You've all heard the "I died and was Displaced to Equestria" prompt. Rather than Equestria, I wound up in a Void, waiting to be shaped into a world, and with the power to do just that. After a brief conversation with someone who may or may not exist (still not sure if I was talking to myself) I decided to create Equestria, just to see what would happen. It's not turning out quite as I'd pictured, but I'm enjoying the ride.
FAQ and answers can be found here: https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/990621/after-death-creation-faq
Chapters (6)
Hmmm. This one has a weird energy to it. A story of its sort coukd come off as cliche'd, but it avoids that quite well.
10120623
but at least it wasn't right out of the starting gate.
Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it so far. I have 2 P.H.D.s in writing cliches, so it will happen eventually
wow. I'm actually really impressed with this story. I cannot wait to read more. I will be adding this to a special list of stories that I consider the best of the best. I do hope you keep writing. I'm truly curious about what you think of next!
A solid first chapter, a very solid one.. I shall track this story with interest.
Interesting Story, Can’t wait for more.
So, basically they're not ponies, but more like fanon hippogriffs or fanon draconies?
Not that I'm against this, anthro fics and humanized fics exist, after all.
keeping an eye on this because I've had about the same idea for a while and really had no idea how to write it. Youre definitely going about it differently than I would have which is keeping me drawn in- keep up the good work.
I already love it! Moar! Iz demand moar!
Alright, consider me interested.
I do wonder where you plan to take this, so I think I'll go ahead and watch.
Looks good
Looks interesting. Let's see where it would go.
Is there a picture of these gallopfrey? What about these front 'hooves' that are like 'paws', what do they look like?
Interesting. Let's see where this goes.
10122104
My best guess is something akin to a hippogryph
Seems like a good basis. the main charector is a well rounded charector and you didn't push into the god complex to much so it's a good starting point to a good fic
10122104
Just added some art that formed the design.
10121374
Just added some art that formed the design
10122362
well. I'll say that isn't what I had in mind when you said they were hoof-like. this is one hundred percent a paw. I gotta say i had the image of an ordinary hoof but the front of it split into 3 separate toes and when they are put together they would look like a normal hoof. very interesting concept though. I am still looking forward to more!
10121937
Considering that for now, the only mlp related things are ponies with paws and the rest fits more Doctor Who fandom, fanfiction, I agree
Also, why make the main that has God-like powers, creating rules for himself that don't really matter and be boring with powers
The chapter started interesting but then became dull when he created rules for himself and the first planet and sentient species
Quite a nice start to this, would like to see more.
Similar to this story,
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/457978/godly-promotion
If anyone could point me in the direction of more of these types of stories, I would be thankful.
You piqued my interest
i.redd.it/vud79ngfasly.jpg
OH OMG YES YES YOU MUSIT KEEP AT IT!
10122362
Oooh wow. That hand design is exotic! Dont think I've ever seen anything like that before. Xd
I like it.
"To become God is the loneliest Achievement of all."
I suppose it fits here. If I had the power he, or you, I suppose, posses, I would certainly not be as kind as you are.
I'll be keeping an eye on this one.
Definitely an good rule. If there is no effort to the goal, What was the point of doing it?
10121937 10122546
Oh hush both of you, just because ye can't get a reference doesn't mean ya can't enjoy this stories uniqueness. And what smart person wouldn't put rules in place to keep their morals inline upon becoming god like? Heretics are what, an so far the character [Weyan'a, the Architect] is doing a fine job at not being an arrogant self absorbed fool.
Which, thinking on it, is what you two were expecting/hoping to read, but instead ye got the good guy who's done a good job and isn't abusing his power like Discord and/or Zeus or number of other retarded almighty beings.
So again ye wee neigh say'ers, hush it.
10123799
It wasn't so much the defense (which I really appreciate!) as much as the fact it was done with an amazing Scottish accent. Thanks so much!
Thank you, that just made my whole week!
10123833
Eh just a bit of me heritage along with an Irish tint coming thru, and yer welcome, keep up the good work laddie.
10123930
So yer saying that taking 6000 years to perfect multiple galaxies plus starting a group of beings to help watch over them is humanly inefficient, when in fact there are people here on our world who spend their whole lives making something perfect; AS is the best things come with TIME.
And then that when they encounter the very force'es they'd put into place "them selves", and have a moment of forgetfulness, that they shouldn't act like they know what's going on at all...
Ah-huuuuuh, riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
media.discordapp.net/attachments/634448954788151347/686829473890697232/th_421.jpg
p.s. DO you even preview and edit yer own comments or no? Also note if you were to grab a random book off the self at yer local Barnes an Nobel just because it grabbed yer fancy, you to wouldn't have a clue of what was going on till near the end.
I'll be honest, I was interested in this story until the description of what these new ponies would look like came up. The description put me off a little bit but the reference images at the end helped me imagine it a little better so thanks for that!
Pony description aside the story instantly caught my interest so I'll be reading with rapt attention!
This is too real and I hate this. Favourited already.
