Aspiring writer, Steve Magnet disciple
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Anon is happy with Twilight. Really. She loves the ornate castle, the lovely meals she eats, and, most of all, loves Twilight herself. It's so wonderful and beautiful in Equestria that Anon almost forgets she used to be human.
Almost.
My fourth-place entry to the Filly Anon Contest. A different approach to the idea, leaning in a more serious direction than many authors take the concept.
Edited expertly by SirReal.
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Is that relevant?
Prior children?
I thought they were beside each other.
What does that mean?
What does that mean?
Wait, what?
Grady?
Situation?
Why?
It’s nice to see anon progress in this chapter, despite the fact she went back to her old self at the end.
Although this was a little confusing, it was still good.
So many questions, so little answers so far
Feels like it's not really complete. May be a sequel hook? Also, I had a feeling it might go so much darker than it did.
With the death tag, I was expecting this to end differently.
derpicdn.net/img/2019/5/18/2041799/large.png
10528759
A fancy way of saying back on the ground
Heh silly filly ain't got no hands. Sucks don't it?
Ngl this had me choking up a bit. The way you described that feeling of not being worth the effort, of feeling like you don't deserve love hit a little too close to home. Good story
I'm assuming that Anons just come and go? Doesnt make sense cause where tf are the rest tho. Mane 6 arent that old are they? Regardless, it was extremely good. And some more added, maybe explaining things in depth, would definitely help.
This is shaping up to be an interesting story. It's not that often you find a femanon story.
I'm still a tad confused, but enjoyable nonetheless.
Based on the title, tags and picture I had suspected another kind of story (I was picturing myself typing a 'what a wonderful tragedy'); if that was intended, I congratulate you. It has a kind of happy ending which for some reason feels bittersweet (may as well be the the reader's bias
).
I can't help but feel that the question of the other Anons can easily put this story into Dark or Horror territory. My initial thought was that there has only been one Anon--they just tweak his mind and/or body after he "acts up."
Love and want a series on this.
Plus, it plays into my belief that you go to where you want when you die.
Interesting. I’m curious what happened to the others. I assume most found something to do with themselves but some small part of me would like to think there is a small army of green fillies planning to storm the castle.
Wait.. this whole thing was vibing sinister as hell, but thats the end?
I feel cheated, but annoyed too because it wasn't intentional.
The style and color of this feels so familiar, for some reason. It's also really nice.
I really enjoyed this, but it left more questions then answers and the ending was really, super unsatisfying. What happened to the rest of Twilight's "children" and why are they gone? Are they all named Anon? And are they all little green fillies? Is the phenomenon of humans dying and waking up as filly anons like... a new thing? Is it being investigated? I feel like this is an opening to an entire world of interesting stories, and that these questions are never going to be answered D:
...why do I feel concerned?
Well yes, that would also be an issue... and if he buries it down, he'll never know how accepting Equestria is of that.
It does raise more questions than it answers... not sure if that's the point.
I keep expecting for the shoe to drop and twilight to go evil or something
This myth would not exist in this world unless you are implying that between this story and season 9 there was a war similar to WW2 and a country was trying to hide radar technology from the enemy's hands.
Very janky
10549680
I was thinking the same thing lol
Hey all! Sorry I took so long to respond to your comments, but I was busy with a few things and didn’t really have much time to sit down and think about what you all said. The fact the story was on the front page for a week and I was constantly getting updates even several days afterward didn’t help my disposition. However, I’m here now, so I’m going to hop to it!
10528972
Glad you enjoyed it!
