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Chapter 3

Standing in front of the school, I faced down my mother for the first time in years. She hadn’t changed much, still wearing that purple suit jacket and disapproving look at the sight of me.

Rainbow Dash snickered at my predicament and flew away to the school.

“Well Octavia, what are you doing back in town?” my mother asked.

“I’m just back for a few days,” I said, mostly truthfully.

“You didn’t even come see me.”

“The visit isn’t over yet, mum.”

“And another thing, where did you pick up that ridiculous accent?”

The Canterlot School of Subterfuge. It was partially to make me sound sophisticated, and partially to disguise where I was born. I changed the subject, because I didn't need to see her reaction if she found out I now had the secondary ability to spell words with extraneous “u”s, such as colour.

“I’m in the middle of a job right now, but I-” I grit my teeth “-I promise that I will visit you before I leave town.”

“That won’t be good enough, I’m afraid.”

“Well, what do you want?” I snapped.

“Come have dinner with me tonight,” she said, slightly surprising me that she actually had a response to my intended-rhetorical question. Though, I probably should have expected that from her. Always prepared. Always in control. Dad couldn’t take it, not that he was any great stallion anyway. I only missed him because when he was gone, all her attention was focused on me. I also left town as soon as I could.

“I’m not sure I’m available tonight,” I said.

“Well, what else do you have going on?”

I could either tell her what I was doing, or cave. I sighed. “What time?”

She actually let me go, after talking at me for a few more minutes about arrangements for the evening. Though maybe, as Rainbow had told me, she needed to get to her job inspecting the school.

I escaped. Not my proudest moment, running from my own mother, but I had faced changeling feelings-dealers that I would rather see sooner than her. There was a reason I hadn’t returned to Ponyville all these years.

Shaking off the encounter and heading back for the center of town, I studied the file Mr. Rich had given me. On initial inspection, I agreed with his gut feeling that the Flim Flam brothers were out to scam him. Their proposal was just too...good. Not only too good to be true, but just too polished and slick in general. Someone had clearly spent a lot of time thinking about this paperwork, how it would look, and how it could be convincing.

Granted, maybe they just had really good advertising. That’s why I did my best to operate on facts, rather than opinions. I trusted my gut feeling, but only if I didn’t have better information. My job involved much more research than the average viewer of spy movies would believe. For ponies like me, information is the most valuable resource.

I was almost to the library to conduct said research when I realized that it didn’t exist anymore. How was I supposed to find a new library if I didn’t know where I could go to look up information?

However, on the front of the castle, I found a sign. Castle of Friendship. And then, in smaller letters below it, another sign. And library. Oh good.

The building was small for a castle, but Princess Twilight didn't live there anymore. It seemed a nice place, made of sparkling crystal. No matter; it could have been a pigsty as long as it had reference books.

Libraries are fantastic places. Not only are they educational, but they’re free, and one can kill as much time as she likes there. In addition, they’re quiet, and it’s generally easy to spot people who don’t belong.

Such as the Flim Flam brothers, who I noticed immediately as I entered the building. They had helpfully put a picture of themselves on the logo of their business proposal. They were a tall pair of unicorns wearing striped vests and boater hats.

Flim & Flam
The businessponies

Meeting them like this mucked with what I had intended to do, gathering information before going to see them. If I simply ignored them while I researched, only to confront them later, they might be suspicious. It was a difficult decision, but instead I pressed forward with the inklings of a plan as I walked up to them. They were huddled over a few economics textbooks as I approached.

“Good afternoon, gentlecolts.” I flashed the folder. “I would like to talk to you about your business proposal.”

In perfect coordination, the brothers, who were clearly twins, glanced at each other before turning back to me with wide smiles.

“The name’s Flam, ma’am,” said the one on the left.

“My brother’s him, my name’s Flim,” said the one on the right

“And how can we be of assistance?” they chorused, both of them shaking my forehooves simultaneously.

A greeting tells you a lot about a pony. These two had clearly rehearsed this. They’d thought long and hard about how ponies saw them and how to put a little razzle dazzle into things. Well, another could play at that game.

“My name’s C. Sharp,” I said, dusting off an old cover identity. I nodded to one of the library’s meeting rooms. “Could we talk privately, gentlecolts? I have a few questions about this proposal.”

They were happy to oblige me and the three of us sat down at the meeting room table, Flam closing the door with his magic.

I laid the folder out in front of me for easy reference. “First off, I was wondering if this was all-exclusive of the contract, or if there were any supplementaries?”

“This is everything. We wanted to make it as easy as possible,” Flim said smoothly.

I nodded. “So in your plan to open a Barnyard Bargains satellite store, were you aware how many times in the past Mr. Rich has been solicited by others to grant franchise rights?”

“Well, it’s not about those who came before, it’s about the businessponies like us who can get the job done now,” said Flam.

“We’ve got more business qualifications than anypony in the business,” said Flim.