10124302
Life is but a game, a game played out thru a narrative story line, one where we each are our own players. Within this surreal reality of it all there are cheat codes, theses codes are mostly noted only by the subconscious; but every now an then some-being becomes conscious of them, and it changes their approach to the game, whether for good or bad, forever.
So the MC left a little access port to said cheat codes open so his guardian race grew up faster, and then he smacked himself for his own under sight for setting the oven at 30 minutes to cook the cookies when they only needed 20. Who are we to judge him for his mistake, when I know and maybe you'v done this to, have left the stove while the food cooked to do other random things, only to go BUCK ME!!! as the smell of smoke wefts into the next room.
So I guess the real question is, why are you judging someone who isn't perfect, for making a mistake that anybody can make? That might I say, he at least caught it before they where inedible, so I'm note complaining.
*Takes another bite out of his brown/almost burnt chocolate chip cookie, giving you another raised eyebrow as he dunks it in milk.*
i have absolutely no idea why you would say anycreature, as body, litteraly implies everyone.
Just one of my pet peeves
I looked at that picture of Derpy and The Doctor in the author's note and suddenly I feel as though I've been enlightened. How did I never consider the idea of pegasi having tail feathers?
This story’s going really fast. Like, the pacing is through the roof. There’s no time to really process anything as a result, and it’s difficult to get a handle on the complete picture of what is happening.
There’s a severe lack of reaction from the characters, they’re all a little one dimensional, or two dimensional in the MC’s case. No existential crises, no overreaction, no panic, no confusion, no questions. It’s all essentially just “Oh. ok. Sure.” The entire story just gets thrown right into the deep end from the start as a result.
We also barely know anything about the character. We know he was a human, he was male, he wore glasses, and was a fan of some shows. We don’t know his name, we don’t know what he looks like, we don’t know how he acts or anything. Yes, it doesn’t really matter because of the circumstances but that’s actually not true. All those little facts about him should be affecting his decisions, but we don’t know anything substantial.
This has just become a chaotic blur of a roller coaster ride. Thrown straight in to confusing loops and mind-bending turns. It was never fully explained what the starting voice was, only assumed it was a part of him. It wasn’t at all explained why he had a “tell”. Why was he given his abilities, why has he created what he has, so on and so forth.
Hell he said he planned to create MLP but he’s yet to even get started on that. Instead he made Doctor Who with pseudo-ponies.
All in all, this first chapter is a confusing mess that I’m not a fan of. Good story idea, yeah, I’ve only seen 1 other story with a similar idea and I like it. But the execution is all wrong, it needs more..l substance. The characters need to actually react to things, to have more emotions, and you definitely need to slow down your pacing.
i hope you upload the next chapter soon. i really wanna read it. i've been coming back every day to see if the next chapter is available. please dont stop writing.
10130079
Well...of course the characters have basically zero development. It's literally been 1 chapter. This chapter is usually reserved for establishing what's going on, otherwise known as world building (quite literally in this case).
Character development comes right after the world building and we've seen some preliminary glimpses:
MC doesn't like being seen as superior or worshiped, which implies humility. Based on the fact that he's a fan of both Dr. Who and MLP, he's also likely younger, maybe in his late 20s/early 30s. There are also hints of a musical background on account of the piano scene.
As opposed to "jumping right in" he's had over 2000 years of practice by the time the Time Lords came into fruition. By all accounts it's obvious where this story is bound to go: viewing and interacting with ponies, not necessarily the adventures in creating them.
In other words, it's for him to grow along with his creations. Not making the creations inherently. I'd recommend sticking around this one for 3 or 4 chapters before passing judgement (assuming it doesn't die).
So this is basically just Godly Promotion(https://www.fimfiction.net/story/457978/godly-promotion)
10141878
10123833
would be godly promotion, if this story wasn't obviously dead.
I hope you upload the next chapter soon, cuz I'm about to stop looking.
10141900
It's not dead, I'm just a slow writer, my chapters usually average 30 pages, and it's only been a few weeks. I get a couple of paragraphs done every day, and I'm about a third of the way through the next chapter, but I'm not an author who posts an update every week. Believe me, I wish I was.
10141900
The next chapter should be up in about 2 weeks, since I decided to split it. Thanks for your patience and sorry for the wait.
10142887
I appreciate you letting me know. I really enjoyed the first chapter and i really don't want to see this story die. IDC what anyone else says, I really enjoyed the premise. I think it would be really cool if at some point, when he creates Equis, that he would again assume pony form. I don't want him to be an alicorn or pegasus or unicorn. I think it would be great if he took the form of an unassuming red earth pony. (red because of his red foreleg) as for when in the timeline, perhaps it could start around the time of the three tribes, show him creating discord and show luna's transformation into nightmare moon. perhaps the main character could even have a hand in causing nightmare moon. and then end in twilight sparkle's era. I dunno. just what I would do. I don't want to see this story die.
I found the dracoequeuus form rather amusing. Coukd have come out rather like a sparkledog, but avoided that handily. Also I assume the "Its not paint" part was inplying hands covered in blood?