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These comments point out the same things generally, so I’m giving an all-encompassing answer here. The story was not written as part of a series, but a singular work. The ambiguity presented was more a result of me trying to be economical with description and detail than trying to signal some nefarious intent on the side of the ponies. The idea Twilight or the others were doing something evil never even crossed my mind during the writing process of this story, since I was explicitly trying to go against other Filly Anon stories where Twilight or other ponies are borderline (or just straight out) abusive. I just wanted to do a story where both the ponies and Filly Anon were good, and the drama came mostly from a Filly Anon who hadn’t yet adjusted to her new home and the traumatic life they came from. I suspect most suspicions of a darker undercurrent to the story come from either the ambiguous description of Filly Anon’s angst (which, not being elaborated upon in-depth until the final chapter, might come off as suggestion of malfeasance on the ponies’ part), the mentions of other Anons (which I go into in the next paragraph), or the expectations many of us give this genre. A lot of Filly Anon stories either portray Filly Anon, the ponies themselves, or both as antagonistic in some manner so as to create conflict. Doing a story where nobody really is the villain or purposefully causing problems for the other is not only difficult, but makes many of us as readers suspicious. The story reads as too good to be true with the friendly Twilight and her emotional investment in a child who should just be disposable in this system, but the story instead doubles down that Twilight and the other girls are just that caring. I can actually understand why you might feel cheated of a sinister reveal; if this wasn't My Little Pony, most people would've laughed off this obscene amount of hospitality. I’m sorry if you thought the story was going in a darker direction, but that was not really my intention in writing this.
As for the other Anons mentioned in the story, neither I nor my editor really talked about them much. We pretty much came to the implicit agreement they were just out and about in the world once Twilight had set them on the right path, and that the Filly Anon shown was just one in a long many of Anons that appeared to Twilight after their demises on Earth. I pretty much established them as an excuse for why Twilight is so comfortable around Filly Anon (she’s done this multiple times before) and why the other Mane Six were initially wary around her (the other Anons were more akin to the foul-mouthed Filly Anons we usually see). It also established the fact Filly Anons appearing in Equestria wasn’t terribly unusual. A lot of other Filly Anon stories start with FA appearing in Equestria because they need to set up how Filly Anon perceives the world and how Equestria reacts to their presence. I wasn’t terribly interested in doing all that set-up and wanted to highlight how different this Filly Anon was to the archetypical Filly Anon we usually see, so I decided to merely establish other Anons had appeared before to show this Filly Anon was just another one going through the sluice, while also showing her individual personality in the breakfast scene. In hindsight, I realize it does leave a lot of open questions about how this “Twilight takes care of Filly Anons” system works and where the other Anons went, but as I said before, I wasn’t really interested in them. The focus was on Filly Anon and how she comes to accept that she doesn’t need to hate herself. Anything that didn’t contribute to this significantly was only briefly elaborated upon, for better or worse.
I hope this information helps in your understanding of the story, or at least my intentions in creating it. Whether it improves the story in your eyes or not, thank you for your input regardless.
10529199
I mostly put the Death tag just because there’s a description of death towards the end of the story. I wasn’t sure if it qualified as necessitating the Death tag, and at the time of uploading, I didn’t feel like bothering the mods with the question. So I put it there mostly as a precaution more than a signaler of the story’s tone.
10529424
That's actually the picture that inspired me to put that line in. It was one of those Filly Anon pictures that stuck with me when I first saw it, and I couldn't resist throwing in a reference to it the first chance I got.
10529721
Were this a Spider-Man crossover, you could’ve used this instead.
10529823
Yeah, this was one of the main reasons I wanted to write this story. I think a lot of people go through this feeling at least once in their lives, and the worse off of us go through it for almost our whole lives. I’ve only read a few Filly Anon stories where the implicit self-loathing and fear the character would feel were examined, so I really wanted to tap that vein and see if I could make something out of that situation. I’m happy you found that aspect understandable and affecting.
10530240
I thought it was more of a happy ending, but I can see where you’d perceive it as bittersweet. Anon is still lost in a world they don’t understand, but they can at least fully allow themselves the parental figures of Twilight and the other Mane 6 she never had in her previous life. In fact, thinking about it now, I wish I’d emphasized the need for parental figures a little more in the story.
