• Published 19th Aug 2012
  • 7,031 Views, 91 Comments

JonTron: Equestria - 16BitHeros

After watching Birdemic: shock and Terror the Broadway musical Jon spontaneously explodes.

  • ...

Chapter 2

After the less-than-stellar first contact Jon and Jacques decided that following the creature was their best shot at getting home. Standing, Jon surveyed his surroundings. Groves of apple trees, each filled with large red apples were on both sides of the wide dirt trail he was on. In one direction the trees extended for what he could only assume were miles, going well beyond the horizon. In the other direction he saw an old farmhouse. He and Jacques agreed that that was likely where their welcome party had run off to.

“Come on Jon, we need to get moving. I want to go home.” Jacques said

“Now hold on a second, ‘snot every day you get to go to a new universe you know, why uh, why don’t we look around a bit?” replied Jon

“Do I have to remind you what happened the last time you procrastinated from making videos?” Jacques said, looking at jon.

“You don’t mean-”

“Yes Jon, the war.”

Images of a darker time flooded Jon’s mind, he recalled the war, the war that began when he took a break from releasing videos without warning. The war that claimed so many lives on his behalf.

“I-I can still hear the screaming, Jacques I can still hear them, they’re inside my head Jacques. I tried to save them; you gotta believe me, but the fires…”

“It’s okay Jon, calm down, we can stop that from happening again, but we need to hurry.”

“You’re right Jacques; I can’t let that happen, not again, not ever again.” Said Jon

And so the duo hurried to the farm house desperate for answers to how they arrived, and more importantly, a way home.

After walking for a while something caught Jon’s eye. In the middle of the orchard was a small pink building about the size of a chicken coop. Jon could tell from where he was that something inside it was moving.

“Hey Jacques, you see dat? I think somethin’ is in there.” Jon whispered.

Approaching cautiously, Jon walked to one of the building’s windows and peered inside. The interior of the building was plasters with posters of a blue horse with a rainbow colored mane. In the middle of the small clubhouse sat three small ponies, the one from earlier and two new ones; a white Unicorn with a light purple mane and an orange Pegasus with a violet mane and rather small wings. The yellow one was apparently telling a story about Jon to the other two. From what he could tell the horses could speak English.

“So Jon, what do you see?” Jacques said, perhaps a bit too loudly.

The three ponies turned their heads to Jon, locking eyes with him and staring for a moment, before the yellow one screamed, “THERE IT IS!”

“SHIET!” Jon shouted ducking down below the window. “Do you think they saw us?”

A few moments of silence later the white unicorn stuck its head out from around the far corner of the building.

Staring at Jon it shouted back, presumably to one of its friends, “Hey Applebloom, are you sure this is the alien you saw?”

“yeah.” A voice with a drawl yelled back.

“but you said he had claws,” the white pony continued “And sharp teeth, and red eyes. This thing isn’t so scary.”

“hey, I’m scary.” Said Jon, “tell ‘em Jacques.”

“He’s a pansy, he couldn’t even finish the lion king in one sitting.” Jacques said to the pony.

“y’know Jacques, if you’d just agree with me for once this whole ordeal would go by a lot faster. This is why we need to work on our communication skills, okay? Jus’-jus’ help me out here, please?” Jon said Irritated by Jacques remark. Turning his attention to the pony he added, “Don’t listen to him, he’s a compulsive liar.”

“No I’m not!” Said an outraged Jacques.

“See ‘dat? Unbelievable, why you gotta keep lyin’ like ‘dat Jacques? Is’ not helpin’ your case.”

By now both the orange and yellow ponies were looking at Jon and Jacques, less like children facing a monster and more like a how person looks a crazy homeless man talking to himself.

The orange one spoke next and said, more to her friends then Jon, “Hey, what if we take him to the town? I’m sure anypony would pay to see an alien!”

This bothered Jon, and he spoke up, “You know I have a say in this too, I have rights, this is America, no, no it’s not, where the hell am I anyway, horse world?”

“horse world? You’re in Equestria.” Said the yellow pony.

“Oh,is’- is’ Equestria Jacques, you know, ‘cause is’ full of horses. THAS’ JUST FUCKIN’ BRILLIANT!”

“Are you sure that’s a good Idea Scootaloo?” said the white pony to the orange pony. “He seems kind of… weird.”

“Sweetie Belle’s got a point Scootaloo, maybe we should just start by taking him down to the farm.” The yellow horse said to her friend.

“Alright Applebloom, I guess having the whole town freak out would be a bad thing.” Said Scootaloo.

