I am genuinely shocked by how much I'm enjoying these characters and the story. Amazing.

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Thank you ^^

That honestly means alot to hear, me and Jackelope put alot of work into each and every chapter of this, so hearing that people like it really makes our day :)

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Thank you. Sincerely.

Heh. I don't remember reading a story ever where Spike had a normal-sized dick. It's, on exceedingly rare occasions, tiny, or so long he doesn't need wings to fly if he swings it around fast enough.

Good on him to consider peaceful solutions. I don't think To'achuu knows quite what he could bring down on their heads. Everyone's going to think they used Mind-Control because ponies know it's real. They have zero reason to believe Cadance just randomly went insane.

Also, I'm half-expecting some poor zebra to open a door to a smiling mare. "Hello! I'm Starlight Glimmer. I'm here to visit my friend, Sunburst!"

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Heh. I don't remember reading a story ever where Spike had a normal-sized dick. It's, on exceedingly rare occasions, tiny, or so long he doesn't need wings to fly if he swings it around fast enough.

Yeah, but who doesn't like Spike being hung like a horse

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He's usually hung more than the literal horses around him. That's kind of the point.

Though it's a welcome change to have his zebra partner be smaller than him down there, as well as a nice way to break Dansaar from the problematic conventions of his homeland. So, it's actually a plot point here instead of just fetish fodder!

I love it and am excited to see more of spike! The relationship between these two is adorable.

One thing though, the rest of the characters in this universe are clothed but unless I missed it, spike is not? That struck me as odd, it went from spike admiring dansaar stripping nude, to just spikes cock becoming visible. Not sure if it was intentional.

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I looked at some references for Spike's genitals and more often than not his organ comes out of a genital slit. Spike is also the only 'nude' character in the story, more in line with his show self. There is a tinge of irony about that which will get addressed, don't worry.

Small future spoiler: Since Spike is becoming a Jala for Dansaar, there are some things 'expected' of him as such if he is to embrace the role. Do not be surprised that their next sighting involves as a makeshift loincloth.

Thank you for your praise. It means a ton. I'm glad you're enjoying it.

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The Shining 'chapter' was subject to a great deal of, uh, scrutiny behind the scenes. It will get addressed next time we see both of them together again. It was rushed due to the length of time between the chapter before it and we thought people were getting impatient. Now you might point out that the current chapter had a way larger gap. True. However, unlike that chapter, we rewrote swathes of the Spike x Dansaar smut chapter and paced it out sufficiently to avoid the same problems. However, the biggest issue with Shining and To'Achuu is that of the couples, they've had the least amount of time together to build their relationship. And even though Hajaa and Thorax only really interacted via dialogue in sprinkles in chapters before their sex scene, we made up for it with a lengthy and revealing conversation between the two on their next interaction. Furthermore, of the three sex scenes, theirs was the first we envisioned when we began the story (Shining tied up, forced upon in an orientation play-esque scene) but due to how the story turned out, I think we failed to see that thematically it was very out of place (The To'Achuu we envisioned when starting out would have done it, the To'Achuu we ended up writing would not). I think I have the authority to apologise on behalf of us both for such a large blunder.

In most clopfics that pertain to invasions the invading force bulldozes on in and screws the mares into submission making them confess that they're sex crazed animals who'd sellout their long term loyal partners for a bigger beef stick. Though I'm aware it's clopfic world so real world conceqences don't apply. Especially if the princesses happily give up the keys to the kingdoms to any Dragon/Changeling/Zebra/Griffon/Human/Demon and are hailed as saviors over it. Finally! A fic that shows what happens when that gloriously backfires. Keep up the good work.

I'm glad you like how we tackled it. Originally, it was going to be something in the vein of that, except instead of females selling out their males, it was going to be the other way around. However whilst writing the prologue and the lead up to chapter 3, we started having different ideas about how to handle the tribe and a lot of others. I, for one, grew so attached to Dansaar in his introduction in the prologue (introducing To'Achuu) that I wanted him to play a greater role. Deer became enamoured with the idea of Thorax x Hajaa as well as the whole 'striping' idea which I got on board with also. And because we ended up writing characters who didn't seem nearly mean enough to sexually conquer Equestria, we decided to inject a little more nuance and sympathy. I'm glad we took a more story-heavy route when handling this fic in the end.

