• Published 14th Jan 2020
  • 2,465 Views, 742 Comments

Twilight Tries... - Peni Parker



There are many things Twilight Sparkle has never tried, but she's going to try some of them with you in her new vlog!

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Coffee

Is this thing on? I can’t tell if it’s on.

Spike! I need you to help me figure out if this thing is on!

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Yes, there's a little red light on at the top!

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What?! The light means that it’s on?! And that it’s recording right now?! Oh son of a….


Hi, everypony! Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship, here, and welcome to the inaugural episode of Twilight Tries, a new vlog I’m doing where I try something new for the first time and share it with you.

Now, you might be wondering why I’m doing this, and the answer is actually really simple; because I think it’ll be fun! My friend Sunset Shimmer said she does something like this where she records herself playing video games and that she really enjoys sharing it with others, so I thought, ‘Hey, why don’t I give it a try?’ I won’t be playing video games though since I’m not much of a gamer, and there already appear to be a lot of ponies who post videos of themselves playing video games, so instead I’ll be trying something new every video and sharing my reaction with you.

One thing I feel I should mention before I begin, don’t expect me to be trying anything lewd or illegal here.

And with that being said, for the very first episode of Twilight Tries, I’ll be trying…coffee!

That’s right, I have never had coffee before. Most ponies think I’m an avid coffee drinker because of all the late nights I’ve spent studying or performing princess duties over the years, but I’m not. Why have I never had coffee before? Honestly, I’m not entirely sure. I guess it’s just because I’ve never felt a need for it or even a desire to try it.

That changed though when I was brainstorming ideas for this first episode with my assistant, Spike, and I noticed him drinking a cup of coffee. Spike’s been a coffee drinker for years. Come to think of it, he’s been a coffee drinker ever since he was old enough to start being my assistant. I wonder if there’s a connection there?

Anyways, when I saw him with his cup of joe I figured that coffee would be the perfect thing to try for my first episode!

So if you look over to my right, your left, you’ll see that I have a measuring cup filled with water, a coffee mug a 30.5 oz. can of Marewell House coffee, courtesy of Spike, and a single cup coffee maker. The can of Marewell House is about half-empty, but that shouldn’t be a problem.

Time to make some coffee! First I’m going to…um…I’m going to…

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Spike! How do I use this thing?!


Okay, so Spike said that first I need to do is put the coffee mug right under the dispenser on the machine, duh, and then I need to pour the water into the top of the machine.

There we go. Mug in, water poured.

Now I need to take this little scoop out of the front of the machine and use it to scoop the coffee out of the can. Makes sense.

So as I’m looking at the scoop I’m seeing that there are two max fill lines, which doesn’t make much sense to me.

Spike! Which max fill line do I fill the scoop up to?!

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The top one?! Okay, thanks!

Aaaaand, there. Filled up to the top line.

So now that the scoop is full I’m going to place it back in the machine, like so, and then close it back up.

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Spike! What do I do once I put the scoop back in?!

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Choose my brew type by pushing one of the buttons on the side?!

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Yeah, I see them, thanks!

Okay, so now I have to choose what brew type I want, and it looks like I can choose either Regular or Bold. I’m a bit tempted to choose Bold, but since this is my first time having coffee I think it’s best if I go with Regular. So I’m just going to push the Regular button here.

Oh, a little light came on when I pressed it. I guess that means it’s working.

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Nothing’s happening.

Spike! Nothing’s happening!

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It’s takes a little while to start?! How long…oh, wait, never mind, it’s starting!

So as you can see, the coffee is starting to pour out of the machine and into my mug.

Although, it appears that it’s just kind of dripping out instead of pouring out.

Spike! The coffee is only dripping out!

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What?! It’s supposed to do that because it’s a drip style maker?! Okay, got it!

The dripping is normal.

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This is taking longer than I thought it would.

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While we wait, how about we take a closer look at the type of coffee I’ll be drinking? Let me just get the can here.

Let’s see, ‘Marewell House Original Roast Ground Coffee, Medium Roast’. I have no idea what ‘Original Roast’ or ‘Medium Roast’ means.

Spike! What does…oh, never mind, coffee’s about done!

Aaaaand, done. My mug is full. Now I’ll just take it out…whew, that is a strong smell…and go ahead a take my very first sip of coffee.

Cheers!

*Slurp*

*Ptoo*

OH SWEET CELESTIA IS THAT BITTER! UGH, THAT’S THE MOST BITTER THING I’VE EVER TASTED!

SPIKE! HOW DO YOU DRINK THIS STUFF EVERYDAY?!

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ACQUIRED TASTE?! HOW IN EQUESTRIA COULD ANY CREATURE GET ACQUIRED TO THIS?! IT’S LIKE DRINKING DIRT!

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NEVER MIND, JUST BRING ME SOME WATER OR SOMETHING TO GET THE TASTE OUT OF MY MOUTH!

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I CAN HEAR YOU LAUGHING, SPIKE! THIS ISN’T FUNNY, MY TASTEBUDS FEEL LIKE THEY’RE DYING! UGH, UGH!


So, yeah…coffee. I don’t think I like it. No offense to all you coffee drinkers out there, but I don’t see the appeal of drinking something so absinthian.

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Well excuuuse me for liking my drinks to be on the sweeter side, Spike!

Anyways, thank you so much for watching, and I hope to see you again soon on Twilight Tries!

Author's Note:

If there's something you'd like to see Twilight try, please let me know in the comments!

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