- Member Since 14th Jul, 2017
- offline last seen Jan 24th, 2021
Nazhan
Hi, I don't really know what I'm doing. Here's some stories I guess.
Nazhan
Joined 14th Jul, 2017 ·
Offline
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The fic just started and I want Collar dead, good way to start with your villain. This should be interesting, I'll definitely keep a close eye on this one.
10130697
Thank you! And I hope I can deliver a good story.
If I can be honest, you've got a good story here but I think you're hitting your readers a little too hard with dark and depressing moments. Even Project Horizons gave you breathing moments. Not saying it should all be sunshine and rainbows of course, but you've got one filly killed, another kidnapped, and rape all within 13k words. Give readers more of a breather is all I'm saying.
Great character! GREAT writing! Definitely had a A Quiet Place kind of feeling to it in chapter one. I loved it! Already can’t wait for the next chapter!
10138640
Yeah, I can see how these first couple chapters can be hard to read through; especially because they are the first chapters. I'll see what I can do to inject some levity and space out the harder to read sections for the rest of the story ( I think cutting back on the amount of time Pyrr spends thinking about the events in Chapter 1 is a good start ). So this should really be the worst of it for a good while as well. Chapter 3 is where I plan for Pyrr to (finally) begin a proper Fallout adventure.
And thank you for the feedback! This is my first large story I've actually committed myself to writing, so every opinion and little bit of advice helps with my inexperience.
I may have gone a little off the deep end with how dark the story got.
10138893
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Thank you! I'll probably start my very haphazard writing process for CH.3 in the morning