I hope that Cadance's brazen has devastating aftereffects.

(I mean the Princess of Love just outed herself as a slut and would have happily sacrificed all of them for her own pleasure. If that hits the public that would destroy the faith the stallions have in the mares and make them greet their overlords with open arms among other things.)

We'll have to see, won't we?

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Ah yea I'm not against this was just more confused. I may suggest maybe having it be mentioned like in an earlier chapter like when spike is thinking about his sexuality or something or when he meets dansaar, but since it's gets addressed later it might be fine.

yea I'm loving them so much, spike slowly bringing out Dansaar's confidence is great. I just hope spike doesn't lose his confidence too much could see him being the power bottom mentioned, but less dominating and more like egging dansaar on Hope we don't have to wait too long to see more of them.

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yea I'm loving them so much, spike slowly bringing out Dansaar's confidence is great. I just hope spike doesn't lose his confidence too much

With Spike's ego? Not a chance!
Spoiler:

Hope we don't have to wait too long to see more of them.

Not too long.

Finallyyy someone does a frot scene as a first time! You have any idea how long I've been waiting for a gay mlp fic with two characters having a first experience that doesn't skip straight to the 'bend over and bite the pillow' stage?

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I do hope this means it doesn't go too far the other way and make the zebra's too nice. I think a middle ground of grayness would benefit this story. They are technically the story's antagonist after all. I will complain that every character so far feels a little too.... complacent with the take over even if there's in story reasons to explain why. So something to help show the consequences of that complacency would be nice.

the clop scene with spike was really good. probably the best scene in this story to date and I don't usually even like anthro clop. Does this mean spike will be getting stripes soon too? like Thorax? I hope we see it.

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are they the antagonists? If any one is it's cadence but I don't feel like this story has an antagonist. The conflict isn't really about the zebras taking over, it's more about the developing relationships and each party adapting to the other's culture.

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I do hope this means it doesn't go too far the other way and make the zebra's too nice. I think a middle ground of grayness would benefit this story. They are technically the story's antagonist after all. I will complain that every character so far feels a little too.... complacent with the take over even if there's in story reasons to explain why. So something to help show the consequences of that complacency would be nice.

I don't want to spoil the entire story but I will hint that the 'grayness' is something that will be brought up in the next chapter. Whilst the main protagonists (the exception being Spike, who actively wants to work towards putting things back to 'normal') are okay/approving of the state of affairs, I do want to dip into non-conforming perspectives. Cadance was outright imprisoned by To'Achuu for personal reasons but it would make logical sense if not ever pony in the castle is approving of the change in leadership. There's also the added reminder that people outside of the castle do not yet know what has happened (chapter 3, 4, 5 and 6 taking place within the same day and within hours of each other). There's plenty left to explore and I can't wait for us to write it. I do think 'antagonist' is a strong word. They disrupt the natural order but the intent isn't to cause harm or destruction as such. Cadance, arguably, served this role since she not only wanted to give her realm to the zebras but she also desired the stallions/ponies to become subservient to them.

When the story was first conceived it was going to be black and white, the zebras irredeemable but charming with Cadance still fulfilling the same role as a whore fully prepared to surrender her realm for cock before getting bluelipped by the homosexual preferences of the zebras. And, like most stories of this type, the males would immediately surrender themselves to the 'superior' lovers found in the invading zebras and yada yada. One element of this does remain in some way, but instead of it being a sort of 'sexual supremacy' it's more of a... 'these guys are really hard to hate' vibes. In the Spike chapter in fact we wanted to establish the fact also that not every guard/stallion in the castle suddenly became gay for zebras with the mention of 'friendships', but we have had a few ideas on how to expand on this I.E. why have the guards and staff who haven't become gay still keeping things under wraps. Considering in the timeline thus far the coup has just
happened, there hasn't been a ton of time for people 'in the know' to digest it quite yet. There's also the issue of the mares, who look so far to have been largely neglected and forgotten but will get addressed eventually.

the clop scene with spike was really good. probably the best scene in this story to date and I don't usually even like anthro clop. Does this mean spike will be getting stripes soon too? like Thorax? I hope we see it.

