Marshmallow Dreams

by Halira

Chapter 25: Maybe This Job Isn't the Right Fit

I stared dumbfounded at Phobia Remedy, unsure if I had heard her right. Maybe I didn't understand the question. I wasn't stupid, but that didn't mean I couldn't misinterpret things. There were lots of things I didn't understand.

"Um, I'm sorry, could you clarify that question for me?" I asked in a tiny voice. "I think I got the wrong impression."

The night pony stood up on the couch and then did a few quick flaps of her wings to fly to the other side of the room. She landed next to the case with the ugly old doll and put a wing against it as she gazed upon it.

"This doll belonged to Sha'am Maut," she began. "She left it to me in her will. It belonged to her long dead daughter, and she kept it as a keepsake after her daughter died. She wanted to remind me of how the world is cruel, and can swallow us up if we are not strong enough, as was consistent with her outlook on life. I instead look at it and see the reminder of how even a good soul can be twisted and perverted into something sinister. Sha'am was a good woman, once upon a time, a kindly mother who did all she could to care for her children. Time and injustice after injustice warped her into something darker, something terrible."

I was confused. I felt like I got confused way too often. "Okay… but what does that have to do with the question you asked me?"

She looked back at me. "Sha'am becoming a Dreamwarden was a mistake, but we cannot ignore to others' detriment that any one of us have the potential to turn into something vile and dangerous, no matter how good a person we may be now. I have been asked, and have also questioned myself, about what would have happened if Sha'am had not stood down? What if she had defied the rest of us and kept doing what she was doing? What if I had not been able to intimidate her into good behavior? What were we supposed to do then?"

I couldn't believe what I was saying. "So your solution is to kill all the Dreamwardens?!"

"I have considered many methods on how to deal with a rogue Dreamwarden," Phobia replied. "We have many advantages in what we can do in our day and age that weren't available billions of years ago. Unfortunately those advantages won't last forever, and I continue to consider more permanent solutions and more methods. One of the methods I have devised involves completely rebooting the dream realm, which would erase any Dreamwarden trapped within. It is not the only possible method I have devised, but the most effective we currently have."

I still couldn't believe it. "But- Miss Seapony, Mister Potty-Mouth, the Angel Lady, that would kill all of them for good. What if they didn't do anything wrong? Why should we erase them?"

Her eyes were hard as they locked on me. "Because it is our duty to protect the minds that enter the dream realm. If a threat arises from our own ranks we must not hesitate to do what is necessary to fulfill our duties. Yinyu, Ghadab, and Arbiter are all in grim agreement with me, and they are prepared to do what they must if the need ever arises."

I didn't want to hurt anyone, much less kill anyone. I started to cry and her expression softened before she continued- not by much, but there was a slight relaxing of her gaze. "I hope that none of us will ever have to make that kind of choice. We do everything we can to choose good candidates and support one another in our hours of need. I don't see any of us being so corrupted, but we would be foolish to not be prepared for the worst. Even with all our efforts it can still happen, and given enough time and enough generations of Dreamwardens we will inevitably come to one who will force us to make that choice- if not us then future generations. We must be resolute and do what must be done when that happens, even if it costs some of us our very existence."

I knew the answer she wanted to hear, but I couldn't bring myself to say I would do it. It was just too horrible a thing to agree to. At the same time, I understood why she felt that was needed, and I knew that she was right.

"I-I'm sorry," I finally replied in a choked voice. "I understand what you're saying, and I agree with you, but I just can't do something like that. I want to be able to help people and make their lives happier, and I understand how a corrupt Dreamwarden can ruin lives, but to ask me to kill them… I-I just can't. Maybe that means that I'm not cut out to be a Dreamwarden, but I won't ever do something to hurt or kill, even if it might be better if I did."

"I see," she said in a flat tone. I imagined it was hiding disappointment. "It is good and brave of you to be honest with me. Many would have simply told me what they thought I wanted to hear. If you had told me you would do whatever was necessary I would have known it for a lie. The truth is written too loudly in your body language for you to lie to me, even if I had never seen into your mind."

I nodded dejectedly. "I guess you will be voting against me."

She surprised me by shrugging. "I shall continue to consider your candidacy, just as I have since you were first proposed. I simply have more information to weigh into that decision than I did before. I think our time is up for today though. I will pack up the remainder of your cake so you may take it home with you." She lifted her head up high and flicked an ear. "I might not have your powers, Jess, but still can I hear you lurking by the stairs. Come on out."

Jess came slowly around the corner with a sad expression. She glanced at me then turned to Phobia. "Are you serious about that? That my aunt agrees to let herself be killed off for good if it came to it?"

That sparked my instant curiosity. I was meeting lots of relatives of Dreamwardens. "Who's your aunt?"

"Arbiter," Jess said shortly. "My older brother and I talk to her all the time, even if my parents can't. We tend to pass messages back and forth between her and my dad."

"I'm serious and so is Arbiter," Phobia replied. "Do you really think she wouldn't lay down her undead life as quickly as she laid down her life in the waking world if that was what it took to protect others?"

Jess shook her head. "I believe you. Does Auntie Sunset know about that?"

Phobia shook her head. "We didn't feel there was a need to tell her. You knowing we have such plans if need be is privileged information. We don't exactly want to broadcast that there are methods to destroy us. The people that need to know it have been informed."

"Who needs to know?" I asked.

"Princess Celestia, Princess Twilight Sparkle, Princess Cadance, a few key world leaders- although I won't go into specifics about which ones," Phobia answered. "My own family doesn't know. As I said, I hope never to be forced to make that choice, and will do everything I can to make sure I don't have to, but it doesn't mean I don't prepare all the same."

Jess's brow creased. "You conspicuously left Princess Luna off your list of princesses."