10530828
It’s funny. As I said above, I wrote this as a single stand-alone story throughout the whole process. I had no real intentions of creating a series or sequel, since I felt I only needed one story to focus on Anon coming to terms with the need for her to accept love.
In the month since I published this story, however, the idea of sequels have pervaded me. Enough people enjoyed this story (it’s my most popular story at this moment) and the set-up of the story naturally produces a lot of sequel possibilities (Twilight cares for multiple Anons, then sends them out into the world). A few ideas have danced in my head about how this could be done, whether through Anon going off on some adventure with one of the Mane 6 or how she could run into another Anon who’s more similar to the traditional Anon characterization (swears a lot, acts obnoxious etc.).
That being said, I am not going to make any promises of sequels at this point. I have a good number of other stories that either need to be finished or completed stories that I think do need sequels, so trying to ride the brief wave of attention this story gave me with another Filly Anon tale doesn’t appeal to me. I won’t completely rule a sequel out; I may stumble across another idea I think would be a good fit for this kind of Filly Anon. But for the time being, it’s not going to be the first thing on my mind.
And yeah, I hope there's a place for us after death too.
10531144
Well, I don’t know about the castle, but I know they’ve already tried to storm Twilight’s treehouse.
10532441
The writing style should seem familiar, as it was actually your story, Flashback, which was the main inspiration for this story. I really liked the idea you presented of a serious Filly Anon story, and I even considered writing a story more akin to your dark portrayal of the Filly Anon character. However, I decided I really didn’t like many of the tropes you used like the abusive Twilight or the dystopian Equestria, so I decided to go in the complete opposite direction story-wise. While your story’s idea of a self-hating and introspective Filly Anon is still evident in this story, I went with the idea that Filly Anon’s hatred was entirely wrought upon herself or the people in her past life, and that she needed to open up to the ponies in order to fully get over her problems. Consider it a happier riff on your story’s ideas.
Thanks for the inspiration, and glad you enjoyed the story!
10549680 10584759
Applejack is in the pocket of the Big Carrot Lobby. How else do you explain a busy apple farmer having the time to visit the head of state every moon and never fret about finances?
(On a serious note, interesting history lesson. Now I want to know who started the nonsense about cramps if you swam within two hours after eating.)
10585730
Just like we only hear our own voice as others do in recording, a story can look very different to a writer who knows why each part is at it is and a reader who's figuring it out as they go. It's a phenomenon hardly unique to fanfic - everything from the show to great novels are the same way. And there's a fair bit of debate over whether the authorial intent or what the readers take from it should be pre-eminent - complicated by how different readers can take different things.
10585854
Yeah, it is a prickly question, and one of many reasons having an editor is so necessary. I wasn't trying to invalidate your or others critiques of the story, but more to provide my perspective on why I made some of the decisions I made. In fact, I'm glad you did just so I know how to avoid such issues later on and find a way to balance brevity in description with clarity of story.
10585730
I'm flattered. Thank you.
I'm in this story and I feel attacked. I started tearing up at the first chapter and haven't stopped yet.
... Will the other sodding boot just fall already?!
The tension is giving me ulcers here!
10585959
Honestly I was not expecting such a feels trip when I clicked on this story, but damn this was good. You explored the feelings of insecurity really well here, with Anon feeling like a victim of abuse that doesn't want to upset her new mother out of fear of being punished or kicked out alongside her obvious lack of self worth. The story wasn't fully just sad stuff and had some pretty humorous moments (particularly Rarity's little 'You little dear' moment) which helped it feel more alive and genuine.
The only thing I that think could've been explored more was her identity, I feel like you did attempt to poke at the subject, but didn't really get deep into the matter (such as when she corrects herself for using her old pronouns). I feel like this fic could've greatly benefitted from showing us some kind of body dysmorphia or gender dysphoria to help flesh out how the character feels about their new body.