I'm glad you liked it. The decision to make the story anthro was to facilitate some of the fetishes. As you may have noticed, there's a strong presence of twinks/femboys/traps/etcetera, which would have been more difficult to do were the characters fully equine. The Thorax striping scene I would argue wouldn't have been quite the same was it done with the characters being on four legs. Regarding the question: Maybe ;)

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From what I've learned in writing is a antagonist and a villain can be two separate things. which is why I called the zebra's technically the story's antagonists and not the story's villain. the story's villain is of course Cadence, given how she is off her rocker arranged this whole thing in the first place, but she is not the main antagonist.

Finally got around to reading this chapter and I have to say I’m throughly pleased. The pacing felt natural and so did the characters, I especially enjoy the part where they slow get more comfortable with each other instead of jumping right into smexy time. I was surprised to discover this is just a spike and Dansaar chapter, which I’m all for. While spike is my favorite character (and best boy), this’ll give our other couples plenty of room to be “explored” as well. I do hope you two continue the good work and until next time, take care. ^>^

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There are no clear antagonists yet, I'd argue. If the princesses, the Bearers, or Starlight Glimmer appears, they could take on that role. Mind you, "antagonist" doesn't mean "bad guy". In the case of this story, it might just be something like Spike desperately trying to make sure his Ponyville friends don't notice what happened with Cadance out of fear what they'd do to his new friend/lover, and that makes them the antagonists in the scenario.

You DO NOT want an angry Mane Six rampaging through your city. Or any of the Alicorns, for that matter.

If there is a major weak point in the story so far, it's... Cadance. Other characters have understandable motivations. Not so with her. Unlike minor characters from the show, we have a fairly good idea of her personality, and the story threw it out the window right at the start without a very convincing explanation. She feels like a sacrifice for the story's premise more than a believable, natural character, and that's highly unfortunate.

Sadly, I see no good way to resolve the issue. The entire point of her reveal before the court was the wasn't corrupted by some kind of magic or alchemy. She just naturally degraded into the opposite of everything the character stands for, throwing away her life, love, destiny, and child, because of... a dirty book. Even Fall of Equestria(!) used mind-magic to explain such a change.

Side note, I do hope, at some point, one of the non-Zebras brings up the possibility that Cadance actually was made to act like she did. We know she wasn't, but THEY don't, and if the Zebras deny it? Well, of course they would deny it if they are guilty, right?

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Yeah, I know how you feel about Cadance and I can respect that.

In truth, the story started out as a parody of traditional Zebradom/Zebra Supremecy fics where the mares of the story (usually Cadance) decides to completely betray their husbands and loves for the sake of getting that phat Zebra dick.

In this story, we really wanted to parody and crap on that kind of troupe, by making the Zebras actually normal guys (tho they do have wierd customs and are very gay XD) who the cucking mare *thinks* is out to fuck them and conquer Equestria when really they are nothing like that at all.

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In a sense, you became victim to your own success. Because this story has far outgrown any notion of being just a mere parody fic.

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cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/615975770799472690/740040312398807080/sufferinh.PNG

Hmm. Why does the story have dark and Non-con as part of its tags when so far it has been generally light-hearted?

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It's mostly because of the last Shining chapter. Shining didn't outright give his consent for the smexy times he had with To'Achuu until afterwards I believe, so we just wanted to make absolutely sure about that.

As for the dark, that is mainly there to cater to the stories more subversive aspects.

Well I know what I'm reading later.

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Mwuahahahah

We have ensnared another one!

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Oh, I assure you: I was dreaming about juicy bottom bois long before you ever joined us here in the depravity pits.