“Guaranteed!” they chorused.

“Such as?” I asked, folding my hooves on the table and fixing the two of them with a stare.

They actually sang.

“Well little lady, we’ve got your opportunity.”

“To expand to new communities.”

“To sell goods and commodities.”

“And every single kind of oddity.”

They stood up and were really getting into the pitch.

“Two stores open in Manehattan-”

“-sale volume up in reaction.”

“Fillydelphia hosts us too-”

“-one store open, shiny and new.”

“Breaking ground in Baltimare-”

“-brand new store opening there.”

“Saddle Arabia loves us most-

“-four stores there, not to boast.”

“Flagship store’s in Trottingham-

“-it’s where we made our name, Flim and Flam.”

They struck a pose. I have to admit, I was momentarily swayed by the presentation. I can’t help it; ponies are naturally susceptible to song and dance. I’d used the tactic myself.

Getting ahold of myself, I asked, “So with a series of successful businesses under your own name, the Flim Flam Brothers Emporium, why would you like to license the Barnyard Bargains brand?”

“We were thinking how to sell more stuff,” said Flim. “And then it came to us, why not sell entire stores?”

“Filthy Rich has enough on his plate right now,” said Flam. “We’ll use our extensive network to set up a new store, and all he has to do is pay the rights to put the Barnyard Bargains name on it, and in return receives a share of the profits.”

“Tell me about your network,” I said. “If I counted correctly, you have eight stores, half of which are in Saddle Arabia.”

“That’s correct. We leverage foreign socioeconomics to ensure everypony gets the best prices,” said Flim.

“Your stores in Saddle Arabia are also branded as the Flim Flam Brothers Emporium?” I said, glancing at the paperwork.

“And they’re the finest-quality Equestrian-style emporiums in the country!” replied Flam.

I had been in Saddle Arabia only a few weeks ago, and there hadn’t been any business of the kind, much less four. But I’d already been pretty sure Flim and Flam were just out to make a quick load of bits and the franchise they were supposedly opening would be worth less than the paper on which this proposal was printed.

But I didn’t say that. Instead, I leaned forward and lowered my voice. “That’s good. That’s what I wanted to hear. I hope you gentlecolts might be open to a different type of business.”

They caught my shift in tone, but were still nodding and smiling. “Certainly, we could alter the deal if-”

“No, I’m not interested in Mr. Rich’s deal. I’m talking about for me.”

Now they paused. “Oh, you are not his representative?” said Flim.

“Then how did you come into possession of the very exclusive offer that we created for him?” asked Flam.

“Oh, I found it...lying around,” I said, deliberately. “But fortunately, you two are exactly the kind of ponies I was hoping to meet. You see, I need the use of a network.”

The two of them traded glances and then matched my posture, leaning a little closer and talking a little quieter. “What did you have in mind?”

“Well you see, I have quite a lot of product that needs to be transported, distributed, and sold. It’s the type of thing that could easily be...added to a regular shipment. Ponies all over the world would be quite interested in what I sell. And the profits are quite attractive.”

“Well, Miss C. Sharp...as we’ve shifted to the service industry, we may not have quite the business model you seek,” said Flam.

“Our business caters to more...traditional products,” added Flim. Both of them started to lean back from the table.

I leaned forward into the space they were vacating and touched both of their hooves. “You don’t understand. I’ve worked very hard to find a partner for this, and I think your extensive network of stores makes you two perfect. If you want, we can go to a more secure location and I can lay out exactly what I’m asking, just so there are no misunderstandings. Like the last partnership I attempted, who claimed to be in the logistics industry, but his company was all a shell and in actuality was one donkey with a pair of saddlebags. I very much dislike cleaning up messes like that. Like my name, you’ll find that I can be very sharp sometimes. So having said that, I hope you can appreciate my urgent interest in your network of stores.”

“Well, we wouldn’t want to have to do cleanups, would we?” said Flam. He grinned weakly. He and his brother were still edging towards the door.

“Why don’t we meet again soon?” I said. “I’d like to get a tour of one of your stores.”

“Well, we’ll see if we can pencil you in,” said Flim.

“Busy busy,” added Flam. They both got up and hurried out the door.

I sighed and leaned back in my chair. Well, that went better than expected. I hadn’t thought I would get this job knocked out in just one afternoon.

Collecting the paperwork, I walked out of the meeting room. I checked the nearby wall clock. I had enough time to get back to the Rich house, report in, and maybe even pick up the diamond brooch and return it before I had to be at my mother’s house.

I set off at a trot, heading back to the mansion. Passing through the front gates, I pulled up short before reaching the front door. It was slightly open.

Frowning, I cautiously pushed it wider, revealing that the frame was splintered as if somepony had bucked it open. There was a broken vase on the foyer floor.

Despite the damage, I heard not a sound. Where was the butler? Where was anypony?

As quietly as I could, I advanced into the house.

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