Overall, this fic was a pretty fun read with some good character development and the right level of angst to make it touching without feeling forced. The only complaint I have is that I thought it was gonna be more of a horror story after the first couple chapters, as they do carry a lot of suspense and the entire 'other Anon Fillies' sounded like something sinister was going on. Even so, it's still a nice read with some really good moments. Consider this reader thoroughly satisfied.
10693597
Thanks for the feedback! I'm always happy to see somebody comment on my stories. I’m glad you largely enjoyed the story, as it was one that I thought would alienate a lot of people with the dour storyline in a genre usually focused on comedy. Seeing so many people enjoy it or even outright relate to it makes me feel all the more accomplished as a writer.
One of the most amusing things about many Anon stories, at least to me, is the fact that Anon never really feels like they could be anybody. Sure, there's an attempt to give them a general crassness and over-the-top attitude, but Anon in general has become virtually unanonymous through the sheer amount of stories we've done with this archetype. In my story, I purposefully wanted to make Filly Anon feel like they could be any mild-mannered, beaten down person who landed here. The kind of person with such low self-worth that they would land in Heaven instead of Hell and assume there's been a mistake. This is why Filly Anon actively refuses to talk about her troubles in my story, because she thinks discussing her problems are just tossing them onto others, much like how she was tossed from guardian to guardian to be “somebody else’s problem”. This was, in my own weird way, to truly make Filly Anon anonymous; after all, how many people in this world feel such inefficacy? It’s also why there are mentions of previous Filly Anons who were under Twilight’s care, since this gives an excuse for our Filly Anon to have a degree of self-loathing. You can practically hear Filly Anon imagining Twilight and the others saying, “All those other Anons were troublemakers. Surely you’re not like them?” It’s not a case of the ponies being malevolent so much as the weird system the Anons appear through (which neither the Anons nor Twilight had a hoof in deciding whether to participate in or not) creates a perfect storm for somebody with this mindset to be utterly battered down.
Funny thing is, I actually did consider going that "body/gender dysphoria" route in the early writing stages. Transformation fiction is something that's always fascinated me, and the inherent concept of Filly Anon lends itself well to exploring such ideas. However, I found that a lot of other Filly Anon stories focused on that adjustment between forms (albeit largely in a more comedic and emotionally restrained way), and most of them tended to make that the main focus of their story. This isn't bad from a storytelling perspective of course, but I felt a lot of stories became so focused on Filly Anon's initial appearance and adjustment to Equestria that a good chunk of their wordcount was more set-up than execution. This story starts well after this Filly Anon first appeared because I wanted to focus on the emotional turmoil in a different way. Filly Anon is (mostly) adjusted to her new position in Equestria, but the walls she’s put up in order to deal with the change are starting to crumble under the pressure of her self-enforced anonymity. The story’s first act is basically starting where a lot of other Filly Anon stories would have their second act. In hindsight, this method did have somewhat of a drawback, as many readers assumed like you did that there was some kind of nefarious intent on the ponies' parts. Had I did the traditional opening many Filly Anon stories have, this would've likely never crossed anybody's minds. I’d always intended the ponies to be sincere in their attempts to help Filly Anon, though I can now look back and see how the current execution might lead readers to the opposite opinion (the lack of elaboration for how this Filly Anon/Twilight system works doesn’t help either). It's something I'll keep in mind for the next story I decide to do in this environment and these characters.
Anyways, sorry to have written so much for a single comment. You just jogged my memories for a couple aspects of this story, and I really wanted to talk about them. Plus, I never turn down somebody with a kind word to say about my stories. Positivity should beget positivity in this sour-sack world, and I wanted you to know your opinions/feelings were appreciated.
Thanks again!
like AJ would say: what in tarnation is going on here
10941350
Thanks for pointing this out! Though the first one is actually Rarity outstretching her hoof to Anon, so the sentence is technically correct, but I changed the wording a bit to make that more clear.
really cute and good story