Overall it's pretty good. The sex is hot and the characters with the notable exception of Cadance seem in character.
Cadance though just feels absolutely OOC. She is not that selfish nor that stupid.

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Yeah lol, Cadance being OOC is kinda the point of the subversion of expectations.

In the ZebraDom fics that this story is making fun of/parodying has her act exactly like that.

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I don't know. Most have her be a little better in character than this.

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She almost instantly sells her husband into Zebra Cuckoldry and Slavery because they have bigger dicks.

Yeah, this is par for the course in Zebra fics NGL

Ass down, face up

I feel like this part is backwards.

Also it's going to be hard to keep playing pretend once Spike's three times his size. "No but, like, proportionally I'm totally bigger, guys!"

10444102
That was intentional XD

Especially considering his next line is "Aren't you a bold one."

Y-you dare add hand holding!
That's a degenerate fetish; that none ever think of during sex
I'm unphased by anything; but the concept of-of hand holding and that shebangs, is far off

judging by the coverart, will our three protagonists be eventually feminized by their zebra masters?

From the previous chapter:

“Then… Wh-what if an Irra and Jala… break up?” he asked out of curiosity sake, a break-up between them at this stage beyond premature.

“Other than the unfathomable number of hours required to scrub it off, nothing much beyond that unless you count hurt feelings. However in certain places in my homeland many punishments could be levied against Jalas who would refuse an Irra. If an Irra broke from his Jala in these places, there was merely a stigma attached to the bottom. For a Jala to break from an Irra is typically seen as an offence to the natural way of things. Whilst not universal, there are tribes who will begin to shun such the offending Jala. They become forbidden from removing their Irra’s brand. It will become a mark of disobedience and shame at worst, and a mark of dissatisfaction at best. That’s how several members of the tribe ended up with us,” Hajaa spoke casually, although his tone betrayed an inflection of anger behind it.

In this chapter:

“That’s not a good thing! It’s bad, very bad! Especially for me.”

“Why?”

"Because in our society, when your… thingis smaller than your bonded, it means you are the lesser of the two. The submissive one. The… inferior. That’s what I meant before when I said our position was dictated by size," he explained, frowning.

"But... I don't think you are inferior…"

Okay, taking in the information given in the previous chapter and in this one, I believe that Spike's SO was from another tribe or had a bad experience from the (few) jerks in his tribe thar messed him up. Going off of what Thorax's SO stated most Jalas came to the tribe after turning down the feelings of a Irra (or let's get real; probably to escape some kind of abuse). While I don't believe Spike's SO is trying to be deceitful; I do think he might be new to the tribe or was severely traumatized by previous events. This is naturally clouding his view as to what being a Irra means and is making him think negatively about his status and self-worth.

Given that we haven't been given a reason to distrust the zebras in this story and the information dealt out by the characters this is the most likely conclusion. And, if that's the case, this opens up the door for character development in Spike's SO. Maybe after experiencing what it is to be a Irra and, most importantly, seeing how well Spike is treated despite being an Jala his lovers confidence starts to grow.

As he begins to realize how negative he had been before and that he had been seeing everything in a jaded light due to trauma resulting in Spike's SO being able to move past it.

I sincerely hope you will continue this. And I say this as a one-hundred percent straight dude.

I see the usual Zebradom works again and again and again and again. And whenever I do, I am reminded of this refreshing, interesting alternate take on the usual tropes. I want to see what happens next. Because unlike the usual Zebradom stuff where the kinks don't work for me and the plot is utterly predictable, I actually don't know what'll happen here, but it's so engaging that I want to know. It helps that most of the characters are likeable and complex as far as I can see.

Heck, you actually have a REASON for why they're all stallions. Usual Zebradom doesn't even try to address the existence of Zebra mares in most cases.

So is this a dead story? Really wish it wasn't. First zebradom story I've read that I've actually enjoyed. Really great premise here.

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There are plans to continue this in time, just gotta give us some time lol

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Well I hope to see it soon then! It's a great story. It'd be a shame for it to go unfinished :)