• Member Since 12th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen 32 minutes ago

Jest


Want more? Head on over to patreon, or subscribestar. Or join my discord https://discord.gg/m2wZEKpcwu

T

Shining Armor has become an alicorn for some reason, and with no explanation available ponies assume ascendancy is sexually transmitted. Much to Twilight's irritation.


No actual sexually explicit content here, but there are references and some minor bad language.

This was a request for a patron, and was veiwable earlier for said patrons. Head over here if you want a chance of getting a story like this for just 5$!

Brought to you by the donations for my mom! (Find out more about that here.)

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 49 )

Okay i am about to read this but i have to say before i do that this stories description already is making me think of Alicornication (by Sporktacles)

Well, this was entertaining.

“And now that it's been disproven what are you going to do?” Twilight asked.
“Probably get a donut.” Remarked Big Mac.

Good old Big Mac. Always classy.

9998320
Or How to Steal Centuries and Field Notes on Alicorn Reproductive Behavior by biologic orthodoxy

9998356
I've never actually read either. I assume they are related in some way?

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:nice work:twilightsmile:

9998358
Well, they both involve hooking up with an alicorn to become an alicorn.

...um, I’ve heard.

Twilight and her brother eyed each other carefully, both chewing their lips nervously. Occasionally one of them fluffed their wings awkwardly.

“I won’t tell mom and dad if you don’t,” Twilight said, eventually.

"Right. Stars aligned, prophecies fulfilled."

"Good diet, healthy exercise..."

"Right."

"Right."

9998358
9998356
Here's a free idea that I never got around to fleshing out:
Sexually Transmitted Futa: The Futapocalypse!

If you have sex with a futa, you (male or female) become one! But it turns out that futa are sterile, and can't have foals. The only way they can reproduce is like vampires, by turning more ponies! They can't stop themselves either, since they have an uncontrollable libido! And futas aren't attracted to other futas. Until all that's left of Equestria is a few pockets of un-turned fertile ponies living in hardened shelters, with billions of horny futas bearing down on their last strongholds!

[Edit]: Someone could totally pull off this story with a Teen rating, provided that they aren't graphic about the... "process". You could even do the story as a 'past tense flashback fic' in the style of World War Z. "How did the world come to this? Well I'll tell you..."

* Trottingham is going to leave the Equestrian Union, not the Equestria itself. (Trottxit?)
:)

I enjoyed this piece. It had me laughing every few paragraphs. Upvoted and you got me to comment. Bravo! :coolphoto:
I noticed a few minor grammar/spelling errors, but nothing big.

Ahahahaha, they got Twilight good. I love stories where multiple ponies cooperate to prank Twilight.

...That was a prank, right? I was getting the impression that Starlight cast a spell to create an illusion of wings on Trixie.

Unless the story was right...

9998384
Nah they plan on chipping away from Equestria itself and becoming an island.
9998400
Nope. You guessed correctly.

9998356
I never read that one, i will have to look it up.

9998358
In Alicornication most of Equestia's population has become Alicorn's and it is discovered that Alicorncation is a STD, a Council is called to figure out just how it spread so fast, in all truth i would suggest at least giving it a read.

9998499
I'll add it the pile XD

9998510
Hope you enjoy

Also i finished reading this and i got to say i loved the ending, though i doubt Twilight will be very happy once she realized what Starlight and Trixie did.

Some typos/suggestions:

Can we just get past that part and say it was a delayed effect from Cadance and I defeating Chrysalis

from Cadance and me

Though I’d say it was more me then you

Other then that there is more uncertainty surrounding the question if Trottingham is going to leave Equestria after all.

than

Actually shes a bit overbearing

she's

Your a dragon Spike.

What can I say, your hot.

Your spreading baseless rumours that have made my day a nightmare!

Your like the most bookish pony ever.

You're

only to run back and grab a peice of toast

Spike exclaimed before grabbing Twilight’s remaining peice of toast.

She declared, while lounging on her peice of furniture.

This peice of media is satire,

piece

I didn't know her and Zecora were that close.

she and Zecora

Still, I’m glad you came to tell me straight away, even if its rather late.

I don't care if its proper.

I know its not proper to do it without getting married,

Yes, but now everyone wants to have sex with me and its terrible.

it's

all the necessary precautions against suck laws, see?

such

though his cooperation was not coerced in anyway.

in any way.

Haha, Twilight is so funny in this story

Pfft. Slick. :rainbowlaugh:
Tons of errors everywhere, but it was still funny. Have a thumb.

9998358
9998367

Those stories were the first things I thought about too...

Field Notes sets the premise using Twilight, but finishes with the best joke. How to Steal Centuries then plays the joke completely straight.

But this, Jest, would have made for a great way to re-spin the whole shebang as a joke again.

And now I'm imagining that it's only because of Luna's sleep forays that Big Mac can be an alicorn in his dreams...

