• Member Since 11th Feb, 2019
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Lady Umbra

I love writing both Original Fanfictions and Movie Xovers[Meaning I write the movie plot with MLP characters] I also love all forms of feedback

Comments ( 212 )

You were my brother Sombra you're supposed to help the Empire not destroy it.

Star Wars Reference...Nice

If you like to use it you can

Did you just call me blob

Technically no. I say it cause it rhymes
Speak in rhyme all the time

I know I was doing the X-Men Wolverine Origin Reference

This is pretty cool!:pinkiehappy:
Hope the next chapter is soon!:heart:

An amazing, no spectacular start author. Can't wait for the next chapter.

There are some grammatical and sentence structure errors, but it's heck of a lot better than what I have found before.

Anyway, you have my interest!

Veamos hacía dónde va ésto?

You were my brother once, Sombra, I said, my knuckles turning white as I gripped my weapon. "You were supposed to help the Empire. Not destroy it."

Nice reference

Hey keep up the great work ok can't wait to see more

"You must hate me now Amber," I whispered under my breath. "Turns out I'm not as faithful as I thought."

It doesn't matter,she is dead
She is not presumed dead, lost somewhere and alive, no she is dead

Even if she was a ghost she wouldn't care
If he was mortal, with normal lifespan she would wait for him to join her
But he isn't, so she won't wait and expect his premature death

Also,Celestia tried to destroy something so close to him that I think he shouldn't just take the hit for the plant but also hit back

I can see were your coming from but still, that's kind of cold man. :fluttershysad:

Oh, if Celestia had destroyed that plant. Every nature spirit and being would come busting into that castle like the FBI. And then pile onto Celestia.

Can’t wait for next chapter

"First and foremost,” Celestia continued. “King Sombrahesta; for giving into the power of Umbra the Dark , me and my sister have decreed that you shall be stripped of both your title and your kingdom and the Crystal Empire shall be in the care of Princess Mí Amore Cadenza and Prince Shining Armor. Henceforth, they are dubbed King and Queen of the Crystal Empire."

Oh now she decides that and everyone is okay with that
Crystal Empire is not hers and they should be fighting for its independence
But of course, be another boring doormat that just follows orders, even orders from those you shouldn't take from

Are you just going to rag on everything that I write in this fanfiction

I'm not ragging but pointing out he shouldn't even follow their orders. His loyalty should be to Crystal Empire not Equestria

“We don’t kill,” Celestia said firmly. “Even one such as yourself.”

Just like the Jedi, it's not an act of kindness but one of subtle sadism but a bit less subtle in this case.

Comment posted by The Valeyard deleted Aug 25th, 2020

Ye, death would be a mercy for one who has went through so much pain.

Could you fit Night Sketch in, he's half changling/pegasus, his base form is that of a black Pegasus, with flame like mane/tail, purple eyes, a set of fangs, and a cutie mark depicting a pencil drawing the moon and 3 stars (profile pic for ref.) . The fruit he'd have would be Kanjuro's drawing fruit but actually has a talent for drawing
He just recently found out he was part changling (he was a tad close to Canterlot during the event of the wedding) but has had the fruit for a few years

Could you add in my character Rayla? She is a royal changeling (fine with her being a normal changeling if that doesn't fit your lore.) with long cerulean hair and tail with purple eyes. She wears silver and blue half plate armor with a blue single shoulder cloak over her left shoulder, and she uses a black falchion. The fruit i'd like her to have is the ice-ice fruit. She sees herself as a guardian and helps anyone she can with fighting off pirates.

P.S i have drawn her if you want a picture to go off of.

"First and foremost,” Celestia continued. “King Sombrahesta; for giving into the power of Umbra the Dark , me and my sister have decreed that you shall be stripped of both your title and your kingdom and the Crystal Empire shall be in the care of Princess Mí Amore Cadenza and Prince Shining Armor. Henceforth, they are dubbed King and Queen of the Crystal Empire."

Um, Celestia? I have a teensy tiny question. WHAT gives YOU the authority to take away the title of King from the ruler of a sovereign nation? And if we’re gonna talking legal and being tried for crimes, then prepare yourself. First of all, even IF you somehow had legal authority here, that would be suspended or even taken away completely by you and your sisters trials before the court of law. “On what charges?” You might ask. Let’s start with Luna. Two words, NIGHTMARE MOON. When she became Nightmare Moon, she tried to MURDER you, so that assault and attempted murder, not to mention heavily damaging government property during the battle. Then there’s the fact that she tried to kill the ruler of a nation, another serious charge. Plotting against the throne is another one as well. And this isn’t even considering charging her for what she would have done. Plunging the planet into eternal night wouldn’t technically be against the law, but she’s still upsetting the natural order of things. She also would have almost certainly killed any who would try to fight back against her in hopes of bringing back the day. And eternal would have destroyed the ecosystem, and as a result caused the economy of every single nation to completely collapse, which could be considered terrorism on a massive scale. And, oh yes, eternal night would have eventually led to the extinction of every single species on the planet, meaning she also has several pending charges of genocide, as well as more regicide charges since every ruler would have died too. And what is her punishment? Besides from her 1,000 years banishment, she came back, tried A SECOND time to do the above listed things, then is still able to retain her title, authority, and is allowed complete freedom. And as for you Celestia, for allowing such a potentially dangerous criminal to roam free you could be charged with negligence of duty, corruption, even conspiracy against the entire world! And what has Sombra done? He succumbed to dark Magic and enslaved the people of one empire, as well as probably several charges that of murder. That it, just the charges of slavery and several murders. And yet Luna got away with so much more TWICE. “But she wasn’t in control of her actions.” You say, but neither was Sombra, and they both succumbed to dark magic, except that the difference is that Luna willingly allowed such things to happen while Sombra had been a much more unwilling participant. Sure his actions were the catalyst for it to happen, but so we’re Lunas. In short, you have absolutely no authority to do this, and if Sombra is on trial, then so should you and your sister for your own crimes. And before I forget, these crimes now include installing a puppet government in an illegal and illegitimate takeover of a sovereign nation to assimilate into Equestria.

He has a point though, you should read my other comment to see what I mean.

can I make an OC for this story?

Of course just send me the details via a PM
Devil Fruit:
[Their backstory can help me figure out how i'm going to use them]

Don't forget about Discord.

True, but the reason I bring this up is because they have no right to try ANYONE, Pony, Shade, Draconequess, or otherwise, because they should be on trial themselves, and due to much worse crimes than literally any other ever committed in their history. Discord would have f-ed up everything, but at least he wouldn't have killed every living thing on the planet, because there's no fun in that. Nightmare Moon would have.

The music lasted all the way to the end of the chapter dead but never forgotten.

I wanna see someone have the Ice ice fruit or icy fruit

How many fruits are in this story

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