Phobia nodded. "So I did." She didn't elaborate on that. I didn't have to be as smart as Jess to figure out why. These plans were just as much meant to take out Luna if need be, and they didn't feel the need to give her a heads up that they had plans in place to destroy her if it came down to it. Princess Luna was the one responsible for creating our Dreamwardens, and it seemed cold that they would make plans to destroy her if they needed to do so.

Jess didn't reply further. I knew she had to have figured it out if I did. She just looked tiredly around the room as if this was just one more weight on top of many for her. I wondered what things she did for Phobia and what was so stressful about them.

"You may want to make yourself scarce," Phobia continued. "I have other guests arriving in about an hour, some leaders of Humanity First."

Both my head and Jess's head shot up. "What?" I blurted out. "Why would you invite them over? They hate ponies!"

Phobia didn't bat an eye at our shock. "Just to talk, have some tea, and enjoy the afternoon."

"Talk about what?" I asked in disbelief. "Are you telling them hating ponies is wrong? I don't think they're going to listen to a pony about that."

"We'll discuss the weather, sports, the stresses of parenting, maybe some good books or movies that we've seen or read," she replied in that same calm tone. "It's just a friendly visit."

"A friendly visit with a bunch of speciest humans that hate your guts," Jess replied in a half growl, balling her hands into fists.

Phobia nodded. "I'm glad I was clear."

Jess huffed and stomped a foot. "I've known you my whole life, and I still don't have a clue what goes on in your head sometimes!"

"That is likely a good thing," the Dreamwarden replied. "Would you be a dear and go put the cake lid on her cake and bring it out here? You may lower your sound barrier now as well. Our conversation is at an end."

Jess didn't verbally answer, she just threw her hands up in the air and stormed out of the room. An uneasy quiet settled over the room between me and the Dreamwarden after she left, and I wondered if I was supposed to be saying or doing something.

"Jess is a good girl," Phobia said, breaking the silence. "But she's still a fourteen-year-old with all the issues that come with that."

"She's just fourteen?" I asked in surprise. Jess definitely didn't look fourteen, she looked as old as me, or older.

Phobia chuckled. "A very mature fourteen, but still just fourteen, and don't let her try to fool you into thinking she's older, because she will try."

"I hear you, Phobia!" Jess shouted from the kitchen.

"I know," Phobia replied without raising her voice even a single decibel. "Perhaps you should spend some time with Rebecca for a few hours, since I need you away from the house anyway. Crystal can take you both to her house and can bring you back when the coast is clear."

Jess walked back into the room holding the cake in a container. "I was wanting to spend more time catching up with Jordan before I needed to get on a plane back home."

"She can join you as well. I will let my father and Amanda know. I prefer she not be around either for these guests. You'll have Crystal with you to defend you both."

Jess looked towards a window. "And your foals?"

"They'll be going to bed," Phobia answered.

"I guess my parents won't mind some unexpected guests," I added in. I wouldn't mind getting to spend a little more time with Jess as well, and I supposed meeting Phobia's little sister would be interesting too. It occurred to me just then that I hadn't thought of her as Miss Nightmares since she ordered me not to, and wondered if there was some subtle mind magic at work.

"I suppose it is okay then," Jess relented. "I'm still going to need a few minutes to cheer Jordan up after Moon kicked her flank."

I gave the partial human a confused look. "But you didn't get to see the fight, and you were rooting for her."

Jess just flicked both of her ears. Oh yeah, she heard everything in a certain range. She just had to choose to listen in. How did she sort through all those different sounds without it driving her crazy? Her manipulation of sound was such a cool bit of magic unlike anything I'd ever heard of, and I wanted to know all the stuff she could do with it. Melissa had a weird magic radar sense too, although it seemed to work differently than Jess's. Why did humans all get such cool magic and ponies just got basic stuff?

Well, I supposed mine wasn't basic, but there were other ponies, even if they were very few, that could do the same thing.

"Am I allowed to talk to Jess and Jordan about my powers?" I asked.

Phobia gave a lazy shrug. "Who you speak to about them is always at your discretion, at least since you ceased being a minor. We discourage you from making them public knowledge, but we can't actually ban you from talking about them with whoever you wish. I would classify Jess as generally safe when discussing such things. Jordan you might want to use a little more caution with, not that I don't trust my little sister, just that she is also a young teen and has never really been expected to keep any major secrets. If word gets out about what you can do it is ultimately your problem to deal with, not the OMMR's. That is all in the bylaws for your classification, you might want to re-read them. Don't tell about any others with the ability, that is not your secret to tell."

That made me feel a little embarrassed not to know. It seemed like one of those things I would have been extra super excited about when I turned eighteen. I just always assumed I wasn't allowed to talk about them because they always told me not to since they first manifested. That, and the fact that anyone inquiring from the OMMR about them were always denied access to knowing. I wasn't about to just go announcing it to everyone, but surely I could safely tell Maggie about them. I always felt bad keeping them a secret from her even though we were supposed to be best friends.

"You two really should be going now," Phobia reminded us. She then flapped her wings and crossed the room so she was behind Jess. "It was a pleasure meeting with you, Rebecca. I'll be in touch. Have a pleasant rest of your day." She then just walked off out of sight.

With our dismissal Jess and I just looked at one another and she shrugged at me. "At least she didn't monologue too much. She must have been distracted. Let's get going. Crystal is right outside the door and Jordan is still out in the yard. Arachne and Moon are sparring right now, so beware of falling night ponies when you go out the door."

That was such a cool ability.

Comments

[Gargon94]

so beware of falling night ponies when you go out the door."

This line make me LOL really hard.

[badninja]

An interesting answer to that question. I hope Rebecca can tell more people about herself as she goes to college.