I ended up liking this story a lot more than I thought I would.

9998320
I'm thinking of a different one but can't for the life of me remember the title. Same concept but focused on Twilight x Celestia. Shining Armour ascending at the end of the fic was just a small gag thing which I think Twilight assumed he was rear-ended by Cadance.

I'm not sure what's the better ending.

Trixie actually managing to fool Twilight with fake wings, or it actually working and Trixie slept her way to the top.

9998853
Lemme know if you remember the name, since it sounds hilarious.

Shining Armor has become an alicorn for some reason, and with no explanation available ponies assume ascendancy is sexually transmitted. Much to Twilight's irritation.

that reminds me a story..

https://www.fimfiction.net/story/320732/alicornication

>choking it up

Chalking. The metaphor is applying chalk to a chalkboard or other surface to write down a speculation or assumption.

Comment posted by The Computer Pony deleted Dec 22nd, 2019

Hope this leads to a sequel to this, I always love Princess Futa Twilight.

9999051
Came here to post this comment. =D

9999536
You and the seven other people that have already said exactly the same thing.

:moustache: I got wings!
:twilightangry2: Rarity what did you do to Spike!?!
:raritycry: TWILIGHT LET ME EXPLAIN!
:moustache: Really can kissing do that?
:facehoof:
:duck: yes

9999051
9999000 Is the one that I've read. Got the little check on the box and everything.

- So, when will they vanish?
- In a day or so. I put a bare minimum of energy into this one.
________________________________________
- You know, it's a week already.
- Yes, it is.
- And they are still there.
- Yes they are, Trixy.
- And that part appeared the next day.
- Yes, it did.
- So, what now?
- Apparently you are an actual princess now, Trix.
- And?
- And I'll go make her sleep with me, that's what! We spent last 3 days going through every possible and impossible position in Ponysutra for no result!

Meanwhile at the Castle of Friendship Twilight looks through a scrying spell at something and laughs erratically.

I'm not sure what to think or feel about this, and I don't think I want to dig myself into this insanity.

9998859
Well Starlight was there so they aren't fake exactly, they just aren't Alicorn wings.

10000666
Actually, I believe the ending ambiguous enough that either scenario could be true. Either Trixie had tricked Twilight, or it actually worked and Starlight was there for ulterior motives.

Wow. Trollestia would give then some kind of medal for this prank.

Comment posted by Johnny Walker deleted Dec 27th, 2019

Though I’d say it was more me then you considering

than

Other then that there is more uncertainty surrounding

than

Your a dragon Spike. It doesn't work that way.”

You’re

“What can I say, your hot.”

you’re

precautions against suck laws, see?”

such

“This peice of media is satire, and any depictions or references to real ponies is not intentional.”

piece

That's certainly...one way to get laid... :moustache:

Am I the only one to assume that Shining became an Alicorn because he helped conceive Flurry something that had never happened before in Equestria and his wings appeared as soon as they were conceived

Twilight shuddered only to realize that Big Mac was standing nearby, a frown on his face. “Don't tell me you were here for the same reason.” Twilight muttered angrily.
Big Mac nodded.

I mean, he literally dreamed about it. (See "do princesses dream of magic sheep", s05e13.)
derpicdn.net/img/view/2018/12/9/1903322.png
Source.

This time it was Trixie’s turn to get interrupted when Twilight all but pounced on her, pressing their lips together.

Later:
:facehoof:: "You've got to be kidding me!"
derpicdn.net/img/view/2021/7/16/2657317.png
Source.


Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.

The ending implies Trixies wings are fake and this is just a prank, right?

Trixie lay there, sprawled on her four poster bed, a cigar sticking out of the corner of her mouth, bedding only half covering her naked body.

:rainbowhuh: Umm... naked as opposed to... what? Her usual everyday-nudity?

:rainbowderp: ... oh, right, Trixie usually wears a hat.

:pinkiegasp: ...gasp! So she's hatless now?! How SCANDALOUS!

10947251
About my previous comment is that the case with this story? Pm me if you don't want to reveal the truth outright

11104663
yeah nah, the wings were fake. They were pulling one over on ol' Twilight.

11104670
Seriously?!:twilightangry2: There is no indication that Shining was part of the joke. I was talking about how Shining Armor should have ascended upon conception of Flurry Heart! Not the Trixie and Starlight thing at the end of the story.

I was actually happy that someone else wrote a story about that without explicit implications

11104685
Shining's thing was unrelated.

11104703
Well my question was did Shining ascend your story from the conception of Flurry Heart, that part of the story heavily implies it

11104729
yeah pretty much. I was going to mention that it was a sort of burst of newborn alicorn energy which got him.

11104739
Thank you I'm incredibly happy that I wasn't the only one who thought of that (seriously whenever I write stories that feature Shining Armor in any way if it's after Flurry Heart's conception I always make him an alicorn, even sometimes before that)

Login or register to comment