The three fillies began walking in the direction of the farm and Jon followed. The three were very curious and asked Jon as many questions as possible. From “Where are you from”, to “How does your bird talk” no question went unanswered. They also told Jon about themselves, hi didn’t ask then to; hearing the life stories of three little ponies wasn’t really very high on his priority list, but they did it anyways. They told him how Ponies in their universe receive a mark on their flank when they discover what makes them unique, and how they became friends to find their special talents. They told him they called themselves “the cutie mark crusaders”, and did everything they could to see if they could find their talents. Jon found it odd that they didn’t try to capitalize on one thing they were skilled at and instead did as much random and dangerous shit as possible, but he didn’t point it out. Finally after Jon felt his head would explode if he heard the cutie mark crusaders theme again they reached the farmhouse.

The building was old and the paint was chipping in places, but it was well maintained. Applebloom gestured for Jon to enter.

The inside of the home was dark and But from what Jon could make out it was furnished with what most would call “antiques”.

“Hey, do you think you could turn on a light or somethin”? It’s pretty dark in h-“

“YA’AL STAY AWAY FROM HER!” a voice shouted from behind Jon, and with a sickening crack something hard struck the back of his head. Whatever hit him had hit him hard, and he was unconscious before he hit the ground.

Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
Comments ( 53 )

GOD DAMN YOU AND THE CLIFFHANGERS.......this is brilliant, I need more of this STAT:flutterrage:

your very good at getting jontrons humor down to a fine point. i...i can almost HEAR him talking in my head as im reading:twilightoops:

Cliiiiiicheeeeeeeeeeee ! :pinkiegasp:

You see dis? You see it? That story you wrote? Let me tell you sumthin...


I only read the title, and I already declare this the best fic ever. 5 stars, A+, 4 stars!

Friggin applejack pulling the. "Oh no, a creature that my sister KNOWS is with her, is following her, better hurt it" :ajbemused:
Apart from that

Hahaha loving it! :rainbowlaugh:

Aside from the few minor miffs I have with this story (grammar, descriptions, add more descriptions!), I absolutely love it. Fantastic crossover, I never would have thought that this kind of story could be written so well!

I hereby give you:

*Crappy drum roll*

Seven Asses.

I don't think you're doing Jacques' characterization right at all.

Jon's, however...is actually the only thing in this fic that keeps me reading, it's that good.

As others have said, the writing and descriptions need much more work, though.

Apple Jack you'r an idiot. :ajbemused:

“How does your bird talk”

I... never thought about it before! :pinkiegasp:

Birdemic: Broadway: -100 Googolplexes/ 10
Jontron: Equestria: 1 Googolplex^2/10

Bucking brilliant, man. Like, Fave, and Watch.

Hm... Make the chapters longer and you have me sold.
...Oh yea, and also:

1122957 I agree Jacques is a bit more dead pan.

This story, oh it's sublime, s'god like, s'GOOOOOOOOOOOD!:pinkiehappy:

I wonder how would Fluttershy react to Jacques.

Needs a bit 'o editorial work, but besides that. I'm okay with this.

I realized who needs to be in this story somewhere. This story needs Malkovich.

GOOD JOB! I've hesitated to read this after experiencing a REALLY bad tobuscus crossover...


God damnit Errplejack! Ya gotta stop beaten people over the head.

Waiting for new chapters of this is just like waiting for new jontron videos, you got it perfect.

1126098 Jacques might have ta choke a bitch.
Why'd i say that?

oh how I hate waiting for new chapters of good fics.

1710536 I know right :twilightangry2: but what can ya do.

1733870 nothing but wait I guess.

Damn that was good, you should finish this story! I want MOAR!:flutterrage:


Choosing his seat carefully Jon sat, cyber bird on his shoulder, and awaited the beginning of what was likely to be the best worst musical ever, of all time.

Red vs Blue reference. I got it.:raritywink:

when he leaves the hospital, "here's a lollipop! you may have herpes, but it tastes like cinnamon!"

“YA’AL STAY AWAY FROM HER!” a voice shouted from behind Jon, and with a sickening crack something hard struck the back of his head. Whatever hit him had hit him hard, and he was unconscious before he hit the ground.


The lack of updates disturbs me.

This man... This is something beautiful to reignite the passion in my old heart... :rainbowderp:

Wha.. what? This is not being updated?! ... SHIET!

What the FUCK is an Update?!

A JonTron crossover fic!

I don't get it...

I see this thing in the popular box, and I get interested because I was watching JonTron a lot last week. I look at the last time the author was on, and I see it's been over 100 weeks. I also look at the last time and find that the story hasn't been updated since 2012.

Why is in the popular box? I would get it's because the story is popular and everyone loves it but... That was 2 years ago, wasn't it? I mean, JonTron is still popular now, but this story in the popular box for no reason?

Can someone explain that to me?

2879634 you mean that crappy egoraptor cartoon

And now Jon has blunt force trauma. FUCKIN' BRILLIANT.


LOL, GTA refrence.

eternal cliffhanger WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


5728434 hes been offline for 145 weeks, maybe someone should write there own

Okay, this is hilarious. I'm definitely tracking this, and can't wait for the next chap-
last updated 3 years ago
Damn it.

Login or register to comment
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!