“For it’s such a lovely day,/To have to always feel this way.” –Portishead, ‘Wandering Star’
On a visit to Ponyville, Princess Luna tries to connect with the common pony. But there seems to be one common pony that seems to catch her eyes.
You gotta kick at the darkness until it bleeds daylight.
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That was cute
Short. But sweet.
Take this and feel praised!
Not bad at all
That last line is totally true. I hope somebody else does a MacxLuna story that is longer and goes more in depth with their relationship
Whut?
Skilled reference to Napoleon Boneparte
Very nice.
I think Big Mac x Luna is my favourite ship, but this is feels really rushed. Like you arent a bad writer, its just that your pacing is off a little. One of the most enjoyable parts of reading a romance (For me) Is reading about how these characters fell for eachother.
Other than that though there really isnt any criticism, your grammar is good, the characters feel in character, and the dialogue, at least between Luna and Twilight is good so far
it was a fairly good short fic... Could've been longer in the details or the story-line (more conflict and length I mean), but otherwise, it was a good read
Interesting.
How could I have missed it ? It was so obvious and I didn't think of it. Mac, Luna, and Flutters, are the most subdued of the subdued characters. I was so taken up with FlutterMac, that I couldn't imagine Luna developing an interest in Mac as well. The three of them each have their own form of shyness. Each needs to develop some kind of friendship with other ponies. This could be a very dynamic romantic triangle, if handled in the right way, with the help and support of all their friends. I see great things ahead for them.