Unless it's Flurry from Wuten's universe:
In her case, that would be pretty normal
10437753
see that would be hilarious)
Wait mom how did you know to ask that question did trixie tell you
no
beep
did she try to seduce you and dad and say it
no
beep
10437753
22- 21- -- 37 --36 -- 26 * 36-- 26 - 37 --34 * 35 - 28-- 45 --49 --39
10437678
*takes notes*
This is the funniest I have read in a long time. Well done
Not bad.
Ver horny tho.
10438378
Glad to hear it
10439968
... I see what you did there
This story was awful. I don’t want you to write ever again!
*BEEP!*
This is a work of art
10528054
We definitely weren't thinking of Flurry Heart's Vibrator Spell throughout most of this story.
*Beep*
Experience is Experience even if it’s lewd
God I hate this.
*BEEP*
FUCK OFF!