Aspiring hypno-smut author. Any sort of advice, ideas, suggestions, etc. are welcome. https://twitter.com/acid_panic
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Uh... Is the title (and the whole fic's setup as far as I can judge before reading it) meant as a riff on Obedience is Magic?
This seems good. I like it. I hope we can see some other stuff soon. Maybe Rarity entertaining a client. Applejack having quality with her family. Rainbow dash helping with the weather team and weather, and other things. I can't wait to read what you do here. Best of luck.
10188527
I think it's actually a riff on Friendship Is Magic. Friendship -> Compliance.
10188527
They're on to us!!!
*Tires squealing off into the distance*
This should be fun. Looking forward to seeing just what Starlight's working towards.
This is good so far, but since this is humanized, you should change some things to obviously age up Spike. Wouldn’t want this to be taken down.
10188555
Nah. As the writer confirmed, it's a reference to the now abandoned Obedience is Magic, another humanised fic where Starlight hypnotises the Mane 6. That itself was obviously a play on Friendship is Magic.
O awesome, been missing me Starlight takes control of everyone since Obedience is Magic stopped updating
Ah, I've been missing some good Starlight hypnosmut since Obedience is Magic stopped.
10189633
You and me both :(
What's Spike got to do with this?
I'm really torn because on the one hand I really want to see where this is all going and what Starlight is cooking up, but on the other hand the fact that this is half way through already is just crushing. I could read 100 chapters of Starlight enslaving her friends, and it would never get old.
Anyway, this story is great so far, keep it up.
Absolutely love this, sad to hear that it's the halfway point already but at the same time a nice neat closed story is a good thing, too.
Either way, calling it now, ten Bits on Twilight being the secret mastermind living out all her fantasies with her friends through Starlight.
(It's not obvious and I'll love the story either way but it's a theory)
That's fair.
Hollow Knight is really good! So are your unaware hypnosis trigger scenes. And now some surprise drama, with Starlight clearly starstruck by Twilight, which raises questions about why she's done this and if Twilight is involved at all.
Yes, clearly not remotely resembling what Starlight intends.
An intriguing hint...
I can only imagine what the local gossips have to say about Rarity given all that she's done.
Oh. I hadn't expected that reaction to Twilight. This should be very interesting indeed.
10201677
Oh geez, if only I had 100 chapters to give. I'm glad you're liking it though <3
everything okay?
10216443
YES! Sorry, bin a bit moody this week, things are still progressing I promise, sorry to keep you waiting.
any updates on the new chapter
10296773
SOON! very soon, technical difficulties have been resolved and I'm just patching over some stuff now, sorry for the delay
Not personally big on the pain play, but still pretty good overall. Seemed like a decent job of showing the work it took to keep things from getting out of hand even with mind control to spice that all up. For me the hottest part was what she did to Applejack, ironically.
10314174
It's pretty understandable why its not for everyone,but I'm glad to hear you still found something to like!
I’m loving this, can’t wait for the next chapter
Happy to see this back, and with another great chapter.
10314353
I'll *probably* regret saying this but you shouldn't have to wait long <3
10314372
Happy to be back, and glad you liked it!
Easily the best chapter so far
Not completely my cup of tea, but keeping it psychosomatic helps. Definitely looking forward to seeing what Star has in store for AJ.
This was a lot of fun. Best chapter so far.
10314670
Wouldn't have happened without you, so glad to hear it <3
10315181
Stuff like this really helps, thanks so much
10315281
I like BDSM, what can I say?
Quick writing tip: When characters address one another in dialogue, indent the name or address with commas. That helps the reader immensely. For example:
vs
As you see, that can make quite a difference!
10317763
So first of all:
You could not possibly have come up with a better example to prove your point :D
Secondly, I love advice like this because its something i'm generally pretty bad with, so thanks a lot! I'll be keeping it in mind going forward but I hope you're not too disappointed if I keep missing the mark every now and then <3
I stumbled upon this at random, and am sure glad I did. You perfectly balance the character's natural personality / dialogue with the unusual situation. It feels evil, but not sadistic to the point of being cliche. Looking forward to more :)
10330492
I'm glad you found your way back to my degenerate little corner of this website!
I'm even glad...er(?) that you like this story, that sorta balance was exactly what I was shooting for, so i'm happy it comes across a bit.
10330853
I mean, a touch of light-hearted sadism is fine too 😛 Hands down the best part is Rarity's casual conversation about her daily routine.
How's the next chapter coming along?
10491179
Poorly!
I've been stuck at 85% done for a while now, I just can't seem to flesh out what's left to my satisfaction...
Sorry to keep you waiting
10491518
Yeah, I get that.
Maybe if you could show me what you have, I could offer something to help?
Where did you get the story picture?
10581449
https://www.deviantart.com/racoonkun/art/Starlight-Glimmer-EG-666724052
It's in the images source, I'm not sure why it wouldn't be visible
There's going to be m/f sex in this story, right?
10743443
ehhhhhum...
not *a lot* I don't think :/ theres some in the first chapter, but the demographics in this one mean there won't be much more except maybe towards the end. Theres a decent bit of it in Business as Usual (my other story) which might be worth giving a look, though its pretty different tonally. Sorry to disappoint, I'll try to keep eyes open for places to work some more in.
I like this a lot
And while I'm a SoarinDash shipper at heart, the Appledash foreshadowing works for the story
10743492
Hey thanks! I'm glad to hear it.
I'm pretty ship agnostic personally, but you're right, I think its just what works best for current circumstances
10743552
By the way, I do have a possible sequel in mind for when this is done.
I can wait to send it whenever you want me to (or not at all. I'd understand, though definitely be a bit disappointed).
Love to see more of this. Kind of surprised by the direction it took; sometimes hard to tell what's really real with everyone's mind so scrambled.
10743699
Good to be back! Hopefully not *too* confusing lol, thanks for waiting around